孫悟空降至花果山水簾洞，走路搖搖擺擺，全身帶著酒氣。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07AFEXyrIn
悟空：小的們！我回來啦！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCDoLG2NzW
通背猿猴帶著一幫猴子歡呼圍上。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ6VFBBGO8k
通背猿猴：大王，你老人家可回來了！你這一去，100多年！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7QaK5RXqY
悟空：啊。你怎麽計算的？我只離開半年。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftB42arJ6d
通背猿猴：你忘啦，天上一天，地下一年。100多年前，我對你說過。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeG0kRBuaRf
悟空：你半年前這麽說。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAtlLgzvll
通背猿猴：我100多年前說的。你以後上天，記下天數，寫在紙上。在天數後加個「年」字，這個數字便是地上的年數。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrJYhbJri2j
悟空：有別的計算方法嗎？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwGh5difRT
通背猿猴：你用筆，也可以把年先寫上。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZXouhxcDy
悟空：天數加年，2個我一塊寫。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeHyTtpi2I
通背猿猴：100多年沒見面，我們好想你！55555……（傷感地大哭）68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXSU9acH4u
悟空：想我想哭了？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjGsKCKeVO
通背猿猴：嗯。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvVRNcoxiK
悟空：額。（吐了一口）68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDSZdnuMtgN
通背猿猴：大王，你怎麽了？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfIaIQFYi7
悟空：我也想你們！額。（又吐了一口）68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFZzi5unzY
通背猿猴：哪不舒服？你在吐呢。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡthnxB0KXtL
悟空：沒。是我想你們想的，吐了。（又吐幾口）68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSohQ7fm6v
通背猿猴：你想我們挺多的！玉帝封你做齊天大聖沒？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGcU4fyExF
悟空：封了。在天宮舉行的冊封儀式，使我終生難忘。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4XU2PVrLB3
通背猿猴：大王，描述一下冊封儀式，怎樣？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5EnmoBWfTt
悟空：不了。我終生難忘的，我知道就行。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwyeyScsvm
通背猿猴：描述100多年前的事，回憶一下美好時光。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOZAUS8d4R
悟空：我累了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkrTyM6bPR4
撲騰一聲，孫悟空倒在地上。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeXjEqICYj
通背猿猴：是醉了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN002Xu5TG5
天宮。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPck31AEVi
靈霄殿上，玉帝的臥底土地，進見玉帝。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9P1adC2rz
土地：陛下，蟠桃園又大又圓的仙桃，都被孫悟空偷吃了！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoudL35oVq
玉帝：啊！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdiVMAsC220
一會兒，太上老君進見玉帝。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4F8uVCn5m1
太上老君：陛下，我嘔心瀝血煉的九轉金丹，都被孫悟空偷吃了！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJrtcBbaYe
玉帝：啊！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvefgKD8Bb7
又一會兒，王母進見玉帝。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJw81gOYen
王母：陛下，我準備的蟠桃宴，弄了很多酒菜，都被孫悟空偷吃了！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaFBCoYDLUR
玉帝：孫悟空啊孫悟空，你這個吃貨！你敢偷吃我吃的東西？！孫悟空在哪？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKDNbmdxs8M
太上老君：天宮的監視鏡顯示，孫悟空已返回花果山。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERSMVDQHSZ
玉帝：誰願下界捉拿吃貨孫悟空？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3WwKhO5fx
托塔天王：我！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36wgBGTNB4
哪咤：我！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnetat0v0Ro
巨靈神：我！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5xwNmu5pp5
玉帝：天王，又是你們3個。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ir3snvtPT
托塔天王：這次可以加幾個。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6KXmk32o9
玉帝：我給你天兵10萬。記住，這次要給孫悟空一個群毆。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqH78QQNl66
托塔天王：這麽多人群毆一個，要排隊掛號。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJuQz3Xy7MD
玉帝：不能排隊，不能掛號。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOvqFZd4k1d
托塔天王：一定做到。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYtXrbc1PL
李托塔、哪咤、巨靈神，帶天兵10萬，一路出師下界。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXGg4Ux5kk
路上。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyMztYgaNHS
哪咤：父王，我們10多萬人，怎麽做到群毆一個？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6IxoSjzTLv
托塔天王：簡單。10多萬人停在花果山上空，一起向下扔兵器。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6koeIvjqy5
巨靈神：太血腥了吧？花果山會血流成河。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UIbPgUlRb
