"Nothing heals heartbreak like screaming Olivia Rodrigo at full volume."
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGYdHi4Jb7V
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03wjY5SCnn
Subject: pettiest playlist of the year goes to… me
eli.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQB2TRkN7S
i made a playlist titled “for when your groupmate uses comic sans and your faith in humanity breaks.”98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFTRtHIxGQQ
i’m currently scream-singing to track 4 while eating cereal with a fork because all my spoons are in the sink.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCNZ5tBQNq0
it’s a mood.
– maya98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUp5QYPQrwi
sad. dramatic. cereal-forking.
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbCfN7ARZy
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuS21TvYPi
Subject: cereal fork is a vibe
maya.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sSxCCaTMF
track 4 better be “good 4 u” or i’m calling the authorities.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOFjBXDv68P
also, the fork thing is valid. i once drank iced coffee with a knife. no regrets.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8PlYgb4ZDL
send me the playlist. for... peer review.
– eli98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQjXJyi5Fa0
music snob, chaos enabler
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRpFoLnE7q
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRNb7PlTK7
Subject: attached: rage therapy 💕
okay you asked for it.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOK8rqM1ydw
enjoy: [https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4mtUmL00VaYfC0gkEH0Odt?si=uPQWcd-5RuGOfoOppIcfQg] “dear god why do men” — a playlist in five stages of grief, three accidental crushes, and one cup of weaponized spite.
tracklist highlights:
misery business – paramore
better than revenge – taylor swift
good 4 u – olivia rodrigo
brutal – also olivia, my queen
should’ve said no – taylor again, obviously
kill bill – sza (i don’t condone murder, but i vibe)
– maya98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2n0zdCWWd
the most dramatic person you never met
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxZNWChqIu
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyJvrGz5OC
Subject: playlist review: violently iconic
maya.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahrxG8Hm7e
i have goosebumps.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc3Hp21shL1
i want to fight someone. i don’t even know who. but i’m hyped.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2AAdhenzxB
“kill bill” came on and i almost texted my ex “good luck.”98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxorVVtalB
i didn’t. but spiritually, i did.
also: “dear god why do men” deserves a grammy for best emotional support.
– eli98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0wmMKY6Uh
threatened. inspired.
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1YWC8PubN
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTH02sRjbDU
Subject: so we’re rage soulmates now?
eli,98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYsPDgy2ir
you passed the vibe check.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOK2aUWHjtd
you didn’t question my musical angst or my cereal fork.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYThy5XQVU6
this feels like the start of something irrationally comforting.
ps: have you ever cried to phoebe bridgers in a parking lot or is that just me?
– maya98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMPaIaSdcb
emotionally stable adjacent
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7dfOGQfOy
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sFQ9rDBuk
Subject: phoebe bridgers made me cry at the DMV
maya.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxdpP9Dpa7S
“motion sickness” came on. i was holding a ticket that said A132.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3obCSeHHo
i did cry.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv8SNuoYZph
the security guard offered me a tissue and a mint.
so yes. we’re bonded now.
– eli98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7oPhD6wat
co-president, feelings club
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmmTYwuNZV
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2if3oDtjk
Subject: certified mood
i would like to formally nominate you as:
my email pen pal
my official heartbreak soundtrack consultant
and co-author of “texts we never sent but emotionally screamed”
it’s a growing resume. benefits include emotional chaos and unsolicited memes.
– maya98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI6v0e6oG0R
possibly your new internet pen friend
From: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKWiqjysVT
To: [email protected]98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1BEXV3mOlt
Subject: i accept the role
with great inbox comes great responsibility.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuGfEmhrgn
you send the songs, i’ll send the sarcasm.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyw1HLLFCA
together we’re like...98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeulUV654Ul
the emotional avengers.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmDE4Q7AiXr
no capes though. just playlists.
– eli98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5yaC5RGje
ready to rage, reply, repeat
Attachment: Liner Notes from Eli Martin98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0reIGjtt3
🎧 “dear god why do men” – Reviewed
📝 liner notes by eli, who has clearly felt too much and judged too many fonts
Track 1: Misery Business – Paramore98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHGxvRN92sA
this track made me want to break up with someone i’m not dating.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxnvKRsi1A
⭐ rage level: 9.5/10
Track 2: Better Than Revenge – Taylor Swift98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxG4DT2YcUG
may have shouted “she’s not a saint!” at a squirrel.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTohL9oXrrm
⭐ sass factor: 11/10
Track 3: good 4 u – Olivia Rodrigo98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSkvpJOudaE
screamed into a spoon. felt better.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMHQKfScNT
⭐ catharsis: 10/10
Track 4: brutal – Olivia Rodrigo98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx2fk96hmgL
i knocked over a lamp. worth it.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvdULVr8AKg
⭐ chaos energy: unmeasurable
Track 5: should’ve said no – Taylor Swift98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4AwPyrX0ec
the rain cried for me.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVN7EFUkQFq
⭐ drama: peak
Track 6: Kill Bill – SZA98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcYcvl5PA6
i do not condone murder. but i understand.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡravlCFYJIz
⭐ emotional weaponry: activated
Final thoughts:98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyArXI8VBn
this playlist isn't therapy. it's exorcism.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5KcHWR23oB
i feel seen, personally attacked, and spiritually lighter.98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2JLk9kWuWO
maya, if you ever make another one — please consider me your chaos consultant.
– eli98Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwp9yhUOOpC
officially unwell in a poetic way
然後按「加至主畫面」