但現實是這樣又如何?1092Please respect copyright.PENANAdF7NU85dY3
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAIu6qUYG6sm
沒法理解,沒法接受。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAfJ6AjhOzsu
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAmlHirZcqT7
童桐變了,已經不再是我小時候認識的那個她。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAZGHM6htlZ6
1092Please respect copyright.PENANACJQ5kxHZ21
但現實對我來說,過於…難以理解。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAsZaUsOpxo4
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAc7TrLOLlOP
她甚至連一個苦衷也不編,一個謊也不撒。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAyobix5IYO4
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAGYCo03PeFB
要該高興嗎,還是要哭?我曾經視她如宗教一樣的存在,現在卻。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAztXFRXFZUf
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAb87Pmaqdhz
現在卻。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAua12fkmMjS
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA0gJ6Lss9LF
感覺最近情緒上的衝擊,我已沒法作出正確的反應,腦海被攪成一團糊糨。我掩著臉搖著頭,恍如因射箭而滿是厚繭的雙手,能為我提供一個避風港。1092Please respect copyright.PENANASVv8OumqDc
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAxAiJpic6ku
因為我的避風巷已經毀了。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAMtDmJ1Uv8D
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAu1I9rqhdTp
因為我的童年…1092Please respect copyright.PENANAUPoaCQoe53
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA8c1pqA2Ys3
…真真正正的,結束了。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAbnpu8ky5Hz
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAGiBLOdQvnO
「呀遊,我地都有唔想俾任何人見到既一面…我相信你都有。」童桐說,「但即使係咁…我都會接受,呀遊,因為由所有面向組成既…先係完整既你。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANA9fK4SEYklG
1092Please respect copyright.PENANARd8vFEnij6
甚麼是好人,甚麼是壞人?1092Please respect copyright.PENANAMjM0pqiq5z
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA41YtOwsovy
壞人在自己的故事中,也是一個英雄。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAC6HEEzuFcg
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAivMWfa6MmE
捐錢幫助窮人的慈善家,也有人視之為資本主義中的剝削者。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAKVm9xyQmcZ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA2rfdCU6nSA
不用說到這樣宏大,我媽也不是沒被人說過HR死全家,我爸把釣到的魚放上網和人分享也被動保主義者說血腥屠夫。1092Please respect copyright.PENANARFUORbZzxr
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA8Kt5u8NbR2
但對我來說,二人都是父母,是家人。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA7NuXwjGWkc
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAiLWkseiWzY
不同人對於不同人來說,可以同時是好人,同時亦是壞人。1092Please respect copyright.PENANALOYxbUpqif
1092Please respect copyright.PENANALm3ZR7Q2gE
…但當距離親近如我和童桐這樣,所有面向便互相嵌鑲成一個完整的存在,並非一個單獨面向。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA9drGt9NaX6
1092Please respect copyright.PENANABdiHuWacCS
愛慕她的好。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAuI1OeLJL4r
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAVRHrs6lsoN
便要接受她的壞。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAbD9mX8FMjL
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAuWJFMnYFhj
我竟然天真的曾經以為童桐只有好的那一面,如甚麼完美的聖女。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA3h4tEyVOf6
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAlvttQL1zfT
現在殘酷而赤裸裸的事實放在眼前,至於接受與否便是我們的課題了。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA2o6AStyU6H
1092Please respect copyright.PENANATLpsbq9G3l
即使我和童桐身上都穿著衣服,但卻比起過往十多年來任何時候還要更加赤裸,更加坦誠相見。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAcOCgU2QQ4D
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA1nDdoM9WtP
「你肯定?」我冷冷地說。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAKiVhPECrTl
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA6ckIYlEXIk
她還不知道我幹了甚麼。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAtPdPYtkhar
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA0TBEzQ2rNT
她還不知道我曾經打算幹甚麼。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA91zqfKgiYC
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAEShhvzopqb
「…嗯。」她說,「我,我又有咩資格話你?無論你做過咩都好…」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAk4VK7fm1uE
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAh64zCmVxnH
