孫悟空降至花果山水簾洞，走路搖搖擺擺，全身帶著酒氣。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxLR3WSR1yM
悟空：小的們！我回來啦！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bn4ifpnCQ
通背猿猴帶著一幫猴子歡呼圍上。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofmVPyQNc2
通背猿猴：大王，你老人家可回來了！你這一去，100多年！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx443lulYJa
悟空：啊。你怎麽計算的？我只離開半年。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNArnHawv4B
通背猿猴：你忘啦，天上一天，地下一年。100多年前，我對你說過。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpAu1arGGFt
悟空：你半年前這麽說。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYJQpk5OPC
通背猿猴：我100多年前說的。你以後上天，記下天數，寫在紙上。在天數後加個「年」字，這個數字便是地上的年數。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNX4DzwpfH
悟空：有別的計算方法嗎？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oKymLbKZB
通背猿猴：你用筆，也可以把年先寫上。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHmlg4Dg1y
悟空：天數加年，2個我一塊寫。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFgSoj1SxC
通背猿猴：100多年沒見面，我們好想你！55555……（傷感地大哭）64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0kyN9meEX
悟空：想我想哭了？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0bj4RMHYRB
通背猿猴：嗯。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMS8e5fZKNb
悟空：額。（吐了一口）64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUrRvrIT7o
通背猿猴：大王，你怎麽了？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXCy9UZBIF
悟空：我也想你們！額。（又吐了一口）64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdL9VLX3qJA
通背猿猴：哪不舒服？你在吐呢。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DeL7v70rt
悟空：沒。是我想你們想的，吐了。（又吐幾口）64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHWWsX9yIQ
通背猿猴：你想我們挺多的！玉帝封你做齊天大聖沒？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mpkVDfwAo
悟空：封了。在天宮舉行的冊封儀式，使我終生難忘。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuwecxWgcA
通背猿猴：大王，描述一下冊封儀式，怎樣？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZVLH4m44Ld
悟空：不了。我終生難忘的，我知道就行。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSP36PTJzI
通背猿猴：描述100多年前的事，回憶一下美好時光。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFYKSHuGSP
悟空：我累了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrB7BHrGo3P
撲騰一聲，孫悟空倒在地上。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxXEbPFJAo
通背猿猴：是醉了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy63ra05iis
天宮。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8HCXtGovx
靈霄殿上，玉帝的臥底土地，進見玉帝。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRNkxs5CvLT
土地：陛下，蟠桃園又大又圓的仙桃，都被孫悟空偷吃了！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPgsjNEv56
玉帝：啊！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzDJWee8FuU
一會兒，太上老君進見玉帝。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmindCkGIlB
太上老君：陛下，我嘔心瀝血煉的九轉金丹，都被孫悟空偷吃了！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQ6VAIMlfx
玉帝：啊！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk5vk4sHW41
又一會兒，王母進見玉帝。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uPMhyxedn
王母：陛下，我準備的蟠桃宴，弄了很多酒菜，都被孫悟空偷吃了！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzxFS6keNo8
玉帝：孫悟空啊孫悟空，你這個吃貨！你敢偷吃我吃的東西？！孫悟空在哪？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbqGm9tff5
太上老君：天宮的監視鏡顯示，孫悟空已返回花果山。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1kOhSJUUC
玉帝：誰願下界捉拿吃貨孫悟空？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeKYbcJVGy
托塔天王：我！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ335baIqyWR
哪咤：我！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAimJ3Q1Z6V
巨靈神：我！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ31a3aImAzV
玉帝：天王，又是你們3個。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gK8SQGZgt
托塔天王：這次可以加幾個。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVt7IGoe8b
玉帝：我給你天兵10萬。記住，這次要給孫悟空一個群毆。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYPRUDxF2f
托塔天王：這麽多人群毆一個，要排隊掛號。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6qj2YLWcQi
玉帝：不能排隊，不能掛號。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNmBnM2oKqz
托塔天王：一定做到。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhWkxDRnKhV
李托塔、哪咤、巨靈神，帶天兵10萬，一路出師下界。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4trIe6A0n
路上。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5VbmX1Vm7
哪咤：父王，我們10多萬人，怎麽做到群毆一個？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uSw2SBJUG
托塔天王：簡單。10多萬人停在花果山上空，一起向下扔兵器。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlklfRcbeAu
巨靈神：太血腥了吧？花果山會血流成河。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5spJjFfMJx
