賤男人周記 - 第五回幾分傷心幾分痴

第五回幾分傷心幾分痴235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQWaj3urbKN
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相信好多男人都會撞過女人發脾氣，唔理佢係你女友、老婆、上司、甚至係亞媽。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzt9TY5Obx0
通常都係有一個共通點就係你講乜佢地都聽唔入耳，唔好意圖或嘗試同佢地講道理，玩自己架咋。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUnMYPK6llR
總之你出聲就鬧你駁嘴狡辯，你唔出聲就鬧你做乜唔出聲，真係好難服侍。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡft55m8IRsp
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見到老婆咁嘅樣我望住個女打咗個眼色，之後佢好醒目粒聲唔出走返入房。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgqLAXkB2T
做咗咁多年老婆奴當然識得點面對呢D情況啦。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzOe8VcfSJ
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呢個時候大家要注意自己講野嘅語氣，唔好比人有一種唔耐煩又或者係挑釁嘅感覺，235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNGVQ9JPmp
將平日講野嘅聲線再壓底三度就差唔多，無錯就係同太監一樣。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA2MQ1VRQ6l
我：[皇…唔係，老婆…妳唔係要OT咩？]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡihBW6obJhD
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皇…唔係，老婆連望都無望我一眼講：[唔好提啦，明明約好都可以甩底。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1oZYyreHZ7
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我：[呢D人真過份，咁…妳食咗野未呀？]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBY4cXo9Ku
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老婆：[食唔落呀。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJRRYY1mWQr
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我：[咁…休息下先囉。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArjeX7vmUW
當我想返入房時。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOsxdM4Xthn
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老婆：[你幫我煮個餐蛋麵。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLEhWDyvtXh
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我：[好…我現在即刻煮。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFZCUcF7iug
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKW8uzKUgJ4
老婆：[你地啱啱落街食野呀？]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehWxTM0CZZ
仆街啦…235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKOaIROjGvH
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我：[係…呀…]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOymPwIQCtF
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老婆：[食乜呀？]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5hBqYWFbA
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOhnLkRAnLg
我：[哦…重可以食乜丫，咪樓下茶記囉。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB6eTDWISUd
如果比老婆知道我地兩條友去食日本野無預佢鬧死都似。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDfpQY7bCdz
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嗱嗱聲走入房換衫然後煮個麵比老婆食。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlvtSGvFeQM
好快手攞住碗熱辣辣原味出前一丁餐蛋麵出呢：[食得啦。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPttA6osRUC
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老婆望一望碗麵即刻話：[無菜嘅？]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjmLhR9wuBS
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我：[吓…妳想食菜呀？我…即刻煮。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6unpXvXqZ
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyOVDZ6TWpX
老婆：[我咪話平日要食多D菜健康D囉，唉…算啦，唔洗啦。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBr8lF3hNaO
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講健康就唔好食餐蛋麵啦。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaP8rWn3106
不過呢D場口最好都係出小句聲自動消失係最安全。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCwd337HVXW
老婆一邊食野一邊睇電視，我又對電視節目無乜興趣於是入房開咗部HiFi放鬆下聽下歌休息。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKSzOWT9CzL
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年紀大都係鐘意聽D自己年代嘅歌，特別係八零年代尾九零年代頭，可以話係香港樂壇最高峰期，四大天皇、哥哥、梅姐、王菲、憶蓮、Sammy、粒粒巨星，相比起現在…唉。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡePbuyZPRjT
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今日聽乜好呢？望住個CD架上面排得密麻麻嘅CD，手指一指，就聽王傑啦。以前唔明點解一個大男人可以唱到死人冧樓咁慘，人大咗先知嗰種無奈係要用時間換返呢。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtJzYy3CsuL
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放入CD喇叭傅呢王傑哭喪一樣嘅歌聲：[哭泣聲絕無意義它不會扭轉分開的心意…]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMkHMkjdea
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就係我培養緊情緒時，忽然老婆大叫：[老公！]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpXNGmj5b0u
唉，又乜呀…235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJO20Hqf63
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTD54ihzteP
扭細聲部HiFi問：[乜野事？]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bPkUUdB2a
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5k1Cz9qf4
老婆：[唔好聽王傑啦，唱到死人冧樓咁，我想聽mirror呀。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi2v9tMdCEG
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfYoaerShD
係唔係玩野呀…235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMtOT6V6tc
好多男人都話，玩HIFI最大敵人唔係地方同金錢，而係女人同細路，真係一D都無講錯。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLXhgOemcD
我：[我無買mirror D碟喎。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKieJlxYBcw
