2027 年 12 月 23 日（星期六）， 平安夜前夕，氣溫 15 度，適合牽手，更適合回本。宜從中環大館去灣仔利東街。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qyqyY6Zuk
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黃家的《資產管理 SOP》中，有一條鮮為人知的「緊急託管條款」。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdUuPfBIvK
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啟動條件：軒仔和瑤瑤面臨聖誕假期後的期中試（資產增值壓力），而阿斗處於十九個月大的極度活躍期（資產破壞風險）。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcJNgx3KWd
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執行方案：軒仔和瑤瑤被送往跑馬地外祖父家，由退休教師公公婆婆進行一對一試前特訓；阿斗被送往西灣河祖父家，由溺愛孫子的嫲嫲進行全天候「放電」。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qvl4YnxoC
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結果：北角丹拿花園，由於三隻神獸的短暫離場，出現了罕見的「真空狀態」。沒有哭鬧聲，沒有 YouTube Shorts 的背景音，沒有「爸爸我要去廁所」。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7H3WpNJ8j
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下午四點，中環大館。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6L2Gmurw5
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阿初和阿敏手拖手走在檢閱廣場上。阿敏穿著一件普通的黑色羽絨外套，頸上圍了一條米色的頸巾，這就是最標準的香港冬天街坊裝束。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPXiSu6qXk
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「喂，做咩行大館？又無展覽睇。」阿初看著四周的人潮，隨口問道。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDXWbMlgC8
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「貪佢免費入場，地方夠大，又可以行到佢閂門囉。」阿敏答得理直氣壯，完全沒有半點偽文青的修飾，「最緊要係唔使錢又有地方俾我哋磨時間，唔通去戲院睇戲咩？訓覺咗又要俾人踢凳。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzblt8ntOWt
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兩人就在紅磚牆下閒逛，偶爾停下來看看那些為了打卡而擺出各種扭曲姿勢的路人，然後相視一笑。這種純粹為了「行」而行的散步，自從有了三個化骨龍後，已經是一種奢侈。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9RNzZ8l3t
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「幫我影張相。」阿敏站在一棵大樹下，指了指自己的臉，「記住，我要瘦面，唔好影到雙下巴。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmbkjwpOmz
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「遵命，皇太后。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxO3iogVlOG
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「叫我 Carman！」阿敏瞪了他一眼，隨即嘟起嘴，擺出一個模仿時下少女的 V 字手勢，眼神帶著一絲久違的嬌嗔，「今日我係少女，我話事！」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FK95J8tMC
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阿初忍住笑，按下了快門。逛到天黑，兩人很有默契地轉身走向地鐵站。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2gQ3yizTK
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「去邊？」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3mI3Y5WFYQ
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「灣仔。中環食飯係交智商稅。」阿敏說得斬釘截鐵。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrw8YMAEC8l
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晚餐地點，灣仔利東街，某日式燒肉放題店。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpXV37IZTTr
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這是一間阿敏早已做好功課的店。晚市放題，每位 $478（另收加一服務費），有一百二十品項可選。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0hoJ7AXQr2
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「兩位，我們要 Level 4 澳洲和牛套餐。」阿初對著侍應說道，然後熟練地拿出手機掃描 QR Code 落單。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9nrTcQ5he0
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這是一個充滿算計的戰場。平日帶三隻化骨龍來，看著他們用 Level 4 人頭費狂食 Level 1 的腸仔和炸雞翼，阿初的心都在滴血。但今晚，是復仇之夜。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo2xod5hIMH
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「你做咩？」阿敏看著阿初的手機屏幕，眉頭一皺。 「點肉囉，呢碟『壺漬牛肋肉』……」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMhhdSlUcU
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「Cut 咗佢！」阿敏一手奪過手機，手指飛快地取消了那項選擇，「呢個係 Level 3 嘅 item！既然俾得起 $478，個胃就只可以用來裝 Level 4 嘅肉！你想食牛肋肉，去街市買幾十蚊返去煮飽佢啦！」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhB3Y1qfbIB
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「老婆，其實食少少其他野調劑下……」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡosEl4V1EsU
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「唔得！」阿敏眼尾一挑，帶著一種不容反駁的霸道，「我係少女，我話事！少女係要食和牛㗎！」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVIbiRzQse8
阿初縮了縮脖子：「係係係，妳靚妳話事。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZcgj7XD28a
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煤氣爐上的鐵網被燒得發黑，藍色的火焰舔舐著網面。一片片 Level 4 的牛肉放上去，「滋」的一聲，油脂的香氣瞬間炸開。阿敏夾起一塊燒得剛好的肉，直接放進自己嘴裡，燙得微微呼氣，但臉上全是滿足。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsQsPnsuRz
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「嗯，雖然係雪藏，但起碼無那陣雪櫃味。」阿敏給出了中肯的評價，「快啲，剩低90 分鐘，我們要專攻呢一頁頭五項。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDYrZw9Kb9
