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I am quietly installed in my office. This is my own place, in this family home. Far from the adventures of my children, I appreciate being able to breathe calmly from time to time. There, I decompress and take the time to think, to drown myself in my thoughts, in my memories.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0qAT6Nkljk
Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I quickly slip the photo I had been looking at for several minutes into the pocket of my blouse, and pretend to be concentrating on a file. I barely have time to say, “Come in” when the door opens to reveal my daughter. At seventeen and a half years old, she has behaved like a real tornado since the start of her adolescence, four years earlier. However, in her face framed by long brown hair, childhood can still be seen.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKP3OIYr3y7
— Mom, I need to talk to you about something super important ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMqBrdL0lCJ
I suppress a smile. With Orlane, everything is always mega important ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf839s8Ubjl
— Ok I hear you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9fHy3Lrccn
— With Alexandra, we would like to get a tattoo ! She says, excited, as if it’s the best news of the year.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1yBVSWyDw
— A tattoo ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6gkHJPDZtL
She nods energetically.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqUfZUqffYf
— While you are still a minor ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpRv1upbdL
— Soon to be an adult.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMKWoAGkuw
— Yes, so seventeen years and counting.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpw08Ye3UNj
— If you say so. So, is it yes ? I need parental consent to do this.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6zL6IJ8Rsi
— No way ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0Bq7VsFwy
As I expected, my daughter's face turns an angry red, while her light eyes darken.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DiYdSU7Cf
— You never let me do anything cool ! She shouts, slamming the door behind her.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUyIygyGPhI
Another of these great classics is to avoid any discussion by taking long strides. I hear him scream.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTtK26GkAf6
— She always forbids me from everything ! She’s never there for us ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNq9uUd8u6M
— You exaggerate ! Mom is always there whenever we need her, tries to calm my son down in a paternalistic tone.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqvTv7zbzy5
Calm, thoughtful and very mature in nature for a young man of sixteen, my son has a character that is the polar opposite of that of his sister.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrsoY9UjPT
— She’s not a cool mother ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQ5GgYTVDA
I decide to join them in the kitchen.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKfBKhtI1l
— If being fashionable means letting you drink alcohol, do drugs, let you date anyone, or allow you to get tattoos, then no, I'm not cool...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCmzm3nr5o
— But why don’t you want to ? After all, it’s just a little drawing on the skin, adds my daughter with a pout.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEjLngoHI8
My God, how tenacious she is… Like me ultimately.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6y0TmJ4njO
— Orlane, the day you want to get a tattoo for a good reason, I will accept, but not to be like your friends.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3CwDZ1ShS
My son looks at us, imperturbable.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9g5omWvNp
— You definitely have a tattoo ! She accuses me, angrily.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu1GiyhMMTn
I look down, weighing the pros and cons, and end up telling them : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbMMUUxDNDW
— Follow me to the living room, both of you. I need to talk to you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xnjja7HXr
Without a word, they accompany me, and each sit in one of the large armchairs, facing mine.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNt83Yetbou
— You are both old enough now for me to tell you a story. And please don't interrupt me. The story I am about to tell you is personal to me, but it is important that you know it, because it has made us who we are.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr8W3y9M6sJ
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It all started on September 26, 1991 : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGdtD4pYiIO
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Autumn has not yet arrived although the leaves of the trees are starting to turn red under the less intense rays of the sun.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaO5gJsyl0M
I detail my reflection while doing my hair in front of the mirror. I don't think I'm pretty, although many people tell me otherwise. I'm not very tall, I don't have the figure of a top model, in fact, I find myself rather ordinary. Not to mention this damn hair that refuses to stay styled the way I want it ! Giving up trying to tame them, I abandon my hairbrush and go down the stairs of the house. I'm so happy to be in high school where I'm now one of the big guys. Sixteen is the age where my real life begins, the age where my parents finally treat me like an adult and no longer like an immature child. The age when all dreams are achievable and desires possible.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡza85peY7F3
My mind escapes for a moment to fly towards Chad, my boyfriend of several months. Chad is young, handsome, athletic and intelligent when he manages to stay focused long enough on his homework instead of thinking about sports, which is hard for him. He's not very tall, but built like a sportsman : all muscles. I like his black hair in a crew cut, and his hazel eyes. We have known each other since childhood. I had been secretly in love with him for years. In high school, I was known for being the type of serious girl, always top of the class, which did not attract boys, much to my despair. Chad is the most popular boy in school, so there was no chance he would be interested in me until a teacher asked me to help him with math. When he finally asked me to go out with him, I couldn't believe it anymore.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1XDM6LsXS
For six months, Chad and I have been in perfect love...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpodrJbhImP
Okay, we only exchanged chaste kisses, we don't go out much, instead spending our time watching movies at his house. I also admit that contrary to what I had always imagined, I don't feel this passion that romance novels boast about, perhaps this is due to the fact that we have few things in common. When Chad kisses me, I have the horrible feeling of kissing my best friend but I’m sure that with time, our story will become more intense, passionate and that this feeling will disappear. After all, he’s the one I always wanted so everything will work out in the end.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKT9e23pxv
Letting out a romantic sigh, I enter the kitchen. Almost my entire family is gathered there : Ashley and John, my parents as well as Nina, my younger sister. The only thing missing is Nicolas, my big brother who recently left for New York University and who only comes home for the holidays.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYcprXtB9Jj
