THE FOOL. - Hope Was All I Had

There are things… and there are people.

Some I know.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEdhbpF9zv
Some I love.

And somehow, the ones I love… they never stay.

I never asked for much.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkOVIdm2yDk
Not love. Not promises.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRdyEHPgWS
Just her presence.

But saying goodbye—typing it even—is far easier than living with it.

Because I cared. Deeply.

And now, I don’t know how to remember life before her.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1LJgOCahNO
Before the shared evenings, the bus stops, the laughter, the silences.

Still, I knew I had to let go.

Not for me.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEGs5gcRTW
For her.

Because if me walking away gives her peace, then I’ll walk.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRaVWeAAX5
Even if it means leaving behind the part of myself I found in her.

But I didn’t want it to end quietly.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Quv0VbnXZ
I wanted it to hurt, to leave a mark—because that’s what she meant.

And so, I became the villain in my own story.

I decided: if she needs a reason to forget me, I’ll give her one.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwSO8E3Vnx
A clean break. A wound that heals with time, not confusion.

So I dug out what I buried long ago—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNT7wgzZa8a
The confession.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNy2B7gswka
The one I promised I’d never say.

I poured everything into a message—everything I was, everything we were, and everything I wanted her to be.

And one night, between externals, I confessed.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOtRnHiZ0XH
Over WhatsApp.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SPQZYUQEV
No buildup. Just heart.

I told her the truth she never asked for.

And I knew the answer.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgb1T75JmV
Of course I did.

It would be a no—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYUaWqFp1uB
In the present,293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpgbcIw5AW
In the past,293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KhFYvnoP8
And in any faraway future I could imagine.

But she replied:

“I need some time.”

And I said I would wait.

Not because I believed the answer would change—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpti7j9Pfnt
But because that’s what confessions are for.

To end things the way they should’ve never begun.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKEH2NdVwRI

She asked that if I knew what her answer would be.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRayhAiPvY
I replied 49/51.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGbXKXrbfe
Knowing damn well that it was 100% a No.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRME4Hdnf6n
293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG99e9DmUDQ
but something deep inside replied with a 49% a Yes.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUMGgUtJYJ
even it couldn't say Yes a 50%.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBV3OBS3YQT
cause It and I knew from a long time.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkflF8TN8wF
293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl2GxRUBrzV
The externals started.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ13IVqloEmW
The rush came back flying.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFhyQkA55A8
293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9ByWUG1xE
While I was in a war with thoughts.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcCddDEDgW2
And as the days went on.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51T8913eDN
293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGqXBBE9NO

One random night, while I waited in silence,293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSkbM6cljtm
The universe had one more tragedy to give.

Outside my home, I sat alone under the sky—my mind a war zone of logic and hope.

My mother stepped out for a walk, along with Potti—my dog, my companion—and her one and only pup.

The pup didn’t even have a name yet.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMX7TteWSoz
I was waiting for Seren to name her.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTlaoq00yKL
But life didn’t wait for names.

Suddenly, a pack of street dogs came rushing.

They attacked—vicious, fast, merciless.

Without thinking, I ran to them—bare hands, bare heart.

I tried.

God, I tried.

Screaming, pushing, shielding Potti and the pup.

But it wasn’t enough.

They bit me, tore into my arms and legs,293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkxjuBg0V7
while I wrapped myself around the ones I loved.

Six dogs.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3DYZvPfOR
No help.

Until my father and neighbors came rushing.

But by then—

It was too late.

In my arms, Potti lay still—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhw33BeCa3x
Her fur stained with blood, her neck torn.

The pup, her tiny body broken, missing a leg,293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPOLKeQDn1C
barely breathing.

We rushed them to the nearest hospital.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpfDnLOl6YI
Tears finally came after years of holding them back.

But hope was all I carried.

And hope was not enough.

They couldn’t save them.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3RvPj6tV5
No one could.

And I was left—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK968ekalEQ
Bloody.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqREEnh2Hq
Bitten.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO1dZtQHP2Q
Alone.

A boy with too many wounds—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6U1TXCgPv
Some you could see.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWiiGsWsVj
Most you couldn’t.

I didn’t know what to do.

So, that night, I messaged her.

“Hey, are you awake?”

There was silence in my house.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaN3VQTl0Kn
And an even louder one inside me.

I had an exam the next morning.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vzdhwKGvg
An external.

But nothing felt more urgent than that question I couldn’t stop asking:

What matters more—293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFgxf9G2cZ
The present or the future?

Until that night, I never even thought about it.

But that night… I got my answer.

Both matter.

And yet, when forced to choose, we weigh them.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzkT6X8WPN
We try to balance what we feel and what we know.

The heart says stay.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRx2FTfkoJ
The mind says go.

One believes.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUV8VmnxgbF
One doubts.

One clings.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQVPh8xAD13
One lets go.

And so I waited for her reply.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJw4ECz76d
But it didn’t come.

Morning came instead.

Same bus.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XUNggeOTa
Same college.

But I wasn't the same.

I wore a mask—like always.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvrglGiOdb
Attended the exam.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy61GjzN8dK
Laughed with friends.293Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡffb4DlsM8n
Pretended.

Because that’s what Rudeus is for.

But who could’ve guessed?

That in the evening—

After everything had burned down—

The answer to my confession would finally arrive.

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