孫悟空降至花果山水簾洞，走路搖搖擺擺，全身帶著酒氣。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7G0lSMGMqs
悟空：小的們！我回來啦！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsSNyNYJO1
通背猿猴帶著一幫猴子歡呼圍上。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡacaYBaD1tU
通背猿猴：大王，你老人家可回來了！你這一去，100多年！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAh32LuM6Xk
悟空：啊。你怎麽計算的？我只離開半年。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67kCzI7lWG
通背猿猴：你忘啦，天上一天，地下一年。100多年前，我對你說過。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEOlTFihQHL
悟空：你半年前這麽說。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgVVdEi120
通背猿猴：我100多年前說的。你以後上天，記下天數，寫在紙上。在天數後加個「年」字，這個數字便是地上的年數。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡun0lIWmReA
悟空：有別的計算方法嗎？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8dWqpZpAhp
通背猿猴：你用筆，也可以把年先寫上。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE11SNur4c2
悟空：天數加年，2個我一塊寫。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjSJZMRhCz
通背猿猴：100多年沒見面，我們好想你！55555……（傷感地大哭）54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Q9QsbWOB6
悟空：想我想哭了？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hHcbsyIak
通背猿猴：嗯。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5Cq1PAWfY
悟空：額。（吐了一口）54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnuU1zThyaP
通背猿猴：大王，你怎麽了？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAvk9a4Q0S4
悟空：我也想你們！額。（又吐了一口）54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAiusJY7jRf
通背猿猴：哪不舒服？你在吐呢。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBgsOFwOAC3
悟空：沒。是我想你們想的，吐了。（又吐幾口）54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVxuAdk5alz
通背猿猴：你想我們挺多的！玉帝封你做齊天大聖沒？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8orPpDGgt
悟空：封了。在天宮舉行的冊封儀式，使我終生難忘。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAb7E8xtHmr
通背猿猴：大王，描述一下冊封儀式，怎樣？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLMsWUWRve
悟空：不了。我終生難忘的，我知道就行。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5a8RNDqeQY
通背猿猴：描述100多年前的事，回憶一下美好時光。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkirOdaE1PF
悟空：我累了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1VasQQaw8
撲騰一聲，孫悟空倒在地上。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRx6clvXjy4
通背猿猴：是醉了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSYvJKjltb
天宮。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHM3Qt5M3mT
靈霄殿上，玉帝的臥底土地，進見玉帝。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrjZeVwJEU
土地：陛下，蟠桃園又大又圓的仙桃，都被孫悟空偷吃了！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx7foKJtzIK
玉帝：啊！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfAPg79TBE
一會兒，太上老君進見玉帝。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0czlF4wmI
太上老君：陛下，我嘔心瀝血煉的九轉金丹，都被孫悟空偷吃了！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYB6ohns7Ty
玉帝：啊！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmG3lvBWEfr
又一會兒，王母進見玉帝。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMp9Qki1hRc
王母：陛下，我準備的蟠桃宴，弄了很多酒菜，都被孫悟空偷吃了！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqL6RvSIeRV
玉帝：孫悟空啊孫悟空，你這個吃貨！你敢偷吃我吃的東西？！孫悟空在哪？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8jIiILswL
太上老君：天宮的監視鏡顯示，孫悟空已返回花果山。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR8DVSPtcCp
玉帝：誰願下界捉拿吃貨孫悟空？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQqazbP3I2
托塔天王：我！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuUzkiGq0f8
哪咤：我！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbFf4fjYOb
巨靈神：我！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNNDJuZRle
玉帝：天王，又是你們3個。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQssQv0tqVU
托塔天王：這次可以加幾個。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYi6htOGpe
玉帝：我給你天兵10萬。記住，這次要給孫悟空一個群毆。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKC1Sl3pkV3
托塔天王：這麽多人群毆一個，要排隊掛號。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRBDYfc4ZP
玉帝：不能排隊，不能掛號。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFSqYSPJsdc
托塔天王：一定做到。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyvsehoyq4
李托塔、哪咤、巨靈神，帶天兵10萬，一路出師下界。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdE0E1CEWpk
路上。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ390GilUUIE
哪咤：父王，我們10多萬人，怎麽做到群毆一個？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswQgpAmMnq
托塔天王：簡單。10多萬人停在花果山上空，一起向下扔兵器。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4bUyGl8P4
巨靈神：太血腥了吧？花果山會血流成河。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySmP9YrHwn
