(光陰似梭,日月如箭。不知不覺,已過去N年)52Please respect copyright.PENANAgpgkhtQmZF
(一日,菩提祖師高坐聖壇,正在論經講道)52Please respect copyright.PENANACNIFGddWH1
悟空:哈哈哈哈!哈哈哈哈!……52Please respect copyright.PENANArUHd6yNXiw
菩提祖師:悟空,你不專心聽課,為何大笑?52Please respect copyright.PENANASsfpKfAwhs
(悟空在身上摸來摸去,忽然一抖右手,拿出一只小老鼠)52Please respect copyright.PENANAsrDEchcOkT
悟空:師父,一只小老鼠在我的衣服裏跑來跑去,撓的我癢癢,所以弟子大笑。52Please respect copyright.PENANA2c3toZFJEL
菩提祖師:現在在上課,你不能忍忍嗎?52Please respect copyright.PENANAsN9ZbMwDAf
悟空:弟子已經忍很久。52Please respect copyright.PENANANnSTPTby6G
菩提祖師:有多久?52Please respect copyright.PENANAF7hypLEQOP
悟空:弟子每年都去後山桃樹上吃桃,一共吃了八次。52Please respect copyright.PENANA9WvINclxfA
菩提祖師:啊!這麽說,你忍了八年?52Please respect copyright.PENANA3XN9nruLhw
悟空:弟子不敢確定。如果後山上的桃是一年兩結果,弟子只忍了四年。52Please respect copyright.PENANA2vCSAWF3mX
菩提祖師:後山上的桃是一年一結果,你忍了八年!52Please respect copyright.PENANADyjr8jZJ05
悟空:哇!我已經來這兒八年了……52Please respect copyright.PENANAIO4uW3VTxc
菩提祖師:是滴!52Please respect copyright.PENANAHAAorSuaOm
悟空:弟子來這兒八年吃桃八年,發現這座山上有一個極其重大的秘密。52Please respect copyright.PENANAsG5JEFfhNI
菩提祖師:什麽秘密?52Please respect copyright.PENANAdOj7eRWTxL
悟空:弟子每次吃完桃就會拉肚子。52Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6O3A8UToO
菩提祖師:哈哈哈哈!哈哈哈哈!………52Please respect copyright.PENANApK2w3O1MXb
悟空:師父為何大笑?52Please respect copyright.PENANA25ssMwauvC
菩提祖師:那後山長桃樹的山叫爛桃山,山上結的桃都是腐爛的桃,你吃了不拉肚子才怪呢!52Please respect copyright.PENANAfc7O8HoVG8
悟空:弟子吃了八年還在拉,弟子的抵抗力實在太差。52Please respect copyright.PENANAyez5vSuQJu
菩提祖師:你的忍耐力到挺強,竟能讓這只老鼠在身上待八年?52Please respect copyright.PENANAGmsJVfXinV
悟空:弟子沒什麽忍耐力。這只老鼠是我八年前在後山上收養的寵物,我一直把它帶在身上。52Please respect copyright.PENANAOaNUMsEAOi
菩提祖師:拿來我看。52Please respect copyright.PENANA8oX0AGPm6o
(悟空把老鼠遞給菩提祖師)52Please respect copyright.PENANAp2axsc2msl
菩提祖師:滿可愛的!悟空,你能不能幫為師在後山捉一只老鼠做寵物?52Please respect copyright.PENANA3LRfIdOEic
悟空:現在不能捉了。52Please respect copyright.PENANAohd2hO6inK
菩提祖師:嗯?為什麽?52Please respect copyright.PENANAejQflRGyvI
悟空:現在後山的老鼠滿身的鼠疫,收養那類的老鼠會死。52Please respect copyright.PENANAgAxCDgoJVV
菩提祖師:你的這只老鼠沒帶鼠疫?52Please respect copyright.PENANA3HvuK7uEBq
悟空:我這只老鼠是只進化鼠,沒鼠疫。52Please respect copyright.PENANAWSYLYSGzka
菩提祖師:你幫我也捉只進化鼠啊?52Please respect copyright.PENANADbdmGLPISz
