同學們面面相覷。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9j4NlfqSd0
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwaY4o6ZwG1

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxOHdID4xS
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2HR0eULsE

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4voWCYU9P
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufiKVlJOxa

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqe9L4VNHp7
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3y18OM0f4G

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH60jBrJeKR
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGszIayzC3

「那改成老不羞好了。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhh7osarLcr
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtZG99CzDn

「更糟糕了啊！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fa4FI586e
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4XALzP6Oe

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxWwJQtQAj
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMopYbJnUh

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpu6Q0ETIjO
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnZGgedcP0

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVHoftqA2K
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXkUuFLCpnX

「老師，它正在暖身。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaL19QEzvxj
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DRLfIb9s8

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLIiVwsd7d
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZjtHxYvbS

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2MHpghCzz
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSTRUv5yGjp

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCVXuKriBpd
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3UY0DhAlj7

「那我改姓三岐。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwwQDYY5Ct
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡik2nIj6pVq

「才不是這個意思！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRmmSjE82Mu
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqdlzk1B7x

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCIn80VXA2
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDkMIAXumoN

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz6sTt7jYYZ
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtcDAaIBg4

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5on7vtYeIc
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxKrylqOSQ2

「元帥好弱。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80Mam2zkBC
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPzZkalTxP

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGju83ZqU2y
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgpldjKVsb

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnqpiExi8Y
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlor5jrhmq

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvM4Ot59xAa
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7RkdV3cAQ

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmiaLhkTxj
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnILXAOXldB
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJfZY84jd2

「老師！別中計啊！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44YlbUNDB2
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGlxqlioGaz

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAC3q0jcq3
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46IWdDZd0u

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXP1hHO69W
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmF4ddcTCLe

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvFJfnjT4z
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcp6PSBTos7

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10MzaxmdQV
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzAwglUOXJ

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUD9WXSfQUK
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ11WR541kOv

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRl71rn5qRv
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRgD13YNwbw

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJRDda1aaq7
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1zS01Bs6K

「什──」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0KouW7RUwK
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlucTUEixYG

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCKo3CgGOf
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkboGz6cNTA

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvELdbw6Pvx
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1Y4Z0i9qF

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3ciXyQCGq
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RQmGFomnr

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVSE4K2Xdzt
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcemQdtLog

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrYYfmt6D5G
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLleFJCAZd

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcU8Z3sG5X
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl5ZkuJrDdF

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1c2qW5ZktD
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoCUr8YHxS

    賴妍歪頭。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZOwVi1LiY
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFlPplmE0r

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOgeU0bxr3
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2wybrD33SG

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTZgw7UMyg
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5T38TMuYLK

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXxqe1l4eX
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TV85DgjIA

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5o0WtVTc7
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRgx2FmKFY

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1P160tSTnC
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6LfgO8VEGV

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1hHKPdyNki
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9OiMQ9YLV

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARlbrjxyw5
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIVmnJxQrqX

「一加一等於二。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTZ3kEI2BH
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo8sW0NCQ6t

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqXIotjplH
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ73tkIrks3t

「……咦？」老師愣住了。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5y7qBbpS7
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zKsOCJOiu

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIHoTlLesiJ
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWuw5ILGnj

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXWocVSkgR
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMv7Szv6JK

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtlXj3bHTH
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZgiWUqJLc

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeML6EYvSy
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpf7Q1FRY2f

    完蛋了。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkL2cjWbe6x
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Htytal6oi

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPZdF7pVTB
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbgch7RiLn

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgqeWyPIUS
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5M12AyRBq

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ04Fggopn5V
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWAXqAZgZZ

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpn7PynzS7k
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXA74Udg9N

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjEjSSeecA
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqVoLI2FpQ

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJi97358HyR
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlBZXc5CABf

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzteKStflwT
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzrLvvZkyrG

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnJrWq6vrCh
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabLlCeoxmy

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCoiEIH3hj
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUD3aO1kTuz

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu3S0QYSAUW
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhmdx4AFGh

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1xdKBiHrW
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtakJNzIbVh

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmWWOiZBs0

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFVThcmobi
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdKNbTwH7X

「同學！一加一等於多少！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfhWsGRLUNV
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpqHfZUXq6l

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKTlKYtQzH
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FBeETwOPl

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxhmxzb8M7K
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcxlOgLSEeG

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnM2G0YnWam
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWsIaYpQzbA

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF22GSiSsRB
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBsr5eLoFA

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4Xsh44ByM
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS5y9Aombbz

    全班盯著三岐。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4wcQsWVaj9
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRK4yhDjfi

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdM6zGiDSa
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynckYHuLMS

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1Ndrcg3p0
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiBspV8AjSs

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMt4kEeEsu
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1azSu2EGg

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjtdecIqPKt
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxVfk45Btv
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當日結果：345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8cfHJkg8L
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9TVvj9lagH

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRxKKY9H05
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQdsvZulYr

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxULyAv7Gz
345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE12aA6XnRB

    柳困依然單身。345Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtJq450SqXb