學校的音樂老師曾經說過一句話:「作曲家所創作的音樂就是要讓聽眾體會他創作時的心情。」前陣子我跟我爸聊天的時候提起了這句話,我忘記我當時在跟他聊什麼,然後我爸說:「就是要開開心心的才好啊,作那麼多聽了會讓人難過的東西幹嘛?電視劇也是要正面一點才好啊。」但我覺得,不管是讓人心情愉快的還是讓人感覺沉重的音樂還是電視劇,都有存在的必要,就像人負面的情緒有被人看到跟接納的必要。而且沉重的東西往往會給人帶來成長,就像讀歷史,歷史上有很多令人悲傷的事件,當我們知曉的時候總會覺得很沉重很悲傷,但我們也會因此知道要避免事情重蹈覆轍,有些電視劇在探討社會議題,因此會顯得沉重,但它會讓社會大眾重新關注這些問題,這些「讓人看了不開心」的的東西,不是很有意義嗎?我爸似乎覺得,一切負面能量的東西都不應該存在,就像他覺得不應該為任何事哭泣和憤怒一樣,因為那樣是損害自身的行為,但哭泣和憤怒是一種情緒的表現,所以不是一種該被接納的行為嗎?為什麼不能該生氣的時候生氣,該哭泣的時候哭泣呢?聽到那句話,我才明白我生氣和哭泣的時候我爸為什麼總是說:「生氣(哭)是沒有必要的行為。」而不是安慰我了,大概是他覺得負面的東西是不該被別人看見和知曉的吧。
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