White sheets stained red in a hotel bed81Please respect copyright.PENANApnWEkXPrlX
Skin, ice cold, lying on the bathroom floor alone81Please respect copyright.PENANArnZQp7UCul
Brains blown out in the shed, stone cold, dead
The basement where I cut off my breathing81Please respect copyright.PENANAqGZSvjfeAF
My bedroom where I died while I'm sleeping81Please respect copyright.PENANA2cIRc4anao
Empty pill bottles scattered around my room 81Please respect copyright.PENANAE4RQhjeHDU
Maybe a noose, don't make it loose 81Please respect copyright.PENANAJqk7QmiImt
Maybe even a death I didn't choose
I'm stuck with these thoughts in my head81Please respect copyright.PENANA1LYiFOEP8S
Vivid visions invading my rest 81Please respect copyright.PENANAEMCnUTJC8z
I can't sleep because all I see is death81Please respect copyright.PENANA5PtOhapHet
I can't stay alive because I'm stuck in my head
I'm digging myself an early grave 81Please respect copyright.PENANAPI1WntFLwR
Thinking about death at such an early age81Please respect copyright.PENANAflHSkYIk3x
Part of me strives for the moment when the earth lies above my head 81Please respect copyright.PENANASUaxYuBHr4
The moment I'm dead is the day I'll rest81Please respect copyright.PENANArm3uJyGAi7
No more fighting an uphill battle that never seems to end 81Please respect copyright.PENANAjz1NxvvZPV
But another part of me doesn't want to let go, doesn't want this to end81Please respect copyright.PENANACypZcMytmD
I want to fight to stay alive, I want to fight to "live, laugh, love" again81Please respect copyright.PENANAuxYnfLq3FT
As corny as that is
I've tried so hard to stay alive, to stop crying81Please respect copyright.PENANAwzbY5uB05S
To cut off the memories that I live out in daily reveries81Please respect copyright.PENANAxTO5R3iNCB
The dread that they dismiss as being "all in my head"81Please respect copyright.PENANArm2vbqOskp
I'm honestly tired of trying to be heard, to be lead in the right direction 81Please respect copyright.PENANAuZbQ3Gbii0
Because, so far, it's all dead-ends and "mental health awareness" trends81Please respect copyright.PENANAXXLlzhqQB2
Nobody actually cares until you're dead81Please respect copyright.PENANAajAFUogo3h
Until you're another headline in the news81Please respect copyright.PENANA3e872VSPUM
All the attention directed on you, and your grieving family who never even knew 81Please respect copyright.PENANABoMGUsmnWW
Because they never tried to listen to you
Now they post on your page, they age and you stay the same 81Please respect copyright.PENANA2NE7YxlTxZ
"I miss you today" 81Please respect copyright.PENANAKxklEXFCLx
But they couldn't seem to feel that way when you were around81Please respect copyright.PENANAgik6vj8IQh
But they care now, 81Please respect copyright.PENANAlPqCYsd5VY
Now that your life met an abrupt end
And my "friends", 81Please respect copyright.PENANAtRooUgbD9n
Mixed signals is all they send81Please respect copyright.PENANAIPk02GGO0i
One day I matter to them 81Please respect copyright.PENANAxSEmT60IUX
And the next I'm condemned
A few months ago, I was fine81Please respect copyright.PENANAXyMBlN9pt3
A few months ago, I felt like flying 81Please respect copyright.PENANAuBq1z9VllF
A few months ago, I truly felt alive81Please respect copyright.PENANA0AbsGZni3x
And a few months ago, nothing hurt...
But now, everything hurts 81Please respect copyright.PENANA3aJo08RDB0
It's hard to explain with words,81Please respect copyright.PENANAE9Prs5LrqT
How the silence kills 81Please respect copyright.PENANAhikTQuF2gD
How the pain I'm in rips me to shreds 81Please respect copyright.PENANAHEXLescl0O
How my mind's convinced me that I'm better off dead
It's impossible to count on both hands, 81Please respect copyright.PENANA3EHWnvGG4I
How many people I've cut off or let go of because I convinced myself that they deserved better 81Please respect copyright.PENANATi8rpJFtWk
And look at them now, better off without me anyhow81Please respect copyright.PENANA5pfc1EdghT
I guess I didn't matter as much as they tried to make me believe 81Please respect copyright.PENANAOWZNm7DuBd
But even their "reassurance" were pretty little lies that they weaved like tapestries 81Please respect copyright.PENANAO2KxhbUWoO
The grief from all the casualties of all of my fantasies, my wildest dreams
There's a theme within all of it81Please respect copyright.PENANAhdXgxjyAnm
The little voice in my head, it screams it81Please respect copyright.PENANA87f6aQd2bU
"This was their choice"81Please respect copyright.PENANApcYlFxCHmM
And to be lonely all the time is mine81Please respect copyright.PENANATHMhGxTUhM
All of my feelings are voiced, published publicly81Please respect copyright.PENANAVci6WkOmRh
But they're overlooked, dismissed as fiction, a phase, lucky me...
So now my eyes, once open windows into my mind, close their curtains81Please respect copyright.PENANAaaa1TOYeCA
The words on all of the pages of my open book erase as the pages are burned81Please respect copyright.PENANAo6EhfrlMA5
This is exactly what I deserve, everything I've earned after the bridges I've burned 81Please respect copyright.PENANAl2SYODh3DY
It was never on purpose, never my intention, but I never had your attention from the start
All my wishes, sent to the stars, missed them all 81Please respect copyright.PENANAbOHSi6FpRd
Their light flickered and died as I spent nights in my room crying81Please respect copyright.PENANApPFDQwBl0y
I wish somebody would call81Please respect copyright.PENANAoMDCNGGwq7
But there's no denying that there's no point in trying
So I pour it out in my writing, daily and nightly 81Please respect copyright.PENANABCkmAl3Eqb
But when I post these on the internet, I feel like I'm oversharing 81Please respect copyright.PENANApo71nrrQYd
And when I vent to my friends, even though they reassure me that it's fine, I feel like a burden81Please respect copyright.PENANAeDaegekBek
A buzzkill, a thrill-killer 81Please respect copyright.PENANAtM1UzBpvXK
So I lie, saying that I'm fine 81Please respect copyright.PENANApJRSEbjap1
So that nobody asks questions, and nobody cries 81Please respect copyright.PENANAQHgRT4NBlm
I wanted to feel heard but nobody cared enough, nobody tried