— My little Megan… The more I see you, the less you look like my baby, my mother laments, staring at me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdDGdYDkHvU
She isn’t very tall, she has a face with soft features that charms most people she meets. I get her brown hair and blue eyes from her. She always expresses herself calmly, but with conviction.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBp1wugo1FZ
I act as if his rantings don't matter to me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfv7iQe7ovz
— Mom, I’ll always be your daughter. And then, you have Nina as a baby…525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzb9Ja1Pr9
My sister makes a face. At thirteen, she sees herself more as a teenager than as the youngest member of the family.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHm7EuDv7oB
— Are you still planning to go to Chad’s party tonight ? How many will you be ? Asks my father before swallowing his coffee.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QMHSL2Dxs
— Yes I’m going. There will be about fifty of us.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFL2ETqzp5a
My father coughs and chokes.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxxyAX0POW
— That much ? Ask my mother in turn.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMP6Ntadhh
I nod yes.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡclFfKdNB3e
— There will be the whole class as well as Chad's friends, that's a lot of people, he's very popular at school.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ51LJSUPTX
— That’s true, my father agrees with a touch of pride.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKgiZ34EcB
Even though he tends to be overprotective, I love my father very much. I find him a handsome man for his age. At forty, his dark brown hair begins to take on gray shades at the temples and expression lines slowly creep into his angular face, further marking his smile and his frown.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡufhFwoZ8Bm
My father works in construction, his specialty is facade maintenance. He judges each house by the quality of its exterior paint ! My mother is a secretary in a real estate agency, which doesn't excite her, but she has fixed hours, which suits her perfectly. We are a middle class American family. We live in a residential neighborhood in the small town of Millisky, Pennsylvania, where almost everyone knows each other, if only by sight. The town has around five thousand souls. We have a hospital, shops, restaurants, cinemas, and even a large shopping center, so we never get bored. In addition, our town is surrounded by a beautiful forest which allows for long walks, we also have a lake about five kilometers to the south. To the west, a hill overlooks the city, it is the chic district where all the local bourgeois have built their beautiful homes, which most often only serve as second homes. To the north, a highway takes us to Pittsburgh, the nearest major city, a two hour drive, and to the east, Philadelphia is a three hour drive.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLhDpHsJT7Z
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A little later that day, I'm in the main hallway of the school. It is a large white building, some classrooms have faded walls, originally cream-colored, and the same goes for places of frequent passage. The central corridor has on each side of its walls, two rows of gray lockers stacked on top of each other. I take some books from mine when, turning around, I see a boy of average height, with brown hair and light eyes, walk past me. He looks at me furtively. When I meet his gaze, I feel like I'm falling from a ten- story building. It's a strange thing I've never felt before and it only lasts a few seconds. Coming to my senses, I tell myself that I must be going crazy.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7rMRxvpPP
— Not bad, admires Amy, my best friend, who followed my gaze.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0mAvYbxVF
— New student ? I'm asking perfunctorily as I'm sure I've never seen it before.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDE1fSeTb0k
— I’ll find out, says my friend, narrowing her eyes with interest.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY41EtUyPyk
— In any case, he’s very cute, I can’t help but point out.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkaXdXuoNN
— You're the one who says that, even though you're dating the hottest boy in school ! She exclaims, shocked.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJk25FKQ5Fv
I smile, remembering that Chad never wanted to go out with her. He preferred me. It's so rare for a boy to reject her that I know she harbors a little resentment towards me. She has never told me openly but sometimes, like this moment, she throws a little barb at me. Without being mean, it gets heavy some days. However, she has been my friend for so long that I don't see myself falling out with her over such a small matter.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4GCPPmyLdR
Later that day, in history class, I am fascinated by the documentary that the professor shows us concerning the liberation of Europe during the Second World War. This is not the first report I have seen on the subject but each time, I am caught up in the violence, the abomination of this conflict. When the images of the concentration camps appear on the screen, I look away. This is too hard for me, so I concentrate on a completely different theme. Since the start of the course, I have had the strange sensation of feeling observed. As I turn to scan the class, I see the new student sitting two rows behind me, his eyes fixed on me. When he realizes that I have noticed him, he returns his gaze to the screen. I imitate him but after a few seconds, I turn around again.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AGYET9HkY
Grid ! I thought, giving a hint of a smile as he refocused on the documentary. For long minutes, I no longer dared to move. It's stupid but this boy intimidates me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡge8IG8cEEL
When the film ends, I turn in my seat to follow the teacher as he walks around the class summarizing what we just saw. The newcomer is still staring at me. His look is indecipherable.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsFGAlxxSH
— Imagine these families separated during endless years of war, imagine their suffering. If you had been in their place, would you have chosen resignation in the face of the invader or would you have opted for resistance ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9vOfhCbCO
I raise my hand, certain of my answer.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlSzUln42aQ
— Yes Megan.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhV9DF1Gwoi
— I would have chosen resistance. Faced with injustice, I think I would have been incapable of looking at the situation without taking part in the fight.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9kFhwjxrX
— Good. Someone else's opinion ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJrG3wBd49R
Many raise their hands including the new one.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCq4CPZbw0M
— And you, what do you think ? Asks the teacher, addressing him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQkz9h1CYy
— I believe that with hindsight, it is easy to give your opinion, but at that time, people who engaged in the resistance ran enormous risks, not only for themselves but also for those close to them. All this must be taken into consideration.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfVYXA6i2b
— Perfect, Jessy ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqIOoxCwFF
Jessy… 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3wXATKsP9Q
I have a hard time taking my eyes off him even though his name resonates within me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0OFOkzjoNu
