「C牌的亞洲代表試鏡。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAzo2GJqUd3h
5Please respect copyright.PENANArfeoHy8jg2
小川鈴把試鏡通知書列印出來,擺在星野莉奈面前,「這是所有模特兒夢寐以求的機會。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAQp9mqs8Fil
5Please respect copyright.PENANAcWCgAZ5Jh5
「巴黎總部親自點名、名單未公開、全球同步關注。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAWGnAHKGGFH
5Please respect copyright.PENANAc3qmt2EFkd
——光是這些條件,足以讓任何人心動。5Please respect copyright.PENANAyknxWzH7yo
5Please respect copyright.PENANA3ob7uGYeTq
小川鈴頓了頓,語氣依然穩定:「妳這幾個月的成績都有被看見。這次被點進名單,不是運氣,是對妳現階段的認可——也是,該來的考題。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAJ8wIBVcma2
5Please respect copyright.PENANAaNpTKybca9
小川鈴看著星野莉奈,沒有過分鼓勵,也沒有任何威脅:5Please respect copyright.PENANArhcSoK5QEZ
5Please respect copyright.PENANAQvX4DharDO
「競爭會很激烈。但不去就沒有機會。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAYq54Ron8Rj
5Please respect copyright.PENANAlhfBj2Ifcr
星野莉奈看著那張紙。遲遲沒有伸手接過去。5Please respect copyright.PENANANPxRnxLTaP
5Please respect copyright.PENANAjU0rvJ2jI4
她當然知道,這種通知不會無緣無故落在誰桌上。5Please respect copyright.PENANArGTfpttBEC
一旦去了,她的名字可能就不只是「星野莉奈Rina」,而是——「被C牌點過名的星野莉奈Rina」。5Please respect copyright.PENANAMZIHpVQbq8
5Please respect copyright.PENANAoiDY5huhdd
但她的手還是沒動,那張紙太輕,也太重。5Please respect copyright.PENANACyreLDKHV3
5Please respect copyright.PENANAMiok65ESvQ
她在回家後,陷在客廳的沙發裡,一動也不動地盯著那封轉寄來的email。5Please respect copyright.PENANAoD3UhzirQ6
信件標題像在提醒她:「這裡是世界的門口,請進來。」5Please respect copyright.PENANARPRWgY6kvV
5Please respect copyright.PENANAup274brDSe
機會來了。5Please respect copyright.PENANARM2v5cyytX
星野莉奈不怕上台、不怕鏡頭,也不怕一句話就讓萬千視線聚焦在自己身上的高風險。5Please respect copyright.PENANAfy6nttfBZY
5Please respect copyright.PENANAwlqSAfrOla
但她的視線,卻一次次地被手機畫面拉走——5Please respect copyright.PENANAxDW3G677Pf
5Please respect copyright.PENANANG9lKxdQZt
對話框的頂端,仍是糸師冴的名字。5Please respect copyright.PENANAIgUfkmOqM5
她沒有傳訊息、也沒問他意見,只是靜靜看著那個名字,像是在凝視一個她不敢離開的座標。5Please respect copyright.PENANAyw8pP0KFHz
5Please respect copyright.PENANAdqDwpWksOE
她試過說服自己:「五天而已,拍完就回來。」5Please respect copyright.PENANA8i24CZzVn9
也試過安慰自己:「這是躍升一線模特兒的機會,是為了更長遠的未來。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAuQBwLcgCWH
5Please respect copyright.PENANAa6kE49B2CF
她抬起頭,目光落在客廳牆上的那張等身海報。5Please respect copyright.PENANATaMNyZmt0p
照片中的模特兒笑得優雅而自信,眼神清澈得像能穿透濃霧,彷彿正對她低語:5Please respect copyright.PENANAfxsVzgJmNp
5Please respect copyright.PENANAR0KGctRqFI
——這是屬於妳的舞台,它在等妳走上前來。5Please respect copyright.PENANAu4KZB4cgFc
5Please respect copyright.PENANAq0bYncQtk3
像某個信念,正在輕聲召喚——5Please respect copyright.PENANAKvzL6jVa3d
但餘音尚未散去,心底已悄悄響起另一個聲音:5Please respect copyright.PENANAGI3etdcIOE