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ACVViKMTB
老婆：[youtube咪有囉。]235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRhOu8P306
頂…只好開youtube比老婆聽mirror，自己就用earphone塞住耳仔一邊用手機聽歌一邊搵樂敏傾計。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRnbEP3vh6
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我：【妳今朝同我講話同條仔上床呀？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT4XvKrpn9z
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdU4aKxh3S9
樂敏好快就回覆我：【係呀。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZknhd3Yli
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKTmn3NCsVD
我：【咁佢條件一定唔差啦。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsMVDGrRkS8
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEor9023hfO
樂敏：【OK啦，佢揸車過呢接我去Soho食意大利菜。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5fbOInrb8m
一出手就soho，唔怪得之溝到女。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERftxontFu
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtfoG0Lnlm
我：【咁呢餐飯一定食得好開心啦。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKtbr0hsYu
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樂敏：【好一般。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfKaxgUa121
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDIv46MlBy
我：【妳講食物定人先？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhDgt3cez6
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ZnggOi1Aq
樂敏：【兩樣都係。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPRktqba39
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我真係忍唔住問：【咁妳又同佢上床？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn89RRVbisC
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2gbTR7mxn
樂敏：【咁食完飯見佢幾大隻又有時間咪同佢玩下囉。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ33MQYRoOOZ
睇到呢句個心真係酸到呢…235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYUACmaXRZ
超，亞明，酸乜春野啫，你又唔係人地嘅SL，你只不過係一個比較好傾嘅網友乍。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvsmQqGdHI3
咁我都知，不過…都想喺呢到講句，希望所有有偷食嘅紀巴如果你地睇到呢篇野嘅話，幫幫忙，比條生路呢行下得唔得呀。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BEpy0Bi5V
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雖然心情已經跌到谷底，但係點都要懶大方扮關心問一句：【咁…玩得開唔開心？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSwYHYdlkzn
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樂敏：【唔太開心。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf37XIUKlZX
又估唔到佢會咁答我喎，唔通又係另一個外強中乾嘅真男人？235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ33IRn075Br
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咁我好奇即刻再追問：【Why？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4d49xlbw5
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMJf2ODb0N
樂敏：【佢同我做時我都feel唔到愛。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1GWXe4ytQg
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwQX50tGLI
我：【吓…】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLT7RQo9rhj
如果有一條女肯同我上床，但係又要我表現出愛呢樣野先，咁我真R晒頭唔知應該點做，235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvmFZj9pvLp
唔通一路做一路大叫對方個名？樂敏！樂敏！妳好正呀！235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCr0GNmNTlv
咁同喺公園放狗叫Lucky！Lucky！Good boy！有乜分別？235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36U4sG3cLJ
不過入馬場見D人大叫隻馬名上呀！上呀！又真係充滿愛意架喎。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3dDKk80ys
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHF4VjA0rI
定係好似品評藝術品一樣？235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjw1QDZqQ1
樂敏，妳嘅完美嘅身段係市面上好稀有，相信可以去蘇富比拍賣搵到一個好收藏家。拍賣女人聽聞犯法架喎。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8F3nV2b1c
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTAu1sbXVf
對於呢D咁迷嘅野我讀得書少唔識只好直接咁問一句：【咁啫係點呀？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwwt4hL2Mxa
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5NrY8LzMqV
樂敏：【總之，我覺得佢只係想搵我發洩做完就算。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLkDgd6rL8
咁似D男人去叫雞嘅，我幾乎想問佢有無放底幾舊先走，不過咁講又好hurt人。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTL97wgDZGC
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1stSKScIIY
我：【或者佢緊趕時間啫，妳咪比多次機會佢囉。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcEGElwVej
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOSIKHSr9a6
樂敏：【唔啦，唔鍾意就搵過一個算，又唔係無選擇無謂浪費時間。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HSvKWtXeB
唉，呢個世界幾咁唔公平,點解女人玩app咁多選擇。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhWChDWr6j
鬼叫香港女少男多咩，特別係玩app，我諗個比例真係一比九十九。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFmsmnbiqZ
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGhENVfQjMb
咁男人係唔係無選擇？又唔係嘅，呢D好睇個人能力，你食飯都唔會只係叫一個餸啦。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcX1tzdIh0
我鐘意食二餸飯，三餸係我嘅極限。不過識女我都係鐘意一次一個。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXegkIAQ7J
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxhJDWn9pzT
樂敏繼續講：【其實搵咗咁耐都重係無人除取代都佢嘅地位。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6xuHpJIG6
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡco4b73Qq5G
我：【妳重好掛住之前個SL？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7AR9bmhp1
