《赤足的庭院》（2）91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtnu8MOLye
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZofyffSbj
  91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tkDyh50h8
00391Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjTFGRkbIF
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqQn61MXzZ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26vF8zkOPU
  我對故鄉的印象僅僅是印象。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjm1hbFzTp2
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDk22ObVoT
  因為那裡的事物並不是被人實務性的記憶下來，而是作為更不完全的東西，留在心底的某些角落。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKBPsU9MpED
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpoE3pHahW
  我記得潮水的味道和海浪等聲音，沙子的觸感，樹梢下刮起的微風，夜晚時絕對黑暗的地面，和成為那個時間裡唯一存在事物的星和月。魚腥味、油輪的廢氣、風雨來的時候，所感到的恐懼。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3O6hWC2AfB
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3V3mL7oCg2
  我的故鄉作為一個印象，我記錄在腦中，知道自己總有一天會以某個型式的遠離它。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIujYTDtyXQ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwL688nbvuJ
  但那不是指現在。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamjmguO5Zf
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIBJW7m0Bg
  就算獨自一人逃到台北，看過了城市鮮豔的夜色，耳裡塞滿城市的吐和吸，我還是知道，自己並沒有真正的遠離故鄉。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yqo22bSef
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFE7kD1N8s
  91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIemFFTgCJ4
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnz6GfmDazG
  「嗯⋯⋯可以問你的名字嗎？」小舫姐說她昨晚沒能睡著。在平常的那張餐桌上，她癱軟的用雙手撐著臉。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm6qTdcqNTH
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp49FcsLR3M
  我一邊解釋著自己的事，一邊看著她疲累的試著聽進我所說的。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0uSY8NMrg
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡptyvI4IXy1
  看她渴望睡眠的樣子，我感到有些內疚。她睡不好大概就是因為我。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3lzOdgKQo
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWoPYltuc9s
  昨晚，小舫姐讓我暫時待在她家借住一晚。公寓的房間很小，只有一張床鋪。我原本堅持要睡地板，不過被她拒絕了：「落到這副德性的人少跟我客氣。」。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1Iu922D8m
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHlFYfNpLs
  多了一個人在床上，一定很不習慣。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7oJzPkSh5R
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzNHslYVal
  但是昨晚，還好我實在是筋疲力盡，不然大概會整夜無法入睡。年紀的問題。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCyJPfquKS
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7O0WTGXlgb
  「李靜。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXE89ITDokW
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFyA6nbFn2
  「噢，好娘。李靖或是李欽不是更適合男孩子嗎？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR5Oal0oJHZ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkdL9af6jRE
  「⋯⋯」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgNj7cM0Hw
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB9HOsFF80Y
  「不過還好。要是是李靖或是李欽的話，昨天晚上我大概就危險嘍。」我說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeLoTSF4twQ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOCWvj833iA
  「哈⋯⋯」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgfjGTPuR3
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEee1samlM
  當然，昨晚的我本來就沒有對他抱著任何期待。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iKa4ng0lJ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsVpQ7JcCdP
  只是回想起來，那確實是很荒謬的決定。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIda4zV7VLT
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMFARTY2dY5
  「一個23歲的女人，讓16的陌生少年上了自己的床鋪。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrfvRNFNQur
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcbPRsfCrCc
  寫成文字或是作為台詞被唸出來，大概都不會影響它的離譜。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7WHKv8p7cO
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnp3aMNTQWo
  「那麼，李靜。你打算就這麼住下來嗎？」她問，十分嚴肅的。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBSnDGYbeEk
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTbBNW2Lk3
  我搖搖頭。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1rprmXY3e
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9qTlGuP6P
  「靠著你偷出來的錢，青年旅館還能住多久呢？要是在那之前，你依然不想回到自己的故鄉，你打算怎麼辦？」還不想，的話。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡikYIivKt97
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGAZrHqe62
  面前的少年低著頭，一語不發。我大概知道他在思考著什麼。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvei414736
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0yLxfZuYH
  「我遲早會遠離我的故鄉⋯⋯」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9oaXzxh1G
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm931VlcSaJ
  「但不是由這個方式。對吧？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJ4PV3hpxc
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1RhxrUOcF
  「是的，所以⋯⋯」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5e5Z0GiOo4
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FJvQ9v2VR
  「怎麼辦呢？」這次不是為了捉弄人，她露出溫柔的微笑。「在錢花完之前，你得思考噢。來到這個混亂的場所，你能得到什麼？或是追求什麼。」她說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jsFd1ZNTZ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGPXYCGNy5I
  「小舫姐，妳常常離家嗎？」他突然一臉佩服的看著我。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Dt6FyZ0fS
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKW5QOoNsB4