— For the next class, you will write me a presentation on this subject, continues the professor.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsd1fsYk1LW
The bell announcing the end of classes rings, the new guy immediately picks up his things and leaves, bowing his head. It makes me feel like I'm running away from the whole world.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUI94c2YQGt
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I head to the bathroom to put some gloss on my lips and find my friends Amy and Pearl there.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFq4RfLmYo
— So, Meg, where are you with Chad ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWMBot3Gdvx
My cheeks immediately turn red.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVqNiS6xXl
— There is nothing to say.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXhnvKuwFr
— Don’t tell us you haven’t done it yet, Amy insists.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6VgnreHjV
— Well no… Well, I mean, do you feel ready ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡijJy9MjVd3
Amy shrugs. I know she hasn't been a virgin for some time.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOgCshIheW
— There’s no reason, Pearl assures. You're with the boy you've always wanted, so why not go all the way ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eQ2lQiVW6
These words make me think more than they should. I've been dreaming about Chad for years, so why do I feel this stuck ? Why don't my feelings push me to open up completely ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCh5VCrk4p
I feel lost and I know perfectly well that it's not my friends I could confide in. They would immediately judge me, thinking I'm crazy for asking myself a thousand questions when I'm dating a great guy.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIx8mCFpn8Z
If only Nick were here, I thought with regret.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJpaSBkI6o
My brother would be able to advise me perfectly. It's crazy how much I miss him. Looking forward to the next vacation so he can come back to see us.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwB5XQFBlY
— By the way, have you seen the new one ? Pearl continues, arranging her brown hair in front of the mirror. He is too beautiful ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxM1S2dgR4c
It’s true that he is beautiful ! A finely sculpted body without being skinny and a face with fine features that I find refined, piercing green eyes lined with long eyelashes, slightly messy light brown hair... I also memorized the little chain with at the end a cross that dangles from his left ear giving him a little rebellious side that I find sexy.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUShzgAoigt
— I learned a few things about him...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5r2um3l7gJ
This simple sentence from Amy focuses all my attention.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdyydsuXriK
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A few hours later, at the end of classes, I found my father in the high school parking lot. This day is important to me. I pass my driving license. I am confident, because for several weeks, Chad has been teaching me everything there is to know and, according to him, I am ready.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9CaBhfLIPZ
— Megan, we need to talk, my father begins.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQ5qNnWPeV
Already knowing that I am going to be treated to a moral lesson, I hold back a sigh.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxguzguCln
— It’s about that party at Chad’s. You know I trust you, but... knowing you with him until late...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7a77Ox4EOd
When I don't answer, he continues : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vY8DQymFD
— Will you be… serious this evening ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTU9tl1djK
— Dad, I'm still a virgin and I don't plan on that changing tonight.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SaZxl9ycZ
— Thank God, he breathes with relief after grimacing.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ23zGsoB2tU
Shortly after, we return home, me with my license in my pocket and my father with the certainty that I am still innocent.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡayucyFiBXl
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In the evening, I found Chad at his house. He lives in a large, modern and chic house, close to the city center. Their villa includes three bedrooms with an independent bathroom, a games room, an office, a fully equipped kitchen and a gigantic living room which, that evening, easily accommodated fifty guests. Outside, in a garden, in which my entire house could fit, is a heated swimming pool. As the girlfriend of the owner of the house, I make a grand entrance. I'm wearing a pretty black silk dress, perfectly fitted, which suits me perfectly. I turn heads as I pass, especially Chad who only has eyes for me. The party is in full swing, the whole class has gathered there.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyF1wTPCokS
I'm chatting with Amy in the corner of the room, when I spot the new student, Jessy, standing a little further away. He observes me while chatting with Stanley, a friend of my brother. He stares at me and gives me a small smile to which I can't help but respond.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQFk4E9boC
Why am I blushing ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36UHk8L1Q1
— This guy is so hot. I'm going to go and get to know each other, Amy said to me, scrutinizing Jessy.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxsTBzqufp
Without knowing why, my heart sinks.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaa0a4M2IrB
— Amy…, my reaction is stupid. You look very pretty with this dress.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElmRedUD2l
She smiles. I see her approach Jessy, Stanley quickly walks away while Amy launches into a tirade, pointing out several people in the room. She must inform him of the gossip that is circulating. I can't help the pang of jealousy that creeps into me when I see her place a hand on Jessy's arm. At this moment, he looks up at me, his expression is indecipherable. I have to look elsewhere... But I can't do it.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9XsEp3Ls3
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're having fun ? Chad appears in front of me and places his hands on my hips.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vsHNKXY3I
Finally I take my eyes off Amy and the new guy. I have to think about something other than his green eyes which make me feel like they are penetrating my soul.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRZ9Ru4oup
I place my lips on my boyfriend's in a brief kiss.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV2eijxJS0F
— Where were you ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0lYBgzxZn
— I was walking around the house. Haven't you noticed that some people look like they've been drunk ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWI4W6di5t0
— Yes, I met Matt earlier, he reeked of alcohol.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHIQDmlCuK
— Great, Chad breathes, annoyed. If my parents find out about this, I'm dead.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXgcwcIe5ex
I glance in Jessy and Amy’s direction. He has disappeared while she returns to us, blowing : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRBMxpji7u
— This guy is weird ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUl1u9lC5wD
— What happened with Jessy ? I said, trying to contain my relief.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42bp72Txv8
