LOC: Lady Evelyn Smoothwater-Provincial Park, Red Squirrel Lake Campground
The Next Evening
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Lights up. Kylie Juniper is the only one onstage. She speaks directly to the audience.
Kylie: So yeah, thanks to that Quebecer, I went to bed terrified last night. This morning, as we drove to Lake Anima Nipissing, we passed Latchford, the town we’re supposed to get off in at the end of the week. I tried to convince Mom and Dad to start there instead of Lake Anima Nipissing so we wouldn’t have to deal with the Ghost of Ontario on the first day of the trip. You see, Red Squirrel Lake, here, was our first destination.
I’ll tell ya, it’s been a terrible day. I’ve been getting eaten up by enormous mosquitoes, and I’ve had to deal with two Portages. Portages are defined as long hikes through the forests that canoeists take whenever there’s a dead end, or if they just want to take a shortcut to the next lake. What’s even worse is that we not only had to carry our canoe to the other side but also all our luggage. I swear, I’m gonna die out here. Go on, Ghost of Ontario, feed on me! I’m the only kid on this useless canoeing trip, so what’s my point of even being alive? However, tonight, my luck changed. I met somebody. A boy. A mysterious boy named Ihaan. Let me show you what happened.
Lights down. Shuffling is heard. Lights up. Kylie has a headlamp on and is surveying the far side of her campground in search of the latrine. She’s scared. Suddenly, a mysterious sound comes from out of nowhere.
Mysterious Sound: Hee, hee, hee.
Kylie stops. She checks her surroundings. Then she continues walking.
Mysterious Sound: Hee, hee, hee.
Kylie jumps. She frightfully peers behind her. Nothing’s there. She continues.
Mysterious Sound: Hee, hee, hee. Yikes!
Suddenly, a dark figure falls onto the stage directly in front of Kylie Juniper.
Kylie and Mysterious Figure: Ahhhh!
Kylie chuckles. The mysterious figure jumps to his/her feet. It’s a teenage boy about her age!
Kylie: (Smiles.) Hey, you scared me. I thought you were a bear. But you’re not.
Mysterious Boy: It’s pretty obvious if you look at it! Do I look like a bear to you?
Kylie: (Shakes her head.) No.
Mysterious Boy: That’s what I thought. (He grabs Kylie’s arm and starts to pull her away.) Little red, we need to go before the other people on this island see us!
Kylie: (Breaks free.) I don’t even know your name!
Mysterious Boy: Oh, I do apologize. (Clears throat.) My name is Ihaan.
Kylie: Ihaan? Um, my name is Kylie. Kylie Juniper.
Ihaan: Kylie, eh? What are you doing here on Red Squirrel Lake?
Kylie: No. (She glares.) Why are you here? Listen, pal, we saw this campsite first. If you want a campsite, then go to Lake Temagami, but we’ve claimed this one.
Ihaan: Oh, little red, you have it all wrong. I live here.
Kylie: (Stares.) Live here? Here at Red Squirrel Lake?
Ihaan: No, I live here. (Extends his arms.) Here in the Lady Evelyn-Smoothwater Provincial Park. (Drops arms.)
Kylie: So, you’re a hermit?43Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ZXXljk4h8
Ihaan: Well, if that’s how you civilized people define a person who lives secluded from society, then yes. (He starts to leave. Kylie stops him.)
Kylie: Excuse me, Ihaan, but aren’t you a little too young to be living on your own?
Ihaan: (Turns to her.) I may be, but I’ve been living here for a long time now. I’ve grown used to it.
Kylie: Ihaan, where are your parents?
Ihaan: I don’t have any parents, Kylie. I’m a hermit.
Kylie: (Confused.) What? Exactly how long has it been since you last saw another human being?
Ihaan: Ooh, a long time. The last human I saw goes back to a time I can’t really remember all that well anymore.
Kylie: Whoa. Do you remember what this last human looked like?
