411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjlzYtPaM2S
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq699hYrpnk
     For long minutes, I stroke Jessy's wet hair, trying to soothe his pain, his fears. When he straightens his face, he seems ashamed to have cried in my arms. Delicately, I wipe away his last tears, surprised that he lets me do it, and smile at him to reassure him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbvDQ1LfAm
    We set off on our way back in torrential rain, yet we walk peacefully, savoring the fact of being together. I don't care if it rains as long as I'm with him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuI688k2zaP
    — Anyway, we're already soaked, I answer Jessy when he asks me if I want to run to get to his house faster. It'll be OK ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2Aeoc2W4x
    — Yeah, I think so.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgz9BcjpXd
    — Jessy, please promise me you’ll never let yourself fall into the void like that again. I got the fright of my life.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4tlbg3zi1
    Hands in his pockets, he shrugs his shoulders and breathes deeply before telling me : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeFBI29xyj
    — Promise. Why do you care about me so much ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NMTE5lHEd
    His question makes my heart beat faster. I'm not ready to tell him the feelings he inspires in me. I have to analyze them first and try to find out what he feels. So even though I feel my cheeks turning pink, I answer him evasively.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5o9yq9uq1
    — Why not ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl17nV6YmEp
    — When people learn about AIDS, they turn their backs on me. This is why my mother and I came to live here. Even my father-in-law couldn't stand me living under his roof anymore.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3fCq72e82
    — There are morons everywhere, I whisper. Jessy, I like you. I'm not going to start ignoring you because you have a health problem.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7K2ykAidX6
    — Thank you, he murmurs, pursing his lips. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean to be so rude.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZ3dpxXyJU
    His unexpected apology really makes me happy. When Jessy stops telling me off, I see in him the boy I had guessed at first glance : A good guy to whom difficult things happen. I think that's why he always tries to show an angry face, he has suffered so much that he doesn't want people to perceive his fragility.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SRk1GGzzB
    — It's forgotten. By the way, I met your mother. She seems very nice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnQ7rnawRUi
    Despite our slow walk, we already arrive in front of his house.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiddq87oHVj
    — She is. Do you want me to take you home ? I can borrow his car.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2TPjo6jwf
    — No, it is going to be fine. I don't want to get the seats soggy, I smile. See you tomorrow ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZSgHzsc1M
    I am happy to see him nod with a big smile. And as I walk away, I realize I've never been closer to him than I am tonight.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT9519rRD0y
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLZzJxCgRN
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkF8xv7U9tW
    It's almost 11 p.m. when I get home, completely soaked. My parents are waiting for me, impatient and worried.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRaOKb3buzC
    — Finally, here you are, my father roared. Look at you, you're good at wringing ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNArOF2K6IG
    — Were you with Jessy ? My mother asks in her usual soft voice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5CsJG6P8f5
    I nod, shivering from the cold.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXme8TvHght
    — We spoke with Mrs. Sutter at the meeting. She told us that her son had been missing for hours and that she had no idea where he might be. She was very worried about him, my father told me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKo0m5Fval
    — He went back home. How did the meeting go ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQjwi08PWtY
    — Start by drying off, we'll tell you later.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJojKDaJz9
    I head into the bathroom where I warm up quickly and quickly put on my pajamas, as well as a warm dressing gown, as I can't wait to see how the evening unfolds. I find my parents in the living room, where everyone, in an armchair, drinks coffee while waiting for me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKKPvawE3i
    — So how did it go ? I said, sitting across from them on the couch.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjW2vGSyDNi
    — Difficult to say, my father grimaces. The principal had asked a doctor to come and answer the parents' questions. It calmed some when he assured their children were not at risk of breathing the same air as Jessy or touching him. But other parents are obtuse and want him to be expelled at all costs. They are simply scared to death, to the point of not understanding that AIDS is not caught like that.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK69mmGPtNq
    — Mrs. Sutter spoke, saying how much she loves her son and that there is no risk in sharing his life since she has been doing it for a year without problem, my mother added. She is a very dignified and courageous woman. She told us you came to see her.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4RHx4SQDX
    — Indeed, I was looking for Jessy.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCfCNVOx5V
    — Nina told us that you went looking for him after Chad’s visit. Did you find it ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqoHHAUXRSY
    — Yes, and as far as you know, it’s over between Chad and me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo8K9per54Z
    Contrary to what I thought, my father doesn't seem surprised. My mother must have already told him about it. However, I don't like the look they exchange before my mother asks me : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5C88iROeQ
    — Because of Jessy ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAtD9uH7zm
