轟——！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7u7WfYnJUC
（天地間一聲巨響，出現一朵巨大的蘑菇雲。）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmAAtjv0r1
（天庭）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv2jWMgn70E
（靈霄殿）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvuEzm2TV3
（玉帝正趴在桌子上睡覺）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8PpIi3Muef
傳令官：報——！！！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32c5zYqJ1u
（玉帝一驚，伸著懶腰醒來）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZm3LLctkE
玉帝：什麽事啊？這麽大聲？又打擾我睡覺。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxiMXW936mL
傳令官：千裏眼、順風耳在殿外求見。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyb6Lbhm5on
玉帝：傳。（趴在桌上繼續睡覺）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8UK5V9c3hu
（千裏眼和順風耳興致勃勃的走上殿來）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHF0o9ewqG
千裏眼：陛下，我們耗時千年研製的元子神彈，今日在下界爆裂成功啦！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ38ELl5uID
玉帝（猛地醒來）：哦！真的？耶！耶！（狂喜）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPdggIpIoWf
順風耳：元子神彈爆裂的聲音太巨大了，竟震壞我兩個耳膜。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJovtH5HlA
玉帝：你不是有九九八十一個耳膜嗎？震壞兩個算什麽？別大驚小怪的。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkrAeKatps4
千裏眼：元子神彈爆裂時發出強烈刺眼的光線……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjRvUbMKlF
玉帝：啊！你的眼睛沒受傷害吧？你只有兩只眼睛。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvxiSPrv7UJ
千裏眼：哈哈！沒，沒。我戴墨鏡看的。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzU9aX3siMU
玉帝：算你小子聰明！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3LHVuaqHco
千裏眼：元子神彈爆裂後生成直沖天庭像蘑菇一般巨大的雲煙，壯觀無比！我從來沒看到過那麽美麗的景色。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDiOkFlTjr
順風耳：元子神彈爆裂的余音不斷，聽得我心曠神怡。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlO8rJoFcHb
玉帝：哦？這麽壯觀的場景怎麽不早先告我？！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTOJghmteV
千裏眼：陛下，你忘了我的眼睛有錄製功能。我已經把神彈爆裂實況全部錄製下來，你想看隨時就可以看。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOqajz5UwPr
玉帝：真有你小子的！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgNZ1Wc1Hc
順風耳：可惜我的耳朵沒錄製功能，沒錄下元子神彈的爆裂聲音。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpvs70X6HU
玉帝：唉！沒關系，就當看無聲電影吧。小順子，下去把你的耳朵改造改造。你不知道聲音也在滅絕嗎？隨時隨地錄製聲音，很具有生物學價值。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOqdMer7MRo
順風耳：謝陛下指點。等元子神彈第二次爆裂的時候，微臣絕對會全全錄製元子神彈的聲音。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRlcCBkcv64
千裏眼：等元子神彈第二次爆裂的時候，微臣會戴上彩色的眼鏡，不會讓你再看黑白電影。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzbvo7IUTTX
玉帝：都給我住口！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡED74Q4E9CZ
千裏眼/順風耳：陛下，我們的想法難道不好嗎？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMuPSkKP6aC
玉帝：是好想法。做為你們的老大，我常常教導你們，做神要低調，不要張口閉口神啊神的。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLHnhEm5cdA
千裏眼/順風耳：臣等明白！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡILR84TlGpp
玉帝：以後說起元子神彈要去掉「神」字，改稱——元子彈。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcn0lc4B1wG
千裏眼/順風耳：元子彈？？？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA2mljWfItw
（在下界元子彈的爆裂處——花果山，位於沙漠地帶，山上山下寸草不生。由於上界元子彈71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBCc18JuClF
爆裂，產生肥沃的土壤，使花果山方圓百裏變的有花、有果，成為名副其實的——花果山！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbcGhxo4WS
（山上莫名其妙地會聚了一群猴子）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0MWsDSsFM
（由於上界在此進行了上千年的元子彈試驗，一個路過的猴子慘遭輻射，導致基因突變，成71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62QotlXtxQ
為神猴！親們，因為神猴是元子彈產生的，所以這裏我們先稱神猴為——元猴。）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9Ow5DtbVn
（山上的群猴正在水裏洗澡、玩耍，元猴走到水邊，準備跳入水中）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNjWpD6H0RE
通背猿猴：等等！（一把攔住元猴）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbnNXQ3jcJ
元猴：幹嘛？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySBCppPV8q