悟空:沒有了。天地之間僅有這麽一只進化鼠。52Please respect copyright.PENANAzi7EHhmi9G
菩提祖師:這麽說,你這只進化鼠是個寶貝了?52Please respect copyright.PENANAztEOv914m8
悟空:是滴。52Please respect copyright.PENANA49wYkjmFVf
菩提祖師:送給為師怎樣?52Please respect copyright.PENANA0DUdSWy3r5
悟空:啊!師父的這個請求……52Please respect copyright.PENANAF1javWgzQ4
菩提祖師:孫悟空,你還想不想跟我混了?52Please respect copyright.PENANAuEJ1H6OYWD
悟空:師父的這個請求,弟子完全可以滿足。呵呵!52Please respect copyright.PENANAJZrK5Y7IYp
菩提祖師:這還差不多!52Please respect copyright.PENANAEePNCsVTXO
悟空:弟子也有請求,希望師父也能滿足弟子。52Please respect copyright.PENANA4PRSVGBFzt
菩提祖師:說!52Please respect copyright.PENANAu2tG2elTsH
悟空:我拜你為師八年了,你只是教我經道,一點點法術也沒教我。我來這兒的目的是做神仙,求你老人家教我神仙之術!52Please respect copyright.PENANAsUWg78mXUR
菩提祖師:好吧!你想學哪些神仙之術?52Please respect copyright.PENANAUUAsBMRLwC
悟空:隨便。只要是神仙用的。52Please respect copyright.PENANA1Nhl1By9gx
菩提祖師:我教你神仙用的術道如何?52Please respect copyright.PENANA4zIr3luF7k
悟空:什麽是術道?52Please respect copyright.PENANA1hC1oRlGWk
菩提祖師:替人算命用的。52Please respect copyright.PENANA5EkTpxiOaO
悟空:學會術道,能活多久?52Please respect copyright.PENANAr6jJDPvtBo
菩提祖師:不過百年。52Please respect copyright.PENANA6mPov3XUkF
悟空:不學!不學!52Please respect copyright.PENANAaaDp8yNuF4
菩提祖師:我教你神仙用的流道如何?52Please respect copyright.PENANAcS8cbuMUuB
悟空:什麽是流道?52Please respect copyright.PENANAhE8IJgGBEj
菩提祖師:念經用的。凡學會者,可口齒流離的念經誦佛。52Please respect copyright.PENANApNgWrkhBnb
悟空:學會流道,能活多久?52Please respect copyright.PENANAS4xHx2L2JQ
菩提祖師:不過百年。52Please respect copyright.PENANAph3yl8URfb
悟空:不學!不學!52Please respect copyright.PENANAdPzJZK9xup
菩提祖師:我教你神仙用的靜道如何?52Please respect copyright.PENANAM5AkD8d5gk
悟空:什麽是靜道?52Please respect copyright.PENANAJ0AYO7Zo53
菩提祖師:蹲點用的。打什麽CS啦、CF啦,以靜製動,殺傷力很大!52Please respect copyright.PENANASQKyyohOfA
悟空:學會靜道,能活多久?52Please respect copyright.PENANAduR2s7asMF
菩提祖師:不過百年。52Please respect copyright.PENANA1bqrA38rTD
悟空:不學!不學!52Please respect copyright.PENANADdO7a3mwVK
菩提祖師:我教你神仙用的動道如何?52Please respect copyright.PENANAJlS0muZ8nL
悟空:動道又是什麽?52Please respect copyright.PENANAPcDjRZqm1m
菩提祖師:是動力學,研究物體運動和物體之間的相互作用。52Please respect copyright.PENANAgoCmBFEO72
悟空:學會動道,能活多久?52Please respect copyright.PENANAvCDbPJpd9S
菩提祖師:不過百年。52Please respect copyright.PENANAQo8EVYh3cl
