尋死的念頭一出現,我就被自己給嚇到了。520Please respect copyright.PENANAuNrcHLwpk4
520Please respect copyright.PENANAinA2GtYCaf
「妳瘋了嗎?」520Please respect copyright.PENANAYRFMFGRujL
520Please respect copyright.PENANAuyJtarSmd3
腦裡出現兩個我,理性的那個正在發飆,狠狠咒罵另一個我。520Please respect copyright.PENANAnCh7cnLQE1
520Please respect copyright.PENANAQdbERwf0Xn
而被罵的那個我,只是一個勁兒地哭。520Please respect copyright.PENANADedHsq5uNN
520Please respect copyright.PENANAH3heRxQmED
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事,便躲進被窩,用厚厚的被子蓋住全身,連頭都包在棉被裡,不讓任何光線進來。520Please respect copyright.PENANARKthDQ89of
520Please respect copyright.PENANALX8ABkI9G1
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡,我全身是汗,滿臉淚水。520Please respect copyright.PENANAmEk8ZOUwgj
520Please respect copyright.PENANAisCCvSeMbh
我側身把臉埋進枕頭,把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。520Please respect copyright.PENANAptIyOxRygD
520Please respect copyright.PENANAh3e5KzbdtL
520Please respect copyright.PENANAS4eTyr15Ox
我往自己的腳下看,有一片草原。520Please respect copyright.PENANAhCJFOCSXvF
520Please respect copyright.PENANANNXOawCyX6
面前有一條石頭道路,盡頭是顆大樹。520Please respect copyright.PENANAzpPHfhr5gf
520Please respect copyright.PENANAjsNJvMFldH
樹下站著一個人,太遠了,我看不清他的臉。520Please respect copyright.PENANAQVd7jz3cps
520Please respect copyright.PENANASELrtYKGpI
所以我走近,愈走愈近,直到我看清楚他是誰。520Please respect copyright.PENANA62zYRODvbx
520Please respect copyright.PENANAjeYHNeBrfR
站在樹下的人是英傑。520Please respect copyright.PENANAQ6J1yQwnLW
520Please respect copyright.PENANAfBgSqq65Ia
我跑向他,勾住他的手。520Please respect copyright.PENANAUfJx7lkuN9
520Please respect copyright.PENANAQnOZFrulUq
他對我笑著,什麼話也沒說。520Please respect copyright.PENANAd0fj5ILzsq
520Please respect copyright.PENANAVFkDmxE9Qy
我像是要把這些日子以來,所有發生的事情都告訴他,開始滔滔不絕地講。520Please respect copyright.PENANAunxXxFF5vt
520Please respect copyright.PENANA65zGFSXqXP
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方,就停下來。520Please respect copyright.PENANAhSC3UnLM2V
520Please respect copyright.PENANA4HY6SGCiAc
我還在講,他轉頭看我,伸出手揉了我的頭,就像他每次做的那樣。520Please respect copyright.PENANAZH5QIlEuyD
520Please respect copyright.PENANAzdOi0Uggv8
520Please respect copyright.PENANAds1UuzU7kv
我張開眼睛,才知道自己夢見英傑了。520Please respect copyright.PENANAHvZmvQWxRY
520Please respect copyright.PENANAXv6E5JfOAg
520Please respect copyright.PENANAmDhmhEp8cz
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。520Please respect copyright.PENANAYArl4ADVt8
520Please respect copyright.PENANAbQRJRBRNhk
是太想念英傑了,還是壓力太大需要出口?520Please respect copyright.PENANAr05Df0rUcO
520Please respect copyright.PENANAtvOWuIw0N0
或是…他真的怎麼了,才到我夢裡來?520Please respect copyright.PENANAYPdtq5ekKJ
520Please respect copyright.PENANAvZMZykvsJg
我心裡很害怕是後者,但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。520Please respect copyright.PENANA28t6npDRtP
520Please respect copyright.PENANAeV2UFdGIyv
這個夢緩解了我的情緒,也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。520Please respect copyright.PENANAmeBom3Ams2
520Please respect copyright.PENANAwBemCyZaJX
不管是什麼原因,都是英傑救了我。520Please respect copyright.PENANArr0g5Jqjb4
520Please respect copyright.PENANAwuFMLGVIke
520Please respect copyright.PENANARV92iJBCAI
我度過了心中的那個坎,日子雖然沒有改變,但我的心態改變了。520Please respect copyright.PENANAYVi11c2sRD
520Please respect copyright.PENANAqPrvDChS3V
「沒錯,都是我選的。所以,我要更努力才行。」520Please respect copyright.PENANAgae4iHYJez
520Please respect copyright.PENANAjgLDG5IPSc
雖然,從那個時候開始,過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮,但我很幸運,擁有很多好朋友,如果我開口,他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我;就算我死愛面子不開口,他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢,繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。520Please respect copyright.PENANASUv4OfiXoQ
520Please respect copyright.PENANAR7kMYMGHzi
高中的最後一個學期,我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學(當時已有就學貸款,但沒有考慮,只想著沒錢就去賺錢,別念書好了),但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學,硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡,要我慢慢還,要我和他們一起畢業。520Please respect copyright.PENANADE0HQEgUDV
520Please respect copyright.PENANA3wklNZBkWC
我沒參加考試,畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢,卻欠了好多人情債。520Please respect copyright.PENANA150JMejFZ1
520Please respect copyright.PENANAXreXNewTXe
520Please respect copyright.PENANA35oUJPw1lv
生活條件穩定之後,也談了戀愛,生活圈的人換了幾輪,越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。520Please respect copyright.PENANARvgiBFMx6y
520Please respect copyright.PENANAtUSU1SlLob
我還是沒有更換手機號碼,一直抱著小小的希望,520Please respect copyright.PENANA9svCABqh3v
520Please respect copyright.PENANAI5zsL4fh8D
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。520Please respect copyright.PENANAsr95hsAwzm
520Please respect copyright.PENANAkIEe9mZ79J
520Please respect copyright.PENANAdX9jAJ7kXs
某天,我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了,找也找不到。520Please respect copyright.PENANAJsnGaBQJru
520Please respect copyright.PENANAVKk7BA5yT5
我辦了卡片掛失,心裡希望有人撿到皮夾,會願意送還給我。520Please respect copyright.PENANARtPrEbY5vO
520Please respect copyright.PENANARt5LdhEpv9
這時,我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片,也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。520Please respect copyright.PENANAqteZD6DMV0
520Please respect copyright.PENANA4tX8wHvGuz
520Please respect copyright.PENANAcZAVW3KikI
我的皮夾沒回來,英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。520Please respect copyright.PENANANXjvl0D97f
520Please respect copyright.PENANAA3M7Tb2ze7
有時候,我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相,便努力回想那段日子,但畫面只是越來越模糊。520Please respect copyright.PENANArL2SyWuYBV
520Please respect copyright.PENANAePIajOaC8S
一年、兩年、三年,當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候,我卻看見他了。520Please respect copyright.PENANAwhOEGDBGed
520Please respect copyright.PENANA941Ba8N6mi
520Please respect copyright.PENANAhyz7qDaThg
在電視裡面。520Please respect copyright.PENANAaZMFVlpRBx
520Please respect copyright.PENANARZ0004NJki
520Please respect copyright.PENANAvEVFT9OlkO
520Please respect copyright.PENANAIgFd0q96W1
待續。
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