War
Avery's Point of View
Two months.
It sounds short when you say it out loud. Parang blink of an eye lang pero kapag ikaw mismo ang nasa loob, araw-araw mong iniikutan, it stretches like a new continent you're mapping with your feet.
Two months of Elliot as my boyfriend, and sometimes it feels like I've known this version of him forever. Minsan naman, parang day 1 pa rin na ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko sa bawat kaluskos niya.
And yes, the rumors are true. Kapag nagka-boyfriend ka raw, para ka na ring nagkaroon ng anak. I used to laugh, akala ko hyperbole lang. Pero ngayon? Totoo pala.
Elliot is living proof because hindi lang siya sweet at caring kase above all, makulit siya. As in makulit na may degree, thesis, at defense. He's the human version of an app that refuses to close every fifteen minutes may gentle ping. Kumain ka na? inom ka ng tubig? stretch break? like he's both notification and nurse.
He's sweet, caring, thoughtful pero may dagdag pang energy na parang bata na nakahanap ng bagong laro. When I'm studying, he'll poke my shoulder until mapatingin ako, para bang ikaw ang sun at siya ang buwan na naghihintay ng reflected light.
Kapag busy ako magsulat ng notes, he'll slide a post-it in front of me—may doodle ng constellations or isang chibi drawing namin na obviously siya ang nagkulay. And when I go quiet, lalapit siya, sabay sabi ng, "Do you still love me? Or may iba ka na?" in that teasing voice that makes me want to roll my eyes and kiss him just to shut him up.
It's like dating a golden retriever in a varsity jacket. Parang may built-in GPS siya pabalik sa 'kin na kahit lumayo ng konti, he circles back, tail wagging you can't see but you can feel.
He's affectionate, energetic, clingy in a way that should be annoying... pero hindi. I won't lie that I love it. 'Yung kakulitan niya ang background noise na hindi ko alam na hinahanap ko. Parang static sa radyo na akala mo interference lang, pero kapag nawala, masyadong tahimik at sumisipol ang utak ko.
At night, he insists na sabay kami mag-review.
"Accountability partners," sabi niya, like we're signing a treaty. But half the time, he's watching me instead of his screen, tapping his pen sa mesa in a rhythm that matches my breathing.
Sometimes he whispers trivia na walang kinalaman sa subject like "Alam mo ba, people blink about 15–20 times per minute?" sabay tingin ng seryoso, "You blink less when you're stressed, kaya i-blink mo 'yan." I roll my eyes, then blink on purpose. He smiles like he won a game.
Kung papayagan ng HU, baka i-enroll ko na siya sa daycare tuwing exam week. Ganun siya ka kulit. He is a houseplant that taps your shoulder for water, a browser tab that keeps popping back to the front, a sticky note that migrates to the center of the page kahit saan ko ilagay.
Pero sa totoo lang, doon ko rin nakikita 'yung care niya. That's the language he speaks. Repetition as devotion, reminders as touch, persistence as proof.
Sometimes I lie awake at night and revisit the decision which is 'yung yes na binitawan ko. Pinag-isipan ko 'yon and I let my walls lower inch by inch until there was room for a second heartbeat beside mine.
Do I regret it? Not even a little. If anything, parang nagbukas ang bintana sa kwarto ko. May hangin. May liwanag. He can be messy and too loud and endlessly makulit, but he's mine, and I'm his, and the claiming is gentle. Hindi nakakakulong, kundi nakakagaan.
My friends know. As in alam na alam. Elyza announced, "Finally, girl! The drought is over!" while waving a fry like a mic. Hazel teased na ang tagal ko raw nag-paasa.
"Char lang," she added, but I could hear the relief behind her laugh. Daphne almost cried when I told her OA, yes, pero I know what she was really saying. I'm glad you're safe. I'm glad you're happy. They keep giving me that look, 'yung halo ng joy at caution, and I take it with gratitude because they know the weather of this world.