悟空:不學!不學!52Please respect copyright.PENANAdKIefTcoqV
菩提祖師:靠!你這猴子,這又不學那又不學,想學啥啊?!52Please respect copyright.PENANAZJSPYT2a4l
(啪!啪!啪!菩提祖師給了悟空三個耳光,背手拿著老鼠走了。)52Please respect copyright.PENANADjE6M7kHd0
(夜半三更,悟空悄悄走進菩提祖師的臥床)52Please respect copyright.PENANA0S09UelkZo
菩提祖師:啊!(猛地醒來)52Please respect copyright.PENANAMgVLWdbXcZ
悟空:師父!師父!(拜倒在地)52Please respect copyright.PENANAKcl80JoOMd
菩提祖師:悟空?是你?你半夜三更跑我這幹嗎?52Please respect copyright.PENANAlUFIgaFgey
悟空:師父打了我三個耳光,背手而走,是暗示弟子今晚三更到此約會。52Please respect copyright.PENANAduyz3uEjMP
菩提祖師:啊?誰會跟你約會?!52Please respect copyright.PENANA8DB0jSiRxP
悟空:那我走了。52Please respect copyright.PENANAXBGojrHCGA
菩提祖師:等等。師父想尿尿,你快幫師父找找便壺。師父有夜盲癥,看不見。52Please respect copyright.PENANA4XKWPWuzOt
(悟空找到便壺)52Please respect copyright.PENANAZGUyYXZRmV
悟空:師父請用。52Please respect copyright.PENANALIFJcHVpuu
(菩提祖師撒完尿)52Please respect copyright.PENANAKDp3MtCK92
菩提祖師:好舒服啊!好爽啊!52Please respect copyright.PENANA85sVof2BOz
悟空:師父,你教弟子長生不老之術,弟子願天天半夜給你找便壺。52Please respect copyright.PENANAUzQMul9NsT
菩提祖師:哇!你這樣做付出太大了吧?52Please respect copyright.PENANALaR5JsFUbs
悟空(嚴肅地):弟子心甘情願!52Please respect copyright.PENANAgEeKaUlQph
菩提祖師:好吧!52Please respect copyright.PENANAa2Qi8vaNuS
悟空:師父,你答應弟子了?52Please respect copyright.PENANAssZs7eYsKu
菩提祖師:嗯啊!52Please respect copyright.PENANA9VlB3wX550
悟空:謝師父!謝師父!謝師父!……(磕頭無數)52Please respect copyright.PENANAAdhvUTFYtH
菩提祖師:悟空,為師有個毛病,每天晚上三更就要尿尿一次。因為患有夜盲癥,每天為找便壺在屋裏瞎摸到天亮。有你做幫手,我可以安心睡覺了。52Please respect copyright.PENANAQzKXyqxoUG
悟空:師父,那長生不老之術……52Please respect copyright.PENANAa4wTgQTBRb
菩提祖師:為師立刻傳你口訣。52Please respect copyright.PENANAsOZOenJ9lz
%^$#@^^&*()_+!@#,*()_$#%*(((&^%$#%。52Please respect copyright.PENANA87Jd9yKbkk
^*((&&^%$##@@@,#$%%^&&*(((*$###。52Please respect copyright.PENANAUPefEUw9uF
@#$%^&&**(OO×,((*&^%%$$##…@#。52Please respect copyright.PENANAsZG88Rfigq
&^%$#%^&(*&^%$,&)(*&^%$###%&*&。52Please respect copyright.PENANAEyhM0jsRZt
(悟空心領神會,練成長生不老之術。)52Please respect copyright.PENANAY6TGc5sIN1
(第二日夜半三更,悟空準時為菩提祖師找便壺)52Please respect copyright.PENANAZgC0MVDtKB
菩提祖師:悟空,師父教你個變身之法,你想學嗎?52Please respect copyright.PENANALHXta2OSjH
悟空:變身之法是什麽?52Please respect copyright.PENANAWM3YL4x2TY
菩提祖師:就是想變什麽就變什麽的法術。52Please respect copyright.PENANAOkw6jqHTe9