— I don’t know, I was talking to him and, suddenly, he went out to get some fresh air. Who invited him anyway ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYazzfMG8r
— It's me. We had a class together, I told him it would be the best way to meet people.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡutUSUFxhdQ
How nice Chad is ! That's why I love him, my heart reminds me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhiYxKkZv2c
— I’m going to try to find out who brought the alcohol, he continues.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuM65m6udWL
— I am coming with you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk7hGFCOLAv
We leave Amy in the living room and head towards the kitchen. A group of American football players, of which Chad is the quarterback, are seated there.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTnIRd60N1X
— Damn, you guys are annoying ! I warned you though : no alcohol.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0BqAANjy4
My boyfriend raises his voice.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfiiHUumcgS
— Relax, Chad, it's just beers.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzlr360vMuT
— Beers or not, if my parents find out I'll be in big trouble, get rid of it ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsvwpzroC2
The five young people take their bottles while complaining and drop one which spills down the front of my dress.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJDFcCXqQh
— It’s clever ! Chad exclaims as I gape.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vIV50zwlq
I grab a roll of paper towels and try to wipe the alcohol off, to no avail.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOCipJVh9nn
— Come with me, my boyfriend said, taking me by the hand. I don't mean to be offensive, but you stink of alcohol. We're going to have problems with your parents if you leave like that again.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwbjNt0FZN
— I know, it’s because of your stupid friends ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1YoWns8IN
— I'm sorry. I have an idea. Go take a shower, and in the meantime, I'll wash and dry your dress and off you go, neither seen nor known ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZF6TotyBoq
Having little choice, I accept.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO07Ijx094J
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Several minutes later, which seemed like an eternity, I found Chad in his room. I am in my bathrobe and my boyfriend is holding my clean dress in his hands when there is a knock at the door. Neither of us has time to make a move that Amy and Pearl are already initiating. They stand in the doorway, look at us and mutter an apology before closing the door, giggling.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNYd7R96Jf
— Great, they’re going to think anything now, I mutter angrily.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5hUDHXOh4
— But no, they are your friends. You just need to explain the situation to them when we get down.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1RInSwC5LO
I'm not convinced, but Chad is right, they are my friends, they will definitely believe me. And then, I have nothing to reproach myself for.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkL7FXsEqCR
Clearly, this evening is far from being the evening I dreamed of ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9THlknRBn
When we join the guests on the ground floor, I immediately feel that they are staring at me with eloquent little smiles. I'm going to pour myself a glass of non alcoholic punch when Amy and Pearl come to talk to me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5fjsgkUF1f
— So, Meg, how was it ? Is Chad as good a shot as he seems ? Amy asks me, with a spark of curiosity in her eyes.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyjt5ltmaq
— What are you talking about ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTZyk5pAJH
— Of you and Chad half naked in his room ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6JTrWAptV1
— That’s not at all what you think ! Nothing happened ! Some idiots had spilled beer on me. I had to take a shower while Chad cleaned my dress and he was dressed in case you didn't notice ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZBFmbtmCet
It annoys me to have to justify myself as if I had committed a crime.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyMTkORaETW
— But of course ! Pearl replies, giggling with Amy before walking away towards other students in our class.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuUrYppJwR9
This story is crazy, and the worst part is that no one wants to believe me, not even my best friends, at least the ones I thought were real friends. The looks that I already found embarrassing became even more insistent, and shame invaded me. It’s a shame to feel this ! Sensing my discomfort, Chad comes to join me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEdlHicRiCj
— I'm going back.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdl1GpqUmZB
— But no, stay, you're not going to let these idiots ruin your evening ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKmjXLCEXM
He hugs me tightly to reassure me, but525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0lQ8P2YoT
I gently push him away. There are already enough comments as it is, there is no point in adding more.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYOUdRxTqJp
— No, I'm going back. See you tomorrow ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeM26dtz57t
Disappointed, he acquiesces. I kiss him on the tips of his lips as we usually do.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQhGBPghNK
— You don’t want me to take you home ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0brivKWKHj
— I need to walk...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2dobAMcuPo
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvo7vvQpA47
It feels good to be alone and to be able to enjoy the peace and quiet of the cool night. The moon just makes a crescent in the sky. Looking up, I admire the stars which, far from everything, don't care about the gossip that runs on Earth. Tears burn my eyes, I feel more alone than ever on this Earth which is definitely not running smoothly.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpoThnaDz9
— Did you need to get some fresh air ? A soft voice nearby asks, bringing me out of my reverie.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmDHCaheu4
Jessy is by my side, looking up to the sky.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1n8BXyPbC
— Yes. Exactly. You too ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbw6BJZzeI3
This is the first time I've seen him up close. Immediately, my heart races. A small diamond shines in his ear, replacing the cross he wore during the day. Two locks frame his forehead, falling in front of his eyes when he lowers his head. I know I shouldn't stare at him like that, but I can't help it. I feel like an insect attracted by a light that hypnotizes it. He looks at me, gives me a smile. Why do I feel so intimidated around him ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcFdXQKivNV
A breath of wind rises, making me shiver. Jessy takes off his black leather jacket and hands it to me, I put it on and thank him. Does he notice my trouble ? I don't know, but from his piercing gaze, I suspect he's enjoying the situation.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvlUppN5KE0
— Yes, I needed to get some fresh air too, I don’t really like crowds. I saw you leaving, I thought maybe you’d like some company ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡauGCr6y1TP
— If you want, I shrug casually while being happy that he noticed me. Jessy, is that right ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxbJ4JQy6zg
He nods with a smile.
— I'm Meg...