    — Yes and no. Jessy and I are friends. But let’s say that meeting him allowed me to open my eyes to Chad and his little world. I realized that, contrary to what I believed, I am not in love with him. I like him a lot but in a friendly way.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLw3iXX8iIW
    Once again my parents exchange this strange look which seems to mean that they are not at the end of their trouble with me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rLx1jSHTQ
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAgfCtGVym
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbtxzg5SQs
    The next morning, when I arrived near the school, I saw Jessy waiting outside on the sidewalk.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfkWh9KF5Vi
    — Hi, how are you ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3oo91aFp4
    He puts a hand to his heart.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8eXC1xs7e
    — Oh, you scared me ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZYclVwk61q
    I burst out laughing.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9g4uTxH7gM
    — That’s for the scare you gave me last night ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2MwX7PoKo1
    — It’s fair game, he smiled.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgUp6SblFvS
    He stares at the large white building without taking a step towards it. Since I stayed in his arms the day before for several minutes, he no longer intimidates me as much, and this impression of knowing him for a long time has strengthened. I saw his fragility behind his anger, I saw his despair, but also his strength.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANg9QOwTYI
    — Are you planning to come to class today ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhN2UFWN82
    — I don't know. After what happened yesterday...and then this meeting.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgInqdq8jZq
    He huffs and then purses his lips, visibly uncomfortable.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNHGtVbAjT
    — Did your mother tell you ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiFynIEEsg
    — Yes, apparently the parents can't do anything against me, but there is always the possibility that they will contact the academy and file a complaint to have me fired. In fact, I wonder if it wouldn't be better if I gave up... 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzfErW8oIn
    — No way ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnUNrMg9PG2
    Jessy looks at me, surprised.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjjKQbvv0o
    — We'll go together and everything will go well, you'll see.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtphIBlP4z
    — There are looks that are sometimes hard to bear, he admits to me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLSSrGkvcrz
    However, I notice that he accompanies me towards high school.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbSZSe9bsj
    — I believe that, unfortunately, you can never please everyone, so give a chance to know you to those who want it and forget the morons.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBHAUeVFf4
    We enter the main hallway, students turn to look at us as I continue talking so that he focuses more on my voice than on the eyes focused on him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs7r7rFeIZ2
    — With time, there will be those who will realize who you really are and they will come to you, as for those who continue to criticize you, act as if they don't exist. They're the idiots, not you.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBHzniQfuF1
    I meet the gaze of a tall guy, named Tyler, who grimaces when he hears me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhC2TBOSkTX
    — Yes, complete idiots, I said again in a louder voice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn50mixyw1B
    Jessy gives me a grateful smile.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ66DH6G2zgS
    — Oh, it’s getting bad, he murmurs.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0QDJrsUzo
    I follow his gaze and see Chad striding towards us. He stands in front of Jessy and, after a few seconds of hesitation, offers his hand.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA6HQUMSoRv
    — I'm sorry for yesterday. For the fight…and everything else. I should never have listened to your conversation and above all I should never have repeated his secret. I'm really sorry.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZaLtCTU9O
     Jessy hesitates for a few seconds then squeezes his hand, nodding.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHZCVQUKQq
    — Thanks.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0d2ZYwpS0H
    His eyes move from Jessy to me, he doesn't seem to know how to behave around me anymore.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36dWpLKNbw
    Around us, several students observe the scene. Chad is the most popular boy in school and I suspect that after this reconciling handshake, the attitude of some people will change.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAFQU5XlDNx
    He taps Jessy on the shoulder and says — See you later and walks away.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpc1xnDShJT
    — It’s weird that Chad came to apologize. Did you ask him to do it ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTRdmS653fp
    — No, he did it alone, but you know, he’s like that. He is impulsive, but quickly regrets his outbursts... I feel, more than I see, Jessy looking at me in profile.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡde9Dyqtl4r
    — What ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflhRXPajE6
    I turn my head towards him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1jdtjub9TO
    — Why did you break up ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqV8eY99h0D
    — We are too different.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYuVu2gUPm
    I shrug my shoulders as if it were obvious.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbuy1AcN66
    — And are you okay ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCL6U5OpaJ7
    I see in his eyes that he really cares about me, it warms my heart.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtLXgW3R2w
    — Alright.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4ql13smOW
    A small smile appears at the corners of his lips.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0nwcTwolr
