在TG上，大家互相交換照片，今年的動漫節我只去了兩天。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZt8DaJfXLt
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZapNg89Cle
Annie看完我cosplay男角和女角的照片，她看到其中一張我cosplay著女角跟一另一名女coser的合照，便回應：551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IKzh9A0xl
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXT4VL0YI7q
Annie：你隔離嗰條女好靚，你啲frd嚟？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcLvJOCHFG5
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4P3fpYi0wb
我：梗係唔係啦，啱啱先識嘅（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvc49uIfd02
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡypy6AwKNcv
接著Annie也給她的化妝照我看，又交流著化妝心得。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr58FwHyPNX
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFQmfAvAhe
論「擠牙膏式」聊天戰術，對我來講cosplay、化妝、寫網絡小說，這三大話題是最長壽命的話題，能用來談很長、很長的時間。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5OSJ7w1dk
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6MZzRG6JT
總之，我最終目的就是要把她約出來見面！551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL1DGk8CkkV
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhOUnFa9UU9
每次我以cosplay裝扮出席這類活動時，都必定認識到新朋友，男女都有，也是同樣cosplay的人，然後他們都會跟我交換IG。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehWCaZldEZ
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6qkcEhBFt
在我的IG裡，粉絲頗多，主要有兩類：一是從cosplay圈認識的人，二是我從網上寫小說而招來的讀者粉絲和其他作者。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlhdIMfNxR
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXHptQAUQR
每逢我發佈小說的宣傳文，只有十幾個讚好，但當我發佈cosplay照時，不論是男裝還是女裝，總會引來多3倍的讚好，真是人靠衣裝。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFjfro2uUyg
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBGoDvhwbH
因此有人會覺得我的朋友圈子大，但其實這只不過是假象；因為我都很少與人會面，平日頂多都是跟我唯一好友Jason見面或獨自一人到cafe消閑。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzMUH6yenEY
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWaSMCLwNyo
Annie：你個樣本身可以好女仔，出街實冇人知你係偽娘。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxnaPglOkIw
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0GR991Jpm
我：但冇計啦我太高喇，實出賣男兒身㗎（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0CsHYCF8h
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqlh7QBozVR
Annie：其實我好憎啲男仔睇樣551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Qq6fmKohK
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaah37Cc0ym
我：做咩突然間講呢啲嘅？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXFl0Ga2nI
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnz7EGqZir1
Annie：以前試過交換完相之後，條仔嫌我肥，就即block我551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1IXj8wFSI
Annie：我真係好自卑551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKPAo2Ts0u
Annie：啲人成日都同我講，話我個樣唔差，叫我扮下靚就有551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEDh7VNwP1
Annie：佢哋口口聲話唔介意肥閪，但係行動上就好誠實咁話我知，佢哋跟本介意。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC66JSHjUB0
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAYCADFNNa
其實我也很清楚知道，這個世上沒有絕對的零歧視。很多時候人只是出於禮貌，而在表面的社交應酬上，包裝自己的說話，但心裡仍然保留真正的自己。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmQpqYpGLCU
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNr9M5T3zm
所以我的世界觀是：適者生存，與其努力去改變世界，倒不如學習保護自己。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrxl9ssqM4
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGut5bd6t7
偽娘也會被歧視嗎？當然有，只是我比較幸運，身邊的人大致上都是禮貌跟我相處；或可能有人心底裡不喜歡，但我相信既然有人不喜歡，那麼總有人喜歡，每個人總會找到自己的一套生存之道，多訓練自己的敏感度，便可容易地觀察人心，從而使自己作更好的決定。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7BqMFh0Kf
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssHl6JDD4U
所以在前面說到創建Tinder帳號時，我都說，即管大膽表明自己是偽娘身份，當有人被我吸引進來之後，再慢慢過濾誰是真正交友。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPhIi37nZG
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFLFoh52HhA
或許有人問：你這樣不辛苦嗎？不做偽娘就好了。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeC2H846lt
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqbT0BqQKFn
我會反駁：食得鹹魚抵得渴，為心靈滿足而選擇紋身的人，會害怕生活上的阻礙而放棄嗎？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqlmPbSaiZ
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIOhWs70FuP
我們又繼續聊，然後我嘗試開玩笑地拋出一句。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4bu4nly72
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlRy6Wn2h9N
我：我好想食豬扒飯。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR4iVpS3TL2
我：不過我想食你件豬多啲（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUatOp7DhXN
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0JCWDarhh
Annie：我唔係豬扒！！551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIpAGbRPBt
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1StRYlwB7
糟糕了，我講錯說話，焦慮的我想嘗試修復。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dV2WzmRH9
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoE9o8SYpiL
我：豬扒都有豬扒嘅好（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqfbDywstg
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjunUHxoQMK
Annie：可以啪啪聲嘛（大笑551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJzX1BaiV70
Annie：同埋，我呢啲高嘅係叫坦克車唔係豬扒551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapBDzAglU0
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡno1jB7iauJ
最原始的對話版本我已經忘記了，也刪了；總之大概記得，我以「豬扒」這個詞語來開玩笑，說過幾句；但是勾起了Annie的怒火，而我又嘗試熄滅。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzo6UIwbGwp
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1PIgqCGcd
我：噢，原來我一路以嚟攪錯咗豬扒呢個term嘅用法。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjuVvzFLFg1
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhcTwMGwKPc
沒辦法下，我只好裝傻混過去。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLeuodZUtxZ
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtHoYN58jH
本以為如此便蒙混過關，於是我們又如常地相處下去。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkm2VNuj0XG
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJ7jtW2cDx
接著幾天後，我又約了一個攝影師在派對房裡拍攝泳裝照片；但是照片要修圖，要等待一陣日子才有。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtrmSbMcZuv
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5cYagfF69
這晚我又跟Annie聊到半夜三更。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKMaONiXnU
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2XT3mcYYn
Annie：你去影泳衣咁有冇相？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhOmoxO9vJR
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxduUFnGZp
我如實地交代暫未有相片，只有一張我當場的自拍照，是上身照，相中的我看起來與一個穿三點式的女人無異。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtigOtrEnAM
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtN3NfJDod
艷濃的妝容、長長的啡捲髮、以及黑色三點式泳裝，露出大面積白皙的肌膚，正正是我當時的打扮。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIUmfROZNI
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd4qiRp5hr6
Annie：慘囉慘囉，連你都咁靚。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQ0IL80v1l
Annie：我一見到有排骨精就有種想保護佢嘅感覺551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2NQnMKAsb
Annie：驚佢俾風吹走551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT4cw23lDVE
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNMsL0OJl7
我：你講緊邊個排骨呀？（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXmMpp8CwMR
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKvpQgJ4Do
Annie：我好唔中意啲男仔自大551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwsCb3J3vm
Annie：見過有啲男仔喺網上露佢自己上身551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkRHTCf7sZg
Annie：佢以為自己有六舊，有好大條J551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY9qf7Dhcrx
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAw1XgEasqg
我：俾著係我直情同人講：我冇J㗎（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJZJGSaj7o
我：冇六舊肌同大J，咁咪做返女人囉（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEyDmYq3440
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ77Ckm7iTsY
我不像一般的某些直男，在網上放出袒露上身的大漢照。不穿衣服，我都會，只是我不會這樣表達而已。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6i6Vz5S9D
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFe53NBeVvV
事實上，我的確在Tinder放過一張三點式泳裝照，還有假髮和妝容；並不是因為我對自己男性特徵（例如6腹肌）沒自信，而純粹是因為我喜歡美麗的自己。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT86NSsMarD
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR38PpKT2Jh
以火影忍者的語言說，大多數男人都是使用鳴人的「逆後宮術」，而我則只是在用「後宮術」，一個「逆」字只是男版和女版的分別。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5oW3OAtUBK
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb65IMmcT4O
Annie：半夜三更瞓唔著，突然性起，傾吓性？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1xRnfiWsZ
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVhtWCXaXN
我：你做乜咁突然想講18禁呀？M到？（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6GBq52CCL
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7QfJ4GA86
Annie：係呀，你又知？（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVIlylEnz1o
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM3DcxaCFyI
我：我憑直覺亂估咋551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9jELbEGWAS
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpnm5E1yNA
Annie：好奇想知你唔打飛機㗎咩？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7161ZQ92wD
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqCjtSibSi
我思索了一會，然後回覆。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhB0Ncbvdzf
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3EHlssY8X
我：打呀，但我嘅性幻想唔係男女扑嘢咁簡單。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SpkDeoGYE
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7tsw5dbnmM
我的性癖，是戀物。事實上對於女性的胸、陰道，不是主要的興趣；因此如果有大胸妹子在我面前引誘我，是沒有用的；唯一能刺中我「死穴」的只有女裝。551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFvUVaZlBp
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMF1dbCufw
Annie：我屋企都有兩件sex toy551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYsxaP0Ltm
Annie：我試過自己裝上假J然後插落第二條女度551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfy1dVqkLH
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0OwzGaKLzz
我：你本身都係bi？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWveAsZAQg
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVzd9KUiJB
Annie：唔係嘅，只係貪屌女仔好玩（大笑551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVa3ornhc0P
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsr6RYSQi1G
我：話說今日我去私影時都就嚟出水551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfylUqJ8z9S
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMiWGrPKqK
Annie：你都冇閪，點出水？551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡklApw7uIdw
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxcu9qcEmL
我：人工閪😏551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkE4dyvSavB
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5bW2QiOtF
Annie：😳😳551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvS4QCWh0o
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9oaam91782
我：你嚟上我啦（笑喊551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNybNpvs7Km
551Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWOB6dLvDF
今晚看似她已經把我說的「豬扒」拋諸腦後；另一方面，我們已經聊了1.5個月，我三番四次約會她，她都不出來，漸漸地我也被磨去了耐性和動力。我開始有點迷惘，下次應該如何提出約會，還是只保持網上關係就罷了？8964 copyright protection547ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4OnESqrK7 維尼

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