5Please respect copyright.PENANAsu1SfUSKDQ
那他呢?5Please respect copyright.PENANAkyr8l4dKxq
5Please respect copyright.PENANALQr9TT3uuN
現在的他,正在經歷人生最大的轉型期,不是嗎?5Please respect copyright.PENANAOnBeb4E9Ux
5Please respect copyright.PENANAPLT5Drtfi3
他從沒說出「留下來陪我」,但她知道,那場雪夜、那個公園裡他們無聲重逢的夜晚——所有的沉默與靠近,都是他僅存的脆弱表達。5Please respect copyright.PENANA69Vevln5ZI
5Please respect copyright.PENANAZl9HRSCbD4
冴這個人永遠不會求助——他會撐著,什麼都不說。5Please respect copyright.PENANAsmwrsXkZoT
5Please respect copyright.PENANAlUS7qXRWax
她從沒問過自己能幫上什麼忙,但她始終記得:無論有沒有人看見的日子,都是她遞過熱奶茶、把練習球傳過去的。5Please respect copyright.PENANAgUM5lZ0OR8
5Please respect copyright.PENANAmRIirrS07O
就算只是站在場邊,她也覺得,那是她的位置。5Please respect copyright.PENANAWzUsKV1fXF
5Please respect copyright.PENANAo4cCGpII51
她不是不想走上更大的舞台。5Please respect copyright.PENANAnb3Ce8mCpf
她只是害怕,一轉身,就再也找不到他了。5Please respect copyright.PENANAaQJ1QPkyeR
5Please respect copyright.PENANAudr4o1WUTC
就像下雪的那夜,如果她沒有出現在那裡,如果她沒有選擇追上去⋯⋯她連感知他的機會都沒有。5Please respect copyright.PENANAGb3f7QtKKc
5Please respect copyright.PENANApYcym6RW8g
她指尖緊緊按住手機,像這樣就能把即將被拉遠的距離留住。5Please respect copyright.PENANArvbZ9Hv6bC
5Please respect copyright.PENANA883GzvzcDt
她不是沒懷疑過,這份「想陪在他身邊」的情感,是不是一種逃避?好讓她有個名正言順的理由,不去面對外面那些莫名其妙的質疑跟嘲諷。5Please respect copyright.PENANAZd5M5koBbd
5Please respect copyright.PENANAPoVBb9cmE0
她記得自己在他身邊吱吱喳喳的模樣。記得自己不需要去展現「最好」、「最剛好」的樣子。5Please respect copyright.PENANAaezlfGbkNy
5Please respect copyright.PENANAermgpsztKq
就算他們相隔了四年的空白,但他只要在,她就不需要去那樣展現。5Please respect copyright.PENANAm64zctiqvV
5Please respect copyright.PENANAbJdrZXkoMa
越是這樣想,她就越確定——5Please respect copyright.PENANA9PVXCFrnw3
只有靠近他,只有在他身邊,她才有一種「不用收起自己」的安全感。5Please respect copyright.PENANA97eunYqj77
5Please respect copyright.PENANAPY1bSGFwaj
那不是戀愛的幻想,也不是任性的依賴——而是她最深處、最真實的判斷。5Please respect copyright.PENANA4BMJzeTv3c
5Please respect copyright.PENANAvG5JrU0yGn
在這個什麼都得拿捏分寸、不能露出破綻的行業裡⋯⋯只有那個人,可以讓她不覺得自己很糟、不怕自己很吵、不用害怕任何失敗——5Please respect copyright.PENANAgTlHXOaHlZ
5Please respect copyright.PENANAYDZRAcYht0
現在,她想用同樣的方式,站在他身邊。5Please respect copyright.PENANATkcQSqc4Qo
5Please respect copyright.PENANAXPwOG662k8
——可巴黎在那一端,機票是明天早上十點的。5Please respect copyright.PENANAOmqZedsu7E
5Please respect copyright.PENANAMLPp1JU4KO
而她,想去。5Please respect copyright.PENANAaXUyi4nype
5Please respect copyright.PENANAiAVTqA4ny0
不是不想飛,而是不確定,離開的這幾天,會不會錯過某些他需要她的時刻。5Please respect copyright.PENANAHWE99QhKmW
5Please respect copyright.PENANA0HMSzR323X
指尖在手機和email間來回滑動,心裡的鐘聲一下一下逼近。5Please respect copyright.PENANA4aV7dDzXF6
5Please respect copyright.PENANA7VponDEmGt
她明知道該出發了,卻怎麼也停不下那個念頭——5Please respect copyright.PENANACQdBD862Sv
5Please respect copyright.PENANAcVtpiLi77B