通背猿猴：你要幹嘛？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgFSMMWqwQj
元猴：我打算洗個澡。可以吧？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvs4hJqrlx
通背猿猴：可以。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPnsZlYDFS
（元猴想跳入水中，又被一把攔住）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ564yjTSN3m
元猴：你要幹嘛？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9CFpczKrfY
通背猿猴：我……我聞到你身上有股怪味兒。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZmDzghT2o
元猴：不是怪味兒，是火藥味兒。你的鼻子出問題了，勸你趕快去看五官科的太醫。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhKN4KU2mK8
通背猿猴：你身上怎麽會有火藥味兒？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqRU5qNad8
元猴：說來話長。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaWT0IEf0C
通背猿猴：我想聽聽。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYaApKuxSWi
元猴：我急著洗澡，我洗澡先怎樣？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnapJYomEGw
通背猿猴：我急著聽你的話，你說先怎樣？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzufJQmEju
元猴：好吧。關於我身上的火藥味兒～～～71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0uaTswzkm
通背猿猴：嗯……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnnGfb3ur78
元猴：一不小心就有了。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO2IAF3mtak
通背猿猴：啊。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCMEZnrujAU
（噗通！元猴縱身跳入水中）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6DFxHGJsa
通背猿猴：哇！這個入水動作，簡直太美了！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhdV1sppOo
（群猴繼續在水裏玩耍。忽然，聽到一個猴子大叫！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuaMBtvFrBF
猴子甲：有黑洞！有黑洞！……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKD4XUow4n1
（猴子甲指著上流的瀑布處大叫著，水中群猴都被吸引上岸）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3VKPozEddd
通背猿猴：黑洞？什麽是黑洞啊？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡldbHMF1acZ
元猴：笨豬！黑洞就是沒有燈光和火光的洞啦！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD5AaGxs5B7
通背猿猴：貌似你知道很多。你進去看看怎樣？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTbJGuDdLTW
元猴：有誰進去過沒有？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLoFQ8ylkf
通背猿猴：剛發現的，應該沒有。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Y6ShYl61I
元猴：我可沒那個膽量。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsY2BUysokl
通背猿猴：那你瞎嚷嚷什麽？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX8Ve7XGmVV
元猴：我看你不了解，解釋一下給你聽嘍。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7wxxrDSD1b
通背猿猴：哪個膽大的敢進洞看看啊？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyxDnSMr9k
（眾猴不語）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuOVE8yCigA
通背猿猴：誰敢進黑洞，我們就拜他為王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4CGs2zceA
（眾猴又不語。過了一會兒）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jWh0Jr42G
元猴：我進去看看怎樣？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuZkTyu996
通背猿猴：你怎麽過了一會兒才說出來？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY53F8WLiwt
元猴：我一向很謙虛，沒想到諸位比我更謙虛。我花時間考慮了一下，最後做出決定，所以71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDUNvJqTgkq
過了一會兒。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSn1gskqR8h
通背猿猴：廢話少說！你這就進洞吧。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDOoOn7aLH
元猴：我有個要求。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RBMJ26i1F
通背猿猴：說。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4TPK9fSgJJ
元猴：我聽說身體進入黑洞可能會導致時空穿越，如果我進黑洞後穿越到500年前或500年後，猴王不但做不成，我從此還消失了。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBZRnhsZfm
通背猿猴：你想怎樣？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kKyptNe3v
元猴：你們總的建個標誌性的建築紀念紀念我吧？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZLVBzlCyR
通背猿猴：好！你消失後就在此給你立個牌子，上寫：某某某在此穿越！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Z7rWUvds2
元猴：牌子的原料要選非常堅硬的石頭，「某某某在此穿越！」要選用利刀深深的刻在石頭上面，還要……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlpIK8H4Evz
通背猿猴：好！好！好！都答應你！你快進去吧！進去吧！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNu40aJpjWV