托塔天王：下一場大雨沖洗幹凈了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxWj5BHLob
巨靈神：一場大雨能解決麽？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6hd5O570G
托塔天王：我看行。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScP6z4tKun
巨靈神：我看不行。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Nn32JuWyL
托塔天王：不行再下第二場、第三場，直到沖洗幹凈收場！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnt0cJVQ92
巨靈神：我看也行了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qeMf8LvDk
這一日，花果山陽光明媚，萬裏無雲。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQWqInvgwnW
孫悟空正在和眾猴飲酒狂歡。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZ3ktJYB0a
半空中，托塔天王、哪咤、巨靈神出現。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWSp6NpXR0
托塔天王：孫悟空！你偷吃仙桃、偷喝仙酒、偷吃仙丹。玉帝派我將你這個吃貨捉拿歸案！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnePKqzTMm7
悟空：又來捉我？上次捉我失敗，這次，你有沒有做好心理準備？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2LQj4o5Yi6
托塔天王：有。這次準備群毆你。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCr3UnyLut6
悟空：群毆？你們3個？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaszCdLfdxb
托塔天王：我還有10萬天兵斷後。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9U7eVKg9me
悟空：總共10萬多3人？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm12oYUCP7n
托塔天王：人多也能群毆你！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1a3Y2Ye62B
悟空：失敗，失敗。我這花果山上上下下，也是10萬人多出3個。這次，只能1對1單挑。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtKW7rckWl
托塔天王：啊！是嗎？這可怎麽辦？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLp95FVfu7y
巨靈神：天王，我們按原計劃開戰吧。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb67HX20ojH
托塔天王：不能！敵我雙方的人數對等，不能群毆。開戰，違抗玉帝旨意。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUjjwMFJ0ZB
哪咤：父王，我向玉帝請求支援。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf437R2ZnTI
托塔天王：快。我先做好群毆準備，圍住花果山。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOi0XI26A2R
花果山上空，集聚10萬天兵，遮住太陽，天黑了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrX1HKTIIUs
眾猴：大王，我們害怕。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiqUIY9BsO
悟空：天黑怕什麽？來人，掌燈。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0aQWJr0ZT2
頓時，花果山上萬家燈火。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC0RkDlRZyS
哪咤返回天宮，在南天門遇見玉帝。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyj49xG0N8s
玉帝十分關心花果山戰況，正和群臣在南天門觀戰。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUgZIm3BUiP
哪咤：陛下！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmHtVDm6gHb
玉帝：3太子，前方戰事如何？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5enjlzEdP
哪咤：急需增兵。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgl3vdgxrf
玉帝：10萬兵力也不夠？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8HTzYnbK4
哪咤：孫悟空的兵力也是10萬，不能群毆。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZM8oSMsZw
玉帝：啊！天宮的總兵力只有10萬。諸位仙臣，這可咋辦？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡciGqqSNEt8
突然，一道霞光閃過，南海觀世音路過。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLl09JOcnw
觀音：諸位好！我們一起參加蟠桃宴會吧？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhpuDqzrAO
王母：蟠桃宴會的飯菜，被下界一個叫孫悟空的猴子偷吃了！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlnATQZmRSU
觀音：陛下，真的麽？求證一下。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjhr6q2bij4
玉帝：真的。我後悔，當初多花錢、多招兵買馬，多好。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzsrzGndpkb
觀音：孫悟空很厲害麽？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcXDY40gFJL
玉帝：那猴子偷吃仙桃、偷吃仙丹、偷喝仙酒，是一個擁有兵力10萬之多，很厲害的一個吃貨！觀愛卿，你可有法子對付？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFR72IPV0pr
觀音：我推薦一位。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXoZ8WSTLm
玉帝：直說。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBdWyLNX4St
觀音：二郎神。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4MZfd8zPX
玉帝：2——郎神？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡocgDPs3pgt
觀音：二郎神現居灌江口，享受下方香火，他也是一個吃貨。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNNlUwECE9
玉帝：行麽？聽到2我擔心。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLgUQQNbOp
觀音：放心。你別忘了，一貨擒一貨。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlx56Uq7VMc
玉帝：他還是2貨吧。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdqQilsgkVy
觀音：二郎神可以一抵萬！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypHlOhowlb
玉帝：好！增兵一萬，宣2郎神迎戰孫悟空。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTRSbjYhvVS
哪咤帶著二郎神，見到托塔天王。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSK3F2HmNFJ
哪咤：增兵到。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgHVkwssgje
托塔天王：增兵多少？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzoTbjdtxj
哪咤：一萬。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurVf5R4tYJ
托塔天王：在哪？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZd2uMk9KP
二郎神：我。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSH5NZ1blu
托塔天王：怎麽帶來一個人？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3p2M04VZ7x
哪咤：父王，觀音和玉帝都說，他可以以一抵萬。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyq6c8FAB4
托塔天王：超兵一萬，夠群毆了。天兵聽令，舉起你們手中的兵器，群毆開始。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5d8hSCR5Z6
二郎神：慢。聽說孫悟空和我一樣，都是吃貨。在群毆之前，我想單獨和孫悟空交流一下。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2Nhs1R2xQ
托塔天王：你交流快點。手舉著兵器，挺累的。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9eyDlBUB3
相貌清俊、秀氣的二郎神，手拿三尖兩刃槍，步伐輕盈的走在花果山上。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHY16dc1Qr9
眾猴：好帥喔！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡombWovl7J1
悟空：帥哥，你哪位？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpVUXwOnEV
二郎神：我是號稱以一抵萬的灌江口吃貨……54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKc34EAyhh
悟空：同吃，同吃。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7TPY5wMGp
二郎神：帥氣稱霸一方，至今還單身、還沒經歷初戀、還是處男的二郎神！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1FKDvEvKFQ
悟空：沒感覺。我男的。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJzpGhHaXy
二郎神一轉身，不知從那拿出一朵花，含在嘴裏。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9ZuddhsMD
悟空：說了沒感覺，你擺Pose也沒用。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurBAD5XBbE
二郎神：知道這是什麽花？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmhxFlbOzZ
悟空：鮮花。我這花果山多的是。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFB4GzdjFYN
二郎神：錯！這是一朵只在冬天盛開的梅花。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF1niKqRnzX
悟空：喔。這種花，花果山可沒有。你那多不多？我打算移植到花果山。等花果山上下雪，我想身臨其境「墻角樹枝美，唯有暗香來」的詩境。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAsdZPdm5X
二郎神：知道這是什麽神器麽？（手指自己的兵器）54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIGUJ2KFH1
悟空：怪怪的。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSuIsz8XMZE
二郎神：這是上古神器——三尖兩刃槍。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdb1Q4ywRfq
悟空：三刃兩尖槍？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5CRUwRXke
二郎神：三尖兩刃槍。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7fXtkxeuY
悟空：幹脆簡稱三尖槍，聽到這麽憋口的武器名字，沒心情和你打了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1iHzQhYYX
二郎神：誰說和你打？我只想在群毆前，會會你。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqanVDxXuGk
悟空：多你一個，也看不出群毆的效果。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO4GoaR9bdp
二郎神：我可是以一抵萬。多我一個，等於多了一萬人。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6E01R3FXOZ
悟空：好吧。這次天宮對我群毆的挑戰，我接受。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvQXF5dfx6
二郎神：等著群毆吧你！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9C0RMoebj
悟空：現在還沒開始，你我先過幾招，預熱一下，咋樣？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGYd56thGff
二郎神：現在10萬人圍著花果山，你不覺得熱嗎？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5bZfZciUQ
悟空：我有點缺氧。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMGCPxCkC4
二郎神：同感。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tYUQ44qg2
孫悟空和二郎神開始做深呼吸。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZGxYKNhXM
悟空：我還沒和處男打過，你和我打一場，破破我的處吧。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZDBOJgt5Q
二郎神：不打。等天上的兵器扔你。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5HeRpzbH3
悟空：你一個人打敗我，拿個頭等功。知名度一提高，會吸引很多美女。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH63zOwOrP3
二郎神：開打。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Y6rL6WoNx
兩個人的兵器一碰，三尖槍斷了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoVJdBMzX6K
二郎神：啊！我的神器！55555……（大哭）54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfipZ1RlZ4
悟空：什麽神器，不堪一擊。要麽是次品，要麽是膺品，要麽是仿品。不要為它難過了。回家找個不是奸商的鐵匠，重新打造一件。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡytpic3J8DQ
二郎神：我的真是上古神器。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡId518QkRAl
悟空：是麽？我這根棍子，是上上古的神器，你的材質沒我的好。不要為它難過了。回家買件上上上古的，肯定比我的好。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGDnWlTpsNY
二郎神：我要為我的神器報仇！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvO1ogyhoq
悟空：你回家買一件再說。過幾天，我約你再戰。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡweJyErPrzy
二郎神：我還帶著一件上古神器呢。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDCjLqZOj4
悟空：留著吧，別斷了再傷心。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm9QgkMJK7r
二郎神把2指頭伸進嘴裏，吹了一聲口哨。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2pTYljPd8f
悟空：這也算神器？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFi5FNP9P3
