"Nothing heals heartbreak like screaming Olivia Rodrigo at full volume."
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwiCjIFyLTM
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWdKGuZqIre
Subject: pettiest playlist of the year goes to… me
eli.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuLv3xsoPk
i made a playlist titled “for when your groupmate uses comic sans and your faith in humanity breaks.”88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5wpc0zSxR
i’m currently scream-singing to track 4 while eating cereal with a fork because all my spoons are in the sink.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRrLSQcbpO
it’s a mood.
– maya88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMC3u2ogctK
sad. dramatic. cereal-forking.
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKaWn4oqulM
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2yI0X5Ren
Subject: cereal fork is a vibe
maya.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvreOoF7QTP
track 4 better be “good 4 u” or i’m calling the authorities.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLq3V97dUl
also, the fork thing is valid. i once drank iced coffee with a knife. no regrets.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RyxK5SwQE
send me the playlist. for... peer review.
– eli88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjoDTabPc2w
music snob, chaos enabler
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSfMcyZtGl
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ESvLBOFjJ
Subject: attached: rage therapy 💕
okay you asked for it.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0J6hnYzIvj
enjoy: [https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4mtUmL00VaYfC0gkEH0Odt?si=uPQWcd-5RuGOfoOppIcfQg] “dear god why do men” — a playlist in five stages of grief, three accidental crushes, and one cup of weaponized spite.
tracklist highlights:
misery business – paramore
better than revenge – taylor swift
good 4 u – olivia rodrigo
brutal – also olivia, my queen
should’ve said no – taylor again, obviously
kill bill – sza (i don’t condone murder, but i vibe)
– maya88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLw02d5vtH
the most dramatic person you never met
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkhBMNhj2WG
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3PblbwLOO
Subject: playlist review: violently iconic
maya.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUG6UR7X2FR
i have goosebumps.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMcdB8doko
i want to fight someone. i don’t even know who. but i’m hyped.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQXTX1DMl6
“kill bill” came on and i almost texted my ex “good luck.”88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkKyEGKIhM
i didn’t. but spiritually, i did.
also: “dear god why do men” deserves a grammy for best emotional support.
– eli88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCwEMmb6fo
threatened. inspired.
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVeaRwDCNQK
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCj8xZwYAGQ
Subject: so we’re rage soulmates now?
eli,88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NvY2rJS9C
you passed the vibe check.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TFvXpJh1d
you didn’t question my musical angst or my cereal fork.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3mFebWT7Tb
this feels like the start of something irrationally comforting.
ps: have you ever cried to phoebe bridgers in a parking lot or is that just me?
– maya88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35gvHHnePr
emotionally stable adjacent
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOxbZUZS6G
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDixwPNuqmA
Subject: phoebe bridgers made me cry at the DMV
maya.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJ7fk4g6lJ
“motion sickness” came on. i was holding a ticket that said A132.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtn8fv67h8b
i did cry.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUjCOKnHUv
the security guard offered me a tissue and a mint.
so yes. we’re bonded now.
– eli88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIokuPljLaq
co-president, feelings club
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbXd8extBV
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlj0R7dav1y
Subject: certified mood
i would like to formally nominate you as:
my email pen pal
my official heartbreak soundtrack consultant
and co-author of “texts we never sent but emotionally screamed”
it’s a growing resume. benefits include emotional chaos and unsolicited memes.
– maya88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXMzK341Z0
possibly your new internet pen friend
From: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqCbKF6jbN
To: [email protected]88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtarDAGawyx
Subject: i accept the role
with great inbox comes great responsibility.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9ImtMip5f
you send the songs, i’ll send the sarcasm.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs6zmtHDhEP
together we’re like...88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAnSa6XY1tQ
the emotional avengers.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9CWIClygD
no capes though. just playlists.
– eli88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XCc7uthwH
ready to rage, reply, repeat
Attachment: Liner Notes from Eli Martin88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTfPv617gw
🎧 “dear god why do men” – Reviewed
📝 liner notes by eli, who has clearly felt too much and judged too many fonts
Track 1: Misery Business – Paramore88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFZzOgEvG3
this track made me want to break up with someone i’m not dating.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCc1X3b1sCA
⭐ rage level: 9.5/10
Track 2: Better Than Revenge – Taylor Swift88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddErUU36eA
may have shouted “she’s not a saint!” at a squirrel.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNfcvL8Pel
⭐ sass factor: 11/10
Track 3: good 4 u – Olivia Rodrigo88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLSFHLquxN1
screamed into a spoon. felt better.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIubn8P6aVg
⭐ catharsis: 10/10
Track 4: brutal – Olivia Rodrigo88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjSrs9Vckl
i knocked over a lamp. worth it.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2Dn9vC7Mi
⭐ chaos energy: unmeasurable
Track 5: should’ve said no – Taylor Swift88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9He0gU4wID
the rain cried for me.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEa15RhNSa5
⭐ drama: peak
Track 6: Kill Bill – SZA88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcDuWVaT5U
i do not condone murder. but i understand.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7J3H8YUuMu
⭐ emotional weaponry: activated
Final thoughts:88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZhVZxiX9P3
this playlist isn't therapy. it's exorcism.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiGF8eIfQue
i feel seen, personally attacked, and spiritually lighter.88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx7pI6jkYBD
maya, if you ever make another one — please consider me your chaos consultant.
– eli88Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPe0QXxxl8
officially unwell in a poetic way
然後按「加至主畫面」