童桐雙眼發光,好像在淹水中捉到了救生圈一樣。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAquCD2tD8F5
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAa2tGqjNOZ7
「所以你覺得如果我都有一個黑暗面,一個黑化版既呀遊,我就同你一樣自私,同你一樣有唔見得光既一面,所以我地就平起平座,我就應該接受你,然後可以如以前一樣?」1092Please respect copyright.PENANATON3GM7g6h
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAgLaW0qPH0A
「…唔係咁…」卻被我看穿了。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA3AubmmGrJs
1092Please respect copyright.PENANASp8grdwi1E
「定係我咁講正合你意,咁樣你內心會舒服D,因為自甘墜落既人唔止你一個?」1092Please respect copyright.PENANApSYujupezZ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAvJRFdKJzkO
「唔係咁,唔係咁唔係咁,呀遊,唔好咁講,求下你…」童桐哭著說。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA0lyjRdjP8i
1092Please respect copyright.PENANALsko8ioiv4
「…童桐,我地永遠都唔可能好似以前一樣。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAjEFCRfb6CT
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAcrac8zhdYT
然後,我推開了她。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAv59IoDcVr7
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAK5GAVg7XOu
史無前例地,我推開了正準近我,打算向我撒嬌的童桐。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAk9OehQYxFZ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAnvVEPtQn9O
「……」她露出寂寞的眼神。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAHJ81yGINF4
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAEp7FkhA3g2
「你講得岩,我都有另一面,我都有做過D唔想俾你知既事。」我低頭說,「但…我好亂,我唔知,我唔知點樣面對你,同你一樣。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAH3o7OwdcHK
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAlU75q4HKul
「邊個會無?我鐘意你,即使你有咩秘密都好我都一定會…」童桐說。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAZpjoun7QzS
1092Please respect copyright.PENANACcWOnRDNHg
「我係你就唔會咁講。」我苦笑。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAebg8zexXH0
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAdXxtsc7EpA
「係…?」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAO2jj9GWJqb
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA3cdJgw4fJX
「我個時都咁講過,我話無論你做過咩,有咩秘密我都會接受到…然後我個心就碎左。」我輕撫自己的胸口。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAYMGv0ZkhPy
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAUCaVJujpvO
愈是鐘愛於幻象,現實就更加殘酷。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAbSL1iQRdXa
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAOnJBQxiSPJ
夢中愈是甘甜,現實便愈見苦澀。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA0nzzO5HclM
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAL40xqyFO1n
「我唔信,呀遊你唔同我,你係個好人…」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAqhcL0gOdGR
1092Please respect copyright.PENANApMV6w8lkoF
「我先唔係。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAxy9lQA3h2l
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAZIgUHDoUz9
我早就不是甚麼好人。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAtl0CMfcjTh
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAHHlOe6vfVf
從明明連人家名字還沒記住便去追求人家,胡亂表白開始,到之後的事。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAZCIpcDpL1o
1092Please respect copyright.PENANABwYyObH3xF
我才不是「除了射箭甚麼也不會」的人。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAO3Li5dJ3Nx
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAvLKViO5N2d
「咁你講出黎。」她說,「我寧願你親口講,都唔想某日自己發現。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANA9pNZzlw5Pn
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA2nA4RMvobc
「……」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAM9fuDdp84W
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAkYaSTFjZRP
是我害得植嵐晨自殺。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAsbADO8EgZn
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA3uztFPhGpY
那天我差點按下了清理瀏覽記錄而間接害死他。1092Please respect copyright.PENANArZUuAHLRhb
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAyspyXqDcUR
為了勝利我打算吃禁藥。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAcpsGBSDswa
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAjsbecDKdC7
我和妍妍有了肉體關係,但沒打算負責任。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAV2rpMIEa8x
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAtjC1ozKB31