Pero ang fam ko... ibang usapan. I haven't told them yet, especially Dad. It's not that nahihiya ako but precision. Gusto kong sabihin sa tamang oras, with the right words, in a way that shows what I see on how sincere he is, kung paano niya ako pinapahalagahan, and how this is not puppy love na lilipas with the semester.
This is the kind that learns to cook rice properly, that buys the right brand of band-aid, that remembers which mornings are hard and shows up anyway.
He has a thousand little habits that orbit me. In the morning, he times his first greeting with the café opening, "Kape?", like he's syncing watches with a co-conspirator. Sa hall, he walks on the traffic side kahit campus lang 'to, as if a rogue skateboard could be a truck.
When I'm locked in writing, he parks a snack beside my laptop. Crackers, one chocolate, at minsan, a note that just says, Proud of you. The notes are small, cheap paper, but they feel like receipts for a future we're quietly paying for.
Sometimes he overdoes it. Syempre. Minsan ang dami niyang tanong.
"Kumain ka na? Uminom ka na? Kumusta paper mo? Kumusta puso mo?", that I have to lift a hand and say, "Wait." He freezes, then nods, and I watch him recalibrate in real time, like he's closing app windows one by one to free up RAM. "Copy," he says. "I'll hover farther." Tapos tatawa kami pareho, because hover farther is still hovering, and we both know that's his nature.
At may humor siya, Diyos ko.
"Alam mo ba," he whispered once while we were both pretending to read, "that koalas sleep up to 22 hours a day?"
I looked up, suspicious. "So what's the point?" He shrugged. "Kung koala ka, I will simply sit in the remaining two hours and watch you exist."
Corny pero aaminin ko, it's sweet. I groaned, then smiled. That's us, anyway. Groan, then smile, tease, then soften, argue, then place fruit on each other's plates.
Two months of Elliot. Dalawang buwan ng tawa, kulit, at mga sorpresa na parang maliit na fireworks sa ordinaryong hapon. If this is only the prologue, excited ako sa mga susunod na chapter.
I know there will be bad weather. May ulan, may kulog, may cancelled classes of the heart, but I also know we have umbrellas and a running list of inside jokes. And that counts for so much.
Because if loving him feels like babysitting the sweetest, most impossible golden retriever one that brings me slippers I didn't know I dropped, sits by the door until I'm ready, and insists on a walk exactly when I've forgotten how to move then sign me up. Forever, kung pwede. Or at least, for as long as we keep choosing each other, araw-araw, in small ways that add up to a home.
And tomorrow, when the day taps my shoulder again, alam kong andoon siya, hindi para guluhin, kundi para alalahanin ako sa sarili kong buhay. That's the kind of noise I want to grow old with... persistent, warm, at laging pabalik sa akin.
At ito nga pala ang chika about sa endearment naming dalawa.
Nag-date kaming dalawa sa maliit na ramen place near campus, the kind that feels like a hug in a bowl. Maingay ang kusina, pero between clinks and steam, naka-lean si Elliot sa table, parang may mini presentation siya na cute at seryoso at the same time.
He started with a grin, sabi niya simple lang daw ang usapan tonight, ang official endearment namin. He called me Pillow, and then he explained it like it was both science and soft heart.
"Ikaw ang pahinga ko," malumanay niyang sabi, his eyes steady habang humihigop ako ng sabaw.
"You hold my weight when I am tired, tapos hindi ka bumibigay. You keep my scent, you keep my secrets, at hindi mo ako pinapahiya. Hindi ka prop, ikaw ang pahinga." I laughed because ang lakas maka-cheesy, pero totoo rin ang init na naramdaman ko sa dibdib. I know I am blushing at the moment.
Tapos siya naman ang Blanket.
"Ako ang kumot na hindi masikip," nakangiti niyang dagdag, ang kamay niya ay nakapatong sa table like he meant every word.
"I cover you when you shiver, tapos I back off kapag naiinitan ka. I protect without trapping, I warm without weighing you down. Parang weather app na marunong mag-adjust, pero tao, pero boyfriend." I rolled my eyes a little, pero alam kong kilig na kilig din ako dahil ang linaw ng intent.