托塔天王：下一場大雨沖洗幹凈了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLUWTH5X5L
巨靈神：一場大雨能解決麽？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNfz8tRmFa
托塔天王：我看行。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxSxF3oNgp
巨靈神：我看不行。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBnqEOHLPt
托塔天王：不行再下第二場、第三場，直到沖洗幹凈收場！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGr1DK9Inr1
巨靈神：我看也行了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFk56eDJuG3
這一日，花果山陽光明媚，萬裏無雲。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcP7fziuhVf
孫悟空正在和眾猴飲酒狂歡。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqiKYY6tXT
半空中，托塔天王、哪咤、巨靈神出現。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEkLaRJa1ET
托塔天王：孫悟空！你偷吃仙桃、偷喝仙酒、偷吃仙丹。玉帝派我將你這個吃貨捉拿歸案！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEAcb2N9M7
悟空：又來捉我？上次捉我失敗，這次，你有沒有做好心理準備？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVYnGjrZGHj
托塔天王：有。這次準備群毆你。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUilazIAOvy
悟空：群毆？你們3個？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoloLM0O1h
托塔天王：我還有10萬天兵斷後。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQEwwuVDEf
悟空：總共10萬多3人？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9FxL4KZYY
托塔天王：人多也能群毆你！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztAxAVxFFq
悟空：失敗，失敗。我這花果山上上下下，也是10萬人多出3個。這次，只能1對1單挑。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJaslwCEPH
托塔天王：啊！是嗎？這可怎麽辦？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDWLwTkUXg
巨靈神：天王，我們按原計劃開戰吧。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZYMwB6zHb
托塔天王：不能！敵我雙方的人數對等，不能群毆。開戰，違抗玉帝旨意。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVgb8INGCUS
哪咤：父王，我向玉帝請求支援。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxat9TuQY6j
托塔天王：快。我先做好群毆準備，圍住花果山。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnRro5d5Da
花果山上空，集聚10萬天兵，遮住太陽，天黑了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZNYoWYMyK
眾猴：大王，我們害怕。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMAK2O0zjVZ
悟空：天黑怕什麽？來人，掌燈。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0bFKpY9Hh6
頓時，花果山上萬家燈火。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyA2llHBWdM
哪咤返回天宮，在南天門遇見玉帝。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWDGI7VNZm5
玉帝十分關心花果山戰況，正和群臣在南天門觀戰。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBa1pW08oO
哪咤：陛下！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAzt7sAm84
玉帝：3太子，前方戰事如何？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ltWHFtHHY
哪咤：急需增兵。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsMBWfowP0o
玉帝：10萬兵力也不夠？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPMbZS9Hm7
哪咤：孫悟空的兵力也是10萬，不能群毆。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ3NmpAI5Fo
玉帝：啊！天宮的總兵力只有10萬。諸位仙臣，這可咋辦？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8QT2FxLeN
突然，一道霞光閃過，南海觀世音路過。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkhLkC4EBUI
觀音：諸位好！我們一起參加蟠桃宴會吧？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ95PM1525S
王母：蟠桃宴會的飯菜，被下界一個叫孫悟空的猴子偷吃了！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZJQkSzVhk
觀音：陛下，真的麽？求證一下。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq210KxEW2Y
玉帝：真的。我後悔，當初多花錢、多招兵買馬，多好。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLFQw9GLdQ
觀音：孫悟空很厲害麽？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ91U1Amb2Dc
玉帝：那猴子偷吃仙桃、偷吃仙丹、偷喝仙酒，是一個擁有兵力10萬之多，很厲害的一個吃貨！觀愛卿，你可有法子對付？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQwYxxj1hS
觀音：我推薦一位。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqhqk5Xwcg
玉帝：直說。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JXPxer4x6
觀音：二郎神。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡws5W3HG0Eu
玉帝：2——郎神？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLXnzQkdPCz
觀音：二郎神現居灌江口，享受下方香火，他也是一個吃貨。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1nvjOeV1J
玉帝：行麽？聽到2我擔心。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoBsc8feLKm
觀音：放心。你別忘了，一貨擒一貨。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8TenY5if8
玉帝：他還是2貨吧。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMDJDLgDvxN
觀音：二郎神可以一抵萬！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqAyfcp8JAp
玉帝：好！增兵一萬，宣2郎神迎戰孫悟空。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOUjJsshMEQ
哪咤帶著二郎神，見到托塔天王。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwTv2OTLE8
哪咤：增兵到。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZRgKMeRoF
托塔天王：增兵多少？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJvykiVzX3