口哨一吹，不知從那冒出一條狗，在孫悟空腿上咬了一口。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡruak67LbN8
悟空：疼死我了！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMV1N558nQv
二郎神：哈哈哈。這是我的第二件神器——上古神犬。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl8fRAbqqai
悟空：有沒有狂犬病？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQ6sYqBCkp
二郎神：不確定。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qrtaMfzCp
悟空：來人！我要看醫生！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlEKJHOLGZm
南天門的大門口。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3XeLE6VEg
觀音：孫悟空被二郎神打傷了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKObZxgj5I
玉帝：貌似不是2郎神傷的。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkeIZS6Mvd9
太上老君：陛下，我可助二郎神一臂之力。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxhkRmA5Y4
玉帝：你也養狗？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡey9hncCskL
太上老君：我沒養狗，但我有一個套狗的金剛圈。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCoUC8zdQme
玉帝：能套猴子嗎？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRfk2ApR1n
太上老君：都是動物，應該可以。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNiNEeTVg7
說著，老君拿出金剛圈，瞄準孫悟空，把金剛圈發射出去。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAguuVs41vi
孫悟空還在忍痛求救，沒註意天上掉下東西，被金剛圈砸中頭部，暈倒了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZTZod7EhuL
二郎神叫來托塔天王，將其繩索捆綁，返回天宮。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj0mLJMEJlg
孫悟空被天兵押到斬妖臺，玉帝率眾觀斬。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3TSGx3L95o
玉帝：孫悟空，沒想到，你怕狗。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPU5w0y7nRW
悟空：剛才，是誰扔磚砸我頭的？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL0MQuVy3sP
太上老君：不是磚，是金剛圈。你恨我吧？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx6v98RKWFd
悟空：謝謝你！我被你的金剛圈點穴，止住大動脈，控製了狂犬病毒在我體內的擴散。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwW8i2lxDUP
太上老君：啊。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtNqYt5oN5
悟空：諸位，我被狗咬了。和我保持一定距離，小心狂犬病。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrsTK3FuSk
玉帝：開斬！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokHxrfuVhk
悟空：等等。我是仙不是妖，不能在斬妖臺斬我。求換地方。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHoIJNWN3cF
玉帝：換什麽地方。把「妖」改成「仙」，筆墨伺候。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCsWfiDgtn
在斬妖仙臺，孫悟空被刀砍斧剁，火燒雷擊。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjZhn1055Z
悟空：我死了沒有？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJR2CAWb8bU
玉帝：啊！怎麽還不死？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA5M6w4tq1n
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空偷吃仙界食物，已是金剛之身，殺他的方法不對啊。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkuArPy5W5x
玉帝：咋辦？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUhHEYdWIA
太上老君：把孫悟空放進我的八卦爐，扣緊蓋子，煉上7749天，他化成金水，能煉出金子。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTbdr6ka5Y
玉帝：太好啦！煉出金子，可以招兵買馬。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmbNzmYgekY
孫悟空被天兵押到兜率宮。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIAFR1kCC41
太上老君：把孫悟空推進八卦爐。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEnkj0YIYP4
悟空：真要把我煉成黃金？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ9ZdYfNp6p
太上老君：玉帝急需用錢。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODywtE6iNU
悟空：這裏有沒有浴池？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8G6m6oloG
太上老君：想幹嘛？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJx6eGXjmqY
悟空：我想脫掉衣服，洗洗澡，去趟廁所。可以確保煉出黃金的含金率在99.9999999%以上。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmnx7ldRuyW
太上老君：放心的進去吧！我這爐子煉成的黃金，都是100%的純度。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCflB8MwiZr
悟空：需要煉我多久？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxtHxFcaz9
太上老君：7749天。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVg2IzwqoT
悟空：盡量快些。我很想體驗一下，變成黃金的感覺。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYYoA8qEWB
1天，2天，3天………7749天後。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEIK8rgl3Y8
太上老君：開爐！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGdvMStSAA
老君探頭向爐中一看，看到2個圓圓的、閃閃發光的東西。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa495HgIqYP
太上老君：哈哈！孫悟空被煉成金蛋啦！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHT2zC67Mzx
說著，伸手去拿金蛋。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDFD729dzq
只聽爐內「哎呀」一聲！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc09AN83Zkg
爐內：誰插我？誰插我？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBeki74fbH
太上老君：我的金蛋！我的金蛋！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVx3luod6NU