    — I know you don't like Chad very much, but erase that little smug look. (I smile in turn as the bell rings for the start of classes.) We're going to be late, come on.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznuoAQZoOp
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDlAYDBLm9j
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27usZV7iEL
    In the days that followed, things calmed down at the school. I can't say that Jessy goes unnoticed, but he is seen less as an outcast, which is already a small victory. At school, I was always the model student, collecting good grades. The super serious girl who has the teachers on her side. When I dated Chad, who is the most popular guy, I became popular and other girls tended to take their cues from me. So, even if there are a few who look away and whisper as she passes, most of the students are starting to accept Jessy. Since the evening on the bridge, we have spent a lot of time together. I prefer to be with him rather than with my pseudo friends : Pearl and especially Amy, who has turned her back on me since Chad and I separated.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQKUCR1Q7US
    Jessy has become my best friend. I can talk to him about everything without being afraid that he will judge me; however, he always gives me his honest opinion.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvj4hggSm2L
    Jessy lived surrounded by family and friends before learning of his HIV status, but he told me that when those close to him learned of his illness, everyone turned their backs on him and, overnight, he found himself abandoned. Only his mother remained near him. By moving to Millisky where Mrs. Sutter found a job as a secretary in a bank, she hoped that her son would finally be able to return to a normal life.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIZEgev0b4
    The more I get to know him and the less I want this solitary life for him, it's like a kind of mission that I have set for myself. I may not be able to save him, but I can make him smile again. Also, I force him to accompany me to the cinema, to the theater, to fast food. Jessy complains, protests, sometimes drags his feet, but in the end, I always make him give in.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95AqvGHAWw
    — You've lived locked up enough like that ! » is my key phrase to convince him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXcfot0qty
    He then rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation while his cross— shaped earring swings to the rhythm of his breathing. Finally, he looks at me with a little smile which alone symbolizes my victory.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5txZfmlKCf
    I am myself with him. We have a lot of tastes in common, we laugh at the same jokes, we talk about everything and nothing without ever getting tired of it. And when I'm not with him, he haunts my mind. He is the first person I think of in the morning when I wake up and the last in the evening before I go to sleep. In a few weeks, it has invaded my life and I hope more than anything that it continues as long as possible.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQdMcAlNVxP
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3VwDKSRIwG
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUzZhQQaGD
    — Hello Mrs. Sutter, are you well ? I say happily as I enter the living room, accompanied by Jessy.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEsmaKz4xjh
    Over the past few weeks, I've been spending so much time at the Sutters' that it feels like my second home. I really like Jessy's mother. Just by his look, we perceive his kindness and his strength. I am always welcome at their home and even though Jessy can come to my house whenever he wants, I understand that he is more comfortable in his environment.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu3xyslCN2y
    — Good Meg and you ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyox1yICRJf
    — I’m fine.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfDmf1Top6
    Elise gets up while Jessy goes to turn on the television.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiE1J4o6MLZ
    — What movie are you going to watch ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSvRfIRdqRJ
    — Ghost ! With a big smile, I show the video tape I brought, asking him : Are you staying to watch it with us ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3aKhWENOt4
    — Unfortunately, I can't. I have not finished completing a loan application for a client. I’m going to go lock myself in my room with this file, she sighs.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfc5PQFpcDa
    — Good luck, Mrs Sutter. 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnZImrxddda
    She takes a few steps away before turning back to me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd75iAi57PE
    — Meg, for the hundredth time, call me Elise.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUfH7HpmsRu
    — I'll try, I promise.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMDGPgPi3Z
    His mother leaves the room, leaving us alone.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4pRHjvz0sy
    — Pop corn ? Jessy asks me. I only have salty, I don't like sweet.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyQZnSiGvZ
    — That suits me very well.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCXA4qtL5R
    Once the popcorn is in a large bowl, we sit on the sofa in front of the television. Almost two hours later, I overcame my fear that he would send me away for daring to lean my head on Jessy's shoulder. To my great relief, he just smiled as he continued to watch the film. Now that it is ending, I can no longer contain my emotion and shed many tears.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBWC5vKGQYE
    — Don’t make fun, I said, seeing him laugh discreetly.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvvQebOOj9m
    I stand up and stretch before wiping my eyes.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWbhe0MRgo
    — Patrick Swayze is too sexy, I comment.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfG6IJezGBM
    — Demi Moore is not to be outdone, he sighs, lowering his head.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOjlfhuJfWV
    He suddenly seems sad, which worries me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyqkOPWiXRX
    — Isn't that okay ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzXBqQHl2D