He moved on to rules na hindi pwersado, parang gentle guide lang. Rule one ay duty call, kapag pagod ako, Blanket shows up, no questions asked. Rule two ay head rest, kapag busy ako, five minutes lang sa Pillow mode, walang kulitan sobra. Rule three ay consent system, if I say stop, Blanket folds, if he says wait, Pillow stays but quiet. Rule four ay night checks, two taps means water, three taps means hug. Rule five ay pending pa, ewan ko ba rito.
May code words din na parang secret handshake. Fluff means tubig at snack, mabilis at discreet. Fold means space muna, no interrogation. Tuck means hug na malambing, hindi mabigat. Air means inhale sabay, phones down, tahimik lang para humupa ang ugong sa ulo. I wrote them in my head habang umiinit pa ang cheeks ko, kasi ang nerdy at ang sweet, parehong sabay.
He told me why Pillow made sense beyond cute.
"You catch tears," mahina niyang saad, like confession na walang drama.
"When life stings, hindi ka umiiwas. You let me breathe." And I believed him, kasi nakita ko na 'yon sa mga tahimik naming gabi.
"He framed Blanket the same way, I make space for your changing weather, half cover kapag mainit ang ulo, full cover kapag lumalamig ang mundo." I nodded because the picture fit, parang kumot na sakto ang kapal.
After the rules, he pulled out his phone. Nickname ko raw magiging Pillow with star and cloud. Ako naman, I set his contact to Blanket with a tiny blue square, parang folded edge ng kumot.
"Field test later," He playfully said, and I pressed my chopsticks together like a salute. Test accepted, sabi ng puso ko, kahit tahimik ang bibig ko.
On the walk back, naglakad siya sa traffic side kahit sidewalk lang, habit na hindi na niya iniisip. He brushed my knuckles, light lang, tapos nag-practice kami ng code words na parang game. Fluff, he offered water. Fold, he gave me space habang nag-aayos ako ng bag. Tuck, he asked for a hug na hindi demanding. Air, huminga kami sabay, counting in and out, and the night felt less noisy.
I kept thinking na hindi lang ito pet name. It felt like job description na may kasamang puso.
Pillow means I am soft when needed and firm when he spirals, present sa morning check and honest sa night recap.
Blanket means he is warmth without weight, cover without cage, room for my feet to wiggle when I change my mind. We smiled at how silly it sounded in theory, then we kept it anyway, kasi it worked in practice.
Before we split for the night, tinesting niya ang closing line with the same brave face he used sa ramen table.
"Good night, Pillow," malinaw niyang sabi, walang arte and I answered softly.
"Good night, Blanket," and the words felt like a small light I could pocket for later. Hindi siya fireworks, more like a lamp na laging naka-on kapag umuulan sa isip.
So yes, official na ang tawagan namin, born on a simple date na may sabaw at tawanan. It sounds playful, pero para sa amin, it is care with edges that do not cut.
It is love that has boundaries, love na marunong mag-adjust, love na may language na kayang sumalo at magtakip. And when tomorrow taps my shoulder, alam kong ready ang Pillow at Blanket protocol. Choose each other, every day, in small ways that add up to home.
Fast forward to present, nasa dorm kami. Ready na ako for class, hair tied and shoes on, habang si Elliot tulog pa like a happy burrito sa duvet. Umupo ako sa tabi niya, kasi ang gulo ng buhok niya pero ang ayos pa rin tignan, parang effortless idol na bagong gising.
Nag-vibrate ang phone. It's a message from an unknown number.
[Hi, my princess. Miss me? -₩]
Parang may yelo na dumaan sa spine ko, as in biglang nanlamig ang kamay ko. Akala ko tapos na ang chapter na 'yon, like tapos na ang storm, pero apparently hindi pa pala. Whoever this Mr. ₩ is, hindi pa tapos ang laban, and I hate that may shadow pa rin sa likod ng araw ko.
