《請跟我交往！拜託啦！》 - 第一章體育課！

大家好，我叫柳困，今年十七歲，是一個看似普通的正常高中生。

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不過，我卻擁有一個不尋常的秘密──我仍然保有前世的記憶。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCLi0j1vru
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不對，不只前世……就連前前世、前前前世、前前前前世都還記憶猶新。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42khuJQGJP
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問我為什麼？355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡefxIbcpaVd
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原因很簡單。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0yvownplq
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因為我是個單身狗。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGimjKtOs1
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在死後的世界，也就是「魂界」，神曾經立下一個規定：要談過戀愛，才能在轉生前消除前世的記憶。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpatxg2OwC
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「沒談過戀愛怎麼能算是活過啊？」那一天，神斜坐在王座上，興高采烈地宣布，「從今天開始，到死前還沒談過戀愛的，一律不准清除自己的記憶！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWGDaqMJIS
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從那之後，世間開始不時出現保留著前世記憶的神童，他們也都成功地在重生後談了場轟轟烈烈的戀愛，並在死後轉生前順利清除了自己的記憶。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYj2eDbGavU
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除了我以外。

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「喂，我說你啊，」在再次轉生到人間，成為柳困之前，神把我拉到魂界的角落，用責備但幸災樂禍的語氣對我說，「你要加油欸，你已經連續單身了十輩子了，學弟妹全都畢業了，就只剩你一個人還卡在這裡，不覺得羞恥嗎？」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGT1vhfigg
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「少囉唆！」我惱怒道，「妳也不想想到底是誰的問題！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX4WxcApJm8
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「哎呀哎呀，現在是怪我囉？」神擺出無辜的表情。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe4fWfUOJXM
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「這輩子！我這輩子一定會脫單的！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOYMYIE0n5
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「你上次也是這麼說。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjduzJbFcIh
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「閉嘴！才沒有！」我面紅耳赤，不等祂說完就直接跳進轉生之門。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Z3njLIepE
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在那之後的十六年後，我進入高中，開始體驗人生中的第十一次青春期。我準備好要應付戀愛這場激烈的戰爭，也希望自己能在這一次的青春期成功脫魯。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoePRmTUEBU
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這個想法，只持續到進入教室的那一刻，遇見「她」為止。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVuhHXBEsN
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「柳困！該起床了啊！」一陣衝擊襲向趴在桌上的我，我一個重心不穩隨著椅子整個人倒在教室冰涼的地板上。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcDrcyWzOo
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「妳搞什麼啊！」我抱怨，起身拍掉制服上沾到的灰塵，「現在不是還在午休時間嗎？」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡipyM0kisuL
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「才不是，這節是外堂課欸。」說話的是一位臉頰微微泛紅的女學生。她的右腳舉著，明顯就是剛把我踹下椅子的樣子。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡij0Syzlq2l
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我默默的翻白眼，但是沒有回嘴，避免招來一頓拳頭。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNatD7H4pH0
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我轉頭看了看四周，同學們都走光了，只剩下空蕩的桌椅。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXf2pGEDa8O
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「走囉，體育課。」女學生紅著臉帶頭走出教室，我則跟在她後面。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDVGDT2XR6t
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什麼？你說她看起來就像是對我有意思，問我為什麼不跟她交往就好了？355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt6kASdmNgn
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我們再次回到剛剛的話題。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYF5ki20WhM
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在高一時，我遇見了「她」。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjSf5GPcTF
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她有著一頭紫色的長直髮，看到人總是臉頰泛紅，一副害羞的表情，還擁有一個美麗的名字：賴妍。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYsGMlgdpW
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剛開始，全班的男學生都急著對賴妍獻殷勤，不過到了下學期的時候對她告白的人卻只剩下其他班的學生。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCVbzbbaOP
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原因很單純：因為這個人很恐怖。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Gwvks1Dr3
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恐怖到甚至被取了「瘋狗」這個外號。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ632Rrnx6md
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至於一天到晚臉頰泛紅的原因也不是因為「為了要操控他人」這種複雜的理由，而是因為「酒精」。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPiey5rP3uY
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賴妍是我在到目前為止的十一個人生裡面，見過唯一一個可以在午餐時間拿整瓶五十度烈酒配完白飯的女人。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6mHv6Oe09
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永遠沒人知道她喝醉之後下一件會做出什麼超乎常理的事。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgE759MMzq
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我們兩人快步走到操場，看見體育老師早就已經帶完操，放同學去打球了，所以我直接略過暖身，自己抓了一顆地上的籃球，走到籃球場練習投籃。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiV9DxQxXM
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「同學！」我投進第三球時，體育老師吹起哨子，「請不要在操場喝小米酒！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjd3RaHfE00
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我馬上轉頭，看見一旁換好體育服的賴妍把一隻腳放在長椅上，仰起頭抓著酒瓶猛灌。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgatRg3D4B