— Megan, I know.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrPaU5a0oq4
I look at him, surprised.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRr8NYkWy8C
— Good. What else do you know about me ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZJzMsUdpYo
— Let’s see… You’re the best student in class, and you’re dating the star player of the football team.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5u7UJ1FlvE
— You're good ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDiQBc8kBh
— I guess you must have heard something about me too ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCNKlL7F5Y
— Not much, actually. I just know that you are seventeen, that you have just arrived in Millisky and that you are repeating your school year.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dsTbEAwpn
— Everything is true. It's not that serious ? What upsets you..., he adds to my astonishment.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDdf1cCT0bh
— No, there are much worse things in life. It's nothing, just nonsense.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6JisR2h8Y
— If it’s so harmless, then why did you leave your boyfriend’s party ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOzOskyLKhR
— Maybe because, this evening, I saw the true faces of my so called friends. My confidence in them melted like snow in the sun.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe56KfmZhcX
Jessy sighs as she looks up again to look at the starry sky.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNg4SpXtEhN
— I know this feeling of disappointment well.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Sv4iMORWT
— Did this happen to you too ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm83EVZjCJQ
He seems surprised that I am interested in him and turns to me, burying his hands in the pockets of his pants.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGD293DRZzW
— To be betrayed, disappointed ? Oh yes ! Although I don't understand why your friends would turn their backs on you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ79kWbjUvBZ
— Haven't you heard the gossip spread by Amy and Pearl ? They told everyone that I slept with Chad. Even though I told them that this is not the case, they did not believe me, and worse, they preferred to continue to denigrate me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDZ90M8j8m
As I tell him this, I search his eyes to check if he is sincere or if he is making fun of me like the others.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RUqJ9IubZ
— I have learned to no longer listen, and even less believe, what people say out of pure malice or jealousy. I am convinced that you are telling the truth.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFTpL4uB1Hm
— You seem very sure of yourself for someone who doesn’t know me ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLPzHeVPKK
He locks his gaze on mine before responding : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIc4ZN1f0C2
— I see in you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrOJvcVYht
This response leaves me speechless and upsets me more than it should. Faced with him, with his words, I feel lost. Fortunately, we arrived on my street and I just want to be alone to try to analyze what I feel.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1LTnnyyjNr
— Thank you, I said, handing him back his jacket. And thank you for taking me home.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25kAzMoKgO
— At your service, he says, turning left while I continue straight.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTxeV8Iu8GU
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVYnQFrXrqX
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaNy3hDflXV
The following days, nothing erases this attraction which pushes me towards Jessy. This makes me feel so guilty that I try to focus on my relationship with Chad, without really succeeding. As for Jessy, I feel like he's been running away from me since the other night. He looks away as soon as I look at him and doesn't speak to me anymore. I don't know what I did wrong for him to ignore me like that, but it pains me a lot. Perhaps he also ended up believing the nonsense that was circulated about my relationship ? If that were the case, I would be extremely hurt.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu46GAx7xzC
It was during history class that the teacher gave me the opportunity to get closer to him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifAGQMYULr
— I asked each of you to write a presentation on the last lesson.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe6hapOWGgc
At these words, several students point to their copy on their table.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7u2S4QGZg
— Jessy, can you pick them up ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLF0QTEaN4
This one executes. When he reaches my height, his gaze finally anchors on mine. I feel like seconds are becoming minutes. At this very moment, I realize how much I've missed Jessy these past few days. His hand brushes against mine as I hand him my paper, making me want to grab it and never let go.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QBXcsOWEb
As if reading my thoughts, Jessy narrows his eyes slightly and purses his lips. Then he turns away towards the next table, breaking the spell that united us as the professor continues speaking : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXUPHqpSLMR
— To find out what you have learned from this course, I have prepared a written quiz for you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RtnsHflz6
Immediately, boos are heard.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjCqk1IZp0
— Yes, I know, I'm not nice. While you answer the questionnaire, I will go through your presentations and form teams of two. For next week, you will have to refine your different points of view, compare them, in order to share them in front of the whole class.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9UQFk80yC
Although I am a good student, I don't particularly enjoy being on the board in front of everyone else and am already worried about who I will have to work with. As long as it's neither with Amy nor with525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJM2soFXAIM
Pearl. I haven't spoken to them since the party at Chad's.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqOIOZZh9d
They tried to come see me on Monday but I totally ignored them. Even if I find myself alone most of the time, Chad does not share all of my classes, I prefer that to being poorly accompanied.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8gcI2gH9mP
For long minutes, I put these thoughts aside to concentrate on the questioning.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu68NXJXByx
When I finish, I raise my head and look behind me, towards Jessy who finishes a few seconds after me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPhEhPI3Ciy
The teacher notices us because he tells us : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNL9OjajI4h
— Alright. Megan and Jessy, you'll be teaming up next week. You can go.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpxbFORk5x
At the same time, we get up and put our homework on the teacher's desk before leaving the classroom.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzuHOyP01fP
I thought we were going to be able to discuss this project but already Jessy is quickly moving away.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMuS4HMQ5b
— Jessy, wait ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkVEesl862
He slows down, but doesn't stop.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL54YQM28QS
— We need to discuss how we are going to approach this presentation.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt1Z28Tr4kc
His shoulders relax and he exhales.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYca9nzqOxm
— I don't like working with others. So I suggest you do your part on your own, I will do the same and we will meet again before the next class to compare our points of view.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomcFSBDO8a
— Thank you for your proposal but I refuse. There's no way I'm going to get a bad grade because you're antisocial.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmmwLeLHVI
— I'm not…525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6x8lTpm4t1