悟空:想變什麽就變什麽?52Please respect copyright.PENANAJVaBr8Tw3n
菩提祖師:嗯啊!52Please respect copyright.PENANA4qd1gYdOWl
悟空:為什麽要教弟子這個?52Please respect copyright.PENANAaYiJKB6YnZ
菩提祖師:我最近上火,喝水特別多,尿的尿也多。我的便壺容量小,裝不下我的尿,你變個便壺給我用。52Please respect copyright.PENANA0odY1cZu4Y
悟空:啊!這個……52Please respect copyright.PENANAzoJaKZXJNi
菩提祖師:你是不是不願學?52Please respect copyright.PENANAiPbOq5eAXy
悟空:弟子願學!弟子願學!52Please respect copyright.PENANA3byKC4lpC9
菩提祖師:好!現有36變和72變,你學哪個?52Please respect copyright.PENANAKioRTlnmt3
悟空:弟子108變全部想學。52Please respect copyright.PENANA6r6nZbKlat
菩提祖師:那我叫你72變。52Please respect copyright.PENANAleSnsoCVqk
悟空:剩下的36變你也教我吧?52Please respect copyright.PENANAA6BdYDljBn
菩提祖師:72變已包括36變,學了也是重復。52Please respect copyright.PENANAiOJSJuAT63
悟空:那就學72變。52Please respect copyright.PENANASZtSnaEuLj
菩提祖師:為師立刻傳你口訣。52Please respect copyright.PENANA39bwP8F3MD
%^$#@^^&*()_+!@#,*()_$#%*(((&^%$#%。52Please respect copyright.PENANABKFxiidjEQ
^*((&&^%$##@@@,#$%%^&&*(((*$###。52Please respect copyright.PENANA4pCccP6Vq3
@#$%^&&**(OO×,((*&^%%$$##…@#。52Please respect copyright.PENANAlVPoV6I0mU
&^%$#%^&(*&^%$,&)(*&^%$###%&*&。52Please respect copyright.PENANA3gpJa1FKnH
(悟空心領神會,學會72變。)52Please respect copyright.PENANAwDnCGTR2uU
(第3日,夜半3更,悟空準時為菩提祖師找便壺)52Please respect copyright.PENANAwfyoEeaoy4
菩提祖師:悟空,你會騰雲駕霧嗎?52Please respect copyright.PENANALj9YT20Wax
悟空:什麽是騰雲駕霧?52Please respect copyright.PENANANQP1323f25
菩提祖師:你會飛嗎?52Please respect copyright.PENANAO4nsez86ME
悟空:會。52Please respect copyright.PENANAnccBOCSg2U
菩提祖師:你飛給我看看。52Please respect copyright.PENANAmFhWgQraxG
悟空:我飛!我飛!我飛!……(在屋裏跳來跳去)52Please respect copyright.PENANAec22UwEMLp
菩提祖師:你這是飛還是跳啊?52Please respect copyright.PENANA9PnaB85HCM
悟空:屋裏的空間小,我只能跳給你看。52Please respect copyright.PENANAf8v7Cj0TE3
菩提祖師:我們去外面,你飛飛給我看。52Please respect copyright.PENANAmX9QIX04gG
悟空:師父,現在是半夜,我飛到空中怕撞到不明飛行物,更怕被外星人劫持。等天亮我飛給你看吧。52Please respect copyright.PENANAb87Sb2f9Vh
菩提祖師:有道理。52Please respect copyright.PENANAROAlNV1Dgc
(次日天亮,兩人來到洞外空曠之處)52Please respect copyright.PENANA27qpdBdk1u
菩提祖師:悟空,現在你可以放心的飛了。52Please respect copyright.PENANAumOYaWKpuS
悟空:我飛——!52Please respect copyright.PENANAa1YOZSAvFL