托塔天王：下一場大雨沖洗幹凈了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ78DDEHr8w6
巨靈神：一場大雨能解決麽？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfF8xB90AU
托塔天王：我看行。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ37vD5lydJG
巨靈神：我看不行。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzchVIhugzV
托塔天王：不行再下第二場、第三場，直到沖洗幹凈收場！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjKZ6n2htk
巨靈神：我看也行了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07dyatqSNz
這一日，花果山陽光明媚，萬裏無雲。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0v1Vgi5efd
孫悟空正在和眾猴飲酒狂歡。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVmprxL14Bl
半空中，托塔天王、哪咤、巨靈神出現。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH67tYvT2mg
托塔天王：孫悟空！你偷吃仙桃、偷喝仙酒、偷吃仙丹。玉帝派我將你這個吃貨捉拿歸案！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLapLiXOtg5
悟空：又來捉我？上次捉我失敗，這次，你有沒有做好心理準備？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkon6WclCba
托塔天王：有。這次準備群毆你。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYCkYehbWKQ
悟空：群毆？你們3個？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJU6HFOuTCJ
托塔天王：我還有10萬天兵斷後。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CUw3MDpHZ
悟空：總共10萬多3人？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi58PbCGWu0
托塔天王：人多也能群毆你！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu1rfYivPHe
悟空：失敗，失敗。我這花果山上上下下，也是10萬人多出3個。這次，只能1對1單挑。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe7tAvpGf4d
托塔天王：啊！是嗎？這可怎麽辦？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmQNJrw8x7
巨靈神：天王，我們按原計劃開戰吧。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH81oy2tGys
托塔天王：不能！敵我雙方的人數對等，不能群毆。開戰，違抗玉帝旨意。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIA3WueFBfP
哪咤：父王，我向玉帝請求支援。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWgNYtBABR
托塔天王：快。我先做好群毆準備，圍住花果山。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5D14aorrq
花果山上空，集聚10萬天兵，遮住太陽，天黑了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgM5o6CWmm
眾猴：大王，我們害怕。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAsEk89HCkk
悟空：天黑怕什麽？來人，掌燈。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7OFECTl2bh
頓時，花果山上萬家燈火。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1T4ZKoxRTa
哪咤返回天宮，在南天門遇見玉帝。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1Z0KuM6V0
玉帝十分關心花果山戰況，正和群臣在南天門觀戰。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpTfLfTxZ6
哪咤：陛下！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVupgYqowPF
玉帝：3太子，前方戰事如何？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaN703MqZlf
哪咤：急需增兵。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGhqmXPy9A
玉帝：10萬兵力也不夠？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXBeRU2md7U
哪咤：孫悟空的兵力也是10萬，不能群毆。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡauGLrVItAN
玉帝：啊！天宮的總兵力只有10萬。諸位仙臣，這可咋辦？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqY9kX1X5K
突然，一道霞光閃過，南海觀世音路過。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOcnsfynq4
觀音：諸位好！我們一起參加蟠桃宴會吧？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKEv3R5nWPe
王母：蟠桃宴會的飯菜，被下界一個叫孫悟空的猴子偷吃了！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3MRo6lmg8
觀音：陛下，真的麽？求證一下。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ6yNGFEQFi
玉帝：真的。我後悔，當初多花錢、多招兵買馬，多好。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9FH2GtHdJl
觀音：孫悟空很厲害麽？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTmWuVARmkO
玉帝：那猴子偷吃仙桃、偷吃仙丹、偷喝仙酒，是一個擁有兵力10萬之多，很厲害的一個吃貨！觀愛卿，你可有法子對付？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0XdM2p2IS
觀音：我推薦一位。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCqC3ikNwb
玉帝：直說。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdjkb3H8e3
觀音：二郎神。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PchzIhOf7
玉帝：2——郎神？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBTMRSSQsoS
觀音：二郎神現居灌江口，享受下方香火，他也是一個吃貨。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusaN0fNocM
玉帝：行麽？聽到2我擔心。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIeeQNQpm5
觀音：放心。你別忘了，一貨擒一貨。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ6T5ua65fv
玉帝：他還是2貨吧。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTHFctuJQL
觀音：二郎神可以一抵萬！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX65a34ZWON
玉帝：好！增兵一萬，宣2郎神迎戰孫悟空。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqw8IebXfo
哪咤帶著二郎神，見到托塔天王。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn4BTpzeYAK
哪咤：增兵到。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1BdiTMEW5l
托塔天王：增兵多少？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaxb1p5otZ
