觸不到的戀人 - 12

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二零一一年，十一月。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTXNy8xJZVK
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天空一直處於陰暗狀態，大概是已經進入冬天的緣故，所以太陽出現的次數也少得可憐。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXXDr2QquHx
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寒冷的冬天。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhdq0UJSFo
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班上的每個人都穿的很厚重，甚至圍上了圍巾，看來這次寒流來襲真讓每個人都冷的受不了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IAILT2KTh
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我也不例外。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZjZQNJ4Mz
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轉眼間已經進入高二，這一年我是怎麼過去的？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopHjhVGgMP
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原以為會和班上的女生處的不好，但卻意外的合得來，尤其是和那個滿臉雀斑的女生。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWel8Vn8PRB
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本來陰沉的個性在和她們相處後變得比較開放了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjN0kqhO5bF
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這算好事嗎？我不清楚。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2HMLbuI1aU
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只覺得能維持好現狀就好了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlgf25MeSM2
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「橋橋，妳不進來嗎？外面很冷的說。」身後的窗戶被打開，一個女生探頭出來對我說。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPk4F7W6gJZ
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我搖頭，然後對她笑了笑，並把窗戶關上。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXQY4Yzo0ic
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下課後只要我是醒著，就會站在教室後門外，就算很冷，也想站在這裡。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVu8l8vB3mc
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沒有原因的。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaATWxqFILO
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以前做事總是需要原因、理由，但時間久了，才發現這些都是多餘的。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VwjWMzOE9
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太多事情不需要理由。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXitoqUWFb
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包括感情。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5jDEsjAKt
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吹風吹得夠久了，上課鐘也差不多該響了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyoMnQWhLQ4
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在我準備打開教室後門時，耳邊的音樂停止了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQGK3ptjcW
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我伸手觸摸戴在耳上的耳機，然後疑惑。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsrb1rn5kI
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手機在震動。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZQWg5GNOZ
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我連看都不看直接把手伸進口袋裡，按下接聽。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi8ihtJdaRT
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耳機沒有傳來任何聲音，我喂了好幾聲，對方依舊沉默。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fsPi0G6jE
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會不會對方早就把電話掛掉了？但掛掉的話音樂會繼續撥放才是。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡShslMjQ7pR
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沉默、熟悉的沉默，這種感覺……244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn53KL5Zbls
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我緩緩的把手機從口袋裡拿出來，看了來電者，終於明白這沉默的電話為何不會讓我想掛電話。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpYAGm0id4
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早已習慣的沉默。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGXO4UMOTJx
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他為什麼會打來？為什麼是挑今天、這種時候？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Llw6MPN4Z
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「楊瑀峰，你在不講話我要掛電話了。」上課鐘在我講完這句話後隨即敲響。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW44z1BB13T
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雖然這節是自習，但我並不想在教室裡講電話，而且是和前男友。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5LluI9j98
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不曾承認過的前男友。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVcJQxPndEa
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「……妳最近過得好嗎？」耳機終於有了些聲音、他的聲音。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFde3Ri559g
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一年了，久久未聽到過的聲音。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1l1iZ0P6HH
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依舊冷漠，卻好像多了幾份感情。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc53cZR3crq
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是我的錯覺吧？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA25byPh8LV
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「我很好。」244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6fXhFR9q5
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我以為我會說「在和你分手後的每一天我都過得非常好」，都我沒有，反而平靜的回答說我很好。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOQl6iWNApf
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不想用那種諷刺的語氣，一年了，我那無理取鬧的個性不該再存在。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRNLSugtMyA
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他沒再講下去，我們又陷入了沉默。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmvTXoMQlO
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他還是一樣不多話、一樣冷漠，完全沒有改變。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6czSUOATGY
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走廊上的人群越來越少，我應該要進教室的，卻因為這通電話不得不止步於此。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkZuyQOyOA9
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「我還在等妳。」他說。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ppFNgRe87
