「我無你咁大愛。」我與阿爸恩怨情仇，非一時三刻種下，亦非阿媽三言兩語能解決。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DwzTjy8HP
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這根刺，一旦種下，就無法拔除。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXD0lOlVIJ3
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IBOaMs3Xo
 阿媽長歎一聲，緩緩開口：「佢咁大個人，都應該學識自己面對。」出乎意料地，她居然放棄遊說，放任不管。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgqs258WC1
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2JFoRT66vo
 「你唔係要我幫咩？」我不解。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BehqFKAkA
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3kudTvLRR
 「你唔想幫，我迫你都無用。其實你兩個一樣咁固執，決定咗嘅事，邊個講都無用。」115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxjwBkIttJ
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2F9Hncf3N
 「只不過⋯⋯」話未說完，她戛然站起身，引領我走出房間，突兀轉話題：「宗仔你肚唔肚餓？」 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFRo0B4i4Z
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGvtDFGoxuA
「唔肚餓 ⋯⋯你要走？」本想追問幫助阿爸方法，可阿媽突如其來提問，讓我再次意識到，自己將承受多次離別痛苦。霎時間，不捨情感湧上心頭。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjNoto5PIL
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxa3gAb9tCb
「我想試吓個飯咩味。」 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmAmkYXZ7s9
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCxkNO2lCC
「我幫你整翻熱。」見她未有拒絕，我便動身走出房間。剛才只顧相認，幾乎忘記有雞飯及豬頸肉作早餐。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAvXg2dQR7
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYa5EL1gxi
 阿媽則跟隨我身後，雙手插腰說：「呢度咁污糟，一睇就知你哋求其掃兩下就算，啲角落頭鋪曬塵，睇到好唔順眼，想走都唔得。」115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6g9q0DLTo
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl8SOWwzfl2
 聽罷，我不禁尷尬一笑，每次打掃清潔，均待到無法忍受，才敷衍掃幾下，只求眼不見為淨，可以走路通過就夠。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnVebjwt6QQ
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrhQ1UCAPfH
這些生活習慣，她竟一眼看出。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKGWfLeGIl
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCALqprtSB
「我幫你手？」我心虛問。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL8TyZgi1FQ
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbO2CoGSrdp
 「欸洗乜啊，你幫手諗定今晚食咩就得。」阿媽賣力打掃着。儘管身軀為阿爸，身體語言依然沒法騙人。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqxEg8JxT5
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3rRt0UgnSZ
「今晚？」115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFg3HdTfE21
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyMF4T6CaEN
 「我可以煮埋晚飯先走。」她背對着我，那背景顯得份外蒼老，「之後就無得再翻嚟。」 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3oIdNMbQQ
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO71X21zcoR
「之後，你要去邊？」剛才只顧沉醉過去，卻未有了解阿媽這兩年去向。我好奇，所謂投胎轉世，又是否真實存在？115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwIEjYqBog
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtvKm5vkm5
 「去翻屬於我嘅地方。」她說得隱晦，「你呢兩年⋯⋯過得開唔開心？」我問。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5PUjYSnfa8
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdVKXjfPT1Q
 阿媽轉身望向我，淺笑着：「唔洗再訓喺床，可以去邊就去邊，緊係開心。」自患癌後，她甚少露出笑容，就算嘴角勾起一抹微笑，也只不過苦中作樂。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUzrSyG4YW8
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppgp5hnpMu
 如今，她的笑容，確實由心而發，笑得輕鬆自在。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90nP5twKJk
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7aYJxRgmO9
「咁就好。」我放下心頭大石，慶幸阿媽過得安好，無需承受痛苦。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9P5tq03P8e
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx6IpRVe3yq
「咁宗仔你呢？」此話一出，如同靈魂拷問般，思緒開始遊走，閃現各時期生活碎片。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡORXlbEpopg
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6SSk5pajW
大學時段，與朋友通宵玩樂，笑得合不攏嘴，生活無憂無慮。鏡頭一轉，定格於上班時間，克制地閉上嘴，忍受上司及客戶無理取鬧，苦等時間流逝。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9cYezavRW
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7yRbptFkzM
戛然，畫風突變，來到深夜時分，一個人哭得死去活來，沉醉昔日美好、懊悔自己過失，卻享受獨處、絕無僅有的熱水浴時間。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7k6SqWeRBm
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGJXBPHhH5J
「都Ok。」我滿口塞滿雞飯，口齒不清回應着。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwe3JBCHNDW
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41M9qEVfuF
 不知從何開始，我習慣以「Ok」回應對方。 OK一詞，看似中性，易於接受。實際耐人尋味，間乎好壞之間，要對方猜測，卻又站於不敗之地，沒得失任何人。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnFLsihqWGn
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNshyUBNjQ
有些真相，無須執着，模糊帶過，皆大歡喜。115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGRZlpgNDI
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHTMWq53gIA
 「每次你哋諗起我，其實我都會知。」 阿媽緩緩站起來，悠閒伸着懶腰，再一下子攤坐椅上，以懶散語氣說：「宗仔，今日就咩都唔好諗，開開心心咁過，OK？」115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuoH6vvDn9D
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65l3klhFLC
 「唔Ok都要OK。」她半命令補充道，我一如既往，卻由衷回應：「OK。」 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvhc9PSefi
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxzRpJlqvg
「唔？個飯幾好食，係啲米濕咗啲，但真係阿媽煮開隻味。」阿媽評論着，表現得像是第一次品嘗般，「豬頸肉幾脆，難得無煮燶。」她繼續喃喃自語。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmYNiSLrOU
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX8ETylF8Um
「你頭先無試味？」 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwfjCeMNMBy
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZXGl7gNFzp
「欸頭先掛住講嘢，邊有時間。」 我似懂非懂點頭，邊吃飯邊閒話家常。彼此下意識地避開沉重話題，盡力把握每分每秒，記住每一相處時刻。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGm89EGfS6B
115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8D97au1GP
「蒸水蛋、薯仔炆雞翼、炒菜心，紅蘿蔔粟米湯。」幾番掙扎，我終於揀好今晚菜式。即使到餐廳酒樓，仍無阿媽所煮的味道，總覺得缺乏甚麼。 115Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNoyxJb9Y1Z
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