哪咤：一萬。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EttCoT4DU
托塔天王：在哪？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj46ussUUkS
二郎神：我。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ37MPxeXOJk
托塔天王：怎麽帶來一個人？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCirujUmXrK
哪咤：父王，觀音和玉帝都說，他可以以一抵萬。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6X6KZ4k1PR
托塔天王：超兵一萬，夠群毆了。天兵聽令，舉起你們手中的兵器，群毆開始。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbtMMzMQsCP
二郎神：慢。聽說孫悟空和我一樣，都是吃貨。在群毆之前，我想單獨和孫悟空交流一下。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0RonCdw8a
托塔天王：你交流快點。手舉著兵器，挺累的。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb27hLEd9Zw
相貌清俊、秀氣的二郎神，手拿三尖兩刃槍，步伐輕盈的走在花果山上。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBVfcvVL3m
眾猴：好帥喔！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCQZN4XzOz
悟空：帥哥，你哪位？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qS4BLmP4W
二郎神：我是號稱以一抵萬的灌江口吃貨……68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIyy8KlKy7j
悟空：同吃，同吃。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡarAMHZH1oO
二郎神：帥氣稱霸一方，至今還單身、還沒經歷初戀、還是處男的二郎神！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXawnZK63dK
悟空：沒感覺。我男的。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6eE684GAn
二郎神一轉身，不知從那拿出一朵花，含在嘴裏。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsCO7s0LcR
悟空：說了沒感覺，你擺Pose也沒用。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUiBdfKeSHE
二郎神：知道這是什麽花？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUaCiPxsY53
悟空：鮮花。我這花果山多的是。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2hSZ2y38h
二郎神：錯！這是一朵只在冬天盛開的梅花。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyN9njyW6Gp
悟空：喔。這種花，花果山可沒有。你那多不多？我打算移植到花果山。等花果山上下雪，我想身臨其境「墻角樹枝美，唯有暗香來」的詩境。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡShjhcmHWSy
二郎神：知道這是什麽神器麽？（手指自己的兵器）68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWjtaG0VHS
悟空：怪怪的。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWmdOdZxXn
二郎神：這是上古神器——三尖兩刃槍。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZYAO7chuFM
悟空：三刃兩尖槍？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGyzHvbrC8Z
二郎神：三尖兩刃槍。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtwuZ2Kf2TG
悟空：幹脆簡稱三尖槍，聽到這麽憋口的武器名字，沒心情和你打了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5x7cdvNRjM
二郎神：誰說和你打？我只想在群毆前，會會你。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wVeIkNjio
悟空：多你一個，也看不出群毆的效果。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ02XmN5zXii
二郎神：我可是以一抵萬。多我一個，等於多了一萬人。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgrWJzl7KT
悟空：好吧。這次天宮對我群毆的挑戰，我接受。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfKV6hvmtLp
二郎神：等著群毆吧你！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbqM1i8KmN
悟空：現在還沒開始，你我先過幾招，預熱一下，咋樣？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsLTi4g49uv
二郎神：現在10萬人圍著花果山，你不覺得熱嗎？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxz1oLTlSJ
悟空：我有點缺氧。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dL5xkdX7c
二郎神：同感。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUZ7Ysvijb
孫悟空和二郎神開始做深呼吸。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfHbbmK8Hg
悟空：我還沒和處男打過，你和我打一場，破破我的處吧。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWfc3sMwXe
二郎神：不打。等天上的兵器扔你。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡap7VRElIaY
悟空：你一個人打敗我，拿個頭等功。知名度一提高，會吸引很多美女。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7XYHwftg8c
二郎神：開打。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Aqkl2Bw7g
兩個人的兵器一碰，三尖槍斷了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1v2KJmzYG6
二郎神：啊！我的神器！55555……（大哭）68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLYyJvxr1Gn
悟空：什麽神器，不堪一擊。要麽是次品，要麽是膺品，要麽是仿品。不要為它難過了。回家找個不是奸商的鐵匠，重新打造一件。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCKeDIp7sa
二郎神：我的真是上古神器。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcVuK03vAi
悟空：是麽？我這根棍子，是上上古的神器，你的材質沒我的好。不要為它難過了。回家買件上上上古的，肯定比我的好。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZUneN2fVPk
二郎神：我要為我的神器報仇！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGWXBNLr5I
悟空：你回家買一件再說。過幾天，我約你再戰。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJjdmzawR2I
二郎神：我還帶著一件上古神器呢。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA0vsyQtm3s
悟空：留著吧，別斷了再傷心。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8j7BUKHlLK
二郎神把2指頭伸進嘴裏，吹了一聲口哨。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCZP6ixoUy
悟空：這也算神器？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcadFPYRTN
口哨一吹，不知從那冒出一條狗，在孫悟空腿上咬了一口。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXESScXBMb
悟空：疼死我了！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbsA3RLOlr
二郎神：哈哈哈。這是我的第二件神器——上古神犬。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDcJCe7oYz
悟空：有沒有狂犬病？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxdR6mqo2L
二郎神：不確定。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlcaNKvusbS
悟空：來人！我要看醫生！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedz9jfqE4w
南天門的大門口。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJxwxmbX7W
觀音：孫悟空被二郎神打傷了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYccAiUiTz
玉帝：貌似不是2郎神傷的。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡES9ydv2gGc
太上老君：陛下，我可助二郎神一臂之力。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXTmppBjyp2
玉帝：你也養狗？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQw6MWbpX58
太上老君：我沒養狗，但我有一個套狗的金剛圈。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibw03IzP9C
玉帝：能套猴子嗎？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0yv4FNhQIE
太上老君：都是動物，應該可以。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJdfqLLU9v
說著，老君拿出金剛圈，瞄準孫悟空，把金剛圈發射出去。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ01pT6zsVxb
孫悟空還在忍痛求救，沒註意天上掉下東西，被金剛圈砸中頭部，暈倒了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBER4QoNJS
二郎神叫來托塔天王，將其繩索捆綁，返回天宮。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvoIxlam8Pf
孫悟空被天兵押到斬妖臺，玉帝率眾觀斬。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNndsU7InTv
玉帝：孫悟空，沒想到，你怕狗。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkxMQhdlc1Q
悟空：剛才，是誰扔磚砸我頭的？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwCi0Pv0CM
太上老君：不是磚，是金剛圈。你恨我吧？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ANBslqs26
悟空：謝謝你！我被你的金剛圈點穴，止住大動脈，控製了狂犬病毒在我體內的擴散。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVXl8OXLM1
太上老君：啊。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWpUGOKYSj
悟空：諸位，我被狗咬了。和我保持一定距離，小心狂犬病。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKrW3qWGLq
玉帝：開斬！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAqfezSG68h
悟空：等等。我是仙不是妖，不能在斬妖臺斬我。求換地方。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEjkEK2YaH
玉帝：換什麽地方。把「妖」改成「仙」，筆墨伺候。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbb13ITLW5c
在斬妖仙臺，孫悟空被刀砍斧剁，火燒雷擊。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzV61yrn52p
悟空：我死了沒有？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8Y4nND18V
玉帝：啊！怎麽還不死？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03iCeVTlkL
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空偷吃仙界食物，已是金剛之身，殺他的方法不對啊。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4IsDbzuuYr
玉帝：咋辦？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqiP7KroRh
太上老君：把孫悟空放進我的八卦爐，扣緊蓋子，煉上7749天，他化成金水，能煉出金子。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAhWvyCp0s
玉帝：太好啦！煉出金子，可以招兵買馬。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyTQOtKgZUK
孫悟空被天兵押到兜率宮。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmc44izm6oq
太上老君：把孫悟空推進八卦爐。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNH9yM8FwZK
悟空：真要把我煉成黃金？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEb5fiC32T
太上老君：玉帝急需用錢。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUBH7Pvj9N
悟空：這裏有沒有浴池？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVbPImpTZy
太上老君：想幹嘛？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgmaOHJNUEj
悟空：我想脫掉衣服，洗洗澡，去趟廁所。可以確保煉出黃金的含金率在99.9999999%以上。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6EqVGUcGt
太上老君：放心的進去吧！我這爐子煉成的黃金，都是100%的純度。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tlePQCxE8
悟空：需要煉我多久？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIv76C70oS
太上老君：7749天。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2y5MX7XumZ
悟空：盡量快些。我很想體驗一下，變成黃金的感覺。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknWVBWlIqn
1天，2天，3天………7749天後。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVspurhee6
太上老君：開爐！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnd2U7I4j2
老君探頭向爐中一看，看到2個圓圓的、閃閃發光的東西。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEM0xNMDCg
太上老君：哈哈！孫悟空被煉成金蛋啦！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkqp2JCD0dk
說著，伸手去拿金蛋。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMICzIso26c
只聽爐內「哎呀」一聲！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLt6erQ7MAH
爐內：誰插我？誰插我？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx57hSHCrQW
太上老君：我的金蛋！我的金蛋！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4P1mZEvAw5