「他如果在練球時,突然狀態崩了怎麼辦?」5Please respect copyright.PENANATvERaJWBkO
「如果又出了什麼事,他會不會又一個人撐著?」5Please respect copyright.PENANA93j8y4kMBG
5Please respect copyright.PENANA5HlqJLbbyt
星野莉奈閉上眼,告訴自己這樣的情緒太過矯情。5Please respect copyright.PENANA576JWHIdaK
5Please respect copyright.PENANA9zVVx8crds
但下一秒,眼淚還是悄悄浮了上來。5Please respect copyright.PENANAFuWgP22pcl
5Please respect copyright.PENANAFl1qFy5EsQ
——她真的,好想飛去巴黎。5Please respect copyright.PENANAhdtnTRAyFP
5Please respect copyright.PENANA6xc0h02AjK
她忽然想起,當年,冴拿到RE・AL的邀請函時,會不會,也有過這樣的掙扎?5Please respect copyright.PENANATDH7X0edyt
5Please respect copyright.PENANAX1nKqost1u
他不是沒感情的——她知道。5Please respect copyright.PENANAsp5L4GG9GY
5Please respect copyright.PENANAWVdvFK2slP
在他們家慶功的那晚,他靜靜把彩帶從臉上撥下來。表情安靜得像水,沒有激動,也沒有喜悅,沒有對她跟小凜的舉動潑任何冷水——那種靜,像一種極溫柔、極深刻的道別。5Please respect copyright.PENANA9T2MfoULAz
5Please respect copyright.PENANAG6YvlDus7L
他沒說什麼英雄夢,只是靠著流理台默默坐下來,提起糸師凜,講的全是捨不得。5Please respect copyright.PENANA1SHgQoVlg9
5Please respect copyright.PENANABPEAK74V3u
而離開的前一天,他們三個人在堤防。他語氣堅定,又像輕聲叮嚀小凜——他不在的時候,不可以放棄足球。5Please respect copyright.PENANAgm8D8BCwMW
5Please respect copyright.PENANA578QG7bnoP
她想到幾年前,自己第一次在攝影棚拍廣告時的緊張——當時,糸師冴還在西班牙,她每週會主動傳照片給他,問他:「這樣拍,會不會太像在笑?我還是比較想要拍有氣勢一點的。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAqenlrUgO7v
5Please respect copyright.PENANA1EIKnHsNmt
他總是回得簡單:「很適合妳。」5Please respect copyright.PENANALFzWpSNazV
5Please respect copyright.PENANA6VHO8wlvkq
她當時以為那是敷衍,但後來才明白,那是他一貫的語言——節省語氣,連肯定也是。5Please respect copyright.PENANAb06qBzVmFH
5Please respect copyright.PENANAvbQVXjTC0T
那其實也是冴在叫她:5Please respect copyright.PENANA4TYePBztlp
5Please respect copyright.PENANAytgCCOkcJq
「不要放棄。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAkc2lz4BQZe
5Please respect copyright.PENANAzjZSBFz9TW
那時候——他是不是也像她現在一樣,走得很遠,心卻一直回頭看。5Please respect copyright.PENANAAiTYe7AByd
5Please respect copyright.PENANAFvCTBKtpfx
她用手背擦掉眼淚,吸了吸鼻子。5Please respect copyright.PENANA66WVarcBjs
猶豫了一下,還是撥了通電話給糸師冴。5Please respect copyright.PENANAPXwO78utLR
5Please respect copyright.PENANA3Mf7oHQ7fC
『喂?』電話裡傳來他熟悉而略顯低沉的聲音。5Please respect copyright.PENANAefs2Amtg5m
5Please respect copyright.PENANAtkiQb7UKME
「冴,今天訓練還順利嗎?」5Please respect copyright.PENANADe6kWUtnMv
5Please respect copyright.PENANAYdDzJsonFz
『還行。妳⋯⋯怎麼了嗎?』5Please respect copyright.PENANAjfBLFiWOx0
5Please respect copyright.PENANAynLyUfWOQ4
「嗯⋯⋯我跟你說哦,我今天收到一個還不錯的試鏡邀請。」她的語氣聽起來輕鬆又淡定,彷彿只是隨口一提:5Please respect copyright.PENANANYnZi0BUlQ
5Please respect copyright.PENANAKdYDEUfVIj
「說不定,我會去歐洲拍攝。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAZbMFShTALf
5Please respect copyright.PENANAmgyNJEMFoL
