觸不到的戀人 - 12

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二零一一年，十一月。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfuDk0Y7QI8
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天空一直處於陰暗狀態，大概是已經進入冬天的緣故，所以太陽出現的次數也少得可憐。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlexRqcNclx
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寒冷的冬天。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ElwPrpdP9
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班上的每個人都穿的很厚重，甚至圍上了圍巾，看來這次寒流來襲真讓每個人都冷的受不了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMg5NWSojn
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我也不例外。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryXGdxmf6L
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轉眼間已經進入高二，這一年我是怎麼過去的？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtKIQNSLrph
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原以為會和班上的女生處的不好，但卻意外的合得來，尤其是和那個滿臉雀斑的女生。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpf6K27AS5
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本來陰沉的個性在和她們相處後變得比較開放了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ61Fkhj3daW
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這算好事嗎？我不清楚。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKonQChNON4
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只覺得能維持好現狀就好了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUltgNz1ys
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「橋橋，妳不進來嗎？外面很冷的說。」身後的窗戶被打開，一個女生探頭出來對我說。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1rxSlrNiiu
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我搖頭，然後對她笑了笑，並把窗戶關上。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX14o8quaB3
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下課後只要我是醒著，就會站在教室後門外，就算很冷，也想站在這裡。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRaqwWDZ1rQ
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沒有原因的。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoAfB7F2vo1
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以前做事總是需要原因、理由，但時間久了，才發現這些都是多餘的。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDkPHKiBGn
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太多事情不需要理由。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCS6uKt17N
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包括感情。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKoqNozi8Z
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吹風吹得夠久了，上課鐘也差不多該響了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9drWth7Oc
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在我準備打開教室後門時，耳邊的音樂停止了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWe7OttFFYz
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我伸手觸摸戴在耳上的耳機，然後疑惑。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJM5WX3VbgR
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手機在震動。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNEKTfVVqMc
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我連看都不看直接把手伸進口袋裡，按下接聽。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLAUynZsTtm
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耳機沒有傳來任何聲音，我喂了好幾聲，對方依舊沉默。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU9smAmhsHh
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7eDya4nXiS
會不會對方早就把電話掛掉了？但掛掉的話音樂會繼續撥放才是。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucWnDDZ4Im
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沉默、熟悉的沉默，這種感覺……267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXX5FGhpT7Y
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我緩緩的把手機從口袋裡拿出來，看了來電者，終於明白這沉默的電話為何不會讓我想掛電話。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0rwFvE6Pf3
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早已習慣的沉默。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2s6Ro9MQx
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他為什麼會打來？為什麼是挑今天、這種時候？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTwTm6zu3xW
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7Z7aOYLVD
「楊瑀峰，你在不講話我要掛電話了。」上課鐘在我講完這句話後隨即敲響。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJZecBrOmp
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtmq4F69fU
雖然這節是自習，但我並不想在教室裡講電話，而且是和前男友。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bggKmzkXN
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不曾承認過的前男友。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZmJihIuCf
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「……妳最近過得好嗎？」耳機終於有了些聲音、他的聲音。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMWDzP0ZRin
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hPQW25PFj
一年了，久久未聽到過的聲音。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdztAmakV7z
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依舊冷漠，卻好像多了幾份感情。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWqH4UzzPu
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是我的錯覺吧？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQc8apqMQ7i
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「我很好。」267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSR6LzchjA5
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我以為我會說「在和你分手後的每一天我都過得非常好」，都我沒有，反而平靜的回答說我很好。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmKmCP31VA
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不想用那種諷刺的語氣，一年了，我那無理取鬧的個性不該再存在。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLmGSqTLqr
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他沒再講下去，我們又陷入了沉默。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0VJ01AkaEc
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他還是一樣不多話、一樣冷漠，完全沒有改變。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1y3iruoek
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl1jUjAYsqq
走廊上的人群越來越少，我應該要進教室的，卻因為這通電話不得不止步於此。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXEsjM5kGk
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「我還在等妳。」他說。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJO9UZauZZR