（通背猿猴雙手一推元猴，元猴飛身離地，穿過瀑布，進入黑洞）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBGOLlngXJ
（黑洞內金光閃閃！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJRz1c7Lxof
元猴：哇！難道這裏是座寶藏？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNchp9g7JML
（走近一看，石壁上有10個閃閃發光的大字：花果山福地，水簾洞洞天。）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPaIW7hoSCE
元猴：靠！我以為是金銀珠寶，原來只是幾個閃光字。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT6KM53Lwg1
（砰！一聲，拿出一火把點亮。環視洞中，發現有石鍋、石竈、石碗、石杯、石盆、71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2eEHCNqz3R
石床、石凳……）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQ7UBKyGOd
元猴：這兒家具挺全的，以前應該有人居住。不會是山頂洞人吧？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxGQt388xr
（洞外）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fz7owRoem
眾猴：怎麽還不出來？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡye37SDpkGP
通背猿猴：唉！我們為他立碑吧。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIPCtu2m3U
（嗖——！一聲，但見瀑布處水花濺出，緊接著有一不明飛行物飛出黑洞！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4G3hGrVWAS
通背猿猴：有飛碟！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJPwH8tMPj
（不明飛行物一落地，卻是元猴。眾猴圍上）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAySbGbx7pK
眾猴：黑洞裏邊有什麽？黑洞裏邊有什麽？…………71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6hkKrV2zZp
元猴：這個……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEfe8bCGcb
通背猿猴：某某某，黑洞裏邊有什麽？快說！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOIlnU0c3JM
眾猴：某某某快說！某某某快說！……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHTAgVDNowd
元猴：諸位，你們對我的稱謂，是不是該換換了？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvteqHxlM0A
通背猿猴：什麽稱謂換換什麽啦？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBpUPAIMd0
元猴：你當眾說，誰敢進洞就拜誰為王。我進去了。你們這幫無賴還不拜我為王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRzOwkG3xF
通背猿猴：哈哈！不好意思。我們一時心急想知道黑洞的秘密，把那事忘了。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPb1TM9inU
元猴：現在想起來了吧？用不用我再提醒你們一遍？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymMaSrBafe
通背猿猴：不用！不用！都來拜見我們的大王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡouvrjxx4XV
眾猴：拜見大王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrDb5gbIoeU
（群猴俯首而拜，高呼：大王萬歲！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZnOMBZ2EY
通背猿猴：大王啊，黑洞裏面……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBL4azp2oD
猴王：黑洞裏面是個三室兩廳兩衛的房子。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ16o1wJuZwl
通背猿猴：原來是個三居室。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtUTrQg7TVT
猴王：可以這麽說。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRxTgRaMjP
通背猿猴：房子不小，可惜容不下我們全部入住。留著給大王住吧。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuoCLBuIPs6
猴王：雖是個三居室，可每居都有上百平米，足夠我們全全入住。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKOUkeTnQD
通背猿猴：哦！這樣的話，我們就和大王群居！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUvk0u5qqg
猴王：是同居！你用詞文雅一點好不好？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNntFwVXxB
通背猿猴：我們什麽時候搬進去？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZVtOKJcFPL
猴王：現在就搬。隨我來！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQO4FFu7FT
（群猴跟著猴王飛入洞中）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3imZ5V3fKO
（在洞內，眾猴張燈結彩，手舞足蹈，歡天喜地！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2s688i6lu
（通背猿猴看到那幾個閃光的字）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZIaShqiOob
通背猿猴：哈哈！原來這黑洞叫水簾洞。好名字！好名字呀！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJsLFaYUWMj
猴子甲：大王，你也應該有個好名字才好。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmLAGggO20
猴王：你們稱我為王，我已經心滿意足。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGkJD7dKNj
通背猿猴：大王，我看到你縱身跳水的姿勢非常的美，那一瞬間，使我終身難忘。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfy9sAKFtk
猴王：待會兒出去，我再跳給你看。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXRECrZga4