Before he finishes his sentence, I raise an eyebrow which interrupts him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuoMoJaXuad
— Okay, maybe I am a little, he admits with a little smile. Alright, you win Megan.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQhkBffm0Ll
Feeling like I need to take advantage of my advantage before he changes his mind, I quickly scribble my address on a piece of paper and hand it to him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9GSVHsEAt
— Come to my place at the end of classes, we will be quiet to study.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo37XlO5UIr
— Thanks for the address but we could just as easily meet up after school and go to your house together.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpM268zuOpo
Why didn't I think of that ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9qkdcAJ3x
I refrain from slapping myself.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabYda3hON8
Embarrassed by my stupidity, I smile shyly. Jessy leans towards me, slips my address into his pocket and adds mischievously : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7tj7wYjWQS
— I'm keeping it anyway. You never know, you might get lost along the way.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtziUVgQxKg
I don't understand why just looking at him, talking to him, puts me in this state. I feel my cheeks on fire and I am certain that when I open my mouth, nothing but nonsense comes out.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDTKV8rlpDt
But what is happening to me ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJymercI3R
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppIEPe0qzM
During the next class, I feel Chad's gaze, sitting at the desk next to mine, weighing on me suspiciously. I do my best to appear comfortable and innocent until he hands me a paper.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQSxVtZmQ3
What's going on with Jessy ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdK95PHoPvd
Astonished, I wrote : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCO191mIqQ
What ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQuUx5JFJX
Chad's response was quick : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7wkvgziO3
Amy told me you two seem close and that I should be worried. It's the case ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQzvwj9KEh
Anger replaces disbelief. What the hell is his problem ? Is she not tired of taking care of my life, of making up stories for me ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP46DeAu3lo
No, not at all. We just have a presentation to make together. 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8jnw4FQAxe
A smile lights up Chad's features. I managed to reassure him, yet I fear I may not have been completely honest with him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLDD1S6zoWm
As I look at his profile, I have to recognize that my boyfriend no longer inspires in me the feelings that inspired me just a few months ago. I feel myself detaching myself from Chad, I come to wonder if I was only in love with him one day or if I have always confused love and friendship. Slipping my hands through my hair, I breathe deeply. The only thing I know for sure is that I am lost in my emotions.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFLzvAbtEz
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSrZBIQXVF
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzFg2TueEA
At the end of class, Jessy comes to join me, backpack on his shoulder and a book in hand.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoON6CrsiJ
— I love this book. I must have read it about ten times since last year, he tells me. I thought you might like to read it ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRGUEiYV5F
While walking the streets, I quickly skim a few pages.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5SAvkQ9uI
— Do you mind if I save it to read tonight ? I'll give it back to you tomorrow.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jgJSv3DaO
— On the contrary. It’s so rare that I meet people who like to read something other than comics.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLknj7eEFom
— I understand you. Comics are Chad's favorite reading.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rJdWAGFtR
— I'm not surprised, Chad seems more of an athlete than a cerebral one.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH2fablB1z8
I am left speechless.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zSEKAbx4s
— Are you always this frank ? Can't help but ask him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcP9420gyIO
He shrugs his shoulders while responding : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgu1rSru8Lz
— Very often. I hurt you ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNAPOh1aEk
I thought for a few seconds before answering him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmxAWwhMoC
— No. I must admit that it is the truth.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgGq4uG3qRT
His smile widens, making me melt a little more.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi8uWmQ7OJS
Arriving home, we sit in the living room and chat about the homework we have handed in. We both think we'll get good grades. My mother comes home from work and walks into the living room, surprising us. I suddenly feel uncomfortable being with a boy other than Chad under my parents' roof. I jump up, followed by my guest.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWSz4WQPy8
— Hey, Ch…, it’s not Chad, she smiled.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJ8HBnLpCm
— Mom, this is Jessy.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡajYjAJCTg7
They greet each other.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO8pV5FTp29
— We have a presentation to give to the whole class about the Second World War.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xKqlBCDsq
With a nod, Jessy confirms my words. Since my mother arrived, he hasn't said a word, and seems intimidated. This adds as evidence : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYs2FsVNYTR
— Jessy, are you staying to eat with us this evening ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfwhP8UvF8r
He shrugs his shoulders.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Y4hoRYluO
— I don't want to bother you…525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmX9jkOP5hm
— Don't worry, I still cook too much since Nick left for college.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2K88WahNY
— Nicolas is my older brother…525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv89zdJM3b6
— It would be a pleasure to have you with us. My husband is tired of being surrounded by girls.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvYFfSMcfCm
— Okay then, Jessy said, smiling. Thanks ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNvK7X3S6fN
A little later, he met my father, then Nina. When it was time to sit down at the table, without anyone telling her, Jessy naturally took a seat next to me. I control myself so as not to let my disorder appear in front of those close to me. I feel myself vibrate every time his arm brushes mine. From time to time, Jessy looks at me sideways and gives a little amused smile, and I immediately blush ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHXxUV4OsX4
The meal passes in a good atmosphere until Nina, as usual, says out loud what she is thinking : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKTtewj1im
— You're not bad, Jessy, but I prefer Chad. It is awesome ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVBArWQvgyo
— Nina ! We don't say that kind of thing ! Reprimands my mother.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvB8i5jACMq
— For what ? I tell the truth.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡauuTeQvuiR
— Chad is nice, Jessy responds politely.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyq2wNlO5p
— And he’s strong ! Nina continues, making me want to throw myself over the table and strangle her.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ZVufHiOgt
— It’s true, Chad is a great athlete, adds my father. He also taught Megan how to drive. Considering the number of guests at his party the other night, he's also very popular. He has everything going for him, this boy, says my father, whom I would like to strangle at the same time as my sister.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrHpwwcXnV3