    — Yes, it’s just that… Do you believe that the afterlife exists ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYPwnrrsDA
    Still sitting on the couch, I turn to him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpsRpyVxg1
    — I think yes. However, I don't know if it's like in this movie.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyWRA2fsA19
    He adopts the same position as me, we find ourselves face to face.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZpYGedtfZ
    — If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to let you know when I get there.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY31EosKHLT
    I wasn't expecting this response which took me completely by surprise. New uncontrollable tears flood my face. Reality suddenly reminds me. When I am with Jessy, I forget his illness because he is him, the boy I love with all my heart even if he knows nothing about my feelings. But there, faced with the virus, I find myself facing its imminent death. It’s a horrible thing that I try not to think about, as if that could prevent it from happening. I know this is stupid and despite all my efforts, AIDS still remains in the back of my mind. But hearing Jessy talk about his departure is upsetting. I would love to tell him that I am in love with him and that he has no right to leave me, ever. However, this is one of the subjects that I cannot discuss with him as I am sure that he would send me away again. He needs support, so I'm content to be his friend, secretly hoping that one day he'll realize that I mean more to him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZPTWbyQkn
    — What do you have ? He is surprised.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjc60LkrSLK
    — I don't want you to die Jessy ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9S6rt9eSzk
    I burst into tears as I threw myself on his neck. Immediately, he hugs me back.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4wKVui7eR
    — Don’t cry, he whispers in my ear. I don't like seeing you sad.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzI0L6CMeam
    His heart beating wildly against my chest reminds me that he is still very much alive and that as long as that is the case, we must not lose hope.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsqOpq6Nw3M
    Staring at him, I detach myself from him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1RCtVwEUvK
    — You're going to fight to stay alive, aren't you ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyfPrWsJXVX
    He strokes a lock of my hair that falls to the side of his face while observing me attentively. He seems to weigh the weight of his words.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVQRS0cGx1
    Finally, he nods in agreement.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwjiahDM3r
    — I have confidence in the future and in medicine. They will find a cure, it’s just a matter of time, I resume with confidence.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEIXILhxUWS
    — Meg, we've already talked about this. You can't save me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5m3UzxjpPh
    He lowers his head but I have time to see his eyes fill with tears.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMS0hEDjRB2
    — I know... For the moment, but I can keep hope, I smile, wiping away the last tears that linger on my cheeks.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwwKyrUzu7
    Mrs. Sutter enters the room at this moment, breaking our moment of complicity.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8aIyDInLI1
    — Megan, are you crying ? She worries, looking at us in turn. And you too ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvgbdBowTA
    Jessy and I exchange a look before bursting out laughing under the surprised gaze of Elise.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPL1wvbNbdi
    — I’m going to go home, I announce, leaving the sofa.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bxHYisXSo
    — I'll take you back.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjmW8jawLP
    — No, it is going to be fine. I need to get some fresh air.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6e84zmqcY
    Above all, I need to expel from my body this disorder that I am trying to control, and also to silence my fears about its future. Kindly, he will get me my coat. After putting it on, I turn to him and take him in my arms. For a few more seconds, I want to feel him against me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVBVP0cJS3c
    — Do me a favor, hold on to life, I whisper in his ear.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsa8m0D4OoK
    Emu, he acquiesced.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVmPH8qaek
    When I leave the warmth of his arms, I see Elise watching us from the kitchen, she wears a little knowing smile, which makes me understand that she knows perfectly well how I feel about her son.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfCq0iHF5FN
    — Good night, see you tomorrow ! I throw before going out.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNAiHGaiwI
    I take a few steps while staring at the dark sky, inside I promise myself to do everything to save Jessy's life.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJ4rWwChEu
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfsNuckpnh
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKxv55GdI0
    Since Jessy stubbornly refuses to tell me about his virus, during the days that follow, I go around bookstores looking for medical journals. At that time, when AIDS was terrifying the population, I had hoped to learn more, unfortunately the articles were still rare and the possible treatments even more so. Everyone repeats the instructions to follow in order not to be contaminated but none of them informs me about the solutions to overcome this cursed disease.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzlLaGJ1jm9
    — What is all this ? My mother asks me when I return home, my arms full of magazines and books.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9pAUsOwvb
    — I'm finding out about AIDS, I admit, placing my load on the kitchen table.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOy7kD9qcKj
    — Meg, I know you care about Jessy but... Don't waste your life for him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzNaChB1U3
    My mother's words felt like a stab to the heart.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIoxnYrub7