(悟空飛到半空,落回原地)52Please respect copyright.PENANAYFYk13n1B7
悟空:師父,我飛的怎樣?52Please respect copyright.PENANAkZ5hMRrGJD
菩提祖師:速度太慢!52Please respect copyright.PENANAafEk11anF4
悟空:弟子飛回地面很快,速度還慢?52Please respect copyright.PENANA6ckbPLxCmK
菩提祖師:我已經在這兒等你3天了!52Please respect copyright.PENANADIaZEGXGpA
悟空:啊!沒那麽誇張吧?52Please respect copyright.PENANAzlE2nkHFDs
菩提祖師:你現在神仙。做為神仙,飛,要做到朝遊四海暮蒼梧。52Please respect copyright.PENANApSc5R4dy9v
悟空:不解!52Please respect copyright.PENANApUnt1ttnGZ
菩提祖師:就是說,神仙從北面飛到南面、從南面又飛到西面、從西面又飛到東面、從東面又飛回北面,要在24小時內完成。52Please respect copyright.PENANAZGGLIn3lfB
悟空:那樣東西南北的飛很累吧?52Please respect copyright.PENANA68cc5WnqjS
菩提祖師:飛的速度快不累。52Please respect copyright.PENANAGYpGmC6DtS
悟空:怎麽飛速度就快了?52Please respect copyright.PENANA8U7A9JGjV6
菩提祖師:師父教你個頭跟雲!52Please respect copyright.PENANAF6P8zM60Lg
悟空:頭跟雲?52Please respect copyright.PENANAbQ5e7DjW93
菩提祖師:錯了,是跟頭雲!52Please respect copyright.PENANAuDhv9ySoni
悟空:速度有多快?52Please respect copyright.PENANA8LzjPtwleV
菩提祖師:翻一個跟頭能飛出十萬八千裏!52Please respect copyright.PENANAo62JvUtIvX
悟空:要手足顛倒的翻跟頭?52Please respect copyright.PENANAIxW92lT80A
菩提祖師:是滴!所以師父把跟頭雲說成了頭跟雲。52Please respect copyright.PENANAxbVQi6MKiL
悟空:一個跟頭飛出十萬八千裏,有沒有達到光速?52Please respect copyright.PENANAJWxGGbEfCX
菩提祖師:經為師精確計算,已經是超光速。52Please respect copyright.PENANApqf5e7Blh4
悟空:那麽高的速度,身體與空氣產生摩擦,身上會不會起火嗎?52Please respect copyright.PENANAit633J4cQn
菩提祖師:自身不會。52Please respect copyright.PENANAsmG6uvK2Em
悟空:太好了!如果帶一頭豬飛,就可以吃烤豬了。52Please respect copyright.PENANAl8djZeJb1S
菩提祖師:是啊!為師愛吃烤羊,經常帶一只羊飛。52Please respect copyright.PENANAcDTHVNXJM4
悟空:師父,快教弟子跟頭雲!弟子學會跟頭雲,要做的第一件事是讓你吃烤全羊!52Please respect copyright.PENANAv2qhnChmjI
菩提祖師:為師立刻傳你跟頭雲的飛行口訣。52Please respect copyright.PENANApYCtGWr3RS
%^$#@^^&*()_+!@#,*()_$#%*(((&^%$#%。52Please respect copyright.PENANAIOi9heuiGW
^*((&&^%$##@@@,#$%%^&&*(((*$###。52Please respect copyright.PENANAzAmLc5oA1e
@#$%^&&**(OO×,((*&^%%$$##…@#。52Please respect copyright.PENANASfUmyLgkCF
&^%$#%^&(*&^%$,&)(*&^%$###%&*&。52Please respect copyright.PENANAyWZL66ppvu
(悟空心領神會,又學會跟頭雲。)52Please respect copyright.PENANA4RjaeW3uYu
(某日,菩提祖師穩坐高壇,講經論道)52Please respect copyright.PENANAQwTw9nFEEt
菩提祖師:哎呀!疼死我了!52Please respect copyright.PENANAtGiNsAr9SO