— It’s true that he’s really lucky, Jessy whispers, looking at me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx7uDu8H1Z4
I stare at him, not knowing how to react. I have a sudden and insane desire to throw myself into his arms to kiss him, this idea scares me as much as his words made me happy. Also, I'm left speechless, which makes him smile more.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC0tpfsQgZ4
At the end of the meal, Jessy helps me clear the table, then asks me where the bathroom is. I tell him. My mother then approaches me and gives me a little smile.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TTJpOG7sg
— This boy is very nice, she comments quietly so that only I can hear. And very cute at that.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fSziKfn3b
I glance at him sideways, smiling.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Vegl9Fxg7
"I suppose you know what you're doing ? "525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqgTVO4QPE
— Not really.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZALakvfmlB
— Meg, you’re sixteen. You didn't make a lifelong commitment to Chad. You are all young, you have the right to be carefree. I was, at your age, and I didn't know your father until much later, when I decided to settle down.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1GzJewboC
— You know very well that I am too serious to let myself be guided by my emotions without having first thought for hours.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTS5AXqNple
— Yes, I know, my mother sighs. And at first glance, I would say that Jessy seems to be just like you.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9nggQgZfjo
— You think that…525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYiSvNSTbV
I want to ask her if she thinks Jessy is interested in me, but I leave it hanging when I see him coming back to us.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡshgrWRJ4R6
— Thank you very much for inviting me to your table. It's getting late, I'm going to go home.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYGsNjgw5Y
— Wait, I'm going to walk with you for a while.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMXmkvf6RU
Jessy nods before going to grab his jacket hanging on a hook in the entryway.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLSSxNljqvm
— Thanks again ! Have a good evening everyone, he says as he leaves.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLm1IR5Bde
— Megan ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡama6TuTLHS
I turn to my mother who is standing in the hallway, at the entrance to the kitchen.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyY9URRuz0
— I am sure of it ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDQHsuuD05
I give him a big smile.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaBrWHFkuvo
— She is sure of what ? Asks Jessy who heard everything from the porch.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXhh4mVXI3a
— Oh, you're welcome, just something I asked him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY7pXyMUD7x
Fortunately, he doesn't insist.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaX4VwOOymk
We walk down the sidewalk in silence.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzc2VpwjGGP
My neighborhood is a quiet place, where all the houses525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZl6SGA9ku
look alike with their little white fence surrounding the garden. Only the colors of the houses vary from one to another, sometimes white with blue shutters, sometimes brown with red shutters. Our family home is cream with green shutters. My father makes a point of maintaining it well, repainting it as soon as the paint shows signs of age, and mowing the lawn regularly. This corner of the city is not known for being the richest, but at least its inhabitants ensure that nothing can damage it. I love this quiet little town which seems to live as if in a cocoon where nothing serious ever happens and where the smallest event, like the arrival of Jessy, is experienced as big news. This thought pulls me out of my reverie and, turning back to my companion, I decide to question him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYS8XEWUxHa
— Did you move here alone ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYwiTBwyVuQ
This seems incongruous to me since he is only seventeen, but I never see him with anyone, not even in town.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ59AHoI0MrG
— No, I live with my mother.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJNygTHj9K
— And your father ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vP9wee1sw
— My father died when I was a kid.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaOvtQmA1r
— Sorry.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6sUMdEzWwP
— It's nothing. My mother remarried and I have a little brother, Jason, who is now seven.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZI1cjDeKNe
— So your father in law and your brother live with you ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0uH8OgHLF4
Jessy grimace. 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZYsQRpdr5F
— No, they stayed in Allentown.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqhW3tDTw4J
— For what ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡklhRNfXilG
Jessy gives me a big smile while answering : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsRwR5YKWAU
— Joker ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr8YlC0Kzh7
Preferring not to insist, I move on to other questions : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnfiW1Er3q
— Why did you leave Allentown ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQN761KDs3U
— Re joker ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5KT2kqDqN
— OK. I always see you alone... but you must have friends ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3C41W5MK6p
— You know, I just arrived and I don’t know anyone yet, except you. In Allentown, I had friends, or so I thought, but..., he interrupts himself, purses his lips, shaking his head : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDqrxk6IAK
— I don't want to talk about it... Let's just say, sometimes you think you know people and you're wrong.
— Like me the other night...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFssKpr92L9
Looking serious, he nods.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5bMoP6TaL
— So you’re from Allentown ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsSKEWz9yC
— Yes, I lived in a small neighborhood where everyone had known each other forever, a bit like this one. (He looks around.) Except that in town, we couldn't see the stars as well.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSBdxbXQb31
I follow his gaze, staring at the sky illuminated by hundreds of sparkling points that no cloud hides. I feel very small and fragile in the face of this immensity. It's strange to find myself next to this boy to whom I feel close and who, at the same time, intimidates me so much.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhykLbiDmMM
— Your family loves Chad very much, he said suddenly, breaking this magical moment. How long have you been together ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5jTqcDDQZ
I sit on the low wall bordering a house for sale.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIhkEUZbjaz
— My father was a big athlete in high school and I think he recognizes himself in Chad. My mother finds him cute and nice, and my sister is in love with him, I think ! (I smile.) He and I have known each other for a very long time, since kindergarten in fact…525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA5qHmqfuLL
— And you’ve always loved him, Jessy adds, sitting down next to me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Jwn7cF9lP
I blush and lower my head.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzDbfzXNrS2
— It’s complicated… But let’s talk about you instead. Did you leave a girlfriend in Allentown ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5BVoE4AOv
Jessy turns to me and raises his eyebrows, visibly surprised. I stare at him, both impatient and dreading his answer.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGC6C2qdEt
— Your question is strange...
