79Please respect copyright.PENANAl9N1jDuBlM
本人對於那件事的後續一點印象也沒有了,似乎打擊太大時大腦會啟動防衛機制喪失某些記憶,不過最重要的過程他都記得、甚至無法原諒自己,只忘卻後續善後的部分可說是毫無意義,或許僅僅是發現自己殺人的當下就昏過去了也說不定。79Please respect copyright.PENANAXz2l7n2b1B
79Please respect copyright.PENANAMJdZlIN8Ux
獨人不知道答案,警察也沒有告訴他,他只有在後續作筆錄的時候得知爸爸媽媽哭得很傷心,聽說他們加班到晚上九點多回家時,打開門就是一陣嗆鼻的血腥味,走到廚房發現獨人跪坐在地一動也不動,茉紅梨也是躺在他腿上靜止不動,以他們為中心蔓延的濃稠液體也有開始乾涸的跡象。79Please respect copyright.PENANANxjC8cCMCt
79Please respect copyright.PENANA1pYBIfEKIu
聽說爸媽沒有責怪他,甚至在醫護人員以及警察到場的時候持續幫他講話,雖然很激動也不知所措,甚至在整個現場犯人明顯到無論怎麼推測都會走向獨人殺了人的劇情上,他們依然站在他這邊,說肯定是有什麼誤會他不可能做這種傻事,就算真的發生了他也絕對不是故意的。79Please respect copyright.PENANAxxNo4EIJZw
79Please respect copyright.PENANA8NsitnFhCd
除了忌妒天生擁有特別的個性之外,最讓獨人忌妒的就是爸媽的愛被茉紅梨搶走。可當知道了父母其實仍然深愛自己時,已經來不及了。79Please respect copyright.PENANAdTeDnnPDW4
79Please respect copyright.PENANAOICtz3L6nz
在偵訊室裡將所有一切娓娓道來,獨人的表情悲傷到連負責偵訊的檢察官都開始憐憫,只不過一切早已為時已晚。79Please respect copyright.PENANAy5Y0HHtIAE
79Please respect copyright.PENANA16hpB6SMJs
殺了人就必須受到法律的制裁,往後獨人必須以少年殺人犯身分出庭接受審判,在判刑之前他進了少年觀護所。79Please respect copyright.PENANAahtdYqh0Bb
79Please respect copyright.PENANAPQLS48LZXt
本以為一進去,直到判刑後行刑期滿之前都不可能獲得自由,結果因為獨人不僅態度極佳、甚至他善用自己敏銳的洞察力觀察正副所長的喜好並討他們歡心,終於在第二週取得了每週兩次在輔導員陪同下得以前往墓地祭拜的機會。
79Please respect copyright.PENANAmALW7J9vX9
「還是不吃嗎?」
79Please respect copyright.PENANAsXpuGgbRdF
說話的人是每次掃墓都會遇到的春菅,要說他把這裡當家了都不為過。他總是帶著飯糰來,然後在遇到獨人時親切問候順便遞上一顆其中形狀最漂亮的。79Please respect copyright.PENANAPRHRVQGkrd
79Please respect copyright.PENANAulu1XrSwci
與在少年觀護所裏頭對人花言巧語的神態大相逕庭,獨人掃墓時總是沉默寡言,不僅拒絕春菅的好意,連話都不怎麼回。79Please respect copyright.PENANAIaiQDrt555
79Please respect copyright.PENANANt1M0Hry5m
「你人真好呢,一週來祭拜兩次的人可沒幾個。」79Please respect copyright.PENANABGGRLmT7bh
79Please respect copyright.PENANA1bxemjQBOD
「……」79Please respect copyright.PENANAtnxxziki5l
79Please respect copyright.PENANAXh4btCKZgx
春菅邊大口嚼著被獨人拒絕的米飯與餡料,心直口快地道出心聲,不過這段不經大腦的發言在旁人耳裡聽來就像在諷刺:只有你閒閒沒事做能一直過來。獨人無語。79Please respect copyright.PENANAVznD26vaUO
79Please respect copyright.PENANA5wVXhEdL2g
「這樣說來,果然感情最好的還是我跟我老婆了呢。」他將食物嚥下,並為前一句話下了個總結。79Please respect copyright.PENANA3uvl1pQ3VW
79Please respect copyright.PENANAF6CFLMTEnM
獨人無意間聽到一聲嘆息,那是春菅的聲音,瞥眼看去,他望著妻子的墓露出最哀傷的微笑,眼神裡盡是滿溢的寂寞。79Please respect copyright.PENANAW9ctkdX9kO