通背猿猴：不如，我們就稱你為美猴王吧！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrL0taXYBtB
猴王：美猴王？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqilV4smSrT
群猴：美猴王！美猴王！美猴王！…………71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGzTW3V21pk
猴王：隨你們的便啦。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzh5G0rfSN
猴子甲：大王叫美猴王，我叫麗猴王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmDQlnBW1CW
猴子乙：我叫帥猴王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rgF2eNL8S
猴子丙：我叫酷猴王！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGOyaAYNJ46
…………71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3SKCDuE0ub
（美猴王把通背猿猴叫道一旁）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXo8h5Kzh0
美猴王：你打算叫什麽？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmbitlRPVf9
通背猿猴：好名字都被他們搶了，我無所謂了。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5oOL0YOB2
美猴王：你貴姓？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLPA7GYaM1
通背猿猴：姓通。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8I8RR4TxjG
美猴王：名字？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcrjCdCA5w
通背猿猴：背。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIMby0IEQq
美猴王：背什麽？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPan3rvnob
通背猿猴：只有一個背。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpBNifLDIx
美猴王：嗯，本大王冊封你為通背猴王怎樣？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnW6IcJ9Fm2
通背猿猴：好名字！大王有文采！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwA08CdpkNL
（至此，花果山水簾洞建立了以美猴王為首的猴王帝國！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCERDr88xN
（一日，美猴王正在設宴與群臣喝酒，傳令猴急匆匆跑進水簾洞）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAE4mObh0Gj
傳令猴：報告大王，出事了！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuOSQclqCT
美猴王：愛卿何事驚慌？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqKL7UbsiVC
傳令猴：帥猴王在攀山時不小心墜入懸崖摔死了。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6v7UwmFbrT
美猴王：啊！我的帥愛卿，你去的太早了！55555……（痛哭流涕）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJgLRhXWnxj
（美猴王在花果山為帥猴王舉行了莊嚴隆重的葬禮。葬禮上，群猴紛紛落淚。）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMxS7UMJkV
（群猴都不哭了，只有美猴王哭泣不止）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡntXh3WbWS6
通背猿猴：大王，猴死不能復生。希望你……71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Bb8UT0Gpz
美猴王：55555……（哭的更加厲害）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkxskzCxXx6
群猴：大王，別哭了。帥猴王永遠活在我們心中。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7lAM4UFQe
美猴王：我不是僅僅為我的帥愛卿而哭，他只不過是去的早了一點。諸位想一想，百年之後我們都會像帥猴王一樣離開這個美麗富饒的花果山，離開這個逍遙自在世界。你們不覺得這樣的結局很悲慘嗎？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoGCuSEcl5
（群猴聽罷，一個個掩面悲啼！）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSZ9t0T26ur
通背猿猴：大王，你的意思是，我們活的再長久，都不免一死？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcs2eKmvCnP
美猴王：嗯啊！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1wTUerdDo
通背猿猴：大王想要長生不死，不是沒有辦法。71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKrIyhjY9H
美猴王：不是沒有辦法就是有辦法了？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVBRTGlygf
通背猿猴：嗯啊！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuItwgky0nW
美猴王：快說！快說！快說！快說！快說！快說！………71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7DVwf9D48
通背猿猴：在海外的古洞仙山住有神仙，大王可登門拜訪，學個長生不老之術，不生不滅，與天地山川齊壽！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5VWAY5HXD1
美猴王：來人！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWEFR5BbO2
傳令猴：大王何事？71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1dBhhNQ38
美猴王：備船！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzdA7a9xXM
傳令猴：是！71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AV44hwnd6
（嗖——！猴王乘船漂洋過海尋訪神仙去了）71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlm06GiW6PE
71Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ3Qzo1xDPI
大話囍遊
作者:
刀鋒戰水
刀鋒戰水
篇 #1
第01回 猴王出世
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