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssYGljSt0y
樂敏：【太多回憶，你知唔知呀，佢睇住我個仔出世又幫我手照顧，我對佢重多過對我老公，所以好難話放底就放底。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCT4YD2CGhD
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hEb5lw4f5
老公成日唔係香港情夫就成日見。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL4EBVoceH6
我：【其實…妳有無擔心過個仔唔係妳老公架？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3YEL98jvo
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs43GUvT6yh
樂敏：【哈哈，有架，SL又唔鐘意戴套喎，有時安全期都未必準架嗎。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkPnsinuGoy
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8hlNHme9bR
我：【咁點算，check DNA？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFf3GzILxrF
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ4w3zj9JhB
樂敏：【無呀，咁我老公係快啫，又唔係唔得，而且個仔越大越似老公，所以應該係佢。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3klPRVEb0P
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBscPkpcNYU
我：【哦，咁都好D，好少聽妳講舊SL，妳同佢一齊幾耐？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCoxSjH9m84
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtK7ngZm7jv
樂敏：【七年，如果唔係有一日個仔問起個哥哥係邊個我諗我地都唔會分開。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNFiRd27qS
我諗係香港好多人嘅婚姻都無七年咁耐，邊個夠膽話SL只係短炒唔可以長揸架。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVOpR5XRjW
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVqp5CWB14
我：【連細路都知道咁就麻煩。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszjiJ9IvON
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樂敏：【嗯。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxoFEv8b3cE
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我：【我記得妳話過佢細妳好多。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQlbpDRCTM
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGpDTpFX0KP
樂敏：【嗯，十年，所以我地唔會有結果。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3mEGRtmQa
你地腦入面係唔係好多畫面出現呢？食小鮮肉喎，真係AV情節一樣。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy5Qtm54z7e
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfwzwpX3A4
我：【咁佢現在點？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8t8m1Shtt0
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樂敏：【早排佢結婚，臨結婚前一晚佢搵我，佢話好掛住我。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72D6FnDwGC
正常嘅，如果我廿幾歲時識到一個好似樂敏咁正嘅SL我都唔想放手啦。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Yxltp9RbC
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Lw1xlqyEO
我：【佢想同妳繼續？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrCJp7UwAsj
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRrD6qcHQp
樂敏：【唔係，佢只係話掛住我，但係又如何，我地根本無可能係埋一齊。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDV8vAFYJoJ
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh60ytiXY01
我：【咁妳想唔想同佢一齊？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkAa8tRfmhY
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhNJf26vUZ
樂敏：【想又點，佢都已經結咗婚，而我亦唔會因為佢而離婚，我現在擁有嘅野佢比唔到我。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7MSbWUmkX
咁又係麵包與愛情，根本無選擇。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ653TovYhxv
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMExDRNLEp
我：【唉，人生就係咁無奈，咁只好繼續搵啦。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBs7J9mg9pU
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWJ8hyv5bg
樂敏：【好攰，唔想再搵住。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4M37Rw9yLS
聽聞佢上個星期佢都係咁講喎，女人講野都係信唔過。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJrDa6WFo1f
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDW7ki89KhL
我：【妳唔悶咩？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6J4sHE5FSa
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa7qmhEiqoj
樂敏：【悶咪搵你囉。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOt1dgPA3gv
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5l0H6v0Egp
我：【超，我約妳妳都唔得閒。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21aBb9aMy5
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlxMYYOIAh
樂敏：【乜你有約過我咩？點解我唔記得架？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunsMjNBRU1
到底係我存在感太低定係佢太多人約唔記得我。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkzS2D7Alo3
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQeY1mJyeTf
我：【我有約過妳睇戲架，不過妳話無興趣之嗎。】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMcz7NL2Ou
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fF18gdCz6
樂敏：【又好似係，哈哈，不過都係一次啫，點解你唔再約我嘅？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNtZFDxYAd
其實唔係我唔想約樂敏，只係每次同佢傾計佢都話識咗新仔，一陣又話同新仔出街食飯，啱啱重爆埋房添，你叫我點開口？235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazy6mthFiT
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8BLC8NXuu
我邊有咁強自信可以係佢嗰班有車有樓有錢人有時間有肌肉嘅裙下之臣中突圍而出呀，都係做佢嘅樹窿聽下佢講下點樣食仔算吧啦。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCJPcoI9Ow
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7uOuHrbGa
忽然，樂敏問咗一個好有趣嘅問。235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNJqgeZ1p6
235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fyx7FVHL1
樂敏：【衰野呀，我問你，如果比你你會唔會同我上床？】235Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs59MDanUKh
呢句說話係唔係暗示緊D乜野？