    — That's not what I meant, she continues, realizing my fear.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6ZocLjbX0
    Hand on her forehead, she shakes her head as I grab my books again, determined to put an end to this discussion.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmR0cAFDVpO
    — Megan, you are 16 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdmnzMMjLev
    — And not Jessy, right ? ! I get angry.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrueTjRpH7
    My mother looks down.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEo8e2QaXNB
    — That's not what I said. I just think you're too young to have all these worries. You should be able to enjoy your teenage years completely carefree.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTxjyXP5fw5
    — I would have liked it too, Mom, believe me I would have preferred that Jessy wasn’t sick. But he is and if I can help him in any way I will be there for him. I realize there's not much I can do, however, maybe one of these books will talk about a treatment and I can tell Jessy about it.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzpiokm7R8N
    My mother nods weakly.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWdMY6QKqoF
    — I just ask you to be careful. Don't get too involved.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxdjMnWoNP
    — It's already too late for that, I emphasize. If it was Dad who was sick, wouldn't you do what you could to help him ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFrMcr7ktL
    I turn on my heel, ready to leave the room when my mother asks me : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8sSdsrKMH
    — You love him, don’t you ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaZzWKmUwd
    I don't answer. I lock my gaze on my mother's, trying to make her understand all the feelings that are inside me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbnhMeGPGi
    — Please don’t tell Jessy about these books, I ask her before going out.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAlAH9knEr
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrcj9n6a17m
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEKcFMT7BKy
    — Good evening, Megan, Mrs. Sutter calls me from the kitchen when I arrive at their house.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUMPkUNXyxO
    — Good evening.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJyiMNA8h6F
    — Jessy hasn’t come home yet.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa50FdZJXDC
    I look up at his mother with worried eyes. It's 8 p.m., classes ended several hours ago.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjHq5YOIL7t
    — Don’t worry, she reassures me. You know that his doctor advised him to go to the AIDS center, there was a meeting this evening. He had no desire to go, but I think it will do him good to talk to people who are going through the same thing as him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoj66OGkNh
    — Did he leave there complaining ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpL7lSVfuK
    — You know him well enough to know that he complains a lot, she said, smiling.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIgy8S4Phh
    — When he is with me, he is rather...411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvfGuPgBYe6
    Hearing the front door open, I don't finish my sentence.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcFHYrTw7uY
    — Yes, but you are special to him, Elise whispers to me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXA7R3Okv7O
    I remain speechless, wondering what she means by that.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6mWqupe1r
    — Sorry to be late.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKaM5CauF2
    Jessy's face is tense, he seems upset. The evening could be long if he remains in this state of mind.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1xUE9DkhTs
    — How was it ? His mother immediately questions him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLo64OlXQVD
    Jessy glances at me quickly before responding coldly : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHQgLHkAT4
    — I don't want to talk about it.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ikPpZhOtf
    Mrs. Sutter looks at us in turn before announcing that she is going to watch television in her room so that we can watch the screen in the living room. Jessy walks around the bar and goes to help herself to some fruit juice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFE9aPx6WW
    — You want some ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9vF23GGIn
    His tone is less cold, but still full of anger that he tries to contain.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsXlENs05z
    — Yes, thanks.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpQNfAgxTJ
     He purses his lips before asking me : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeasZUfoUVA
    — What movie did you bring this evening ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxBjBziFsh
    The week before, I had brought the filmGhost which caused us both to end up in tears. This time, I chose to take a lighter one, but still with my favorite actor. Proudly, I take the video tape out of my backpack and show it to him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6shhy17A7
    — Dirty Dancing ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eKRINwarZ
    He rolls his eyes, but I sense that he is holding back a smile.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxPqyWnZoJJ
    — You and your Patrick Swayze ! I know you think he's the most handsome guy in the world, but your obsession with him is starting to turn into an obsession.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9i0zGtrUM
     I pretend to look shocked, which makes him laugh.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsBYY2UKU7
    — It’s true that he’s hot, but in my ranking of the most handsome guys, he only occupies second place.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36adIEFDqt
    — Oh, my God, he whispers with a hint of despair. Which other actor are you planning to pester me with when you're done making me watch all his films ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMYlFJaQrv
    Jessy sighs, making a face. His good mood has returned, which makes me happy. I don't want to ask him about the meeting; If he wants to talk to me about it, he will do it alone. I just want to take his mind off things and see him smile. I get up to turn on the VCR while he puts away the bottle of orange juice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUh5xz5qtd
