孫悟空降至花果山水簾洞，走路搖搖擺擺，全身帶著酒氣。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJ39IoTWVG
悟空：小的們！我回來啦！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEsaZ9T3kq8
通背猿猴帶著一幫猴子歡呼圍上。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGn78lUsvSo
通背猿猴：大王，你老人家可回來了！你這一去，100多年！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQ09FNzAPO
悟空：啊。你怎麽計算的？我只離開半年。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4bxtU7X62
通背猿猴：你忘啦，天上一天，地下一年。100多年前，我對你說過。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVsiQ5oWLE
悟空：你半年前這麽說。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvk5Xfhdt3
通背猿猴：我100多年前說的。你以後上天，記下天數，寫在紙上。在天數後加個「年」字，這個數字便是地上的年數。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUHgtjyforY
悟空：有別的計算方法嗎？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6bV2CDQKHo
通背猿猴：你用筆，也可以把年先寫上。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD5BqyJdtnG
悟空：天數加年，2個我一塊寫。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mVLeaA2gL
通背猿猴：100多年沒見面，我們好想你！55555……（傷感地大哭）75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwrtlxScii
悟空：想我想哭了？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM5IDaUor1a
通背猿猴：嗯。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO3Ot9xNJ51
悟空：額。（吐了一口）75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kt5u5A9s1
通背猿猴：大王，你怎麽了？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0z4XVBlym
悟空：我也想你們！額。（又吐了一口）75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCjWojM8Du
通背猿猴：哪不舒服？你在吐呢。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyVNZvjnNMF
悟空：沒。是我想你們想的，吐了。（又吐幾口）75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbx29zPOvJ6
通背猿猴：你想我們挺多的！玉帝封你做齊天大聖沒？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOGk4J07Mw
悟空：封了。在天宮舉行的冊封儀式，使我終生難忘。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbHi3UDCa3
通背猿猴：大王，描述一下冊封儀式，怎樣？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMPMFOC5gB
悟空：不了。我終生難忘的，我知道就行。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53WrXzmMlz
通背猿猴：描述100多年前的事，回憶一下美好時光。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzSrv09xfi
悟空：我累了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl2qwYwD0HU
撲騰一聲，孫悟空倒在地上。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfp60vOiwXr
通背猿猴：是醉了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSIxW5oGXJO
天宮。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAetwaTySmL
靈霄殿上，玉帝的臥底土地，進見玉帝。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpIFC2Ub6WP
土地：陛下，蟠桃園又大又圓的仙桃，都被孫悟空偷吃了！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCI2maOrU5
玉帝：啊！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6OhkUyO1d
一會兒，太上老君進見玉帝。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoQDyjL6dM
太上老君：陛下，我嘔心瀝血煉的九轉金丹，都被孫悟空偷吃了！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSgxA5mDvyE
玉帝：啊！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3tZLS0StA
又一會兒，王母進見玉帝。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLWeAvW7Gg
王母：陛下，我準備的蟠桃宴，弄了很多酒菜，都被孫悟空偷吃了！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6ydi92sv4
玉帝：孫悟空啊孫悟空，你這個吃貨！你敢偷吃我吃的東西？！孫悟空在哪？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveS3PXT4RH
太上老君：天宮的監視鏡顯示，孫悟空已返回花果山。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwP6izPtnLd
玉帝：誰願下界捉拿吃貨孫悟空？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPoQeTxiiOa
托塔天王：我！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hcThTcsff
哪咤：我！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvCbZ1nuyH
巨靈神：我！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0FhfF2P3SP
玉帝：天王，又是你們3個。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTz5gzIcRdV
托塔天王：這次可以加幾個。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZpMH3Zr806
玉帝：我給你天兵10萬。記住，這次要給孫悟空一個群毆。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsD2ovOZ9A
托塔天王：這麽多人群毆一個，要排隊掛號。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uv0G3oZ4O
玉帝：不能排隊，不能掛號。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3OOdBpIQD
托塔天王：一定做到。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqtKDOewZ8
李托塔、哪咤、巨靈神，帶天兵10萬，一路出師下界。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqgAeSGqSO
路上。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMwg2HSQare
哪咤：父王，我們10多萬人，怎麽做到群毆一個？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7cMzWGyCOl
托塔天王：簡單。10多萬人停在花果山上空，一起向下扔兵器。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl42MX7W2dI
巨靈神：太血腥了吧？花果山會血流成河。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIheqqdIE5q