電話那頭,糸師冴沉默了一會,不知道他是在斟酌什麼,還是根本什麼都沒想:5Please respect copyright.PENANAGxfzNl1YR6
5Please respect copyright.PENANAL4VprDjVxl
『很好啊,妳早就應該去歐洲試試了。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAvZodJYRDBU
5Please respect copyright.PENANA0eykUaACvs
「是嗎?」她輕笑一聲,「我以為你會說點別的。」5Please respect copyright.PENANA2jRmS9fvaE
5Please respect copyright.PENANABN84DrrKI8
『說什麼?恭喜妳,星野莉奈同學?』5Please respect copyright.PENANAO9uzP49gY0
5Please respect copyright.PENANAqbCfGgh0k0
「真沒誠意。」她撇嘴輕哼一聲:「——明天早上的飛機耶,你不說點什麼嗎?」5Please respect copyright.PENANAWmsTIeabOM
5Please respect copyright.PENANATJjQj4s5sK
『⋯⋯趕快掛掉電話去收行李,妳的時間管理很差。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAzuxv5MFgyi
5Please respect copyright.PENANANpx7x9VUqS
「喂——誰在跟你說這個啊!」5Please respect copyright.PENANAi7siFWDhEV
5Please respect copyright.PENANA7kWEyAOsBe
話才講完,電話那頭傳來一聲輕笑——不是冷笑,而是難得、帶著一點溫度的低笑聲。5Please respect copyright.PENANAQzMJPnxBzi
5Please respect copyright.PENANAHGLMga4W4X
星野莉奈怔了一下,心跳,不小心漏了一拍。5Please respect copyright.PENANAMqqYveXFf8
5Please respect copyright.PENANApCAufwmOEu
他大概不知道——那聲笑,比任何祝福都來得溫柔。5Please respect copyright.PENANAivlWhU5owD
5Please respect copyright.PENANAnTA6bICZPe
『⋯⋯我知道妳會去。』5Please respect copyright.PENANA72lHFuxWBX
5Please respect copyright.PENANAOHSQ82xFiw
「你一開始就覺得我會去?」5Please respect copyright.PENANAZsdkyTDHVN
5Please respect copyright.PENANAOXXrNirE86
『妳從以前就是這樣啊。問別人前,自己早就有答案了——說不去,其實心裡已經在想要帶什麼了。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAWaiUC3f8wF
5Please respect copyright.PENANABUlrmnJ55D
她沉默了幾秒,然後嘴角慢慢揚起,「你真的很討厭欸。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAm7nof78Kfq
5Please respect copyright.PENANAlhKmjZbm5w
『是妳太容易被讀懂了。』5Please respect copyright.PENANA32Mv2OSH3p
5Please respect copyright.PENANAXspnUfcNy7
電話裡一時沒了聲音,但氣氛並不尷尬——那是一種熟悉的靜默,是連沉默都像在說話的節奏。5Please respect copyright.PENANAiwtnyUUEaN
5Please respect copyright.PENANAJmqUcspmeu
她終於輕輕開口:「冴。」5Please respect copyright.PENANA1ygrNrQk2G
5Please respect copyright.PENANA4DhIBg6H97
『嗯?』5Please respect copyright.PENANAfimSIhbXeB
5Please respect copyright.PENANAWeD04VLkQ0
「你不會在我離開這幾天⋯⋯又一個人亂想吧?」5Please respect copyright.PENANAbXJWmH1zdq
5Please respect copyright.PENANAZ0tSZp5mTC
他沒有馬上回答,只是過了幾秒,才低聲說:5Please respect copyright.PENANAuC1l3Ktswz
5Please respect copyright.PENANAa84wZuBkPr
『⋯⋯妳想多了。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAX3IxDqsuhy
5Please respect copyright.PENANApNB07E7QEO
「欸!我很認真耶!」5Please respect copyright.PENANAg6H97Wrh4z
5Please respect copyright.PENANA9LWZn6VbN7
『我才沒空想那麼多。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAXHdzxOFNrE
5Please respect copyright.PENANASnaKYjzbgC