— Why ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96CQ1frk80
— Because you're dating the perfect guy according to everyone around you, so I wonder what your questioning is hiding.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2tZLu29RK
— It wasn’t you who told me that you shouldn’t necessarily listen to what others say ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFCAjE1BE7
— Touché, he smiled. Let's say I had a girlfriend.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDY6jtjRRBk
— You still have ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7i90AdmUI
— Well no, we split up...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vFV6rpEqT
I don't give him time to finish his sentence as my lips are already on his. Immediately, he kisses me back.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwF6JmsUiep
His lips are soft and warm on mine, I feel him slide a hand to my waist, pulling me closer to him until, as suddenly as it began, he pushes me back forcefully before standing up abruptly. jump, visibly annoyed.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMq7r3vZ4g
— That’s not true ! Why did you do it ? He writes to himself while standing in front of me, hands on hips waiting for a response.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRPoENDv3O
— I don’t know, I said as sincerely as possible. Since I met you, I have felt lost. I don't know why but I feel like I've known you forever and this feeling totally upsets me. I was hoping you felt the same way I did.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxp6TzF86Pj
Far from calming down, Jessy walks away from me, walking as quickly as he can. I get up and run after him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEanKLy1HKk
— Jessy, wait ! What is happening ? Please don't tell me that kiss was that bad ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwiSRZVdzZ
He doesn't stop though. I grab him by one arm, forcing him to stop his way.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRP4Vf3faU
He glares at me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5oxjk0OAW
— I'm sorry if... I shouldn't have kissed you, but I honestly thought you wanted to too.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsh0G9hZqj
— It is, he whispers, staring at me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS1NcHdPEwM
— So where is the problem ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XHeZjfSc0
— I can not do that.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD5YAeudh7V
— But why ? I know that compared to Chad it's a bad thing but...525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2WKMc1MP2F
— It has nothing to do with him. The problem is me. I'm not made for love, he gets angry again. I gave too much, now that is forbidden to me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ919c8MOmLj
He frees himself from my hand before continuing on his way. Staying there, I say to him : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYXyNz9Mjd
— I don't understand ! You can't pretend to want to kiss me and then run away like that a second later. It's not me who made you suffer so why should I pay for what others made you endure ? I'm not your ex ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4r7BjhOxJ0
Abruptly, he stops his running, turns around before coming back towards me. His features are distorted by anger but I also read a form of pain there.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡydGrLAISXV
— No, you are not the one who changed my life and I in no way wish to become the one who changes yours in the same way ! My life is ruined Meg, I'm already at the end. I'm going to die, he adds when he sees that I don't understand his words.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhhdiEs5zbW
— Wh... What ? I stammer, in shock.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5u9Va35Hft
He gets closer. His face is only a few centimeters from mine.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcR7XKmTq4
— Meg, I'm HIV positive. I have the AIDS virus, he admits quietly so that no one else can hear him, although the street is deserted. So stay away from me, believe me it's better ! 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5rqyn0Clp
He leaves as quickly as possible. Soon night envelops it completely. For a long moment, I stay there, dismayed, unable to make the slightest gesture, no longer knowing what to think. His words seem to spin in my head like a wild merry go round that no one can stop. I don't know how long I stand on that sidewalk looking in his direction long after he's gone.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnTUXLrKFj
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwCYDDznYNO
525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJe7OMHJTSB
When I get home, I try not to let anything show and lock myself in the kitchen. I thought I would be safe, but as soon as I closed the door, my mother opened it and stuck her head in.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIpWZchI6r
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're very pale, aren't you sick ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZwMttfK1Y0
— Everything is fine. I miss Nicolas, I would like to talk to him.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVB2CyKzUQ
Understanding the message, my mother nods and closes the door behind her. Immediately, I grab the phone and dial my brother’s number. Luckily he answers after two rings.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpteuyo0oOG
— Hello ? he says, happily.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenu3sxhFb0
— Nick, it’s me.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMg2xkRfUkG
I'm having a hard time keeping the tremors in my voice at bay.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRDxClhmgs
— Meg, what’s going on ? He worries.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPbUfjzC0C
The day I met Jessy, I told my brother that same evening. He seemed happy that a boy other than Chad was messing with me. For some reason, Nick always grimaced at my relationship with Chad. 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCS7DKYVP9x
— Jessy came to the house for dinner this evening... 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNx6YtZI8v9
— Oh, he sighs, he threw you away.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAtNPzrVFH
I think about the way I kissed him and feel myself blushing again. If I had known how he was going to push me away, I would never have let myself be carried away by my desire.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7ts8BB8Aj
— Yes, but that’s not the worst, I sob. Jessy admitted to me that she was sick.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VSYBP5lSU
Realizing the horror of the situation, I fall to the ground. I am not afraid of AIDS, I know that I risk nothing. But I am terrified for Jessy, for his future which is likely to be short. My brother doesn't speak, he gives me time to calm down. When my sobs dry up, I continue : 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8jcIw4jSaz
— Jessy is HIV positive, I blurt out in one breath.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXNk1Fufge
A gasp of surprise escapes my brother.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrchC0TQHD
— Okay, he breathes, making me understand that he’s thinking about the situation. What are you going to do ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rH2SEEXfl
— I don't know. Nick, I need to know your opinion.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYhTboe8Ql
— I admit that I didn't expect that at all. Do you see yourself turning your back on him ? 525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4B8PID2nkU
— I wouldn't be able to.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtZG5acLlL
— Meg, I know this probably isn't the kind of relationship you imagined, but based on what you've told me so far about this guy, I think right now he especially needs support and friendship. Don’t reject him because he doesn’t match your ideal.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dsR01xk3r
— Exactly, he corresponds to my ideal and the fact that he is ill changes nothing. If I am devastated it is because AIDS is an incurable disease. I don't want him to die, Nick, I'm crying again.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesvz0bnpVd
I am aware that I have only known him for a short time but, without being able to explain it, he has already marked my existence.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6z0MfSkGho
— Come on, little sister, don’t cry. For now, Jessy is alive and, even if he keeps you at a distance, I'm sure he would be happy to have you in his life. Try to make him smile while he's here. He must need to think about something other than this crap.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcVzgqGTBb
— You're right. Nick, what I confided to you must absolutely remain between us. No one should know.525Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eXChWNm53
— Finally you know me ! Come on now tell me how he dumped you ! He laughs as I bite my lip in shame.
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