FOREWORD - CHAPTER 11 — “Backliner”

University has that background noise that never stops.

Laughter, footsteps, voices crossing paths.

I’m sitting on the low wall, Maddie next to me, playing with the zipper of her backpack like it’s a drum.

Steve and Carol are glued together as always, and Chloe is there, perfect like a cover photo, wearing sunglasses even though we’re in the shade.

“I swear, Vale, if you don’t answer me in three seconds, I’m dumping your backpack,” Maddie says, laughing.

“I didn’t even hear you, sorry,” I reply.

“Classic. You get lost in your thoughts and leave us here talking to your ghost.”

“My ghost is nicer than me, so you’re lucky.”

Steve laughs. Carol follows. Chloe rolls her eyes.

Then Luke arrives.

I recognize him immediately: Steve’s friend, the kind one, the one who always says hi even if he doesn’t really know what to say.

He walks over with a smile, gives Steve a pat on the shoulder.

“Hey, you coming tonight?”

“Of course I’m coming. How could I miss it?”

Luke nods.

Then he turns.

He looks at me.

It’s not a pushy look. It doesn’t make me uncomfortable.

“So… see you tonight,” he says with a half-smile.

And walks away.

Silence.

Then Maddie explodes.

“Okay, Vale, he looked at you like you were the only person in this courtyard.”

“Oh, stop it,” I reply, trying not to blush.

“Come on, you know he’s got a crush on you,” Steve adds.

“What are you talking about? I don’t want any guy. I want to focus on myself. No distractions.”

Carol pretends to applaud.

“Bravo, Vale. Feminist manifesto 2025.”

“No, it’s just that… I don’t feel like it. That’s all.”

“Alright, alright,” Maddie says, raising her hands. “I won’t insist. For now.”

Then she turns to Steve.

“So what’s happening tonight? Why are you guys making plans?”

“There’s a motorcycle meet-up. Underground races, adrenaline, crazy people. I love that stuff.”

Carol looks at us.

“You girls coming too?”

Chloe stretches her shirt, checks her nails.

“I’ll pass. Not really my kind of event. Too much noise, too much dust, too many leather jackets and not enough personality.”

“Wow, thanks for the review,” Steve says, laughing.

Maddie looks at me.

She doesn’t say anything.

But her gaze is a whole speech.

“If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking, the answer is no,” I say.

“Come onnn,” she insists. “We never do anything different. Always the same stuff. Studying, coffee, Netflix. We’re young, Vale.”

“I don’t like these things.”

“You just have to watch. We go, and if we don’t like it, we leave.”

Steve nods.

“Exactly. And maybe you’ll have fun. Or at least grab a sandwich.”

Carol pushes him.

“Stop it, the sandwich won’t convince her.”

Chloe stands up, adjusts her bag.

“Okay, while you decide whether to live or die of boredom, I’m out. See you tomorrow. Maybe.”

“We’re heading to class too,” Steve says.

Carol follows.

“We’ll see you tonight.”

Maddie turns to me.

“Count on it,” she says, with that smile full of complicity.

I look at her.

I sigh.

“I’ll think about it,” I reply, laughing.

Night falls.

In the end… she convinced me.

I don’t know how, I don’t know when, but Maddie won.

Jeans, t-shirt, sneakers. No makeup, no frills.

We arrive.

The place is isolated.

An abandoned industrial zone, scattered lights, people everywhere.

Music vibrating underfoot, the smell of gasoline and adrenaline.

And a booth.

A girl with red hair and sunglasses takes bets like she’s selling popcorn.

Totally normal.

Like it’s legal.

Like it’s right.

“Vale!” Carol shouts as soon as she sees us.

“You actually came!”

“Unfortunately, I let this crazy girl convince me,” I reply, pointing at Maddie who’s smiling like she won a prize.

“Crazy but persuasive,” Steve says, laughing.

“I was sure you wouldn’t come,” Luke adds, giving me his usual smirk.

His eyes sparkle.

It’s the kind of look that makes you feel seen.

“I didn’t think you liked this kind of thing,” Steve says.

“I don’t. But… here I am.”

“Well, if you get bored, you can always bet on me,” Steve jokes.

“Or on Kai,” Carol adds.

“Everyone’s betting on him.”

Kai.

His name hits my head before I even see him.

Then I see him.

Leaning against a black car, Jairo next to him.

Kai’s gaze is low, hands in his pockets, the kind of presence that doesn’t need words to be heard.

“Kai, I’m with you tonight,” someone says, walking up.

“If you don’t win, no one does.”

“Relax,” Kai replies, without looking at him.

“I don’t race to make others win.”

Jairo laughs.

“Same old Kai.

But this time… don’t go crazy.”

Kai looks at him. Says nothing.

Then she arrives.

A girl in leather pants, tight top, eyes that say ‘I know how to get what I want.’

She leans into Kai, whispers in his ear, brushes his arm.

Kai doesn’t push her away.

Doesn’t seek her.

But doesn’t avoid her either.

I look at him.

He hasn’t seen me.

Then our eyes meet.

And something shifts.

Kai moves her hand away.

“Enough, Tasha.”

Kai’s voice is firm.

He doesn’t raise it. He doesn’t need to.

The girl looks at him, surprised.

She’s not used to being told no.

Not by him.

“What’s wrong with you?” she asks, trying to read something in his eyes.

Kai doesn’t answer.

He’s looking elsewhere.

