【冰漾】我的單身日記 第十九章57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXie2i85FQc
發文時間: 4/23 2012

我的單身日記1957Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfTasnYm9u
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　　為什麼。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5o7xGh57up
　　為什麼說不出口。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHoIgmON6O8
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpG63uQ9dQr
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　　這麼簡單的一句話，就四個字。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqf2GnHkwDZ
　　雙唇開了又闔，我放棄了多少次坦白的機會，而每每壓抑一次，換來的都是無法訴諸的淚水。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIp6CY3kN7H
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF0IgpZEQcI
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7tktxWHCpP
　　啊啊……你不知道的，淚水。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYDIUtNGjm
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDLndTxCrdw
　　有多少個夜裡，我回味著你稀有的溫柔，在心裡感到甜蜜而勾動嘴角的那一刻，比笑聲更快流洩的卻是淚水。那些夜裡，我總是笑著哭。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuPowbDGl4P
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCE0dhdA6SA
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjJ3NV9bdL
　　為了你笑，更為了你哭。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ287H7vgEpx
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV54Pa9WzLj
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3zTwO8aVx
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2iVE2MjxXS
　　要我怎麼說出口？被我喜歡上又不是你的錯，而我憑什麼讓這份心情成為你的負擔？57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OA6L1Z5UQ
　　但我好幾次都差點這麼說出來了，真的差一點。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVrbrfaZxk
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo5g4L4RAKL
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE7zbVqiNDg
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhkPk2zEyK
　　當你走在我面前，嘴角帶著若有似無的笑意時；當我遇上挫折，你走過來拍了拍我的肩膀時；當我迷失了方向，你默默的將我拉起來推回原軌時。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp5vCKog9be
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcQamIWfNS
　　我張著的唇，嚥著的是多少句喜歡，你永遠也不會知道。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwkKKxA2Qmn
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YZ72lzTm4
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7x1G6uC8nZ
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpeYWqCXvLb
　　我想要一輩子都在你身邊，你依然不會知道的，我就是這麼貪心。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2AIZbvcJF
　　所以我情願做你的朋友，因為朋友總能比戀人長久。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0Newj9gxY
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPzgip2xkl
　　正因為我珍惜著，所以我忍受著。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡquWEfH1FfE
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUib4S2LZtB
　　這就是貪心的代價，我對你有多貪心，就要為了你多傷心。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TlJpKoukE
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedaSJXlCb8
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb6TSGe0C2W
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　　這也是沒辦法的啊，誰叫我是個失去不起的膽小鬼？57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95dHqaUKgu
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgj7C28JYPu
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDuuMoNZJF
　　我不想，失去你偶爾輕輕喚我一聲「褚。」的那抹淺笑。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡox1jsgaR7s
　　我不想，失去在你面前叫著你一聲「學長！」的資格。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryLVvxgPha
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　　就算，我真正想對你說的是，一句輕聲的：「我喜歡你。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexdqHBHDb7
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　　清醒，但沒有睜開眼睛，只是任由淚水流下，疲於掩飾早已傷痕累累的那顆心。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhoeBQQZpz4
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynNaRkQj9f
　　在認知到身旁的那人是誰時，我真的覺得－－好累好累了。閉著眼，我試著在黑暗中將那兩個截然不同的身影重疊。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEipm4tejN
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmYVF0ssBh
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3N861D9k6O
　　「學長……」我出聲，細細輕喚。聽見他來到我身邊的聲音，我勾起一抹淡然的微笑，然後睜開眼睛。映入眼中的面容，果然是他。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8dbKwffpnZ
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBXsKDo2HrU
　　「阿利學長。」我微笑著對眼前的人喚道，看著蓄有褐色長髮的俊逸青年對著我綻出一抹爽朗而溫潤的笑容：「你終於醒啦？感覺還好嗎，小學弟？」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHo69zr6GG6
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5IGTccjQF
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgwhyosJMQ3
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCoJ224ohk
　　依然微笑著，我張開雙唇：「阿利學長，我喜歡你。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCzWTJYmkRY
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFLYk2eTZZd
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3s1sVQXj4
　　已經不想去在乎了，雖然過去老是對自己說痛苦是必然的，但真的……撐不下去了啊，在他毫不遲疑的把我的心推向別人的那一刻。連自己可能被我喜歡上的可能性都歸為零，我有什麼資格去喜歡這樣的他呢？57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo63wEZLmyw
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdwh1wplOae
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEqLF4EOAOl