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJasCXsvUE
「當初那麼乾脆的把我甩開，現在又說你在等我？你在跟我開玩笑嗎？」我掩蓋不住語氣中的怒火，我感覺到氣氛開始變差，我和他。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKzJFkwMzi0
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「我們之間能不能不要只有爭吵？」267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgoCM1m3VGV
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這話讓我愣了一下。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsC2eBNquZ8
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我們？現在會用「我們」這個詞了？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1mQtPDqUu
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我強忍住那想哭的情緒，深呼吸、吐氣。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAVxHhuKEHd
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「我不知道你今天打給我到底要幹麻，如果只是問我近況，那我可以大聲的告訴你我過得很好，你不用擔心，我們分手已經一年多了，你還想知道我的狀況幹麻？如果你是在我們還在一起的時候說剛剛句話，我們可能就不會變成這樣，是你不說、是你不肯表達自己，我知道我自己也有問題，那你就沒有嗎？你說你在等我，那又怎樣？你不改變你這樣的個性，我們還是會有爭執你懂嗎？好了，我要去上課了。」語畢，我打開教室後門走進去，電話沒有按下掛斷鍵。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNjueOSaip
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我以為他會結束通話。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dgR7FPG6E
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「葉星橋。」耳機傳來他喊我名字的聲音。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGyyL5kw0w
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我回到座位，然後坐下。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8s2jkSYrM
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「我改，妳等我，好好照顧自己。」267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwYQmbf4nl
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在他講完沒多久，耳機傳入耳中的聲音不再是沉默，而是音樂。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡah5Wr453oh
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通話結束了，他掛斷了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsNSweq6eL
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改變？為我……改變嗎？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZFqytJltV
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我趴在桌上，臉埋進雙臂裡，睡覺。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0eaGH8jHT
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只有睡覺、我才不會胡思亂想、不會期待。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYRmG31tdD
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我沒想到這是我最後一次聽到瑀的聲音。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqh7YZ7lmZd
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＊267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrc1G2NSTEB
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二零一三年，七月。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohiYWPEU1e
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車窗外的景色一直在改變，音樂也是。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnTQUYIsJE
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車上除了音樂聲外還有小迪唱歌的聲音，我和阿龍一直都保持安靜。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAYKUE97JMv
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其實小迪心裡也很不平靜吧？所以才唱歌。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvrHiW7Ki6
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我和阿龍呢？我們也只是表面看起來沒事、心裡亂的很。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhKgyL0WZ6Z
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOmwCQzsZC
看著車窗外，我試著回想你的聲音、你的模樣，卻已模糊。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF9cwhn1vSm
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想不起來。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYMaDitI4j
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車開上了山，這山路一直在繞圈圈，繞的我頭好暈好想吐。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpqEpz0KVqk
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等到不再繞圈時，已經到達目的地了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRARq9Ao2N
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山頂。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4IsS7djkL1
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阿龍把車停好，並解開安全帶，回頭示意我可以下車了。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4z99n0cu6K
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小迪比我快一步開車門，我跟在他後面下車。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8x5lxUz3Ge
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「終於下車了，頭好暈啊！」小迪挺直身體，伸了個懶腰。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZI1kckwJI7
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbF2R9CwqUd
阿龍對小迪嘆了口大氣，然後打開後車廂，拿了一袋水果出來，小迪馬上搶過手，比我們兩個先走一步。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡon2zfFSTYg
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tsZXkddSY
「那傢伙是在急什麼啊？」阿龍搔搔頭，看著小迪離去的背影。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv8zkebj9WV
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswYZcHrleC
我聳肩，然後望著眼前那巨大狀況的建築物，你──就在裡面。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05OxulZYlr
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「為什麼突然想面對了？」阿龍轉過頭問我。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcelwrNhcW
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沉默。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IWa2DfTZX
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJ30vbXC5T
「當初那麼固執不肯接受，怎麼現在完全不一樣了？」267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrF0adcpIig
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zvOf7OpyK
「那一年發生太多事情了，也看開了。」我邊說邊踏出腳步，朝那棟建築物走去。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡejXUfI1zhe
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總得親自經歷過某些事才會長大，對吧？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgmQyFABrVX
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進入大門後，那些我不懂的麻煩事就由阿龍和小迪去處理，我則是站在電梯門口等著。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqEUvBnYlaL
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這裡裝潢的很簡單、但是那種不會看膩的簡單。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cDenH2EYJ
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而且，很安靜。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgUvdi48oQ