He’s looking… at me.

Tasha follows his gaze.

She sees me.

She doesn’t know me.

But she understands.

She walks away.

I stay still.

Carol comes closer.

“Kai?” I ask, trying not to sound too surprised.

“Yes, that’s him. He’s the strongest here. He wins almost every time,” Carol replies, like she’s talking about an Olympic champion.

“He’s a legend,” Steve adds.

“No one rides like him.”

Then Kai moves.

He steps away from the car.

Walks toward me.

My stomach tightens.

“What are you doing here?” he asks, stopping a step away from me.

“Why, is it forbidden?” I reply, a little annoyed.

I saw him with that girl.

And I didn’t think he did this kind of thing.

Motorcycles, bets, heart-stopping curves.

Jairo arrives, grinning.

“She’s new, huh?

Kai’s racing tonight. You know that, right?”

“Shut up, Jairo,” Kai says, without even looking at him.

Jairo laughs.

“What’s up, you wanna be a backliner?”

“A what?” I ask.

“Backliner. That’s what they call them here. The girls who sit behind the rider.

The ones who grab the flags in the curves.

The ones who make the difference.”

Kai jumps in.

“No.”

“Why?” I ask, crossing my arms.

“You think I’m scared?”

Jairo turns to a guy holding a helmet.

“Then do it with Denny.

He’s looking for a backliner.

He’s good. Not like Kai, but if you want to try…”

“No,” Kai says.

“No way.”

“Yes way,” I reply.

Maddie grabs my arm.

“Vale, are you crazy?

Do you even know what you’re supposed to do?

It’s dangerous. Not a joke.”

“I love danger,” I say, without thinking.

Kai looks at me.

I look at him.

And for a moment…

There’s no noise.

No crowd.

Just us.

“Maddie, tell me what to do.”

She looks at me, then sighs.

“Girls sit behind the rider, facing backwards.

There are three curves.

Each curve has a flag stuck between obstacles.

You have to grab it without throwing off the bike’s balance.

If you mess up, you’re out.

Whoever grabs all the flags and finishes first wins.

The others fight for second and third place based on how many flags they got.”

I nod.

I don’t tremble.

I don’t hesitate.

I walk toward Denny, the guy with the red bike and the kind eyes.

He looks at me, surprised.

I say nothing.

I take the helmet.

Put it on.

Get into position.

Kai watches me.

I feel it.

Even if he doesn’t touch me, even if he doesn’t speak.

He watches me as I climb onto the bike.

All the bikes line up.

Kai too.

With that girl.

I don’t know who she is.

I don’t care.

I don’t feel fear.

I only feel the need to prove something to myself, or maybe to him.

The crowd explodes.

Shouts, applause, bets being yelled.

The roar of the bikes is like thunder that never stops.

In the center of the starting line, there’s a girl.

Hair tied back, leather jacket, two flags in her hands.

One red, one black.

Kai looks at me.

I look at him.

Then the girl raises her arms.

A whistle.

She lowers them.

The bikes take off.

The noise is deafening.

Speed builds.

I grip the handles tightly.

The first curve comes.

I lean.

Follow the motion of the bike.

The flag is there.

I grab it.

I feel it in my fingers.

Adrenaline explodes in my chest.

Straight stretch.

I breathe.

Then the second curve.

Tighter.

But I feel like I can do it.

I lean again.

With effort.

I grab it.

Two out of three.

Then…

The third curve.

The hardest one.

I see a bike lose balance.

The girl behind leaned too far.

They fall.

The crowd screams.

Kai is ahead.

I zone out.

My mind empties.

Sounds amplify.

Anxiety takes over.

The flag is there.

I try.

The bike swerves.

Not much.

But enough to miss it.

Final stretch.

Denny speeds up.

I hold on tight.

But it’s no use.

Kai finishes first.

The bikes stop past the line.

Everyone cheers around him.

Kai takes off his helmet.

Me too.

The first thing he does…

Is look at me.

Like nothing else exists.

Just me.

I jump off the bike.

I look for Maddie and the others.

The crowd swallows me.

I panic.

I don’t know where to go.

I don’t know what to do.

So I walk.

I don’t know why.

I don’t know where.

The place is isolated.

I don’t know if I’ll find a taxi.

Or anything.

I walk.

Maybe because I didn’t expect this from myself.

Maybe because I don’t know who I am tonight.

My phone rings.

Maddie.

“Vale, where are you?”

“I’m fine, don’t worry.

I couldn’t find you in all that crowd.

I left.

I didn’t feel like staying anymore.”

“You sure you’re okay?”

“Yes.

We’ll talk later.”

I hang up.

I walk.

Still.

Alone.

Then…

A motorcycle.

I hear it coming from far away.

It stops in front of me.

Kai.

I step back.

I didn’t expect it.

Not like this.

Not now.

“Why did you do it?” he says.

“Did I need your permission?”

“Why did you run off so fast?”

“I didn’t feel like staying,” I reply.

“And why all these questions?”

I try to walk past the bike.

He’s standing in front of me.

He blocked my way.

I try again.

Nothing.

“Get on. I’ll take you.”

“No, thanks.”

“It’s completely isolated here.

Where do you think you’re going?

There’s no one around.

I doubt you want to walk all night.”

I look around.

He’s right.

I look at him.

He looks at me.

He doesn’t look away.

He holds out the helmet.

I take it.

And I get on.

Without knowing where that night would take me.

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