  「這是什麼蠢問題？」啊，說錯話了。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYU8p4HDTi
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOjS3p0SmDb
  「嗯⋯⋯不是，總感覺妳很熟練的樣子。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0EN9Q4JZVM
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tg6YaKzRU
  「怎麼可能。」她說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXgswzJ5qeB
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLK8yJCbAmC
  然而這是事實。16歲之前，我離家過無數次，每次都是無功而返，只帶回挫折跟疲勞的身體。然後，到了他的這個年紀，我幾乎像是投降了一樣。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogqQ9c2JCK
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHbKgHd4UG
  好好的準備了考試，盡了全力去考大學。畢業之後也找到了穩定的工作。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BpoV4N9Kj
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSMAhjwKIX
  這7年來的生活十分穩定。而且那是不容置疑的正確。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOORa6deA4
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXkTR2P5Ce
  直到他出現的那天。我再次質疑起自己作的決定。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRU1ZVURlFe
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP3GqSE5Xiv
  長時間離開過我的這份自我懷疑又找上門來，然而我絲毫不比之前的自己成熟或是冷靜。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuYf5FpQ8P
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHOv9c8FjC
  但是看著他，我總有一種感覺。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUiSuw0N8y
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGDEPoc0Pu
  「大概沒問題的。我想⋯⋯。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT12SyUp2JU
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnklj5d7prZ
  沒有理由的，我這麼相信著。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSJMZxuWAL
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7od8vcsJE
  因為，注視著她時，海嘯和風的呼嘯聲就會從腦袋中消失。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoL73WjDujl
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdIA9rRcsKV
  91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ3gy4ZKbEk
  91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpTmnkeXeJ
00491Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFypgrKmQZo
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpUArsnksJV
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJb5S55MzJS
  「阿靜，你是獨生子嗎？」最近每到中午，她都會走到我身邊，把我從樓下的那個陰暗的角落，帶到樓上的用餐區。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUE9JVYnL0
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXo3kKlNMT
  「是啊。」我吃著員工餐，回應的問題。到台北之後，這是我第一次吃到泡麵以外的熱食。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNM7Fckv30
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIymx7fh5fn
  「好吃嗎？」她用頭指了指我的盤子。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBfyTqbbpyM
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2YTNo2xtLi
  「嗯，非常美味。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFOAnh9usLW
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhvZTHxoGT
  「那就好。」她又塞了一口飯到口中。「你看這個。」她拿出手機。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBkLuSH2eZ
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xjnXrnOht
  滑開桌面，她打開某個定期回報全球衛星雲圖的程式。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYT6nrPnwZw
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOshlParB7
  不知道為什麽，程式剛打開所指定的地方是新幾內亞，但是她好像不太在意。說實在話，我也不太在意，我滿腦子在想桌面照片是哪個作家的書。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRhuKqlTNj
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGh8KhdsJ5s
  然後她讓我看了台灣附近。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM32l1yQVH3
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNqIYL1w2T
  「一次來兩個颱風噢，很要命對吧？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmahPEDnWNo
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRo3bIL2eq
  「嗯⋯⋯。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Ifrq0jjd8
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBTOUDp8fv
  「可是啊，你看這個。預測路線說，它們會剛剛好⋯⋯像這樣，一個往上、一個往下，躲開台灣噢。」她用手指畫出線條，語氣雀躍的說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZTwzFuBSfA
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrL7psecfph
  「真的是這樣就太好了。」他皺著眉頭說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSIpsXDR2UW
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0EaiK8hDIg
  肯定沒事的。看到她笑著這麼說，我的心不知為什麼就這麼安心下來了。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLSx8ILjEz
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNG4TyLkmga
  我從二樓的圍欄往一樓看，看到不少人離開座位，或是把書本丟在一旁，往樓上來。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡov2tJKv5k8
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGx28BgXarP
  離席的人一個個往同一個方向去，每個人離開前的習慣和走路的姿勢、服裝的外型，從腳的移動到眼神，每個人都有所不同，卻做著一樣的事。我很喜歡這幅光景。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtNWJ02WTv
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWoS2RLKB7
  「阿靜，獨生子是什麼樣的感覺啊？」我的注意回到她身上。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPetiUOYgAc
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lIvR5bmds
  「什麼？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8BzynZrSTV
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGTohP4TOr9
  她又問了一次。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOXTEGBvxP
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJ4NF6XwhH
  「啊⋯⋯獨生子啊，不知道，小舫姐不是獨生女嗎？感覺很像啊。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dskMOhbpV
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKjewe5FRN0
  「什麼意思？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡULx3HrRsNG
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvpXwdI7Pr