爐內：哪個王八蛋插我？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrmVVBt8Uh
呼！孫悟空從爐內跳出來。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJKpMes4L1
悟空：哪個王八蛋插我眼睛？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRG9ZecxAuC
這時，老君才看清楚，發光的2個金蛋，是孫悟空的2只眼睛。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIk3vVxEzqi
太上老君：孫悟空，你怎麽還沒死？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkky3DgiWFn
悟空：我也想知道。我怎麽還沒變黃金？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHJgA0Lcwb
太上老君：你的眼睛已變成黃金。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaoDuQzD2Pe
悟空：多謝了。我的眼睛已經變成火眼金睛！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JLerUKVUo
太上老君：有什麽了不起。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcqWkUd1R9
突然，老君的衣服起火。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPQZVfaGDO
太上老君：啊！孫悟空，不要用你的眼睛看我！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYcneC3MwD
兜率宮內，孫悟空眼睛看到的地方，急速起火。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVt9zYggPyn
太上老君極速報知靈霄殿的玉帝。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJQ3ity5pFA
太上老君：陛下，備水！備水！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ApkAsiQei
玉帝剛好喝下一口茶，看到老君衣服冒火，嘴裏一噴水，火滅了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9XODuQLyn
玉帝：老君，你煉金小心點。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20AKMv8vXF
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空從火爐逃出，還煉成一對火眼金睛，看到什麽就使什麽著火！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq6bzs8eyso
眾仙：啊！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFkKdh1MDT
玉帝：怕什麽。來人，放狗！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLYNXMv0iHD
剛說完，孫悟空來了。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHgIpviLX3
悟空：玉帝，狗在我這。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2RJrdw5h3
玉帝一看，孫悟空用火眼金睛，正在烤一只狗。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXjjrks2eZe
玉帝：啊！護駕！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1M2GO1njlY
眾仙神護住玉帝。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZdBYCtlZm
悟空：別緊張。等會兒大家一起吃燒烤。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl2aONJb8GN
一會兒，靈霄殿上，到處是火。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQSsaoc3FOQ
玉帝和太白金星躲在一張桌子下，一杯一杯的不停向身上倒水。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqUmK4k4qLs
玉帝：愛卿，快幫朕想想辦法。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1LJf0aBWp
太白金星：陛下，聽說西方雷音寺的主持如來，有一坐騎是一條狗，很厲害。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQnBo2bpJ8D
玉帝：他哪是啥狗？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgztqgIE1Y
太白金星：好像叫佛獒。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBiVwKPIHaC
玉帝：速請西方如來！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfQlvJ1RGq
如來騎著佛獒，從靈山雷音寺趕來。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLpW2rcay2
悟空：你哪位？愛吃燒烤嗎？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2xx2iO8W4M
如來：我是西方極樂世界釋迦牟尼尊者，南無阿彌陀佛。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpcaeJT5EL
悟空：歡迎！一只狗不夠吃，你的這條狗，能不能貢獻一下？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡft2Y1AZ7KB
如來：孫悟空，狗是人類最好的朋友。很多人反對、反感吃狗肉，你怎麽一點也不愛護動物？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfADPkjdIBm
悟空：難道你愛護動物？整天騎著狗亂逛，你願意被人騎著亂逛啊？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5b323VbDe
如來：額。。。我這條狗名叫佛獒，很兇猛。我騎著它，是防止它咬人。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskmL0aSM76
悟空：防止咬人還會咬人。吃進肚子，省心看管，絕不咬人。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJL5xoTtHS
如來：我這條狗，可不好吃！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbdSwzNAWzY
悟空：調料放全，好吃的很。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPa5NzwmUbu
如來：我先讓你吃一小塊。難吃，你別吃它，留它一條性命。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1iJBouVvB
悟空：先來一條狗腿。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHZnYEKJqu
如來：我先給你一只狗掌吧。接著！68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCDijjteES
如來投給孫悟空一只狗掌。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dPtg6u6Zp
悟空接住狗掌，發現狗掌上有一串字——唵嘜呢叭嘧吽。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpWcsFYPvZ
悟空：你還會微雕？68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNQbKcYCafz
突然，狗掌越變越大、越變越大……68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkiS6p1UaU
悟空：這麽大，我可吃不完。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoPXZHudYK
狗掌化作金木水火土五座聯山，喚名五行山，墜落在地球，重重的把孫悟空壓住。68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡevCIF5Hr9o
68Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JYOevvFvf
大話囍遊
作者:
刀鋒戰水
刀鋒戰水
篇 #11
第11回 大鬧天宮
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