尋死的念頭一出現,我就被自己給嚇到了。372Please respect copyright.PENANAXCvTTBKi62
372Please respect copyright.PENANAd2h9EwqO4k
「妳瘋了嗎?」372Please respect copyright.PENANAgZW8V0bQqm
372Please respect copyright.PENANAkLCuAxI910
腦裡出現兩個我,理性的那個正在發飆,狠狠咒罵另一個我。372Please respect copyright.PENANAAFkcYV0F2c
372Please respect copyright.PENANAnhThRrtIt6
而被罵的那個我,只是一個勁兒地哭。372Please respect copyright.PENANAmthfgub0BL
372Please respect copyright.PENANAlYpMGeiDGk
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事,便躲進被窩,用厚厚的被子蓋住全身,連頭都包在棉被裡,不讓任何光線進來。372Please respect copyright.PENANAdIY2Fbkkv8
372Please respect copyright.PENANAW0fwG3ZjCf
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡,我全身是汗,滿臉淚水。372Please respect copyright.PENANA6ULpkhhBGS
372Please respect copyright.PENANAq8keOgfvAb
我側身把臉埋進枕頭,把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。372Please respect copyright.PENANAT0sj6ZMFMy
372Please respect copyright.PENANAzWCoTcM6VV
372Please respect copyright.PENANAwUAEY7lhbZ
我往自己的腳下看,有一片草原。372Please respect copyright.PENANAWRfuvlteS5
372Please respect copyright.PENANAZat7H6b9xN
面前有一條石頭道路,盡頭是顆大樹。372Please respect copyright.PENANAh2NLtBCkGs
372Please respect copyright.PENANA35fLMQIcXW
樹下站著一個人,太遠了,我看不清他的臉。372Please respect copyright.PENANAFBXprlzG6R
372Please respect copyright.PENANAsUZ4ydTkiN
所以我走近,愈走愈近,直到我看清楚他是誰。372Please respect copyright.PENANAi6DLw2Epzx
372Please respect copyright.PENANAquYM44YTzm
站在樹下的人是英傑。372Please respect copyright.PENANAyLW9t45CMk
372Please respect copyright.PENANAb46jWYZWUz
我跑向他,勾住他的手。372Please respect copyright.PENANADh32Jq713L
372Please respect copyright.PENANAOT4RMOUvPo
他對我笑著,什麼話也沒說。372Please respect copyright.PENANAkFJHVyr2d9
372Please respect copyright.PENANARr9mo3her0
我像是要把這些日子以來,所有發生的事情都告訴他,開始滔滔不絕地講。372Please respect copyright.PENANAYW9y7FdlYU
372Please respect copyright.PENANA4HtDo8yuKP
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方,就停下來。372Please respect copyright.PENANARzRpzvlv4y
372Please respect copyright.PENANA7dGLFNhg6H
我還在講,他轉頭看我,伸出手揉了我的頭,就像他每次做的那樣。372Please respect copyright.PENANAuHz0ZunHP9
372Please respect copyright.PENANAXYRpTae7MD
372Please respect copyright.PENANAaSMwpAAMON
我張開眼睛,才知道自己夢見英傑了。372Please respect copyright.PENANAr8LU6vVJCV
372Please respect copyright.PENANAsCb3rk1OMH
372Please respect copyright.PENANAmb7SpDjNfm
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。372Please respect copyright.PENANAovt9gS50Qg
372Please respect copyright.PENANAiJRGy2z2ko
是太想念英傑了,還是壓力太大需要出口?372Please respect copyright.PENANAaOjq5ZUnYr
372Please respect copyright.PENANA0Kx8xlc9jw
或是…他真的怎麼了,才到我夢裡來?372Please respect copyright.PENANA5K5AJ8b8QM
372Please respect copyright.PENANAjn8izITSLm
我心裡很害怕是後者,但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。372Please respect copyright.PENANAp1kKmjcRS5
372Please respect copyright.PENANALKsg6nxtFT
這個夢緩解了我的情緒,也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。372Please respect copyright.PENANAoxL2AVEU18
372Please respect copyright.PENANArlMENjIQ4F
不管是什麼原因,都是英傑救了我。372Please respect copyright.PENANAACvc8c69sP
372Please respect copyright.PENANAA38sSuhUjJ
372Please respect copyright.PENANAOtqAV32rY8
我度過了心中的那個坎,日子雖然沒有改變,但我的心態改變了。372Please respect copyright.PENANAdUgp3l0eo3
372Please respect copyright.PENANA4sb3EyIJZT
「沒錯,都是我選的。所以,我要更努力才行。」372Please respect copyright.PENANAm1VgokOQpE
372Please respect copyright.PENANAPnowuwH91G
雖然,從那個時候開始,過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮,但我很幸運,擁有很多好朋友,如果我開口,他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我;就算我死愛面子不開口,他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢,繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。372Please respect copyright.PENANA2bLx4ZP15m
372Please respect copyright.PENANAGuqeIU4tzd
高中的最後一個學期,我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學(當時已有就學貸款,但沒有考慮,只想著沒錢就去賺錢,別念書好了),但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學,硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡,要我慢慢還,要我和他們一起畢業。372Please respect copyright.PENANAsWrosku0v0
372Please respect copyright.PENANAWqTApz5VLn
我沒參加考試,畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢,卻欠了好多人情債。372Please respect copyright.PENANA341adEXCfE
372Please respect copyright.PENANA1cOwqgFI7w
372Please respect copyright.PENANARtrO0BvM78
生活條件穩定之後,也談了戀愛,生活圈的人換了幾輪,越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。372Please respect copyright.PENANAVUXfn1sfKy
372Please respect copyright.PENANAh0UGp8pFcL
我還是沒有更換手機號碼,一直抱著小小的希望,372Please respect copyright.PENANAfBfv42tDfI
372Please respect copyright.PENANAlcPQTFOrSh
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。372Please respect copyright.PENANAh6sv4wAcQs
372Please respect copyright.PENANAh2XPX7oGDC
372Please respect copyright.PENANAs2HxnhhUEV
某天,我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了,找也找不到。372Please respect copyright.PENANAZgsqUPRwkT
372Please respect copyright.PENANAEwN21tHG4p
我辦了卡片掛失,心裡希望有人撿到皮夾,會願意送還給我。372Please respect copyright.PENANA3yXuDrUjEz
372Please respect copyright.PENANAWd5H5SYCR3
這時,我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片,也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。372Please respect copyright.PENANApolj2CLSxx
372Please respect copyright.PENANAZbgdETIRXf
372Please respect copyright.PENANAi1SlutfXC5
我的皮夾沒回來,英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。372Please respect copyright.PENANAMds2LcNrsk
372Please respect copyright.PENANAyZrQMktY84
有時候,我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相,便努力回想那段日子,但畫面只是越來越模糊。372Please respect copyright.PENANAKqLWheRIMz
372Please respect copyright.PENANAgSvfV7CBqD
一年、兩年、三年,當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候,我卻看見他了。372Please respect copyright.PENANAvLDV5nwJtG
372Please respect copyright.PENANAG435qecpwO
372Please respect copyright.PENANAwwEVxrVU5b
在電視裡面。372Please respect copyright.PENANAmelXOrzZts
372Please respect copyright.PENANAivAmdLPTbt
372Please respect copyright.PENANAgu5ClfXymu
372Please respect copyright.PENANAP6SrOWzI0M
待續。
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