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你喜歡這裡嗎？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb6LqE5XEIj
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「橋橋，上樓囉！」眼前出現了一張卡片左右移動著，小迪正拿著電梯感應卡一副準備好的樣子站在我旁邊，而阿龍在他身後。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhCbWpxIgW
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按了電梯，等電梯開門，我們三個一起走進去，小迪按了五樓，然後用感應卡啟動它。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDreqKPzww
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YKb62TQnf
電梯一層樓一層樓的上去，我突然覺得喘、覺得不自在。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgzdi7mTtaB
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五樓到了，很快。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3TcAJjmWXH
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電梯門一開，先看見的是一座佛像，然後周圍的走廊有幾個人在走動，走廊直到盡頭的左右都有條路可以進去。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡthHUd2BPFp
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很多個房間。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLV1V2Hscny
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我停在佛像前面，凝望。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDs6oIcGzYC
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「怎麼了？」小迪拍了我一下，一臉擔心的問。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡczC7UsyCn8
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「我在想，他真的想見到我嗎？」我雖然是問小迪，但視線一直沒有離開佛像過。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NsOzKbkbe
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這個問題雖然在來之前，他們已經跟我確定過了，但我還是想問。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lxn0uY1e0
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiBWlVTqtP
問佛、問你。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsoBXO46qT
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC7gV8ddkqC
你想見到我嗎？那麼殘忍的傷害你的我？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQDBNjDhP8M
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUAYVNyELyJ
「只有妳，才是阿楊最想見到的人。」阿龍回答。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLnc60hSAO
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzQt5iZA9X
我知道。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuGVrNEGXK
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyQZXoOm58
我在心裡告訴自己，我知道他一直想見到我，只是我的懦弱讓我一直選擇逃避。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSZnTJjU1c5
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsjYL5x9DoB
小迪勾住我的手，朝著他所在的地方前進。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq1ndb7kgDJ
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjUjb5AAqIz
不知道經過了多少房間，小迪才帶著我轉彎，走進一個房間裡。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYK0XNunH7e
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8g9zRnTvl
這房間其實很大，很多櫃子，裡面，有很多人的──267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6eev0NwNDe
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRBE46ToDlH
骨灰。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkeVOovklR6
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAI6xIHBbos
走到靠近窗邊的位子，小迪放開我的手，然後淺笑。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWAzjB9SyY2
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6waVFEWIJ6
悲傷的微笑。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiwqjyoaAa6
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xzYkCgc7n
「這位子是我們、阿傑、殷一起出錢買下來的，很適合阿楊，我覺得很適合。」阿龍像是在對我說、又像是在自言自語。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWStoTRFJI
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTE99W5vVQ
「阿楊，我們來看你囉！這次我們終於把橋橋帶來了。」小迪邊說邊打開那扇門。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAn4iSBnQ37
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3CaNOOD9Y
有你在的那扇門。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSYw5dMZKi
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZkNLShiYj
有時候我常常在想，人死後被擺進這麼小的一個空間裡，不會寂寞嗎？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF9YHb4b7vq
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHrf25ydxdZ
一直以來都很孤僻的你，會寂寞嗎？267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeCcaJzwETG
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymZmJqS406
小迪和你說了好多好多的話，說到眼眶濕了聲音哽咽了也還是繼續說下去，而阿龍則是靜靜著聽小迪和你說話。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmK52mh0nRm
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvz1n0dIirz
小迪說了什麼？我聽不清楚，我一直處於失神狀態，直到阿龍叫了我。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrI5t4HdzX
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdqwBkpy5Pq
「我們先去電梯口那邊，等等在過來，妳和阿楊好好說說話吧？」阿龍拉著好像快哭的小迪，離開了這裡。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnZLh7kuS3
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoO9qufrCpJ
我愣在原地許久，才走上前，然後面向你、看著你。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPIAI19gDgo
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPsWbXkU27
照片中的你和記憶中模糊的你終於重疊，我想起你的模樣，那冷漠不帶任何表情的帥氣臉龐。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIqCj5sEfFh
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVigYt5ickn
笑起來令我深深著迷的臉。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXmqRok9pO
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC6JdMwRnyl
不知道花了多久的時間，我才讓聲音從嘴巴裡發出來，對你、對這沒有任何人的房間。267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WvWPrS1v1
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIe5FswLNh
「好久不見。」267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLnFzUTJtZD
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl3sm5BcdGf
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPnWsFCbO8
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUngH768Ozf
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡek7xfHjThH
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyN5gWwSUWB
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTpRLXRDNPs
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIKCMyDBdr
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCog9Fc1nb
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK68JA1ZHZh
我們已處於不同世界，而你存在的地方，是我無法觸及到的。ns216.73.216.229da2

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