哪咤：一萬。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBv3KznVj5r
托塔天王：在哪？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CzRd57U1n
二郎神：我。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZj9fRElKL
托塔天王：怎麽帶來一個人？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmaF9H19C8N
哪咤：父王，觀音和玉帝都說，他可以以一抵萬。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvjnnOkP9gJ
托塔天王：超兵一萬，夠群毆了。天兵聽令，舉起你們手中的兵器，群毆開始。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQzyswdc3cs
二郎神：慢。聽說孫悟空和我一樣，都是吃貨。在群毆之前，我想單獨和孫悟空交流一下。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡglZBjSMdfT
托塔天王：你交流快點。手舉著兵器，挺累的。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofAGzrsALu
相貌清俊、秀氣的二郎神，手拿三尖兩刃槍，步伐輕盈的走在花果山上。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrGWTX6t52
眾猴：好帥喔！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2WdVuwilrF
悟空：帥哥，你哪位？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdWcFS0DamQ
二郎神：我是號稱以一抵萬的灌江口吃貨……64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx4dhWtqJv7
悟空：同吃，同吃。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡerud1bQpUt
二郎神：帥氣稱霸一方，至今還單身、還沒經歷初戀、還是處男的二郎神！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUON1A7RZdF
悟空：沒感覺。我男的。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6OHY39Tdm
二郎神一轉身，不知從那拿出一朵花，含在嘴裏。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnT3mQpqXw1
悟空：說了沒感覺，你擺Pose也沒用。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSsfajd8YfD
二郎神：知道這是什麽花？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWgwMmDa7JY
悟空：鮮花。我這花果山多的是。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC4RK3SK64V
二郎神：錯！這是一朵只在冬天盛開的梅花。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxx89ddxp2y
悟空：喔。這種花，花果山可沒有。你那多不多？我打算移植到花果山。等花果山上下雪，我想身臨其境「墻角樹枝美，唯有暗香來」的詩境。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCvh6ycHG8
二郎神：知道這是什麽神器麽？（手指自己的兵器）64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VbuHCmGMt
悟空：怪怪的。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQB4G8K8HkF
二郎神：這是上古神器——三尖兩刃槍。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjt17b4xRt
悟空：三刃兩尖槍？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Px0zuPwLj
二郎神：三尖兩刃槍。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjW5crRJRkz
悟空：幹脆簡稱三尖槍，聽到這麽憋口的武器名字，沒心情和你打了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHhsWARr3vn
二郎神：誰說和你打？我只想在群毆前，會會你。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjS1cXjjfrm
悟空：多你一個，也看不出群毆的效果。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSqyTmjUwvL
二郎神：我可是以一抵萬。多我一個，等於多了一萬人。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy2yx9pnow4
悟空：好吧。這次天宮對我群毆的挑戰，我接受。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8u6tO0YX1
二郎神：等著群毆吧你！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYN6hnwkWY
悟空：現在還沒開始，你我先過幾招，預熱一下，咋樣？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5QGs1fxyv
二郎神：現在10萬人圍著花果山，你不覺得熱嗎？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7kN2fREys
悟空：我有點缺氧。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4pt6KQ1ttx
二郎神：同感。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcli86AmqPB
孫悟空和二郎神開始做深呼吸。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfprB0Df3i1
悟空：我還沒和處男打過，你和我打一場，破破我的處吧。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJi34EFxlGs
二郎神：不打。等天上的兵器扔你。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZIiVQu0hQ
悟空：你一個人打敗我，拿個頭等功。知名度一提高，會吸引很多美女。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3OLgJFTbT
二郎神：開打。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqgXXyOmjG
兩個人的兵器一碰，三尖槍斷了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVxGaE9TMP
二郎神：啊！我的神器！55555……（大哭）64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcGUhZXa62
悟空：什麽神器，不堪一擊。要麽是次品，要麽是膺品，要麽是仿品。不要為它難過了。回家找個不是奸商的鐵匠，重新打造一件。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0fgi5q5pa
二郎神：我的真是上古神器。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu95VX7Dphx
悟空：是麽？我這根棍子，是上上古的神器，你的材質沒我的好。不要為它難過了。回家買件上上上古的，肯定比我的好。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqP7e1iMi7d
二郎神：我要為我的神器報仇！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kiGOgrZvS
悟空：你回家買一件再說。過幾天，我約你再戰。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIy5IajrMvm
二郎神：我還帶著一件上古神器呢。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6JZTD3YoC
悟空：留著吧，別斷了再傷心。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkbiqwnveId
二郎神把2指頭伸進嘴裏，吹了一聲口哨。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM81CghBOcz
悟空：這也算神器？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOziCIcg569