托塔天王：下一場大雨沖洗幹凈了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡac8N1nhkJM
巨靈神：一場大雨能解決麽？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHbUq8zoxhT
托塔天王：我看行。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmPn3vR4nY8
巨靈神：我看不行。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3rM4Z6lgC
托塔天王：不行再下第二場、第三場，直到沖洗幹凈收場！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKlyzZsPFXO
巨靈神：我看也行了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkKHBbmLRDV
這一日，花果山陽光明媚，萬裏無雲。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP250fNtYEx
孫悟空正在和眾猴飲酒狂歡。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOzCalX6YCT
半空中，托塔天王、哪咤、巨靈神出現。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0uhIRdMmaT
托塔天王：孫悟空！你偷吃仙桃、偷喝仙酒、偷吃仙丹。玉帝派我將你這個吃貨捉拿歸案！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2J4PoW9ZY
悟空：又來捉我？上次捉我失敗，這次，你有沒有做好心理準備？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAwHCienjqe
托塔天王：有。這次準備群毆你。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuKX1VSUW7h
悟空：群毆？你們3個？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXpyFpcHGM
托塔天王：我還有10萬天兵斷後。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx6PIgrQuyE
悟空：總共10萬多3人？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA6RuF2swdf
托塔天王：人多也能群毆你！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPt8wFAFQig
悟空：失敗，失敗。我這花果山上上下下，也是10萬人多出3個。這次，只能1對1單挑。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nyr6Xmfh3
托塔天王：啊！是嗎？這可怎麽辦？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrB5tVcWjf
巨靈神：天王，我們按原計劃開戰吧。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vHywGhBFM
托塔天王：不能！敵我雙方的人數對等，不能群毆。開戰，違抗玉帝旨意。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7v8pIxnOQ
哪咤：父王，我向玉帝請求支援。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItLRrVRdxg
托塔天王：快。我先做好群毆準備，圍住花果山。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNaGanQdrO
花果山上空，集聚10萬天兵，遮住太陽，天黑了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTKxhwqJys
眾猴：大王，我們害怕。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0oFUFUIn2W
悟空：天黑怕什麽？來人，掌燈。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwvV0BYxv7
頓時，花果山上萬家燈火。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7BawEOLHH
哪咤返回天宮，在南天門遇見玉帝。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MIhEpmuh9
玉帝十分關心花果山戰況，正和群臣在南天門觀戰。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw2O4KSyO5E
哪咤：陛下！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQI5xGq93Tc
玉帝：3太子，前方戰事如何？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcffS6cIjoI
哪咤：急需增兵。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Qp3yT2MWW
玉帝：10萬兵力也不夠？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN2UXd2aCNn
哪咤：孫悟空的兵力也是10萬，不能群毆。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNPTLfx7YqJ
玉帝：啊！天宮的總兵力只有10萬。諸位仙臣，這可咋辦？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6EkvWrOUmQ
突然，一道霞光閃過，南海觀世音路過。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPEgjm56UR
觀音：諸位好！我們一起參加蟠桃宴會吧？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQBSoviAa4x
王母：蟠桃宴會的飯菜，被下界一個叫孫悟空的猴子偷吃了！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOiYFXaHf9d
觀音：陛下，真的麽？求證一下。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rt5HdP00g
玉帝：真的。我後悔，當初多花錢、多招兵買馬，多好。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWBKeYbNzE
觀音：孫悟空很厲害麽？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6aXTYYtpDu
玉帝：那猴子偷吃仙桃、偷吃仙丹、偷喝仙酒，是一個擁有兵力10萬之多，很厲害的一個吃貨！觀愛卿，你可有法子對付？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRT9aOsWCPn
觀音：我推薦一位。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHasGvtmOlB
玉帝：直說。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EajeI4WyQ
觀音：二郎神。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26szTc7P8V
玉帝：2——郎神？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoVKlL05tz4
觀音：二郎神現居灌江口，享受下方香火，他也是一個吃貨。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYk1jlg8Dzj
玉帝：行麽？聽到2我擔心。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWj6Dste69k
觀音：放心。你別忘了，一貨擒一貨。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4KO297kyox
玉帝：他還是2貨吧。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU8CHdAz7fL
觀音：二郎神可以一抵萬！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bils4TGHP
玉帝：好！增兵一萬，宣2郎神迎戰孫悟空。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKiq8fECvv
哪咤帶著二郎神，見到托塔天王。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34msSIZhiG
哪咤：增兵到。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡurXe7m3xFE
托塔天王：增兵多少？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSQfkdcTjt
哪咤：一萬。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMtk4uE8u9
托塔天王：在哪？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucV8A7JAqm
二郎神：我。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIe5Tz8LdGb
托塔天王：怎麽帶來一個人？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvlaZL6xIDy
哪咤：父王，觀音和玉帝都說，他可以以一抵萬。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMSo2zOO5f
托塔天王：超兵一萬，夠群毆了。天兵聽令，舉起你們手中的兵器，群毆開始。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90hp3vjJG4
二郎神：慢。聽說孫悟空和我一樣，都是吃貨。在群毆之前，我想單獨和孫悟空交流一下。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxkaaSsNu7B
托塔天王：你交流快點。手舉著兵器，挺累的。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAJjU3pkAq
相貌清俊、秀氣的二郎神，手拿三尖兩刃槍，步伐輕盈的走在花果山上。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmnOFJEUwk
眾猴：好帥喔！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHezJRe1aZ7
悟空：帥哥，你哪位？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ewEJD8qKj
二郎神：我是號稱以一抵萬的灌江口吃貨……75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOaZ0yN9wc
悟空：同吃，同吃。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjYiawchzW6
二郎神：帥氣稱霸一方，至今還單身、還沒經歷初戀、還是處男的二郎神！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOQvA84Ras
悟空：沒感覺。我男的。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡytlMokXnGk
二郎神一轉身，不知從那拿出一朵花，含在嘴裏。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlB5NGRqOd
悟空：說了沒感覺，你擺Pose也沒用。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdleKsWxT1X
二郎神：知道這是什麽花？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdGy7UaTXPZ
悟空：鮮花。我這花果山多的是。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv63kwrMwqb
二郎神：錯！這是一朵只在冬天盛開的梅花。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRjpQXuP0A
悟空：喔。這種花，花果山可沒有。你那多不多？我打算移植到花果山。等花果山上下雪，我想身臨其境「墻角樹枝美，唯有暗香來」的詩境。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09Z6l0Jiw5
二郎神：知道這是什麽神器麽？（手指自己的兵器）75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Yw2fdN5II
悟空：怪怪的。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGKkP1BGjfs
二郎神：這是上古神器——三尖兩刃槍。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vqHlQLCiR
悟空：三刃兩尖槍？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJvkGgUalG
二郎神：三尖兩刃槍。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUl7Ttqopld
悟空：幹脆簡稱三尖槍，聽到這麽憋口的武器名字，沒心情和你打了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0EyO0C4VBL
二郎神：誰說和你打？我只想在群毆前，會會你。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGEw8xXhxQD
悟空：多你一個，也看不出群毆的效果。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpZT4Lfmed
二郎神：我可是以一抵萬。多我一個，等於多了一萬人。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcR9kGs6Og
悟空：好吧。這次天宮對我群毆的挑戰，我接受。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0GM3UCvlbO
二郎神：等著群毆吧你！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWIdsVTGMsU
悟空：現在還沒開始，你我先過幾招，預熱一下，咋樣？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zNbqvZHHS
二郎神：現在10萬人圍著花果山，你不覺得熱嗎？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4N1BjVEv3S
悟空：我有點缺氧。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRsN7Lotgcn
二郎神：同感。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo8gSLB6q61
孫悟空和二郎神開始做深呼吸。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RPDUVBttl
悟空：我還沒和處男打過，你和我打一場，破破我的處吧。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RkSlzsWyu
二郎神：不打。等天上的兵器扔你。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nA2xLQw9m
悟空：你一個人打敗我，拿個頭等功。知名度一提高，會吸引很多美女。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAOOnzmxlZu
二郎神：開打。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKgtDUlbaq
兩個人的兵器一碰，三尖槍斷了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgQ2ru7F1z
二郎神：啊！我的神器！55555……（大哭）75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVL4ZpyZuNr
悟空：什麽神器，不堪一擊。要麽是次品，要麽是膺品，要麽是仿品。不要為它難過了。回家找個不是奸商的鐵匠，重新打造一件。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcbiVYNmrHZ
二郎神：我的真是上古神器。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesb22h6qsT
悟空：是麽？我這根棍子，是上上古的神器，你的材質沒我的好。不要為它難過了。回家買件上上上古的，肯定比我的好。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFItiQEFVNV
二郎神：我要為我的神器報仇！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP0ZXH4DJmY
悟空：你回家買一件再說。過幾天，我約你再戰。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTIJyRckNAo
二郎神：我還帶著一件上古神器呢。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1Ip9KW6uy
悟空：留著吧，別斷了再傷心。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGtLtxNHok
二郎神把2指頭伸進嘴裏，吹了一聲口哨。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGAgP6Tzuzo
悟空：這也算神器？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kPqqdrAx2