當天第一次妍妍出現在水上樂園是,其實是PTGF。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAfUEo2Z1JlQ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA7lSLhZ6wBG
中學時那連串的表白行為,其中一些我可是明知有男朋友也照去馬。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAIcGtMHlCwG
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAYtUt7dDNPx
……那年我打算過自殺,甚至已經完成了氦氣袋的試作型。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAQhrIbGJSgs
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA96ApNkVra5
「呀遊,我地大家今晚都互相坦白喇…然後睇下點樣互相接受到對方,好唔好?我唔想無左你呢個青梅竹馬,無論做唔做到情侶都好。」童桐說。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA7WnReyrkIJ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAmvFap01ERJ
「我諗…今晚我地都攰。」我說,「我求其煮個公仔麵就返過去。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAhRCHSo47DV
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAlokTP6dv99
「呀遊…」1092Please respect copyright.PENANA5ROdEeVQcG
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA48q2k62TTu
「我會講。」我說,「只係…唔係今晚,我要,童桐,對唔住,我…做唔到…我好攰,我好撚亂呀,你明唔明呀。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANA8rWQoiDDPW
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAtMDGaJ31gY
我試圖以過去的眼光看待她。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAwk75DhgkSC
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAJnOOxyp8FV
做不到。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAcYMEoz972D
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAKdadJqx8ww
我試圖向她坦白自己做過的一切。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAe69C9nn62k
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAu7iPspdvoc
做不到。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA2ZK69cjLv2
1092Please respect copyright.PENANARJQ5tRSMDJ
既然我知道了她的真面目後這樣激動,這樣看待她,反過來…其實也一樣吧。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA6CIOYgmXl2
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAUwPGcjrniJ
只是現在是我在暗,她在明,她才這樣向我告解一樣。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA7uQ0qHTjBl
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAdXFLD56eau
下午離開Beta那兒之前,他幫我設定了一個倒數計時,現在距離核彈爆炸只剩下167小時。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAdA2AJ58IFo
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAv2boFKLydI
我沒有高童桐一等,更別說是道德高地。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAGGhOrp7zXN
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA3lkZCYh5Ey
所以我也沒法狠狠罵她一頓,然後說要帶她回正途,連這樣子我也做不到,這才是現在一切膠著,一切如陷五里霧中的原因。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA5y1jKeKFoZ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAdgjhxAgEPa
既,沒法坦白。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAF4BCdLfIhj
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA4Mjm2pSq1X
又,沒法斥責。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAFfHwqPTTyJ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA1W94ROIy3a
既,沒法接受。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAPqEB1GTULt
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAy8mxjfQtPo
也,沒法忘記。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA6jFi3S1OhB
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAYrlae9SVKF
而且…也沒法理解。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAxN3ZmKd4ok
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAXXfklstRNq
明明妍妍叫我不用在意她,去處理和童桐之間的事,結果卻變成了這樣子。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAyAwMttCvOE
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA3xtzUqki18
反倒有點對不起她了呢,我這爛人。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA9MCR5SbDyQ
1092Please respect copyright.PENANANfURvRMlOe
我轉身胡亂地擦去眼淚,以免自己在童桐面前出醜。但這時背上傳來陣陣的溫暖,陣陣的柔軟,童桐從後抱住我,把頭靠到我背脊上,用耳朵貼住我的肌肉聆聽著我的心跳。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA4JnsgOSB2I
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA0H8sNHsNEe
「只要你係我身邊,你要嬲我幾耐都無所謂。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAh04MNK4WPY
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAy9XrzG0SRF
「……」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAw1s3GNg5Li
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAQmIBkJ5pw7
「因為我地都應承過大家,嬲幾耐都好,最後都會搵返對方,唔準絕交,唔準永遠唔彩對方落去架嘛。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAychFNAXrA6
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA6RGvNc1nnP