口哨一吹，不知從那冒出一條狗，在孫悟空腿上咬了一口。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAxLGAHBIw
悟空：疼死我了！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbyrdpdCcZ
二郎神：哈哈哈。這是我的第二件神器——上古神犬。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfKW4OdH7Gm
悟空：有沒有狂犬病？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgnJGfJ8XQ
二郎神：不確定。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGPKoVzTpvk
悟空：來人！我要看醫生！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27qYL0UbBo
南天門的大門口。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1WYDPsDXr5
觀音：孫悟空被二郎神打傷了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnfpYO8J8YN
玉帝：貌似不是2郎神傷的。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3h6FaFxhx
太上老君：陛下，我可助二郎神一臂之力。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKCvp3lX8H
玉帝：你也養狗？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa3vVyB4oi1
太上老君：我沒養狗，但我有一個套狗的金剛圈。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ZPrK8HnlL
玉帝：能套猴子嗎？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrj3TWAMTZ
太上老君：都是動物，應該可以。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdNfzyrlCf
說著，老君拿出金剛圈，瞄準孫悟空，把金剛圈發射出去。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwLiby1uKo
孫悟空還在忍痛求救，沒註意天上掉下東西，被金剛圈砸中頭部，暈倒了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlsPE3A2pJ
二郎神叫來托塔天王，將其繩索捆綁，返回天宮。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNfDdpz8vE
孫悟空被天兵押到斬妖臺，玉帝率眾觀斬。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMkLgSy2Nq
玉帝：孫悟空，沒想到，你怕狗。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnA5tHpb314
悟空：剛才，是誰扔磚砸我頭的？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQnTzFFyrU
太上老君：不是磚，是金剛圈。你恨我吧？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2VcYtHSKSm
悟空：謝謝你！我被你的金剛圈點穴，止住大動脈，控製了狂犬病毒在我體內的擴散。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQWQahoNL1
太上老君：啊。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFSllDNLBkS
悟空：諸位，我被狗咬了。和我保持一定距離，小心狂犬病。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR1AVWVhrxC
玉帝：開斬！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rRQqWCH7l
悟空：等等。我是仙不是妖，不能在斬妖臺斬我。求換地方。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzYuNMiV5A
玉帝：換什麽地方。把「妖」改成「仙」，筆墨伺候。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwgnqt4H1F9
在斬妖仙臺，孫悟空被刀砍斧剁，火燒雷擊。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgWAUtPz94o
悟空：我死了沒有？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFh6NUd3eBi
玉帝：啊！怎麽還不死？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv4okDDiuj7
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空偷吃仙界食物，已是金剛之身，殺他的方法不對啊。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjATwRu4jFU
玉帝：咋辦？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYk8waYDbq
太上老君：把孫悟空放進我的八卦爐，扣緊蓋子，煉上7749天，他化成金水，能煉出金子。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQs7dGPQC5
玉帝：太好啦！煉出金子，可以招兵買馬。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgYzi3gduq
孫悟空被天兵押到兜率宮。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPunIWXrQVd
太上老君：把孫悟空推進八卦爐。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZTsAIJ0ta
悟空：真要把我煉成黃金？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbVxUzTOOhK
太上老君：玉帝急需用錢。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfnPs6paRCN
悟空：這裏有沒有浴池？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgkqJFkEm8
太上老君：想幹嘛？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPu4UrOQM0
悟空：我想脫掉衣服，洗洗澡，去趟廁所。可以確保煉出黃金的含金率在99.9999999%以上。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8muo2nMZO
太上老君：放心的進去吧！我這爐子煉成的黃金，都是100%的純度。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgoFraB3QYc
悟空：需要煉我多久？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BYl6HJ0qA
太上老君：7749天。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu34TOxkHre
悟空：盡量快些。我很想體驗一下，變成黃金的感覺。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWg7Aamesef
1天，2天，3天………7749天後。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwhgxIS60Jn
太上老君：開爐！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ303Au9WDdE
老君探頭向爐中一看，看到2個圓圓的、閃閃發光的東西。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDx20Ibq9C
太上老君：哈哈！孫悟空被煉成金蛋啦！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4r2RHyx1aq
說著，伸手去拿金蛋。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZyDmGgWrD
只聽爐內「哎呀」一聲！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAdTEhIqIzC
爐內：誰插我？誰插我？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAcpRRaxGmI
太上老君：我的金蛋！我的金蛋！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdokUGtOcLf
爐內：哪個王八蛋插我？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJX1kq7FWz
呼！孫悟空從爐內跳出來。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDKOr0ZfLh
悟空：哪個王八蛋插我眼睛？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjoc1pJTdd
這時，老君才看清楚，發光的2個金蛋，是孫悟空的2只眼睛。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY03pCKW6ui
太上老君：孫悟空，你怎麽還沒死？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK96ZvQzqs9
悟空：我也想知道。我怎麽還沒變黃金？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAdaaeWPiKs
太上老君：你的眼睛已變成黃金。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ94gchbYzdP
悟空：多謝了。我的眼睛已經變成火眼金睛！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfy6mMWDIl
太上老君：有什麽了不起。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GDweLgPO1
突然，老君的衣服起火。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZYcVDvwL7Z
太上老君：啊！孫悟空，不要用你的眼睛看我！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtyixlTVsuo
兜率宮內，孫悟空眼睛看到的地方，急速起火。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDWqZtmdL2
太上老君極速報知靈霄殿的玉帝。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtLaRXCHmR
太上老君：陛下，備水！備水！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLkNTxmIzJF
玉帝剛好喝下一口茶，看到老君衣服冒火，嘴裏一噴水，火滅了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLARDdQ2ix
玉帝：老君，你煉金小心點。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqPQFjf4tY
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空從火爐逃出，還煉成一對火眼金睛，看到什麽就使什麽著火！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdCPOrWF20
眾仙：啊！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cQGjVCXrC
玉帝：怕什麽。來人，放狗！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgCiMGTUjX
剛說完，孫悟空來了。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSBPdSmedP
悟空：玉帝，狗在我這。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW4zBuJFQN8
玉帝一看，孫悟空用火眼金睛，正在烤一只狗。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmQZglD4kp
玉帝：啊！護駕！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsiwfywNs9G
眾仙神護住玉帝。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXQGyOrPO5
悟空：別緊張。等會兒大家一起吃燒烤。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9m7mZHH4Xa
一會兒，靈霄殿上，到處是火。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7uyY7U1drt
玉帝和太白金星躲在一張桌子下，一杯一杯的不停向身上倒水。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIhBUf5AuB
玉帝：愛卿，快幫朕想想辦法。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLcypXpTDy
太白金星：陛下，聽說西方雷音寺的主持如來，有一坐騎是一條狗，很厲害。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQioElWKEb
玉帝：他哪是啥狗？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMpz34Qot3
太白金星：好像叫佛獒。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZOaYXXVe7
玉帝：速請西方如來！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsn0IsOOtd7
如來騎著佛獒，從靈山雷音寺趕來。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX8OKW42YOm
悟空：你哪位？愛吃燒烤嗎？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoyHN5Rudl
如來：我是西方極樂世界釋迦牟尼尊者，南無阿彌陀佛。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6pFxkbuGv
悟空：歡迎！一只狗不夠吃，你的這條狗，能不能貢獻一下？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWStCumh0H9
如來：孫悟空，狗是人類最好的朋友。很多人反對、反感吃狗肉，你怎麽一點也不愛護動物？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfPyLb74iq
悟空：難道你愛護動物？整天騎著狗亂逛，你願意被人騎著亂逛啊？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsjwW455fBS
如來：額。。。我這條狗名叫佛獒，很兇猛。我騎著它，是防止它咬人。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06eO4Wpca6
悟空：防止咬人還會咬人。吃進肚子，省心看管，絕不咬人。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXvUagw0CT
如來：我這條狗，可不好吃！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEjjpvFbn0r
悟空：調料放全，好吃的很。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsqBiXhaB6K
如來：我先讓你吃一小塊。難吃，你別吃它，留它一條性命。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3xnAfjd6H
悟空：先來一條狗腿。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlW33nkcC3b
如來：我先給你一只狗掌吧。接著！64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRXOZXJeEz
如來投給孫悟空一只狗掌。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMm1wHaLeg
悟空接住狗掌，發現狗掌上有一串字——唵嘜呢叭嘧吽。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiV3j94h9xb
悟空：你還會微雕？64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXpOMvfabv
突然，狗掌越變越大、越變越大……64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPj3z9p0OxE
悟空：這麽大，我可吃不完。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUfnnk8ncYw
狗掌化作金木水火土五座聯山，喚名五行山，墜落在地球，重重的把孫悟空壓住。64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6J1jgLogP
64Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UFVHe5EDU
大話囍遊
作者:
刀鋒戰水
刀鋒戰水
篇 #11
第11回 大鬧天宮
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