　　「…咦嗚呃啊？！」阿利學長顯然被我嚇的不輕。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQVvkBwS2F7
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡouYrFPbZls
　　看著這樣的他，我忍不住的笑出聲來：「我真的喜歡你唷。應該啦、嘻嘻。」我笑得好燦爛，但心裡卻哭的好大聲，好像永遠的放棄了什麼，甚至沒有勇氣去追尋。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJfAY6Q5e6q
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNZ1WCgRW7W
　　現下只有一個念頭，就是不能讓學長再去深思日記裡的內容，絕對不能讓他知道我真正喜歡的到底是誰。那麼，將錯就錯吧，喜歡一個人如果這麼痛苦，那我寧可將這份心意就此塵封，不再心動。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGbkGAONQH
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMo6dgM0SNh
　　「學、學弟，你到底怎麼了啊？」阿利學長瞪大眸子，他的驚疑不定和手足無措完全掩飾不了。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfVLvbPzk7i
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5MHjnSsWt
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGhOsdAsYC
　　笑著凝視慌張的阿利學長，我笑著笑著，就這樣哭了起來。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQxjyPTnqMz
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMpiawiIhx6
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmjt6BQ8dw
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2fWh6o2xzH
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenEAM6fk8T
　　「我喜歡你，我喜歡你，我喜歡你！嗚啊啊啊啊啊－－！我真的真的好喜歡你啊！學長……學長……我喜歡你……好喜歡好喜歡好喜歡……你不要推開我好不好？可不可以相信我？拜託你相信我……我喜歡你…真的好喜歡你啊……！」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTS5ZyZBp7S
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57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXIafMnE910
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE4tsV54daX
　　聲嘶力竭的哭喊著，我放任自己哭泣。早該大哭一場了，是我太看得起自己，以為不管多痛苦我都忍的下去。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKUGKNzPzV
　　殊不知，我早已傷不起。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9JW2jWH5r8
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57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0ZAMijLMC
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiO4mpstZmc
　　和他相處的畫面在腦中一幕幕的播放起，有他鮮有的笑意，有他偶然的親暱，有他刻意掩藏的貼心。我在他心中，就真的只是一個學弟而已，他甚至覺得我不可能會喜歡他。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ajj69949G
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOiBxIsvEg
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡloaaqpiOwM
　　還有什麼，比自己的心意還沒說出口，就被全盤否定更痛苦的呢？57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOHlYYKN5p
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ85x0GnHHgz
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuH31cheskA
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyg8DL3Uyri
　　在阿利學長身邊徹底崩潰的哭泣著，像是要把對學長的心意就這樣全部宣洩出來，我一遍又一遍的重覆哭喊著那四個字，彌補過去說不出口的每一次。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAU8VDYgPSg
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZif2l362F
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBbQeg9mBuW
　　「我喜歡你……我喜歡你……」聲音啞了，眼睛腫了，心也碎了。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwyAxYMiJjF
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2PEglcqu0p
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYEYWD160r
　　我依然開合著乾澀的雙唇重覆低喃，像是跳針的撥放器。直到我被拉起，落入一個溫暖的懷抱，直到有一隻手輕輕的覆上我泛著淚的雙眼，直到他的下巴微微的抵在我的頭頂上，我才放棄似的抓住繞在我的腰上的那隻手，像是在浩瀚無際的汪洋中飄浮了好久而終於抓住一片浮木。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80w3WOr23f
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　　「阿利學長……你可不可以替我保守一個秘密？」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHhX4AZGBB
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHNiZ87xbu
　　「嘛、我都替我保守紅袍身分的秘密了，你說，我還有什麼秘密不能替親愛的小學弟保守呢？」　57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSKvJEa5yO
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj65Uz0zcYA
　　「我…我喜歡學長，我是說冰炎學長。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYtPOITsuZ
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　　「嗯。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGyFd4AClTS
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　　「可是他以為我喜歡你。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmnNWof6SXr
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　　「……嗚啊。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQFLKzOiGH
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　　「所以我喜歡你了。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5thI5CZDC
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJSd4VZDUe
　　「……等等，學弟麻煩你把整件事情從頭到尾解釋一次給我聽。」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUWZC8vY4l
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57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbMQlXvq7T
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMm491dC0C0
　　我就這樣，在阿利學長的懷中，靜靜的說著我不為人知的愛情故事。最後，大概是哭累了，我在半睡半醒之際，感覺到自己被悄悄的扶回床上，勉強的將眼睛睜開一些，我看見正彎著腰為我蓋上棉被的阿利學長。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUYETkXwtd
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57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9f9EhI6cwb
　　忍不住伸手碰了碰他垂下的褐色馬尾，我含糊的出了聲：「阿利學長……謝謝你喔……」57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsDv7YwPFVw
57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPlMzgtdyn
　　他愣了一下，旋即燦然的綻出一抹寵溺的笑容。57Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrS5X7B1MJn
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　　「You're welcome, 親愛的學弟。」他笑著說，接著伸手，替我闔上那雙哭累的雙眼。