爐內：哪個王八蛋插我？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUC3zs1yEx7
呼！孫悟空從爐內跳出來。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0iX90ElyW
悟空：哪個王八蛋插我眼睛？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxAKt9p2gX
這時，老君才看清楚，發光的2個金蛋，是孫悟空的2只眼睛。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9Ka5wdm6O
太上老君：孫悟空，你怎麽還沒死？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvBdNXTKvJ
悟空：我也想知道。我怎麽還沒變黃金？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbairj3F3T
太上老君：你的眼睛已變成黃金。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFs4rvLxyP
悟空：多謝了。我的眼睛已經變成火眼金睛！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1l2U0IBnlf
太上老君：有什麽了不起。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpSEhUWpNE
突然，老君的衣服起火。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Uil2GHS8Y
太上老君：啊！孫悟空，不要用你的眼睛看我！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0W3TxTURgN
兜率宮內，孫悟空眼睛看到的地方，急速起火。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9IINkM7FqI
太上老君極速報知靈霄殿的玉帝。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe7k1dTmVFX
太上老君：陛下，備水！備水！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoRX2thcl5t
玉帝剛好喝下一口茶，看到老君衣服冒火，嘴裏一噴水，火滅了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbePnsO4F24
玉帝：老君，你煉金小心點。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJy2KmIt4j5
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空從火爐逃出，還煉成一對火眼金睛，看到什麽就使什麽著火！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDM39SGjIl
眾仙：啊！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBeaRCPMvvN
玉帝：怕什麽。來人，放狗！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQZiDqMmtu
剛說完，孫悟空來了。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrTLLiwYU8
悟空：玉帝，狗在我這。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8JoHSBIzQj
玉帝一看，孫悟空用火眼金睛，正在烤一只狗。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7suZFh6Bp
玉帝：啊！護駕！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKWSd1VOmL
眾仙神護住玉帝。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJxxhaD4XTh
悟空：別緊張。等會兒大家一起吃燒烤。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjjitroYlk
一會兒，靈霄殿上，到處是火。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ542xXHXltk
玉帝和太白金星躲在一張桌子下，一杯一杯的不停向身上倒水。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuc8NcuUyFG
玉帝：愛卿，快幫朕想想辦法。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJBPxRgvlO
太白金星：陛下，聽說西方雷音寺的主持如來，有一坐騎是一條狗，很厲害。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCEJXXjefD
玉帝：他哪是啥狗？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rYEoMD0Vw
太白金星：好像叫佛獒。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6vfGlW5fH
玉帝：速請西方如來！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBl0iFF1fL8
如來騎著佛獒，從靈山雷音寺趕來。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6NbgbZA3C
悟空：你哪位？愛吃燒烤嗎？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwV4EGrfZr
如來：我是西方極樂世界釋迦牟尼尊者，南無阿彌陀佛。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjujFFpv6Zm
悟空：歡迎！一只狗不夠吃，你的這條狗，能不能貢獻一下？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhbm6K1LWX5
如來：孫悟空，狗是人類最好的朋友。很多人反對、反感吃狗肉，你怎麽一點也不愛護動物？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEbDj5hbEhm
悟空：難道你愛護動物？整天騎著狗亂逛，你願意被人騎著亂逛啊？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTmoPGCb01k
如來：額。。。我這條狗名叫佛獒，很兇猛。我騎著它，是防止它咬人。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfsSBbc35m
悟空：防止咬人還會咬人。吃進肚子，省心看管，絕不咬人。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8F7JF9tXG9
如來：我這條狗，可不好吃！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQkmUuzY7B
悟空：調料放全，好吃的很。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvNrywkcNd
如來：我先讓你吃一小塊。難吃，你別吃它，留它一條性命。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYX0Ic0hao1
悟空：先來一條狗腿。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSz5DhUVlbu
如來：我先給你一只狗掌吧。接著！54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypSzRecO06
如來投給孫悟空一只狗掌。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx52YuqOATh
悟空接住狗掌，發現狗掌上有一串字——唵嘜呢叭嘧吽。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyVT4zg8kd
悟空：你還會微雕？54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjJggIPhHak
突然，狗掌越變越大、越變越大……54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhFRikIgPt
悟空：這麽大，我可吃不完。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvUjbVtzUzC
狗掌化作金木水火土五座聯山，喚名五行山，墜落在地球，重重的把孫悟空壓住。54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaF9xhys8In
54Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtXn7nYlNBC
大話囍遊
作者:
刀鋒戰水
刀鋒戰水
篇 #11
第11回 大鬧天宮
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