天亮,上班。649Please respect copyright.PENANAAnTE3UEJJ0
649Please respect copyright.PENANA6SXZh41C40
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。649Please respect copyright.PENANA6Y6rwWplE0
649Please respect copyright.PENANAnCZmTipurf
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。649Please respect copyright.PENANASVpv0PE2oA
649Please respect copyright.PENANAXUiwDVY6LF
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。649Please respect copyright.PENANAcgrJpxMBpO
649Please respect copyright.PENANAYIv108Fc90
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。649Please respect copyright.PENANAFlwVaf8o9C
649Please respect copyright.PENANAF4O9ZfSjyZ
看不見,罷。
天黑,下班。649Please respect copyright.PENANAXzrlJxkyRQ
649Please respect copyright.PENANAtWOfTKviFo
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。649Please respect copyright.PENANAXo972q7Nnj
649Please respect copyright.PENANAVGzGLrP06p
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。649Please respect copyright.PENANAvC3G3G4B5a
649Please respect copyright.PENANAoeoV8oplEi
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……649Please respect copyright.PENANAr4xe61iYIw
649Please respect copyright.PENANAHis2lpolqS
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。649Please respect copyright.PENANABwNMlOLVKM
649Please respect copyright.PENANAvyeCVDsHkJ
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」649Please respect copyright.PENANApMvtrehxSG
649Please respect copyright.PENANAi2US8WB755
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。
公司,午飯時間。649Please respect copyright.PENANAVYfvaMdhcU
649Please respect copyright.PENANA1KSESIOAAa
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……649Please respect copyright.PENANAtBtLX56Tai
649Please respect copyright.PENANANk1ST3gpLT
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?649Please respect copyright.PENANAoRGvJ3OiSp
649Please respect copyright.PENANAWA6V58xGEj
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。649Please respect copyright.PENANAKuDsbyIXZj
649Please respect copyright.PENANAAlfDKPL58b
還是……649Please respect copyright.PENANATNAfr7SL2K
649Please respect copyright.PENANAEhLTkyCkqJ
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!
公司,工作。649Please respect copyright.PENANA8KBdzk0RN9
649Please respect copyright.PENANAmKKH6sGjSy
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。649Please respect copyright.PENANAUyTQmSrIV3
649Please respect copyright.PENANAzZYczH1w5u
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。649Please respect copyright.PENANAY5uRGSCx9M
649Please respect copyright.PENANAuTmgTOyNJJ
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。649Please respect copyright.PENANA3aDA3ItRNq
649Please respect copyright.PENANAOc9NFPa0LN
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。649Please respect copyright.PENANAAnl1dGlpXv
649Please respect copyright.PENANAqAI9dWx3O4
快意,笑了。
酒吧,喝酒。649Please respect copyright.PENANA6hI80ZqQLO
649Please respect copyright.PENANAm7Yz3oImyq
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。649Please respect copyright.PENANARYHkrIu3pH
649Please respect copyright.PENANAHv3SZxs9Ur
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。649Please respect copyright.PENANAX6t1QUegWw
649Please respect copyright.PENANApByuRt2F0f
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。649Please respect copyright.PENANAqcUw9Irmuf
649Please respect copyright.PENANAgR4WOc6SHg
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。649Please respect copyright.PENANAFOqn8Bf4le
649Please respect copyright.PENANAiTLbcKFFVi
醉倒。649Please respect copyright.PENANAnLLkeEMq91
649Please respect copyright.PENANAMntBlj4PgX
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……649Please respect copyright.PENANAAIrDqI9lzi
649Please respect copyright.PENANAixDhAl77SK
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」649Please respect copyright.PENANAU5jzV8p83B
649Please respect copyright.PENANAWZC0ODctfC
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。
假期,醫院。649Please respect copyright.PENANAb5eU42coKb
649Please respect copyright.PENANA5msbf95X3H
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。649Please respect copyright.PENANAbJTIErr5yw
649Please respect copyright.PENANArr1i9b8ogA
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。649Please respect copyright.PENANAfHMl6qu3qf
649Please respect copyright.PENANA7jyP4nCxqh
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」649Please respect copyright.PENANAReVZlN67aC
649Please respect copyright.PENANA7UsVYlwyBm
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。649Please respect copyright.PENANAOf8zzOhPhz
649Please respect copyright.PENANAmAs2jmX26s
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。649Please respect copyright.PENANA84krfZg66v
649Please respect copyright.PENANACg5qsXrdtK
死寂。649Please respect copyright.PENANAv3QAMUrPom
649Please respect copyright.PENANArffVuh8U5r
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。
回家,晚飯。649Please respect copyright.PENANA2f8Fp2O2Yf
649Please respect copyright.PENANAPPcj9SXOAE
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。649Please respect copyright.PENANAM3GaLlc5rj
649Please respect copyright.PENANAqgUzAo8PyX
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」649Please respect copyright.PENANA6ZP8FZDhba
649Please respect copyright.PENANAvbuzFbrd7t
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。649Please respect copyright.PENANABxYnNf9t1a