口哨一吹，不知從那冒出一條狗，在孫悟空腿上咬了一口。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZYZJMnhcH
悟空：疼死我了！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SqHsgKUso
二郎神：哈哈哈。這是我的第二件神器——上古神犬。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiYYoLmve5Z
悟空：有沒有狂犬病？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNP5l3nxbZf
二郎神：不確定。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzKHKuqU48
悟空：來人！我要看醫生！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAX2A7xhlYy
南天門的大門口。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbSCdQIiG6S
觀音：孫悟空被二郎神打傷了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1c77hIn5p2
玉帝：貌似不是2郎神傷的。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNymzGDSkQ3
太上老君：陛下，我可助二郎神一臂之力。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnzo3MN3mr
玉帝：你也養狗？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjRx5mZLx4
太上老君：我沒養狗，但我有一個套狗的金剛圈。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTVK6904Jpc
玉帝：能套猴子嗎？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgM0rsnAh7
太上老君：都是動物，應該可以。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4Vb0Ou4i5
說著，老君拿出金剛圈，瞄準孫悟空，把金剛圈發射出去。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tiksfGKbP
孫悟空還在忍痛求救，沒註意天上掉下東西，被金剛圈砸中頭部，暈倒了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYU3f5FrVi
二郎神叫來托塔天王，將其繩索捆綁，返回天宮。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZKT7xm6VI
孫悟空被天兵押到斬妖臺，玉帝率眾觀斬。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4EfvlYKUOQ
玉帝：孫悟空，沒想到，你怕狗。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaW7gSJHj9g
悟空：剛才，是誰扔磚砸我頭的？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUrR7j5fTJ
太上老君：不是磚，是金剛圈。你恨我吧？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVysLCxoxb
悟空：謝謝你！我被你的金剛圈點穴，止住大動脈，控製了狂犬病毒在我體內的擴散。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieNu2liGZ7
太上老君：啊。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYhOoLLIS9
悟空：諸位，我被狗咬了。和我保持一定距離，小心狂犬病。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uSMxekrkH
玉帝：開斬！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1WCu0OnSJg
悟空：等等。我是仙不是妖，不能在斬妖臺斬我。求換地方。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsrBeVJdtLy
玉帝：換什麽地方。把「妖」改成「仙」，筆墨伺候。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWkQh6EQhqZ
在斬妖仙臺，孫悟空被刀砍斧剁，火燒雷擊。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwsms8Sfo2n
悟空：我死了沒有？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡguTtqUc7Eh
玉帝：啊！怎麽還不死？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnWw38Ewd0
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空偷吃仙界食物，已是金剛之身，殺他的方法不對啊。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMlM3SvfBE
玉帝：咋辦？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPG6A9Q3wbb
太上老君：把孫悟空放進我的八卦爐，扣緊蓋子，煉上7749天，他化成金水，能煉出金子。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhH9reWhNss
玉帝：太好啦！煉出金子，可以招兵買馬。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ76C1DKlpxa
孫悟空被天兵押到兜率宮。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RLTX1GHm4
太上老君：把孫悟空推進八卦爐。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGg4WSuX2r
悟空：真要把我煉成黃金？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8xqBxbzzZM
太上老君：玉帝急需用錢。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARPh7KQnaX
悟空：這裏有沒有浴池？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GKmmAnQlt
太上老君：想幹嘛？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybszl847kK
悟空：我想脫掉衣服，洗洗澡，去趟廁所。可以確保煉出黃金的含金率在99.9999999%以上。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSfSw6ZIej
太上老君：放心的進去吧！我這爐子煉成的黃金，都是100%的純度。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvZgZhIayn
悟空：需要煉我多久？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmA0ebWzPE
太上老君：7749天。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoE2EDiAsBK
悟空：盡量快些。我很想體驗一下，變成黃金的感覺。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWE1FuDVUOS
1天，2天，3天………7749天後。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsURdST8i9
太上老君：開爐！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhOI4tA6UxN
老君探頭向爐中一看，看到2個圓圓的、閃閃發光的東西。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUQJAt3ESx
太上老君：哈哈！孫悟空被煉成金蛋啦！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡan5EHbS43E
說著，伸手去拿金蛋。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcZ0WS8aIt
只聽爐內「哎呀」一聲！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXI2Zsh3dr
爐內：誰插我？誰插我？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFKyvjlbjj
太上老君：我的金蛋！我的金蛋！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwEXyLnC7l