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「當初那麼乾脆的把我甩開，現在又說你在等我？你在跟我開玩笑嗎？」我掩蓋不住語氣中的怒火，我感覺到氣氛開始變差，我和他。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡURXs5gLntq
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「我們之間能不能不要只有爭吵？」244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEgSIzxnnE
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這話讓我愣了一下。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG8qIoJDWKd
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我們？現在會用「我們」這個詞了？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgm98Oksqn
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我強忍住那想哭的情緒，深呼吸、吐氣。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Ovr5Hw4zC
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「我不知道你今天打給我到底要幹麻，如果只是問我近況，那我可以大聲的告訴你我過得很好，你不用擔心，我們分手已經一年多了，你還想知道我的狀況幹麻？如果你是在我們還在一起的時候說剛剛句話，我們可能就不會變成這樣，是你不說、是你不肯表達自己，我知道我自己也有問題，那你就沒有嗎？你說你在等我，那又怎樣？你不改變你這樣的個性，我們還是會有爭執你懂嗎？好了，我要去上課了。」語畢，我打開教室後門走進去，電話沒有按下掛斷鍵。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cWwt9GJip
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我以為他會結束通話。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXTmvTKGvx
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「葉星橋。」耳機傳來他喊我名字的聲音。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgvGmpxoyk
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我回到座位，然後坐下。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBysgQyjKj
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「我改，妳等我，好好照顧自己。」244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNWALaNIX9T
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在他講完沒多久，耳機傳入耳中的聲音不再是沉默，而是音樂。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV0Tu7Zxk9N
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通話結束了，他掛斷了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1MzYVJXqd
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改變？為我……改變嗎？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCbSPScHSc
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我趴在桌上，臉埋進雙臂裡，睡覺。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeoMkt2fBD
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只有睡覺、我才不會胡思亂想、不會期待。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC525Tka30D
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我沒想到這是我最後一次聽到瑀的聲音。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZIimvmwxyv
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二零一三年，七月。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxAj6PFfbV
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車窗外的景色一直在改變，音樂也是。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5CtfOyc91T
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車上除了音樂聲外還有小迪唱歌的聲音，我和阿龍一直都保持安靜。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkSxIrAjLM
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其實小迪心裡也很不平靜吧？所以才唱歌。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfahJIK4pX
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我和阿龍呢？我們也只是表面看起來沒事、心裡亂的很。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhVjkjLoTJ
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看著車窗外，我試著回想你的聲音、你的模樣，卻已模糊。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYvlHXZmkv
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想不起來。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqfSTqsIr8
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車開上了山，這山路一直在繞圈圈，繞的我頭好暈好想吐。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdw9gLd5bN
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等到不再繞圈時，已經到達目的地了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbeqU10S9YJ
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山頂。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrE3fIPA5GS
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阿龍把車停好，並解開安全帶，回頭示意我可以下車了。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRqYHqoZo4
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小迪比我快一步開車門，我跟在他後面下車。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWePQ9UDh7
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「終於下車了，頭好暈啊！」小迪挺直身體，伸了個懶腰。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡizo8YNUzCP
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阿龍對小迪嘆了口大氣，然後打開後車廂，拿了一袋水果出來，小迪馬上搶過手，比我們兩個先走一步。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFIgg1tH9J
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「那傢伙是在急什麼啊？」阿龍搔搔頭，看著小迪離去的背影。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkNveQ3eNcs
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我聳肩，然後望著眼前那巨大狀況的建築物，你──就在裡面。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohymBT9Sqg
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「為什麼突然想面對了？」阿龍轉過頭問我。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSwLxYL5SU
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沉默。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSn1cxowbnc
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「當初那麼固執不肯接受，怎麼現在完全不一樣了？」244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj0iENNeCd0
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「那一年發生太多事情了，也看開了。」我邊說邊踏出腳步，朝那棟建築物走去。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTmNoWkItBj
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總得親自經歷過某些事才會長大，對吧？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnU4tVH77yo
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進入大門後，那些我不懂的麻煩事就由阿龍和小迪去處理，我則是站在電梯門口等著。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kpqBFd4ux
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這裡裝潢的很簡單、但是那種不會看膩的簡單。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFYmQhVhSG
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而且，很安靜。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkzrAeXomp
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你喜歡這裡嗎？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6c1YlMBIax