649Please respect copyright.PENANATCqSKWPXRZ
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。649Please respect copyright.PENANALoPojo3f2V
649Please respect copyright.PENANAzL7d9JMNPw
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。649Please respect copyright.PENANAaZ5HK0w1gB
649Please respect copyright.PENANAJbtblwQ4rp
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。649Please respect copyright.PENANAxZ1EaSD9A2
649Please respect copyright.PENANA7pMwGLvITX
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。
男友家,床上。649Please respect copyright.PENANAZw25dwiPN5
649Please respect copyright.PENANAiTqPKdd820
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。649Please respect copyright.PENANAFPkADKM3sk
649Please respect copyright.PENANAgzBgeaOiFj
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。649Please respect copyright.PENANAs7xDmRYHeA
649Please respect copyright.PENANAyma1qizm6o
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」649Please respect copyright.PENANAg6kIgfUJQM
649Please respect copyright.PENANApYHDbtNUAV
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。649Please respect copyright.PENANAmAkKPXlGaN
649Please respect copyright.PENANAWXropxdftp
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。649Please respect copyright.PENANA2V3SJsTRrh
649Please respect copyright.PENANAuFljjJYQg2
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。649Please respect copyright.PENANA1k6vYQ5lcJ
649Please respect copyright.PENANAm0MQChbIbq
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。649Please respect copyright.PENANA64VJosCXMw
649Please respect copyright.PENANAHIORdfRqGE
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。649Please respect copyright.PENANAmcC6ojACe0
649Please respect copyright.PENANAr6ujAM1dP7
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。649Please respect copyright.PENANAytrPHamziP
649Please respect copyright.PENANA3pFodpZ7OH
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。649Please respect copyright.PENANAQKS9SmdIYZ
649Please respect copyright.PENANA0HXvhAY7Bg
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。649Please respect copyright.PENANAbAlnkFHA6I
649Please respect copyright.PENANAY0k8LH2c8Z
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」649Please respect copyright.PENANAwaE7alOBWn
649Please respect copyright.PENANA8BYd4X2QFn
「在你體內。」649Please respect copyright.PENANAeyKi7UXW1T
649Please respect copyright.PENANAKNCPYlzubf
「甚麼?」649Please respect copyright.PENANAPHOn256FVA
649Please respect copyright.PENANAqZK7UJfUUe
「蟻。」
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。649Please respect copyright.PENANAWc5Q61YMRE
649Please respect copyright.PENANAk1gAcX0fXX
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!649Please respect copyright.PENANAqlGFpJO00i
649Please respect copyright.PENANAJickiFrgov
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。649Please respect copyright.PENANAuxw6Gru9JI
649Please respect copyright.PENANAHMbOWjloAb
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。649Please respect copyright.PENANAJBeWNod9dL
649Please respect copyright.PENANAWrHDyviv1n
「誰?」另一聲音反問。649Please respect copyright.PENANAvaavlJvUzh
649Please respect copyright.PENANAQbeyeUy6N8
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」649Please respect copyright.PENANAfB4Aat3Xu2
649Please respect copyright.PENANAguJr46gaJE
靜。649Please respect copyright.PENANAtm7g9idD0V
649Please respect copyright.PENANAKxJe7VFDvD
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」649Please respect copyright.PENANAqEjO5Yllt1
649Please respect copyright.PENANAoIBNnkldC3
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」649Please respect copyright.PENANAm8Zd8VDwz4
649Please respect copyright.PENANAZW87kBDVVC
我:「我有精神病?」649Please respect copyright.PENANAeplmTwndLv
649Please respect copyright.PENANAvvMNFQ59XZ
醫:「是情緒病。」649Please respect copyright.PENANAWCGgh06uqD
649Please respect copyright.PENANAo9sUMnwJKX
我:「怎麼辦?」649Please respect copyright.PENANA11Tenh82iD
649Please respect copyright.PENANAWB9YL3vOJE
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」649Please respect copyright.PENANARkJYwI3kom
649Please respect copyright.PENANAZqsTqRoAOz
我:「謝謝醫生。」649Please respect copyright.PENANAZhN4GlSsCn
649Please respect copyright.PENANAdc1YtKn10K
醫:「不用謝。」649Please respect copyright.PENANA63EM7hDGl0
649Please respect copyright.PENANAbMMCNz7R5H
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。649Please respect copyright.PENANAbXc8kmzdWv
649Please respect copyright.PENANAxR7ZKfsjvj
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?649Please respect copyright.PENANA6v8G1mYOK9
649Please respect copyright.PENANAJsh9YVk1et
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;649Please respect copyright.PENANA48mRn5Hvjo
649Please respect copyright.PENANAuWTs8zzz5R
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;649Please respect copyright.PENANA52lQFKMTCI
649Please respect copyright.PENANAVPOTvHjCLe
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;649Please respect copyright.PENANAbVzTMTAdhF
649Please respect copyright.PENANAamqh3WJmEe
……649Please respect copyright.PENANAmv4BDVHhqb
649Please respect copyright.PENANALlelxZqQl9
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。649Please respect copyright.PENANAUwNETeMcJV
649Please respect copyright.PENANA9fUceyXu6V
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……