    — No others, I promise. For me, the hottest guy isn't an actor.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTEDBQmG5zM
    — Ah good ? Who is it ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ84fWGmVuEt
    He comes to join me on the sofa, frowning.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahbJPpuv6j
    — He’s someone I see every day.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Vyjcg7yLf
    The movie starts and I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my friend racking his brain to figure out who I'm talking about.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJeEXK8ZxD6
    — Your father ? he asks after a few minutes.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGviCXNf0q
    Without taking my eyes off the screen, I shake my head and smile. It amuses me to see him searching.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1xXNY2lt6
    — Someone from high school ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKjFCAYj80
    J'acquiesce411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLVMr8XdLh
    — Chad ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8UX6Hkfs89
    A hint of anger and disbelief filters into his voice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmDAtOdKne
    — No. Jessy, do you want to watch the movie or tell me all the names of the guys at school ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlmkoEF9ak
    — Sorry, but no matter how hard I look, I can’t see who…411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkvewsAu61V
    — It's you.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ12ALnMvVHT
    I didn't mean to tell him, it just came out, and now I feel myself blushing as I keep my eyes glued to the television. The words have barely passed my lips before Jessy chokes on swallowing and starts coughing. He gets up to go drink some water.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqpQM5O8AN
    — Well, that makes you feel, I said mockingly, pausing the movie.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0C916m3OGG
    — You got me, he says from the kitchen.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnkSTxxBCF
    I turn around on the couch to look at him.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjzx5tSkdc
    — It’s the truth, Jessy, I’m not making you walk.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5kfhLx4awd
    He comes back to sit next to me on the sofa. His cheeks are red as he places a kiss on my forehead.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3IzOv0j7q
    — It’s nice of you to try to cheer me up. I love you.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7w4OB7D7VF
    That's not what I'm trying to do, I really mean it, yet my heart immediately races : he adores me. 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwbQjNgANEP
    — Is it true ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡankiqPOJI8
    — Of course. You're my best friend, Meg.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡekYUUaycY1
    Oh… Friend ? My heart calms down quickly.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZq0xMmSKY
    — Aren’t you in good spirits ? Is it because of the meeting ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOgrY4Job3
    Your mother told me about it, I add in front of his frown.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjgcHlttF8
    — Yeah… it was depressing. Hearing all these patients talk about their fears… it brought me back to my own.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡREzvpQ1z2M
    — Did you speak with them ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJgLliZ5pT
    — No, I listened to them. It’s strange to arrive in this center where I don’t know anyone and where they invite me to confide.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFOE7kcAe3n
    — If you want, next time, can I accompany you ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyu1yMd1Vh5
    I suggest, but I already know the answer.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4yVTIxS1qs
    — Non ! 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlblRZ5aYnq
    His tone is harsher than I thought. However, he softens very quickly.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBMjcFpfxh
    — That’s nice, but no. I don't want you to come into this part of my life.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRAP8aw22x
    — For what ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58On6S2XZI
    Anger reappears in his eyes, he lowers his head.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡefwFHdrkzU
    — Because you are too important to me for me to drag you into this world of illness with me.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRdgYdMY5T9
    — Jessy… 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtgQNLardv
    — No, Meg. I'm willing to give in when you force my hand to leave this house, but when it comes to AIDS, I won't change my mind, he said firmly, turning his gaze back to the television.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLj6sURhTq
    — OK as you want.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDkANs3e7YY
    I sigh as he resumes playing the movie. After a few minutes of silence, he glances at me and whispers : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxpgbYohXtV
    — Are you mad at me ? 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6ayUyDv8a
    I can't help but smile and lean my head on his shoulder like I've gotten used to doing when we watch movies together.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIjl8m77lU
    — No, it’s your choice.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlhnIYqVuFV
    He places another kiss on my forehead. I whisper to him without taking my eyes off Patrick Swayze : 411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzS2O9hiqb
    — Me too, I like you.411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAbXa3yML7
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWQ5OmZjzt
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodIPcuFCzC
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPi7U7xt1TW
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNI4AFToqy
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfhRk500tdH
     411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNw8dRnAUsz
    8964 copyright protection407ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxV6uEhlzM 維尼

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