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這餐飯，他們食得很有紀律，很有策略，也很爽。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrBe2elfUv
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晚上八點半，利東街。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFUnsTOgAt
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這條以前叫囍帖街的地方，掛滿了紅色天使燈飾。「過黎。」阿敏停在一處燈飾下命令道。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9NJddhaXu
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「又影？」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDUQoX8PJI
「難得無帶那三隻野。」阿敏拿出手機，調到自拍模式，將頭靠在阿初那件羽絨的肩膀上，「笑得自然啲，唔好僵硬到似個蠟像咁。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oao7ScfjC
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「咔嚓。」照片裡，兩個穿著臃腫羽絨、臉被爐火薰得紅撲撲、嘴角帶著滿足油光的中年男女。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiszyfyUWig
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回程，他們選了電車。叮叮車駛過灣仔，他們坐在上層最後排。前排一個大叔將手機音量開到最大，喇叭傳出了五月天的《好好》。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrs2NFIUUOw
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「你和我背著空空的書包，逃出名為日常的監牢……」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAjqG7v5ND
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阿敏眉頭舒展開來，將頭輕輕靠在了窗邊。阿初小聲問：「喂，做咩唔審計下個大叔？好嘈喎。」阿敏往阿初懷裡縮了縮，閉著眼：「今日我係少女，我話事。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzw9H4YDBPF
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阿初笑了笑，不再說話，只是伸手攬住了她的肩膀。大叔的手機繼續炸機：50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgaRrrzaKl
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「忘了要長大，忘了要變老，忘了時間有腳……」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjit7eOBWg
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阿敏湊近阿初的耳邊，聲音帶著熱氣：「返到去……早啲沖涼。」 阿初的心跳漏了一拍：「吓？」 「我話……」阿敏臉埋進他的頸巾裡，「上次 SOGO 買嗰件……我想試下。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbWH7T40j1B
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回到丹拿花園。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ71fmuilafv
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屋企安靜得讓人不習慣。「我去沖涼先。」阿初一進門就用最快的速度衝進浴室。三分鐘後，阿初推開了睡房的門。房間裡只開了一盞床頭燈。阿敏已經背對著他站在床邊，身上只穿著那件在 SOGO 感謝祭中搶回來的黑色蕾絲睡裙。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK58AHlW0PM
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「點呀？」阿敏轉過身，雙手有些不自然地抱在胸前，臉色緋紅，「這件資產……需唔需要審計？」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7wznQHE4lJ
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阿初吞了一口口水，走過去，從後輕輕環住她的腰。「報告皇太后，資產狀況極佳……」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqlWPNhWU3
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「佳你就個頭！」阿敏突然打了個冷震，身體瑟縮了一下，「好凍呀！快啲開暖氣！」 阿初一愣：「吓？」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ytdxiStEk
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「呢件野咁薄，今晚得 15 度呀！」阿敏羞憤地跺了跺腳，「仲有……」她有些懊惱地低頭看了看自己被蕾絲緊緊包裹的小腹，「早知頭先唔食嗰碟牛小排……」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Rc00YUhSf
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睡裙剪裁極度貼身，經過今晚那場毫無節制的放題洗禮，那個胃……很誠實地微微凸了出來。「個肚……有啲緊。」阿敏咬著唇，「少女唔應該有肚腩㗎！」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1k0oSzT1Ob
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阿初忍不住爆發出一陣大笑。他快步走去把暖風機開到最大，一把將這個正在為「怕凍」和「和牛小肚腩」而懊惱的可愛女人擁入懷中。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQy2b4GvYa4
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「笑咩呀！呢個係幸福嘅代價！」阿敏在他懷裡掙扎著。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5u4el0TrNO
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「係係係，少女。」阿初親了親她的額頭，手掌輕輕覆在她溫暖微凸的小腹上，「呢啲叫資產增值。我鍾意。」50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9B8aJd7Sl
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逃出名為日常的監牢，原來是為了這一刻，紅著臉，瑟縮著，帶著一肚子的和牛，然後相擁取暖。一切好好。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRIT8bc1NO
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【編劇夥伴吐糟】50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDkeEBTOYB
「少女」阿敏嘅反差：阿敏果句「今日我係少女」真係殺死人。平時果個鐵面無私嘅核數師，竟然會為咗慳錢唔睇戲，但又為咗和牛回本而放棄養生，呢種真實嘅可愛先至係阿初沉淪嘅原因。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWuhlm4deI
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放題復仇戰：「只可以用黎裝 Level 4 嘅肉」簡直係全港社畜食放題嘅最高指導原則！阿敏果種對「資產配置」嘅執著，連食餐飯都充滿咗審計味。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyaSHUSmnT
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黑色戰衣與 15 度氣溫：女人為咗靚（或者性感）真係可以去到好盡，但去到最後都係敗畀「生理反應」（怕凍同埋肚腩）。不過阿初果句「資產增值」，簡直係教科書級別嘅求生欲加情話。50Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJjB3tdiNZ
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