爐內：哪個王八蛋插我？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3LKZSwiEgN
呼！孫悟空從爐內跳出來。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCohhj1H9sK
悟空：哪個王八蛋插我眼睛？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGpde9WQCK
這時，老君才看清楚，發光的2個金蛋，是孫悟空的2只眼睛。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBREJQ5pVzi
太上老君：孫悟空，你怎麽還沒死？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtq9Pgwazvf
悟空：我也想知道。我怎麽還沒變黃金？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfgSGJC7sm
太上老君：你的眼睛已變成黃金。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWcoZW5cNeh
悟空：多謝了。我的眼睛已經變成火眼金睛！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFY9eR3YpI
太上老君：有什麽了不起。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMyID1jI4BB
突然，老君的衣服起火。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphHXDeNQdP
太上老君：啊！孫悟空，不要用你的眼睛看我！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1BE419dgMp
兜率宮內，孫悟空眼睛看到的地方，急速起火。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZoOI8yEZ8
太上老君極速報知靈霄殿的玉帝。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLCBYzlvfg
太上老君：陛下，備水！備水！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnGuGeIUt8V
玉帝剛好喝下一口茶，看到老君衣服冒火，嘴裏一噴水，火滅了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwbSHFONx2
玉帝：老君，你煉金小心點。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvSBRrZfW7
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空從火爐逃出，還煉成一對火眼金睛，看到什麽就使什麽著火！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6xRKiwQKr
眾仙：啊！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNL7CzxT3Y
玉帝：怕什麽。來人，放狗！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuW0jmGfno0
剛說完，孫悟空來了。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV5G9kaEMr
悟空：玉帝，狗在我這。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCiu1mjnwYf
玉帝一看，孫悟空用火眼金睛，正在烤一只狗。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9ZEq6I21E
玉帝：啊！護駕！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcbDGFAs034
眾仙神護住玉帝。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJhERlgsn60
悟空：別緊張。等會兒大家一起吃燒烤。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhamPkVCqF
一會兒，靈霄殿上，到處是火。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEudn66h0U
玉帝和太白金星躲在一張桌子下，一杯一杯的不停向身上倒水。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGozaJr6U3t
玉帝：愛卿，快幫朕想想辦法。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58Z8l7NW3X
太白金星：陛下，聽說西方雷音寺的主持如來，有一坐騎是一條狗，很厲害。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQ0boLSwtH
玉帝：他哪是啥狗？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9y6I1WaCR
太白金星：好像叫佛獒。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDbeO4g3E8h
玉帝：速請西方如來！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1rDMoitvIt
如來騎著佛獒，從靈山雷音寺趕來。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq494K0L14f
悟空：你哪位？愛吃燒烤嗎？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWy3odYzQUt
如來：我是西方極樂世界釋迦牟尼尊者，南無阿彌陀佛。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa3hSeJ1i7k
悟空：歡迎！一只狗不夠吃，你的這條狗，能不能貢獻一下？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRTuTBC9nK7
如來：孫悟空，狗是人類最好的朋友。很多人反對、反感吃狗肉，你怎麽一點也不愛護動物？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1nVCZYCbJ
悟空：難道你愛護動物？整天騎著狗亂逛，你願意被人騎著亂逛啊？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhu4thjWyb
如來：額。。。我這條狗名叫佛獒，很兇猛。我騎著它，是防止它咬人。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6IntGY1HHQ
悟空：防止咬人還會咬人。吃進肚子，省心看管，絕不咬人。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡETm6ecbFDN
如來：我這條狗，可不好吃！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqH4eWVNDb
悟空：調料放全，好吃的很。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrLsElOlWFy
如來：我先讓你吃一小塊。難吃，你別吃它，留它一條性命。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9W3MyDgQo
悟空：先來一條狗腿。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XELNHmkE1
如來：我先給你一只狗掌吧。接著！75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYTV9OLnmw
如來投給孫悟空一只狗掌。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡujD7cY7N6H
悟空接住狗掌，發現狗掌上有一串字——唵嘜呢叭嘧吽。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNUgGzxSff2
悟空：你還會微雕？75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOy8k3QBgRC
突然，狗掌越變越大、越變越大……75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9idhXqU41
悟空：這麽大，我可吃不完。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEWwoePx3qB
狗掌化作金木水火土五座聯山，喚名五行山，墜落在地球，重重的把孫悟空壓住。75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡewin9drb32
75Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQjBaIeUHA
大話囍遊
作者:
刀鋒戰水
刀鋒戰水
篇 #11
第11回 大鬧天宮
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