星野莉奈深吸一口氣,強忍住想大笑又大罵的衝動——可最後還是忍不住,在電話裡碎念起來:5Please respect copyright.PENANA0e1if4iEiu
5Please respect copyright.PENANAoTa8RlakzJ
「我跟你講喔,冴,如果我回來的時候發現你又瘦了、手又凍傷、還一副什麼都沒事的樣子,我真的會生氣。然後我就會當著你隊友的面,直接把你從場邊拖走、狠狠罵一頓,毫不留情的那種。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAZPyajdoxoR
5Please respect copyright.PENANA23tJBOf6u9
電話那頭沉默了一秒,傳來一聲極輕的「嗯」。5Please respect copyright.PENANAwixNNK3bYb
5Please respect copyright.PENANAS2bl0zWLoq
那一聲應答,不是敷衍,不是無奈,而是一種,她從他口中很少聽見的溫柔——像是用極有限的語言說:「我會照做。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAGW0KMsFnfm
5Please respect copyright.PENANAGpllAcooVG
她靠在沙發背上,望著天花板。5Please respect copyright.PENANAkyQIZtfjo5
5Please respect copyright.PENANAHjsVymLxUO
「你還要答應我一件事。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAIOkoqINgHF
5Please respect copyright.PENANA53z7m2R7do
『說吧。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAUWEB1S8UiA
5Please respect copyright.PENANARwyOsisEDk
「這幾天你一定要吃飯、要睡覺、要訓練、要記得貼暖暖包、不要自己去踢那種很冷的夜場——還有,如果又出現那種⋯⋯腳不聽使喚的狀況,不准自己一個人悶著。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAL0yMVWAvvW
5Please respect copyright.PENANAFZdlLouJJv
她語氣本來是故作輕鬆的,可說著說著,最後竟有點哽咽。5Please respect copyright.PENANADEZkG346Bw
5Please respect copyright.PENANArhNw7MGhcz
『⋯⋯妳囉唆得跟以前一模一樣。』5Please respect copyright.PENANAnaRbJsDivk
5Please respect copyright.PENANAkJrimed3Ht
「冴,我是認真的。」5Please respect copyright.PENANA5rQyXvnZ6o
5Please respect copyright.PENANA8z10YGyOl4
『我知道。五天而已,又沒什麼。』5Please respect copyright.PENANA0JsJ9aCVhE
5Please respect copyright.PENANA81QGzmmzOA
星野莉奈大笑出聲,「也是吼——有人一去就是四年,我才五天而已,Piece of cake啦!」5Please respect copyright.PENANAmGxyPD108G
5Please respect copyright.PENANATwD6FVOJyN
『囉哩八唆的⋯⋯妳還收不收行李?』5Please respect copyright.PENANApWVw5qXYuj
5Please respect copyright.PENANAoYkrLNuwew
「收啦收啦。不過你要記得喔——如果你覺得心裡有點酸酸的、有點痛痛的,或是耳邊有聽見我的聲音了,就聯絡我,好嗎?」5Please respect copyright.PENANAPw9j5EifNS
5Please respect copyright.PENANAiGAW6t9Keq
『⋯⋯我會先去看醫生。』5Please respect copyright.PENANArEWSwJTvKv
5Please respect copyright.PENANA8BdeNloJOG
她笑了,笑得安靜又柔軟。5Please respect copyright.PENANAbhk51fFFYE
5Please respect copyright.PENANAZ9RXegK3OY
「——我會記得傳訊息給你,記得拍照片給你看,也會記得回來。」5Please respect copyright.PENANAizdqKoWaKF
5Please respect copyright.PENANAc3209Z49gP
巴黎很遠,機票時間不會等人。5Please respect copyright.PENANAzEk7QUtdpB
5Please respect copyright.PENANAuEH5asgmYb
她終於打開email,按下確認。手機放在一邊,開始收拾行李。5Please respect copyright.PENANAavy5KmYCNA
5Please respect copyright.PENANA4kdokCI8pP
「我回來一定會找你。」5Please respect copyright.PENANA0ducSSwcKH
5Please respect copyright.PENANAZWLe2UsESc
只要他還在,站在鏡頭前的那個「星野莉奈Rina」,就能再走得更遠一點。
5Please respect copyright.PENANAw7miPd9VMX