79Please respect copyright.PENANAIG1eMGWNRf
既然感情如此深刻,離別就得承擔相同份量的孤獨吧,獨人如此推測。他貌似能理解,卻又無法完全共感,畢竟他自己的情況肯定是複雜許多。79Please respect copyright.PENANANELVYIHHEH
79Please respect copyright.PENANAhvAOe2GH9l
一邊是懺悔、一邊是思念。比起自己,隔壁那位頹廢大叔的心靈是壓倒性的高尚,獨人就算想回話也沒資格對他做任何評論。79Please respect copyright.PENANAR8YcSGsVUJ
79Please respect copyright.PENANAmQNMTMhTnY
眼看時間似乎差不多了,獨人從祭拜的跪姿站起,不料石磚地面有幾處凍結,正巧踩到光滑處,他失去平衡向前倒去——79Please respect copyright.PENANA7UTko2mQZD
79Please respect copyright.PENANAjBqXJshJrU
「喂喂……你想陪她也不必這麼快就準備讓自己埋在她隔壁吧?」79Please respect copyright.PENANAeDTB7hfPsR
79Please respect copyright.PENANAo9sFXO4WCM
獨人聽到這句很冷的玩笑話時,他人已經站在稍遠一點的地方了。79Please respect copyright.PENANAPLZEN9tait
79Please respect copyright.PENANAnclb7CMEkX
他不太明白發生了什麼,剛才滑倒時的視野由上往下急速翻轉,最後一刻入眼的是墓碑角落,是一個頭撞下去肯定會受傷的地方。79Please respect copyright.PENANASh46LSfOI2
79Please respect copyright.PENANALo0bw8isa8
春菅握著他的手腕站在身旁,本來應該是站在距離他十公尺左右的位置才對。79Please respect copyright.PENANACfiwHSvy6s
79Please respect copyright.PENANA0fUfDb6uOS
雖然不清楚是怎麼辦到的,但顯然是那個人拉他一把,「……謝謝。」79Please respect copyright.PENANASZNIzdIJ6t
79Please respect copyright.PENANAu6rM5SBa75
「沒事就好。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAeeI10fN9ip
79Please respect copyright.PENANAo1n6oyoXV7
「是你的個性嗎?」79Please respect copyright.PENANAP3SMCOkz9n
79Please respect copyright.PENANAcIot0nRVnE
春菅不知為何臉色沉了下來,「瞬間移動而已,也不是什麼大不了的個性。」79Please respect copyright.PENANArHU1RhsRe0
79Please respect copyright.PENANA5KDO3cwX1c
剛才春菅的舉動就像個英雄,利用個性拯救他人,甚至讓獨人想起了茉紅梨,他開始疑惑為什麼這個人可以謙虛到這個地步。79Please respect copyright.PENANAYYqbyZ7MCw
79Please respect copyright.PENANAmiNPeBDBkC
突然想起了什麼,獨人的眼眸睜大了些。79Please respect copyright.PENANAYL6PXYLZKV
79Please respect copyright.PENANAFQBKf5I4U0
「瞬間移動……難道你是職業英雄嗎?」79Please respect copyright.PENANAsYhfGlO9Ej
79Please respect copyright.PENANAyualFWffnA
這個問句顯然引起春菅的不悅,比剛才臉色更加沈重,不過並不是針對獨人的負面情緒,只是有些哀愁,「為什麼這麼問?」79Please respect copyright.PENANAa4cHNf7NKW
79Please respect copyright.PENANAyLMBPbNxQM
「有個英雄的個性也是瞬間移動,我不知道長相,他低調過了頭,這讓我有點無法理解。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAPFLlDbvigz
79Please respect copyright.PENANAbyXyb4Frz6
在少年觀護所裡需要上心靈矯正課程,其中有提及一些不為人知的英雄。79Please respect copyright.PENANAuOVRylHUim