  「對那種需要一個人鑽研的事物比較感興趣。」孤僻的怪人。我從來沒看見她和其他圖書館員熱絡的交談過，說不定，她在這唯一的朋友就是我了。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGAbNKZDWBy
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaE7S6b8qAF
  「噢，這樣啊⋯⋯還有呢？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbwRMtyvsM
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsF71qJBFK
  「感覺很有自己的想法。」不顧別人的感受。從來不看場合的捉弄人，不管話題或是氣氛，只要她覺得好玩就好。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97rBbN3BdC
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHXrEgi7nu
  「這樣啊，可是我不是噢。」她笑著說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXoWk2UY0d
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDd8rIFZsxp
  「是嗎？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXdxWn7L3s
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrZkA9TQAt
  「嗯，我有一個弟弟⋯⋯長得跟你很像噢。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiktijh988K
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQdsj0idJq
  她這麽的同時，皺起眉頭，仔細的觀察的我的五官。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7prH92IRY
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZL1gIxDKhY
  91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJtdA4oBdj
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwN148FXZRR
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96al7jFqsy
  果然很像。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NMkwm2p4F
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWnvsPrXhu
  午餐時間結束，他作為暫時的圖書館員，整理書架時的那副神情，和弟弟替我收拾行李時的表情一模一樣。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSepijuLL8g
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNeMrI4f7rj
  那是我第四次的離家出走。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9254HVvARK
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡllkD0j5sDo
  準備離開家門前，剛升國中的弟弟，突然擅自打開我的行李箱。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MTfUDkSHT
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVM1BW1bpF
  我害怕會錯過父母不在家的時間，對他斥責了幾句。但是他很冷靜，說要替我檢查。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFayXjLigk
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfkjcTHYHxJ
  「少了牙膏和食物⋯⋯啊，火車上要看的書呢？姊，妳沒有書活得下去啊？」這時的我，為了大學的志願在鬧家庭革命。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedsj5sH2lD
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmzYsPdePW
  我喜歡文學。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy0MnUj34at
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7iDucMbeo
  那個時候，驅動我一切不成熟和自私的動力，都來自這麼一個模糊而膚淺的理由。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8P2THhF3lc
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0KjVcolP21
  因為這個尚未成形的夢想⋯⋯那個時候，更適合的詞可能是妄想。因為它，我把自己的容身之處給否定了。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3SAlq0be9u
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbBCszr1X5
「 我無法待在那個否定我一切的地方。」我那個時候是這麼告訴弟弟的。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJT9ICE2pZr
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcLDhGqdhC
  我看著他替我收拾書本和盥洗用具後，他堅持要送我到車站。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFPiyZGJf0
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEy1SMJTyJ
  於是我在車站冷冰冰的塑膠椅上，用極為平淡的語氣對還是國中生的他說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCMz9mV54A
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT43DBHxTQe
  「嗯⋯⋯從妳的角度來看，待在家裡確實是很痛苦吧。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYFl3h0IvS
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7XyAUqdJrf
  我沒有說話，於是他繼續說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghT73EXG8n
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcW2jAX1VaA
  「我希望妳能快樂。當然，我也希望爸爸媽媽快樂⋯⋯嗯⋯⋯怎麼辦呢？」他笑著對我說。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBeCHvLBe9c
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIZ6Z3siTed
  那時的我沒有意識到，他的笑之後有著多麼巨大的重量。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bP3epRaQg
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡETBIOwC23F
  也許因為我，他時時刻刻對自己的存在感到矛盾。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFU6qjJOYt
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUcBLGOGPZC
  但我被自己的夢想遮住了耳，沒能聽出他的求救。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0usBm2GyO
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOja9m1bXwM
  「謝嘍。」搔搔他的頭，我抱住他瘦小的身軀。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34yykfxAtr
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlpdFBopwvJ
  「姊⋯⋯早點回來噢。不要餓到肚子。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XfjvP56qC
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLzS8m9kRf
  「嗯，你也是。」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYEoiTlNE1c
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkkV0tMFkq
  我記得，那個冬天，台北第一次下了雪。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQsGHu8um6b
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVdRRpUNDBI
  雖然是很少、很細的冰線，但那確實，是貨真價實的雪。91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkhH5DUSed
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OblKrqr5W
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYT7lC5rPBO
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLltcNrIZ4
  「小舫姐⋯⋯這個算是小說學術類還是偉人自傳啊？」91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVHWVssRNjs
91Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9C95Xj3czT
  「嗯？我看看噢。」8964 copyright protection87ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxhB5TtTOy 維尼

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