"Good morning, Pillow," bulong ni Elliot mula sa likod, na biglang yumakap na parang kumot.
"Good morning din, Blanket," sagot ko, trying to smile kahit may kaba na kumakapit sa dibdib ko like a clingy cloud. I tucked the phone sa pocket, kasi ayoko munang sirain ang morning namin.
"Tulog muna tayo ulit," pilit niya, niyapos niya ako pati paa.
"Hoy, nakapang school uniform na ako, please," tawa-sigaw ko, "huwag mo lukutin ang damit ko, hello attendance." I tried to wiggle free, pero mas humigpit pa siya, parang toddler na ayaw magpa-CR.
"Date na lang tayo, Pillow," asar niyang sabi, eyes half closed pero may ngiti na pang-akit. "Absent muna tayo today, promise I will take care of your notes."
"Ambaho ng hininga mo, maligo ka nga muna," pikon kong sagot, kahit joke lang and actually ang fresh niya. I needed the tease to reset my nerves.
"Kiss kita riyan," banta niya, his voice is soft, and tumaas talaga balahibo ko not in a bad way.
"Maligo ka na nga," tawa ko, sabay tulak sa kanya papuntang banyo, like go soldier go. "Quick shower, then real life."
He shuffled inside with a salute, tap water on, humming pa ng off-key na love song. The second sumara ang pinto, tumayo ako, kinuha ko bag, and lumabas ako ng dorm nang mabilis, like sprint light.
"Sorry, Blanket," sigaw ko sa pinto, half laugh and half takas. "See you sa campus."
Habang naglalakad ako papuntang campus, huminto ako sandali sa may gate and looked up. Sky was bright and parang new page, pero may maliit na stain na hindi ko mabura.
Masaya ako, legit, kasi may warmth ako na binibigay at tinatanggap araw araw. Pero alam ko rin na hindi pa tapos ang kwento naming lahat, and I need to be brave and very precise. Kung babalik ang Mr. ₩ sa script, I will choose my lines with care, I will choose my team, and I will choose myself.
Elliot's Point of View
I walked into campus with that weird static in my chest. Hindi ko ma-pinpoint kung gutom lang ba ako or may kulang. I kept checking corners like may hinihintay ako na hindi ko ma-name. Maybe it is Avery. Maybe it is trouble. Baka both. I told myself to relax.
The hallway smelled like floor polish and late assignments. Then I saw her. Si Avery. Nakaupo sa bench near the window, phone in her hand, brow furrowed. The light on her face was soft but her shoulders were tight. My body shifted before my brain. I moved.
"Hey," I said, like casual lang. Like normal Tuesday.
She nodded with no smile. No anything. The static got louder. I hate that look on her. 'Yung parang may wave na tumama and she is bracing alone. Blanket mode. Warmth without weight, cover without cage.
"Anong meron, Pillow," I asked. I already knew something was off. My voice tried to be gentle. My hands stayed still.
She lifted her phone. No words. A single screen.
[Hi, my princess. Miss me? -₩]
My blood spiked. Tangina. Here we go again. Hindi pa rin tapos ang taong 'to. I felt the urge to grab the phone and call back and burn the world down.
I sat beside her. Close enough to count her lashes. Far enough for her air.
"Bakit ngayon mo lang sinabi," I asked, steady as I could manage even if my fists were trying to curl.
She looked at me, sharp and tired. "Tingin mo ba okay pa ang timing. Kagigising ko lang sa bangungot tapos susundan ng ganyan."
"Fair," I said. The word felt small. "Pero Avery, kahit ganoon, dapat sinasabi mo sa amin. Sa akin. You know how much you matter to me." My voice warmed on its own. I hated the idea that she carried this alone for even five minutes.
She met my eyes. "Oo. Kaya nga ako natatakot."
"Bakit," I asked, and my heart leaned forward. I knew the why but I wanted to hear her shape it. Words are handles. Pag walang words, nadudulas ang hawak.
