THE FOOL. - Hope Was All I Had

There are things… and there are people.

Some I know.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIXAyWfwuX
Some I love.

And somehow, the ones I love… they never stay.

I never asked for much.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZlLYatzvT
Not love. Not promises.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnj2HHDz92J
Just her presence.

But saying goodbye—typing it even—is far easier than living with it.

Because I cared. Deeply.

And now, I don’t know how to remember life before her.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9iMgpg5XRv
Before the shared evenings, the bus stops, the laughter, the silences.

Still, I knew I had to let go.

Not for me.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3TKWiSjNBY
For her.

Because if me walking away gives her peace, then I’ll walk.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfC56MeGXL7
Even if it means leaving behind the part of myself I found in her.

But I didn’t want it to end quietly.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH32Azi0qyz
I wanted it to hurt, to leave a mark—because that’s what she meant.

And so, I became the villain in my own story.

I decided: if she needs a reason to forget me, I’ll give her one.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YJlJzVW0O
A clean break. A wound that heals with time, not confusion.

So I dug out what I buried long ago—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5QNuTlie0
The confession.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSMHxEbbHA
The one I promised I’d never say.

I poured everything into a message—everything I was, everything we were, and everything I wanted her to be.

And one night, between externals, I confessed.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWk2Bq2vtj6
Over WhatsApp.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnfqbyZZ5Ir
No buildup. Just heart.

I told her the truth she never asked for.

And I knew the answer.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcLrf7j1q55
Of course I did.

It would be a no—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOLAksGUzm
In the present,33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡps3OPRHcae
In the past,33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRslbJjeUDs
And in any faraway future I could imagine.

But she replied:

“I need some time.”

And I said I would wait.

Not because I believed the answer would change—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjjQvq2DAps
But because that’s what confessions are for.

To end things the way they should’ve never begun.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfo5rvAy5y

She asked that if I knew what her answer would be.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAWTT73ckL
I replied 49/51.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiBf3KRAZN5
Knowing damn well that it was 100% a No.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGtxUBF9oQ
33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxj3ZTx1a1y
but something deep inside replied with a 49% a Yes.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Mn2Kd4HDR
even it couldn't say Yes a 50%.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa0QIWZ6cYi
cause It and I knew from a long time.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIK7tYVRFqn
33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfCVwHquQt
The externals started.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qO2LC4aHZ
The rush came back flying.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAr6vp5piq
33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7PRTuebT1
While I was in a war with thoughts.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9g1x8OAwt
And as the days went on.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFUAGrbmvmj
33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVZ0grpquX

One random night, while I waited in silence,33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIuKmRIxNS
The universe had one more tragedy to give.

Outside my home, I sat alone under the sky—my mind a war zone of logic and hope.

My mother stepped out for a walk, along with Potti—my dog, my companion—and her one and only pup.

The pup didn’t even have a name yet.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVLJ61yZ4tB
I was waiting for Seren to name her.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPgrIVdunW6
But life didn’t wait for names.

Suddenly, a pack of street dogs came rushing.

They attacked—vicious, fast, merciless.

Without thinking, I ran to them—bare hands, bare heart.

I tried.

God, I tried.

Screaming, pushing, shielding Potti and the pup.

But it wasn’t enough.

They bit me, tore into my arms and legs,33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4gdNeAB9P
while I wrapped myself around the ones I loved.

Six dogs.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd7OkSKiSqS
No help.

Until my father and neighbors came rushing.

But by then—

It was too late.

In my arms, Potti lay still—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTXZnAyLG5v
Her fur stained with blood, her neck torn.

The pup, her tiny body broken, missing a leg,33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAnKvyZdwmS
barely breathing.

We rushed them to the nearest hospital.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeU2ryTSJH
Tears finally came after years of holding them back.

But hope was all I carried.

And hope was not enough.

They couldn’t save them.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTusxwQb33a
No one could.

And I was left—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJm1qMWjyjB
Bloody.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARPxrT4NZ3
Bitten.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdla2BNqrtq
Alone.

A boy with too many wounds—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkJCRwetib
Some you could see.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMogdV7zHFF
Most you couldn’t.

I didn’t know what to do.

So, that night, I messaged her.

“Hey, are you awake?”

There was silence in my house.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDObeKBZtud
And an even louder one inside me.

I had an exam the next morning.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcY16cPLXeX
An external.

But nothing felt more urgent than that question I couldn’t stop asking:

What matters more—33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAxoEAzCiz2
The present or the future?

Until that night, I never even thought about it.

But that night… I got my answer.

Both matter.

And yet, when forced to choose, we weigh them.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRIw0AVkK4
We try to balance what we feel and what we know.

The heart says stay.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwd9arIgiGI
The mind says go.

One believes.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡADAwXZIZZD
One doubts.

One clings.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUb8UmdOvFv
One lets go.

And so I waited for her reply.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIjtt56kQb
But it didn’t come.

Morning came instead.

Same bus.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKykUofw91
Same college.

But I wasn't the same.

I wore a mask—like always.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PzzsgtynW
Attended the exam.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6DvWYdssX4
Laughed with friends.33Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6KA5zyAEaL
Pretended.

Because that’s what Rudeus is for.

But who could’ve guessed?

That in the evening—

After everything had burned down—

The answer to my confession would finally arrive.

ns216.73.217.1da2