79Please respect copyright.PENANAUAzm21uneE
垂下眼簾的春菅一臉滄桑,伸手撫向墓碑上的名字,獨人這才發現他們現在移動到的是春菅每次都佇足許久的位置——他祭拜的墓前。79Please respect copyright.PENANA771uyKnlHd
79Please respect copyright.PENANAqYe9MRjO1M
「我妻子一直希望我當英雄幫助他人,不過我倒是一點興趣也沒有,所以遲遲沒有去考執照。」79Please respect copyright.PENANA65deePVAXc
79Please respect copyright.PENANA8veRkICYoD
都講到這份上了,春菅等於間接承認剛才的英雄身份問題,所以獨人露出認真的表情,決定當個稱職的傾聽人,等待故事的後續。79Please respect copyright.PENANAob3w3CSlg1
79Please respect copyright.PENANAjNkX6W6Ske
「幾年前某天在下班的顛峰時間,我妻子搭乘的公車被敵人挾持了,雖然英雄救了絕大部分的人質,但她還是不幸成為極少數的犧牲者。」79Please respect copyright.PENANA6zIA2zI68r
79Please respect copyright.PENANA4JRolkFOsH
春菅顫抖的嗓音從緊咬的齒縫中發出。79Please respect copyright.PENANAnEFMk7gTpc
79Please respect copyright.PENANAaJuH5LaSih
「可以瞬間移動的我在收到通知趕去時已經來不及了。」79Please respect copyright.PENANA7KxRRr70Ny
79Please respect copyright.PENANAapCLHYFEGC
回想起那不堪回首的過去,春菅臉上的憔悴與不修邊幅的面容十分相襯,看来能力所及卻沒有辦到的事,遠比起無能為力還要更悔恨。79Please respect copyright.PENANAInOuANIeAI
79Please respect copyright.PENANAmC6Ws2gtSR
「雖然遲了,但我當英雄只是為了遵從她的希望,甚至盡可能去挽救一些性命減少我這樣的悲劇吧。」79Please respect copyright.PENANANxkg6ttOIh
79Please respect copyright.PENANAz4Vx3oH2B7
獨人瞥向春菅手指輕柔觸碰的位置,那是他妻子的名字,聽起來是個美人擁有的名字,「癒花小姐她肯定很幸福。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAAMpjA8YuLu
79Please respect copyright.PENANAC2grEizqGz
日日前來祭拜並奉上最真誠的思念,想必天上的妻子一定感受到這份祝福了吧。79Please respect copyright.PENANAt7Im6NSlOY
79Please respect copyright.PENANAJZa2bzbcvy
「謝謝你,獨人。」春菅喪著眉努力擠出微笑回敬,可獨人卻從目光中感受到了同情,這份情感令他感到彆扭之外,也順道解開了某些不自然之處。79Please respect copyright.PENANAdPz6GpgNyn
79Please respect copyright.PENANAJ0XiOpwALg
——「茉紅梨肯定也很幸福。」據獨人觀察,人們通常會回覆這般客套話,可春菅什麼也沒說。79Please respect copyright.PENANAsMtkGrouHD
79Please respect copyright.PENANAEwBhy7Wbrv
仔細想想,似乎從雙方自我介紹過後,春菅就再也沒稱讚過獨人與茉紅梨之間的關係了。 79Please respect copyright.PENANAffB9I6lsv3
79Please respect copyright.PENANAjHY5hKYfQT
沈默半晌,獨人終於做好心理準備,深吸一口氣。79Please respect copyright.PENANAIlPeKXopX9
79Please respect copyright.PENANAaBH8lRnXqr
「我……」79Please respect copyright.PENANAf8wBtRxGYj
79Please respect copyright.PENANAjmJzrIABM6
高三的少年有著已變聲完的渾厚嗓音,蘊含著對自己的憤怒與不可饒恕,聲音經喉頭擠壓顯得有些沙啞。79Please respect copyright.PENANArX7NIY21mt
79Please respect copyright.PENANALxefe5PJz8