Ihaan: (Waves his hand.) Nah, it’s all a blur. But I must admit, I really like this park. Dempsey tells me that I should enjoy it.
Kylie: But you’ve been alone all these years. Wait, who’s Dempsey?
Ihaan: Oh, I haven’t been alone. I have all the animals. (Counts on his fingers.) The moose, loons, eagles, beavers, squirrels, mosquitoes, roaches, spiders, and let’s not forget the snakes.
Kylie: What? They’re snakes here?
Ihaan: Well, yeah. It is the wilderness after all. But they’re nice snakes. They just like attention, and not every mosquito bites. It’s just—
Kylie: The females. Terrific. But how have you made friends with every animal here?
Ihaan: (Chuckles.) Well, little red, when you’ve been in the wilderness for as long as me, you tend to pick up a few things. Things like catching fish with your bare hands, lighting a torch, making disguises that will protect you from these crazy low temperatures, and befriending all different kinds of animals. I’ve been working together with the moose and bears to help me survive.
Kylie: (Gulps.) And you haven’t been caught by the Ghost of Ontario?
Ihaan: Huh? Ghost of Ontario? What the heck is that?
Kylie: Wait, you’ve seriously never heard of it before? What kind of hermit are you?
Ihaan: (Smiles.) One of a kind, little red. Ya see, I don’t really dig ghost stories, so that’s probably the reason why this so-called Ghost of Ontario is unfamiliar to me.
Suddenly, from offstage, we hear Penelope’s voice.
Penelope: Kylie? Kylie, where are you?
Kylie groans. Ihaan gasps in horror.
Ihaan: Great, I gave ourselves away! Little red, (He again grabs Kylie’s arm and starts to drag her.) We need to hide! That other human may see us if we’re not careful!
Kylie: (Breaks free. Again.) No, Ihaan, you don’t understand! I’m not a hermit like you! I’m here on a weeklong canoe trip with my parents! That’s my mother!
Ihaan: Your mother? Aw, bummer. I really thought you were one.
Kylie: (Backs up.) I have to go now, Ihaan. (Gasps.) Wait a minute, I have an idea! Why don’t you come with me and meet my parents? I’m sure they’d love to meet you.
Ihaan: (Shakes his head. He’s a little shy.) I’d love to, Kylie, but I can’t. I just can’t.
Penelope: (Offstage.) Kylie! Kylie!
Kylie: Give me a minute, Mom! Please! (Focuses on Ihaan.) Please, Ihaan. I need another kid my age to hang out with!
Ihaan: I’m sorry, Kylie.
He walks away, and, unusually, Kylie notices that he has a limp in his walk! Yes, a limp!
Kylie: Ihaan, what’s wrong with your ankle? You’re limping!
Ihaan doesn’t answer. He stops and turns to her one last time.
Ihaan: Thank you, Kylie, and I’m sorry. I have a feeling we’ll meet again, though. Until then, bye.
He waves and limps offstage. Kylie stares. Then, she, too, steps offstage. Ihaan returns. He speaks a monologue.
Ihaan: Hm, this Kylie is an interesting character. I wonder if what she said about wanting another kid her age to hang out with is true. If it is, should I join her? (Shakes head.) No. What if her parents don’t like me? What if they want to chuck me into the lake and feed me to this so-called Ghost of Ontario? What would Ro, my eagle friend, and Dempsey, my moose friend, think of me? (Shakes head again.) No, I can’t do it. (Looks at his shaking hands.) Why are my hands shaking? Why? Oh, I hate this! What if I don’t belong here in the Lady Evelyn-Smoothwater Provincial Park? What if winding up here was no coincidence? What if I wound up here by accident? What if I have a family across the lake that’s searching for me? You know what? I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna join Kylie and her parents on this weeklong canoe trip! Maybe they’ll help me find my lost memories? There’s only one way to find out!
Lights down.
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End of Scene Three
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