I look at her as she’s studying. She looks so serious. I wouldn’t imagine how hard it would be to risk our friendship for the prospect of us. Maybe it’s not worth it. Or it is. I don’t know.
Later, I’m in my dorm, and I talk with Ryan. He’s my roommate. Also my best friend. And, he's gay like me. Anyway, I’m talking with him about how I feel.
“You should just go for it, girl. Or, go slow. Give her signals that you’re open,” he says.
“It’s not that easy. She’s a woman! Even if we did work, what would everyone think? A woman dating a woman?”, I yell.
“Calm down. It’s the same as dating a man for me, okay? You just don’t care what anyone thinks,” he says. He doesn’t understand. It’s really about my family. They would probably disown me if I came out.
“Okay. I’m gonna go to sleep, Ryan,” I say and sigh.
I wake up to birds chirping so loud, I have to block my ears with my hands. I come into the living room and make a cup of coffee. Somebody knocks on the door. I open it to see Layla. Oh. My. Gosh. I’m literally in my pajamas. How am I supposed to signal her?
“Come in,” I say. She walks in and turns around to smile at me. Ryan pokes his head out of his room. Then, he raises his eyebrows and gives me a smirk. I signal him to get back in. “What’s up?”, I say.
“Do you want to go to class together?”, Layla asks. We are in college together, so we walk to class together sometimes. And we know where each other’s dorms are.
I get ready to go to class as Layla waits outside my room.
We walk to class. As we’re walking, I bump into her, and we both laugh. So much for signaling.
I’m pretty much done with all of my classes for the day, but I still have homework. Instead, I think about Layla and the possibility of us happening. Should I tell her?, I think.
I don't think signaling will do much. Her love language is typically talking, not touching.
I go to sleep, thinking about whether or not she likes me. I mean, we've been friends for a long time, so she might consider me as a sister. I mean, it's worth a try, though.
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