"Because the more na lumalapit ako sa inyo, lalo na sa'yo, the more na parang may humahabol sa 'kin," she said. "Parang ang dami kong sinasaktan. Pati sarili ko."
There it was. The thing under the bed. I wanted to swear loyalty and law all at once. I wanted to give her ten exits and one home. I reached for her hand. I waited for her fingers to meet me. They did.
"Pero Pillow," I said, careful and clear.
"We're here. I am here. You are not a burden. Hindi ka sumpa. You are the reason I set alarms and buy the right snacks and sleep like a human." I felt stupid saying it out loud and also like it was oxygen.
I pulled her in lightly and she let me. I kissed her forehead. That felt like a prayer I actually believe.
"Tingnan mo ako," I said.
"I do not care kung may psycho na sumusunod. I do not care kung every week may threat. What I care about is you. Safe ka. At mas okay ako kapag hindi mo ako tinataboy." I added.
She let out a small laugh. Weak but real. The kind that cracks a window open.
"Ang drama mo," she said.
"Excuse me," I smiled.
"Ikaw ang nagwawala kapag hindi kita ginugulo buong araw." It came out teasing to break the fog. My chest loosened an inch.
"Sira," she said, and there it was. A curve on her mouth. The exact one that tells me the ground is still under us.
"'Yan ang smile na gusto ko," I whispered.
My fear talked too. What if I am not enough. What if Mr. ₩ is a shadow she thinks she owes. What if the past is a hook with her name on it. I told fear to sit.
I am not the solution. I am support. I will not try to be her entire map. I will be a reliable streetlight. I will be the water fountain that still works at midnight. I will be the hand that knocks once and waits.
I squeezed her hand once.
"Laro tayo. One step at a time," I said. "Kung ayaw mong pag-usapan now, I will not push. If you want to plan, I can write the list. If you want quiet, I can count your breaths."
She nodded.
"Quiet muna," she said.
So I leaned back with her. We watched the window. A leaf drifted across the glass. My brain wanted to chase numbers and names. My heart wanted to memorize her pulse against my thumb. I chose her pulse. I chose now.
"Air," I said softly, testing our code. She smiled a little and matched my inhale. Four in. Hold two. Four out. The moment steadied.
"Thank you," she whispered. "Hindi ko sure kung hanggang kailan 'to. Pero I want to keep choosing us."
Avery's Point of View
Nakakairita talaga minsan si Elliot. Ang kulit, ang lambing, ang clingy, yet he is also the calm in my noise. Kaya kahit may Mr. ₩ na gumugulo, hindi ko siya kayang itulak palayo. Behind all the scary parts, siya ang feeling safe.
I mean, who else kisses your forehead at nine in the morning while may death threat ka pa sa inbox. Ako lang, apparently. Ako lang ang sira-ulong in love.
"Okay fine. Sasabihin ko lahat simula ngayon," sabi ko, voice low but sure.
"Promise?" he asked, eyes steady.
"Pinky swear pa gusto mo," I answered, holding up a finger.
"Tsk," he said, and we both laughed. My phone buzzed again.
[This is just a preview. Don't get too comfortable. -₩]
Humigpit ang hawak ko sa phone. I felt my stomach drop. Napatingin ako kay Elliot and nakita niya rin agad and his jaw set.
"Shit," bulong niya.
Tumayo siya and I watched his thumbs fly. Group chat namin with Tyler, Tyron, and Edward lit up. Meanwhile I gripped the phone like it could anchor me.
"Tingin mo sinusundan ako ngayon," tanong ko, hoping the answer was no.
"Honestly, possible," he said, calm pero alert.
"Pero hindi ka na nag-iisa ngayon." I nodded. "I know."
A few minutes later, dumating sina Tyler, Edward, at Tyron. Halatang hiningal pa from jogging across campus. Tyler wiped his nape with his sleeve.
"Anong meron," tanong niya, breath uneven.