悟空:師父?52Please respect copyright.PENANAuMh0XTvoA9
眾弟子:師父,怎麽了?52Please respect copyright.PENANAlS2TfrXuBF
(菩提祖師伸手從衣服裏抓出一只血淋淋的老鼠)52Please respect copyright.PENANAZsiU2TwhsO
悟空:我的進化鼠?52Please respect copyright.PENANAurubedcsjG
菩提祖師:悟空,你送我的這死耗子怎麽咬我?!52Please respect copyright.PENANARTDTTWvrDB
眾弟子:師父,你沒事吧?52Please respect copyright.PENANADLGo5iGT3N
菩提祖師:哎呀!疼死我了!快叫醫生!快叫醫生!52Please respect copyright.PENANAaeHEBV5FnB
悟空:師父,我的進化鼠沒鼠疫,咬你一口只是皮外傷。52Please respect copyright.PENANATac6D1Aw8Q
菩提祖師:是沒鼠疫,可它有毒!我現在中毒啦!52Please respect copyright.PENANA8DvLsIdP2p
悟空:意外。52Please respect copyright.PENANA1NGSjmPfAU
菩提祖師:仙童,把這只老鼠餵貓!(狠狠的把老鼠仍在地上)52Please respect copyright.PENANAvlFi9EMsh3
仙童:遵命。52Please respect copyright.PENANAkz84qWDj4Q
悟空:師父,這只進化鼠貓不敢吃。52Please respect copyright.PENANA9isYQzqvav
菩提祖師:我有一只進化貓,專吃進化鼠。52Please respect copyright.PENANAkODVX8a8jQ
悟空:啊!52Please respect copyright.PENANAdlTPKk6vTl
(喵~!一只貓跑來,一口把老鼠吃了!)52Please respect copyright.PENANAFjZrRHt9mB
悟空:鼠兄,我的鼠兄!你我兄弟情同手足,肝膽相照,沒想到今天你落個死無全屍、死無葬身之地!55555……(嚎啕大哭!)52Please respect copyright.PENANADkvUXesWqk
菩提祖師:孫悟空,今日你我師徒關系一刀兩斷!52Please respect copyright.PENANA1AhQhL3KIT
悟空:沒這麽嚴重吧?只是有毒的老鼠咬你一口。52Please respect copyright.PENANAxIUplcmgXI
菩提祖師:可那毒耗子這麽一咬,毀了我300年的道行!55555……52Please respect copyright.PENANAeu6gWQ1Woj
悟空:什嘛?!52Please respect copyright.PENANADjDzAFKytv
菩提祖師:悟空,為師不責罰你。你給為師一個深刻的教訓。從此以後,為師再也不養寵物了!52Please respect copyright.PENANAWaSwle9SUZ
悟空:我……52Please respect copyright.PENANAXMHmMHfRc9
菩提祖師:你已被逐出師門,回你的花果山去吧。52Please respect copyright.PENANArDvLEXgsDB
悟空(跪地流淚):師父,弟子還想給你老人家找便壺,為你老人家變便壺用。52Please respect copyright.PENANAbtcjdBpOGn
菩提祖師:你走吧,你走吧。52Please respect copyright.PENANAkn2aqSfIpI
悟空:弟子還等著師父改個好聽的名字……52Please respect copyright.PENANArkVYsQcjMv
菩提祖師:你走不走?再不走,我讓進化貓咬你的JJ。52Please respect copyright.PENANAt6aTa4ke5J
悟空:啊!我走,我走。52Please respect copyright.PENANAORVU4ySQie
菩提祖師:快走!52Please respect copyright.PENANATfeIlgcnR5
(悟空含淚拜別菩提祖師,一個跟頭飛向花果山)52Please respect copyright.PENANAFL6lgGgB9P
52Please respect copyright.PENANAprlkpmMXV2
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大話囍遊
作者:
刀鋒戰水

篇 #3
第03回 七十二變
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