|| 8:00 pm ||
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIcZ4E5cdY
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPsbPfhoCpu
Subject: Schedule confirmation + passive-aggressive muffin update
hi eli,18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd4UiuMUWRN
just confirming the 2PM group meeting this thursday at Hume Hall still stands.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtjoPk4yN0
also, erin brought in those weird protein muffins again. no one ate them. she’s pretending not to notice.
— maya
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVYeqrNDCs
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvvzVZQHMmn
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa6s3VspYkG
Subject: I think I’m the wrong Eli
Hey Maya,18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN50BX9bkpv
You’ve got the wrong Eli.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeJLFqbpy9
I would love to say I was scheduled for a group meeting, but I am currently eating cereal on my couch, pants-less, and I don’t know anyone named Erin (or her offensive muffins).
Best of luck though. Team meetings and baked disappointment sound like a vibe.
– Not-Your-Eli18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7atXntpwu
aka Eli Martin
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqQoyH1X6j
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhZTDgwiPX
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6UKR5jMk8
Subject: 😂 oh my god sorry
oh. my. god.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFt8yxKuViV
definitely wrong eli.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQMdIaacD6
also, the mental image of you pants-less eating cereal? horrifying — and weirdly relatable.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7HjvjX2da
sincerely,18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqr0C3XnmPp
a girl who can no longer face protein muffins or group emails
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8ZtvGB4oL
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhUIJGXicX
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvQhhoeoYw
Subject: the muffin has been notified
No worries. Happens more than you'd think.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmJtphMSBdI
A guy once sent me his grocery list. It was 100% just “almond milk, floss, condoms, hot Cheetos.”18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAp6MY0H30M
No context. I still think about him.
Tell Erin I support her, but also: maybe try banana bread.
– Eli (the wrong one, but apparently memorable)
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7tWYtzXn0
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlvCxqjvUB
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpeGl1qhOhg
Subject: wrong but kind of right
you’re honestly better than the eli i was trying to reach.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL8ReS7uEnn
he once used Comic Sans in a group doc.
ps. banana bread is god tier. erin could never.
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWEQUeNYzvD
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiFd6YU6jP5
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7HwovgESdZ
Subject: justice for banana bread
maya,18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmaATop9Yiz
is this our meet-cute?18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpZEKzhSTHx
like in a chaotic email inbox kind of way?
you insulted a guy’s muffins, complimented banana bread, and accidentally messaged me.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrOACQHDPu5
i don’t know. feels cinematic.
– still not your eli18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp0dyWAi6vd
but i might be a decent one
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkHP41twl7X
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlTozfwvGo
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTp6lbMGZPf
Subject: definitely a netflix pilot
if this becomes a romance — it better have a 90s soundtrack and questionable fashion.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSCyny6R6S
(i call dibs on overalls and sad-girl eyeliner.)18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡruo1PenIjU
also: are we still emailing or is this where it ends?
just asking for… curiosity reasons.
– maya18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6VxFOAFwk
professional emailer of strangers
18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTiJWTAcVC3
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK79hryHopZ
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvvfSkpZZJ6
Subject: only weird if we stop
nah. let’s keep emailing.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxrpahiNki
it’s kind of the most interesting thing that’s happened to me this week.
plus i want more muffin drama. and maybe your spotify recs.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKiiXVHzPHb
purely academic interest, of course.
– eli
From: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqXxdTwGmyo
To: [email protected]18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6M7EIrdRf
Subject: Re: only weird if we stop
glad you’re on board — who knew muffin drama could bring two wrong elis together?
also, if you start a support group for victims of questionable baked goods, count me in as president.
looking forward to more of your cereal pants stories and maybe some actual muffin updates.
— maya18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPDPfx9iUBd
professional emailer of strangers
P.S. what’s your all-time worst muffin crime? asking for a friend.18Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNBiK7FBV6
然後按「加至主畫面」