"Si Mr. ₩. Nag-message ulit," sagot ni Elliot, showing them the screen. Edward pulled out his phone with a serious face. "We need to call someone."
"Like who," tanong ko, trying to keep my voice from shaking.
"Someone who can trace the number," he said.
"Pwede nating kausapin ang campus security. Pwede rin ang telco fraud team through a proper report. I have a contact." Tyron scanned the hallway like human CCTV. "We move to a brighter area. Maraming tao. Then we plan."
We shifted near the window. Light on our faces. Noise from students passing. Safety by visibility. Elliot stood half a step in front of me. Not blocking and just there.
"Air," he whispered. I matched his breathing. Four in. Hold two. Four out. My hands stopped shaking a little.
"Game plan," sabi ni Tyler.
"Short term. Block the number now. Screenshot the messages. Time and place. Send to our shared folder." Edward nodded.
"I will make the incident report draft. If you approve, I will email security. Then I will ask my contact what is legal and fast. Walang cowboy moves."
"Tyron, ikaw," Elliot said.
"Ikot ka muna near gates and common spots. Kung may suspicious, picture with timestamp. Huwag lalapit. Huwag lalagpas sa rules." Tyron nodded. "Copy. Babalik ako in ten."
I looked at Elliot. He kept his voice level, like briefing before an exam. Inside his eyes, may storm, yet he was holding the line.
"Pillow, you with me," he asked, very quiet.
"With you," sagot ko. My chest eased.
Nag vibrate ulit ang phone ko but this time alerts from the group chat. Tyler dropped a map of safe routes. Edward sent a template for reports. Elliot added a checklist titled Today. Walk together. Sit near exit. Share live location. Check in at lunch. Debrief at five. It looked simple. It looked like a hand I could hold.
"Block mo muna," sabi ni Edward, pointing gently. I hovered. "Kaya mo," sabi ni Elliot, not pushing. I hit block. My finger trembled then landed. Done.
"Good," Tyler said. "Next. I will walk behind you. Elliot on your left. Edward on your right. Para tayong awkward sandwich but I do not care."
"Awkward pero cute," I said, laughing a bit. The laugh sounded like a window opening. Elliot's mouth curved.
"That is the smile I like," bulong niya.
We started moving as a group. I could feel eyes on us, or maybe imagination lang. Either way, mas okay na prepared. At the corner, Tyron reappeared.
"Clear for now," report niya. "Pero may isang guy na parang too interested sa bulletin board. Baka coincidence lang."
Elliot nodded.
"Noted. Hindi tayo mag fi finger point. We stay smart. We stay kind. We stay visible." He glanced at me. "Consent check. Okay ka ba to file later. Puwede ring bukas."
"Let us file today," sabi ko. "Kahit mahirap, tapusin na."
"Copy," he said. His hand hovered near mine. Not touching without asking.
"Tuck," bulong ko. He slipped his fingers into mine. Warm but light. Exactly right.
We reached a busier quad. Edward stepped aside to make a call.
"Hi. Good morning. We need guidance on a harassment text. Student safety case. I can send screenshots," narinig ko. Tyler kept scanning. Tyron marked spots on the map. Elliot watched my face more than the crowd, like his compass was set to me.
For once, lahat sila seryoso. No jokes. No clowning and pure team. I realized something while standing there with my awkward sandwich. This is not just some random psycho. This is a line we draw and we hold. It felt like war but also like a neighborhood watch powered by love.
Nag vibrate phone ni Edward.
"They will take it," sabi niya after the call.
"They will coordinate with security. We send files. We keep routine normal but safer." Tyler exhaled. "Okay. Step one complete."
"Step two," Elliot said.
"We go to class and steal back the day." He turned to me. "Pillow, you lead. Kami ang background."
I looked at them. My strange army. My softest shield.
"Thank you," sabi ko.
We walked. Sun on our shoulders. Noise on both sides. Heart steady enough to take notes.
War, yes, but guided. And for the first time since the message, I felt like the story could still go our way.
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