同學們面面相覷。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLeF9JZ8LD
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUnCXIycRY

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZFOlQWqgn
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBIPUPR7Wm

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLJfvB1loL
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDVrrK8AcPo

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoPP19fhQPS
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmqEVaSCcY

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5SisPHR2E
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvriPXyyvz

「那改成老不羞好了。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1NQcIGbKH6
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXmUWrsTc3I

「更糟糕了啊！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypKNAzB4nS
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqcvrt90zK

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLphxPyXdi
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFDMQj0RVe

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHABNpHjp7N
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKQaTLt1ks1

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7FpnWQF4z
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCymqWSyKQO

「老師，它正在暖身。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSpa0SolpDy
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMhuwCKor1

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vekNVVqqN
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuoTk51MdX

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpyq2pW5uH
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6Ckeiz0FG

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfk5HvCpeuW
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahJqrpVNJF

「那我改姓三岐。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp0ieMXMmp7
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW30R6X0w1q

「才不是這個意思！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKpT7MbZXZ
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tuFnWH7ac

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXLF7m3egw
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOluM5lpIC

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XgYAxO9Jb
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsqapwjciRm

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQAlZLrJvgW
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lmxymi4oQ

「元帥好弱。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrC5k0acd81
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MFHsa8CdW

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGsn34ORcSu
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdHkSLLvRU

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3rRH6gnvX
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNyyhzOEZD

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCbJxKiAta
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZJ2oQztXK

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4hBfQtPEd
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡovSDVv9dyG
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJlPMUoFrNi

「老師！別中計啊！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgstgdGWNFY
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8mIz4SKA5

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXVjTBUYgP
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVY4FczGJ4i

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5izcm5QEO0
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdc5VU1cx73

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlOuyIcGml
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTldlHmgIX

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuDqE25KFq
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNIYofYASe

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgJBPiLy2H
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEesFTqggoP

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1YsIVzIEl
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNM13GyS2zV

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZzxi6g074
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyPaXWxK6u5

「什──」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwiWf0bXvrU
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNWdrumj8CZ

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQ9OGeRXz9
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGiX1mSKL0

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd4vg5sTbUn
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Kptm3vYPf

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF2w3D85dn7
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhdeuidJ7k

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQdbxe4IVW
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuUIsB3z0J

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk54kkL7dNF
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDzriywGL4

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPFDybm5IWC
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQxHqv23lhi

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibKrp06Mjt
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0HMQxZnMr6

    賴妍歪頭。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHxhzcsKMpn
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgkxZWd7H6

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7qedyf7VL
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc1vXPMIFmQ

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAATK3nXLn
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcEDSSdHbv

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtUgSRNAy2O
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOvgGlGLO3

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoF08PIrPdw
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJJy0LZcZI

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMLy0LsMyW
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvxDbIjHbN9

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjDESYsUsr
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlyJX4gvWHQ

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpX162t0yWJ
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK27kXx7L3b

「一加一等於二。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL8UHyXxNvv
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoaNZwPwVi

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFhsVFpNvW
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOLt4A9N0S

「……咦？」老師愣住了。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBbCYNkOHk
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgUksD391h

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GpmSxnpr3
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJfFgou0qzg

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnZBip3LoU0
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaoFIttlcJ

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN63BZb88J1
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoB3jy2OsJz

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQDCmsu9eE
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqsituMyPi8

    完蛋了。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQJa5qcHtO
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOdHVY98J4E

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjKVMM4ccdB
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDfLLauGQ5A

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJULYs5PcJ
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWqpp2OYTj

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5ixY9OAaA
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkKKmH7us1O

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIrm3VHedeB
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zBBImKUVJ

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QImZCIIxI
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZ774Lsr0g

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApq5jzgcnC
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRsU7dQnS7

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTL256akK9i
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ6Ddm7rOGc

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4MS9JjHO8a
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3p8SIaVi4

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5ktxKOhNU
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMspkFZZzWX

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uJT1LRgVf
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvrUIoJCLr

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZyFk0QWGBU
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY1EjwQXrXh

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3IWncy1MqS

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ11hPfsVa7w
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wO7JMNaZw

「同學！一加一等於多少！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡta6s08UPMI
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvHGw8EMdv

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoBY19hZAZ
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwQZZBN8ndn

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0vm2fd5Lfo
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsopM7SmRYy

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj0xXnbU7B9
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ngy9q5J2i

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyUoGuouFr
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14zkdtzQAR

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZMhMeu7f4
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsB7kmZpIfS

    全班盯著三岐。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFLZ6VPd4A
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBrXZtxT7DM

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQ155I40UK
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUyQ3QK4G9A

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6MBStEB5w
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDg6r7ufcaR

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYM8eAcjl9Y
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWMTQxhXzc

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzOGqnlLSKa
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21ngHP9htO
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當日結果：332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrxOL9iWlRs
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVyUjq1K6RY

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7JfNjifUC
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2IJLlZaWCO

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwDubLOqrfI
332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlyqJIwm26w

    柳困依然單身。332Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAiNrSWv1d