如果把背景換成公園，那她看起來就像一個普通的公園醉漢。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcasxW0NNx4
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但是這裡是學校啊！

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「可是老師，我在暖身欸。」賴妍把酒一口氣喝完然後發出「噗哈」的聲音，接著用手背豪氣的抹抹嘴，最後啐了一口痰在操場外的草皮上。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj8gxSfzNzz
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這不是完全就是公園裡的醉漢嗎！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkpIwAzy7W6
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「那邊那位同學！」體育老師又朝另一邊大喊，「請不要在體育課投擲燃燒瓶！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5feV7KoneF
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「可是老師，我在暖身耶。」手裡握著燃燒瓶正準備要丟的男同學停下動作。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1tCN9aIvW
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這貨的名字叫簡澄，不知為何，他對燃燒瓶有著近乎癡狂的異常執著，不論是何種問題、處境都會想使用燃燒瓶來解決。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGK7CYIzd6
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對他來說，世界上不存在他的燃燒瓶解決不了的事物。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAtCnOHD8hi
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有時候問題甚至還真的能夠解決，不過這只讓他變本加厲。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXD6EWxMkyG
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像是現在。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5lvutW9hE
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你根本是在幫其他同學暖身吧！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcWoG1VKIh
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你旁邊的女同學已經快要哭出來了啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3HyGoV8JZm
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體育老師也快來阻止一下他吧！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5zWg1OIvgG
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「那暖身完記得收起來喔。」體育老師又繼續回頭看他的閣樓雜誌。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPciTBz5AYU
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你這體育老師也太淡定了吧！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqW4VhIqdy
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至少先給我把閣樓雜誌收起來啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrYmYcZctv
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在簡澄下手之前，另一位男同學抓住了他的手腕。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVMBIeozps
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「住手吧，簡澄boy，這樣不cool喔。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2HpKyKqytK

男同學一手抓住簡澄，一手按在自己的臉上。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoY6ZQjABVQ
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「可惡，最麻煩的傢伙出現了…」簡澄低聲抱怨。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrWj1skRA9t
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「你的惡行，就由我冥界的魔之眷屬 · 暗爪的歐威爾，依你的行為施以制ㄘㄞ────」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOVc6DftTf
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「三岐，你的錢包掉了。」我走過去，撿起掉在暗爪的歐威爾身旁的錢包。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMA4avzIfa
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「……我不是三岐，我是鋼爪的歐威爾。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLair5xpjO
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「你剛剛說暗爪。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8pBPGBwstz
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「不，柳困boy，我很清楚我是誰，」他一手放在胸前，一手放在身後，雙腳交叉向我行禮。

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「我，是冥界的邪王 · 鋼爪的麥歐爾，出自於冥界的望族，進入人間是為了要拯救我的妹妹，也就是冥界的公主，鎖鏈的康妮。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ83u7YWUodG
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「你本來說歐威爾。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAlYxseLeyN
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「那、那是一時口誤……」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdLOoqhJ0e
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「你，」我嚴肅的對著他說，「根本不知道自己是誰對吧？」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeyUD8o2bFz
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「不…我不……」他按著額頭，露出痛苦的神色，在地上打滾。「不行……！『魂』…滾出我的腦海啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm3cwZzuai9
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「邪王好弱。」我發牢騷。話說回來，魂界也沒有邪王這種東西就是了。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaH074KYSq
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「這個給你，振作起來吧，」簡澄把手中的燃燒瓶遞給他，為他加油打氣，「你可沒有這麼容易倒下！因為……355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJx8c2QqAc
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「因為你可是……我的宿敵啊。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV7WQuW8m6H
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簡澄露出了豪氣的笑容，把手伸向在地上的三岐。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8YhdIzTdl
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三岐擦乾淚水，回握住簡澄的手，正準備從地上爬起的時候，「有沒有人～看到我的～瓶～～～～子～～～～～～～～～」被喝的爛醉的賴妍一腳踩在後腦。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rxUVggz2L
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「你不是說只要暖身嗎！」「被」趴在地上的三岐吐槽。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfwHcd9EqR
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「喔呀…？」賴妍往下一看，「早安啊三岐同學～在那裡玩會弄髒身體喔？」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gbOC2qgjc
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「妳先從我身上下來啊！」三岐掙扎。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSSJvLECLYs
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「喔喔喔喔！好像在玩衝浪喔！」賴妍努力維持平衡。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2BnlVWlA91
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「妳這是……在噗喔小看我身為暗印者的力量嗎……？」三岐說到一半還吃到土。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKhGFebLKB
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「衝浪了喔喔喔喔喔！」賴妍開心的大笑。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1iT6gxTrXO
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她根本就沒在聽啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAeLPYBHd3e
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「同學！」體育老師從看雜誌的姿勢抬頭，