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「橋橋，上樓囉！」眼前出現了一張卡片左右移動著，小迪正拿著電梯感應卡一副準備好的樣子站在我旁邊，而阿龍在他身後。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1deMLvTtC
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按了電梯，等電梯開門，我們三個一起走進去，小迪按了五樓，然後用感應卡啟動它。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ032qiRwZD7
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電梯一層樓一層樓的上去，我突然覺得喘、覺得不自在。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyINYexIpC9
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五樓到了，很快。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGw7TC4FWM
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電梯門一開，先看見的是一座佛像，然後周圍的走廊有幾個人在走動，走廊直到盡頭的左右都有條路可以進去。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRcKHdAKeG
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很多個房間。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRRCooN19x
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我停在佛像前面，凝望。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQFbKAG9DDS
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「怎麼了？」小迪拍了我一下，一臉擔心的問。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSicUNfwUKZ
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「我在想，他真的想見到我嗎？」我雖然是問小迪，但視線一直沒有離開佛像過。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXgcJ4gsF0
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這個問題雖然在來之前，他們已經跟我確定過了，但我還是想問。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW0M81SGE0R
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問佛、問你。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3tU68QXqa
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExYmmqdVAa
你想見到我嗎？那麼殘忍的傷害你的我？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7B08M7mGsU
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBF9CfUtVU
「只有妳，才是阿楊最想見到的人。」阿龍回答。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpjdtdB0U9P
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ggCuzJuLu
我知道。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG55ujnuxDd
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFuVb8NkVcx
我在心裡告訴自己，我知道他一直想見到我，只是我的懦弱讓我一直選擇逃避。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtAyuzLbsy3
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5cLdBRvFS
小迪勾住我的手，朝著他所在的地方前進。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd8pBh6qmvV
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArnrnSPZjt
不知道經過了多少房間，小迪才帶著我轉彎，走進一個房間裡。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmQPAg5bH10
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWht6nc8Qms
這房間其實很大，很多櫃子，裡面，有很多人的──244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8WuI6qKBr
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwgCXGXj26s
骨灰。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCoGRkLGnI
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6goiXybUI6
走到靠近窗邊的位子，小迪放開我的手，然後淺笑。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡipelqzsaEH
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMXhTIBpn71
悲傷的微笑。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFWxE44R0I
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLnXWLE0nwS
「這位子是我們、阿傑、殷一起出錢買下來的，很適合阿楊，我覺得很適合。」阿龍像是在對我說、又像是在自言自語。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Q7ZHyRqaX
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQLPfIKhUe
「阿楊，我們來看你囉！這次我們終於把橋橋帶來了。」小迪邊說邊打開那扇門。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7b9HaKOxIH
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp11Dtd6cup
有你在的那扇門。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTZVh0q0hSV
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1inpF6vqaY
有時候我常常在想，人死後被擺進這麼小的一個空間裡，不會寂寞嗎？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTWA9ib6RY
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSQkp1QuWH
一直以來都很孤僻的你，會寂寞嗎？244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEKcxCFmYjH
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZK4NlfkiJ2
小迪和你說了好多好多的話，說到眼眶濕了聲音哽咽了也還是繼續說下去，而阿龍則是靜靜著聽小迪和你說話。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyv5wcjJBf5
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwi7EEofuCc
小迪說了什麼？我聽不清楚，我一直處於失神狀態，直到阿龍叫了我。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNEoztgXhH
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnApDTZE9kC
「我們先去電梯口那邊，等等在過來，妳和阿楊好好說說話吧？」阿龍拉著好像快哭的小迪，離開了這裡。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJHbohEDid
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBsuv3mrbk
我愣在原地許久，才走上前，然後面向你、看著你。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwh9kRIKJR
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJxTiRa6EKo
照片中的你和記憶中模糊的你終於重疊，我想起你的模樣，那冷漠不帶任何表情的帥氣臉龐。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡae8imvPp1u
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSG4kNwdliR
笑起來令我深深著迷的臉。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVGHPBRccr
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1edUWdXua
不知道花了多久的時間，我才讓聲音從嘴巴裡發出來，對你、對這沒有任何人的房間。244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIIOcsIK8wz
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYRqpjjkBQ
「好久不見。」244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0F9LKEXNRn
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAREBQ25DID
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQYIDJTZFxE
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnNXPPIf8AH
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRMtgOIFQq
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWO1MuBHw4
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDV6WMJhlvm
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡikRxBYdlg8
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqDfui1K8Th
244Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJQvnWlj1z
我們已處於不同世界，而你存在的地方，是我無法觸及到的。ns18.119.248.54da2

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