她能聽到我的脈動,反之亦然。1092Please respect copyright.PENANArMaoYFeJRb
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAn3E1vpdZUG
我雖然沒法直接聽到,但我感受著童桐的每一下呼吸,每一下心跳,胸膛的每一起伏。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAI3IuhxlPHu
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAikFTugUM75
「只要你無事就好,我個晚真係好驚。」童桐說。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAzLwdWGu04b
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAJthG9EoqrI
「嗯,我都睇到係你救左我。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANA2rFfH6K4Cp
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAcdlAa6TY5C
「但即係係咁…即使你會討厭我,即使你個下已經知道左我係Dora,我唔知點面對你…我都唔想你有事。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANAi2DEhcEUAO
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAWmgz3ae3ro
曾經她只求唯有我別討厭她。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAGqjcDVwn2E
1092Please respect copyright.PENANApmOVgrO01m
曾經她即使全世界討厭她也不怕,因為有我在她身邊。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAcFtSkeXym0
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAm8yvJutAc2
…現在即使連我也討厭她,她也只想我安全健康。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAddrgPK6Zd7
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAPBpmSylRKw
你叫我怎樣對你生氣,童桐。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAu2qWejP62g
1092Please respect copyright.PENANALxwTYQFeq9
「我…好多謝你,童桐。」我說,的確是她救了我。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAAafH2BrlSi
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAsZWe6ZecHU
「…到你覺得可以講既時候,就同我講。」童桐說,「我地只要互相坦白,然後互相再接受,互相理解對方,一定可以捱過呢一關。」1092Please respect copyright.PENANA9gQ8GaRgCq
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAfAzcAPxB9F
咦?1092Please respect copyright.PENANAv3IdbjCwJx
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA82kWS38Rvi
腦中如一道清泉流過…我覺得這就是我和童桐最大的差異之處。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA4TqLgOgVFq
1092Please respect copyright.PENANANYB84muREK
「接受與否」,是我的想法。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAecOE0khK2B
1092Please respect copyright.PENANACDcvyWuAp9
「如何接受」,是童桐的想法。1092Please respect copyright.PENANATyZqGIS7Dt
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAvHZnRMDb9t
那天晚上我和童桐沒有得出任何答案,甚至說沒有任何進展。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAwl6kFmQiNP
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAeUthZ7WWDC
她甚至沒有提出我希望中的苦衷,使我可以諒解的苦衷,只能得出「性格使然」的絕望答案。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA284Gg6DFtH
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAJFpVI9eBDW
老實說,場面比我想像中平靜,至少我們沒有向對方咆哮或痛哭。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA0DjpzdgDWM
1092Please respect copyright.PENANApxP6yMjQ09
但是…無力感漸漸佔據了空氣,佔據了心底,連情緒該發洩向何處也沒有著力點。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAqQENBGxUQO
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAG53aoNBpUY
我寧願和她痛痛快快吵一架,也不想這樣子…1092Please respect copyright.PENANAclvkViTA6p
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAwg0d0Hksb7
…我真的不想。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAuOAYmjWlSX
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAazFoF1NFz7
至於和她坦白的話,我覺得不是時候,所以也沒有說出口。我需要時間去沉澱,去思考,去好好盤算接下來的做法。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAQKwqD78KTr
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAQWK4foznxF
活了在幻象中廿多年的我,被狠狠地摔到現實中。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAv7JVK6azYN
1092Please respect copyright.PENANA1uirv0ZIfd
現在我要學習在現實中活下去。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAkwgfHNMYHa
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAvQVjpNXgHq
第二天早上,距離核彈發射還有153小時。1092Please respect copyright.PENANAH9o6Ly7LfF
1092Please respect copyright.PENANATXYBdc0ljg
童桐的窗簾現在到了早上醒來…也再沒有打開了。1092Please respect copyright.PENANA8E5ScCOebl
1092Please respect copyright.PENANAR0TCkt0iMk
那兒,只有一片茫然和我心中懷念。
arrow_back
【實體書有售】《青梅竹馬真係最難追》
more_vert
-
info_outline 資料
-
toc 目錄
-
share 分享
-
format_color_text 介面設置
-
exposure_plus_1 推薦
-
打賞
-
report_problem 檢舉
-
account_circle 登入
X
【實體書有售】《青梅竹馬真係最難追》
作者:
陳立正

篇 #65
結局篇III:我們都沒法理解15082022
喜歡 9
閱讀 1088
書籤 442
campaign
催更 0
打賞

按此加載下一章
X
每次催更後,作者都會收到通知!
smartphone100 → 催更
×
寫下你喜歡這個故事的地方
×
對此喜歡的人