尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1lk01ZVrz
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡls6HCK4oDP
「妳瘋了嗎？」720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOcctvwd2U
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdTn1SLFDAd
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0LmOGfzhiP
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDSzmxwSo8N
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5nkNCBtN2
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzGyjvHUxG4
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mj79froRG
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cy9X1EUby
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyvtwFHlIYk
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNM0scp08x4
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGV7UMwju5I
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0XSSDWdDx
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgc2XXQgjy
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LaeXeqoX2
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrjSc0H8Bka
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡltoRd1uj3H
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡljQfaSpvi9
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkwtxGTSpmk
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo8L7a9dXwc
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBgIlF3qXji
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtx1C4NrdT
站在樹下的人是英傑。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjexmaxjlrO
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSM91ozCMMP
我跑向他，勾住他的手。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeNG4mbJ7yn
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvahGPdpPk
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIzqh6oDLI
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwdNfR1KEIa
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kSgr38ePa
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1aqRYSrWXG
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZe02suKjC1
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2FYBOxMJh
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqTDch6No22
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoOxkVelE0
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1GoQr0dKg
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDHCMxwcjq
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcFRwWuNbLC
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjd43bYxMwq
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7mO7ilvB5z
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡteVuGoDV8i
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgNp4l7ibED
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPOOfE7qRiC
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDRs2EcBJP
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKmc0M4VBw
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIWsDDVnGq5
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUHvbZTsJAk
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡneIyAE4vKF
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGOqiI5CKOm
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOc1covcT4
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ckJaiJVdW
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkSgitE7VM
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNyBl2DHh4
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNPr0ETdRX
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkk4BoiVrzl
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvZ7TozCw4
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5x3t2mtdte
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRZI5CzV6B
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cWrRt3JnL
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPiO2a99F4
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDRTXRfcIQ
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDmhkvPoQ7
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnmUHhCpVv
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZx6OU5fl6
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnIIy1NBek
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgz4bKT1Bb
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssdI6ixpZz
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVssZQFsGo
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLbISNF49j
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0i9bANdHHg
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfFqEhzH75c
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3RQlaBXUc
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMcfasRTVW
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzYhpQmHjBW
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1dcWzJomc
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSgKHnF5Wn
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp2doqwS2KD
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGymHm9jXFk
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBLxZYVGXnJ
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ZBF3A6iwC
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgHpzpOAQJ
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zhTcJyV7d
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLDEeQlSmE
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEV8271Hpm
在電視裡面。720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0MLeDCv2m
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtHZQ3Xupw
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvxQsaSflB
720Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ604JMh5R47
待續。
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