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「不要霸凌有精神障礙的同學好嗎！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OnPbZwOFG
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他只是中二病還沒好而已啊！為什麼變成精神障礙了！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlBiRiMjqeM
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「可是老師你看三岐，」在賴妍腳下的三岐已經整張臉埋在土裡了，「他玩的很開心耶。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOdMXtrUyTQ
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「唔唔唔唔唔唔唔唔！」三岐口齒不清的哀嚎。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ01KZ3A1TFb
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「注意不要讓同學受傷喔。」體育老師繼續看閣樓雜誌。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRhbJzbIa5
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這已經不是受傷的問題了吧！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfVu4Qn9LYY
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOMjRaW9O68

所以說給我把雜誌收起來啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflQHBn1Eax
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjLrZIvEAN

「夠唔喔了吧！」臉不斷砸向地板的三岐好不容易擠出一句話。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PNu8e4jxK
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYV52UqpxJy

「…………」賴妍臉一僵，慢慢低頭，看著她腳底下不斷扭動的三岐。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXiDqqjliZ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MevrhGx8n

「我、我的衝浪板會說話…好噁心喔……」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlf30y9DLN
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7xmMHiMBX

她眼眶泛紅，吸了一次鼻子。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNrICbOOA1
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兩次。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKA45VrXz1
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「嗚嗚………………」賴妍開始不顧一切地大哭。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzAIt3lG28
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgrQ8pqegj

「三岐同學真壞。」

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「好糟糕喔。」

355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6lHyB0mZkD

「竟然害奇怪的東西哭了。」旁邊圍觀的同學們開始交頭接耳。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPM6Dr8QnrP
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZgDIAd7j5

說別人是奇怪的東西也太過份了吧！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPDC5esVNBO
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuBmKbAKPmH

「所以現在是我的問題囉！」三岐好不容易從嚎啕大哭的賴妍腳下逃開。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPCvsjDjQC
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaVdP3VueD

「喂！誰來安慰她一下啊！」一位男同學慌張的大喊。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeoSYqb7Qj
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrPfxbw4BDd

「我能讓他冷靜一下。」簡澄拿出燃燒瓶。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmeRzHfJ2Z
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9p3yqj5EAO

「你只是要讓她熱起來吧！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Xi1PKFNvl
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiszQwjFvgX

「被吾封印的眷屬呦，僅從吾之召喚───」三岐振振有詞。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Moe3ClbFM
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uaQGidPCo

「你是要安慰她還是收了她啊啊！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhj76ojTMgF
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bTw7Et5Fh

「收了她。」三岐露出一副理所當然的表情。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8Cn9Mo0bf
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNs8UYrvfFT

「你們根本是來亂的吧！」你們別亂搞，我等等還要收尾啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmbxvFoMci
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2s79ESmTZo

「年輕人們。」不知道何時走到我們旁邊的體育老師開口了，「就憑你們是無法解決這種毀滅性天災的。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5mt3Xylko
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLoN9aGh3a

「為什麼又從奇怪的東西變成毀滅性天災！」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfLcPbXGQi
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡns2FZVOwxf

「因為奇怪的東西放久了本來就會變成毀滅性天災。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGdyxxWTTtH
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKGhArODFY

我不是在問這個啊啊啊啊啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtllL5i9Vqd
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4IL7OCcGq

老師又開口說：「現在，我就讓你們看看，真正的『大人的辦法』。」355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgDOcfkYgo
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWotJZx5mM

「『大人的辦法』……」簡澄看著老師嚴肅的臉，吞了口口水。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPfksK4sXLL
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGzA0gxgT4

「賴妍同學。」他走到賴妍面前。賴妍因為震驚而暫時忘記了哭泣。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC6gNvAA76e
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqb9BFbsYZx

話說我們的體育老師是一位看上去年過四十的大叔，比班上所有除了我以外的同學都還要早經歷了傳說中的青春期，再加上已經在這所高中任職了十年以上，所以應該也有足夠的能力與經驗能解決這種事ㄑ────355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznT3nJUMVA
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「你看，這是丁丁。」他脫下褲子。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKAHigWWHJx
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5LN9Sx3Uuz

    是真正意義上的『讓你們看看』啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLY1FESPDN
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  當日結果：355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV0lE0A1D2K

賴妍平安無事（哭累了被女同學背回教室）。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCclcjr7Mtg
簡澄打電話報警，體育老師於上課中被警察抓走，兩人前往警局做筆錄。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLnIBtPVP6
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三岐臉部異常腫脹，被帶去了醫務室。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZ4nP1SvDN
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmeOFNHSz7

其他同學（包括柳困）於下一節正常上課。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6IBMVLDjdp
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtHfhcLrlC

柳困依然單身。

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