「殺了茉紅梨。」79Please respect copyright.PENANA8dpUUkMoVa
79Please respect copyright.PENANA9WX8dBTrKW
已經沒有什麼比這還要可怕的事情了,獨人總是無神的黑眸此時無所畏懼直直凝視對方,看春菅那張貌似早已知道真相、內心無波瀾的表情,獨人就明白自己的推測是對的。79Please respect copyright.PENANA2bI6trPOxn
79Please respect copyright.PENANAIsMsh2h3E6
「你早就知道了吧?伊堂先生。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAYmUJ2N0YEA
79Please respect copyright.PENANAX1HfuOI9tk
「嗯,抱歉。」春菅回覆地簡短。79Please respect copyright.PENANApU61yEaN4n
79Please respect copyright.PENANAIzb2GaUwrh
79Please respect copyright.PENANAqbl14VHVNK
春菅當初認為獨人的祭拜之人是女朋友,尚未取得法律上的連結,等同於擁有各自不同姓氏。獨人對陌生人自我介紹卻不連名帶姓說出只道了個名,此舉動毫無禮節可言,春菅卻不以為意,非但沒追問甚至一樣只報上後面的名字。79Please respect copyright.PENANAvIGJLNArZV
79Please respect copyright.PENANAp1B5ckIehA
而剛才將過去娓娓到來時他說了,那個墓是屬於妻子「伊堂癒花」的,換言之,就算本人從未親口說出,獨人也能明白春菅的姓氏。79Please respect copyright.PENANA3TkWOk2g6a
79Please respect copyright.PENANAaY56GuLIuW
當初獨人刻意隱瞞姓氏也是避免春菅發現他與茉紅梨的親屬連結,他認為做出弒親這種舉動的自己不具備擔任她家人的資格。79Please respect copyright.PENANAzwjYCpmKZM
79Please respect copyright.PENANAt9SkeZ3yrZ
「……這樣啊。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAtNmrvBkRB5
79Please respect copyright.PENANA0C03ACbhh1
春菅在得知獨人名字後只是如此回應。79Please respect copyright.PENANAIuI7CLYBZj
79Please respect copyright.PENANA727D7yKkaw
這是個奇怪的反應,彷彿是在說「原來你就是獨人啊」,不過他當時反應也有些惆悵,或許是在說「原來你是她哥哥呀」,無論哪種都表示春菅已經知道“獨人”是誰了。79Please respect copyright.PENANAPqkYN3wioD
79Please respect copyright.PENANAzNJWOpnGAg
「請問是我家人來這裡參拜時說了什麼嗎?」79Please respect copyright.PENANATDUxpWIFJb
79Please respect copyright.PENANAUYr20yJjOM
無論原因為何,想要知道真相也只有鼓起勇氣一問了,不過少年語氣裡聽不出那年紀該有的好奇,反倒只像隨口問問。79Please respect copyright.PENANAc2bMoFqPA7
79Please respect copyright.PENANAdq63GOQ0j5
「他們常提到你的名字。」見對方本是黯淡的目光更為失色,春菅立刻補充:「總是在上香時對墓碑說著『獨人已經在贖罪了,請原諒他』或是『哥哥沒有討厭妳,他跟我們一樣愛妳』之類的話。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAiMhMqcH1J4
79Please respect copyright.PENANAvXx9T0yiDe
儘管沒有惡意,隨後追加的問句對被問話者而言宛如尖銳審問。79Please respect copyright.PENANAolQ43w2BdE
79Please respect copyright.PENANAV5f6Ys3NHH
「是這樣的吧?」79Please respect copyright.PENANAX0wtyx1YzW
79Please respect copyright.PENANAJ4wN8JjOIz
這是個過於赤裸的疑問,知曉全部原因的話或許就不會如此開口了,獨人將這舉動歸咎於春菅把一切當成意外所致。79Please respect copyright.PENANARNz1GqNh8b
79Please respect copyright.PENANACmEVwhWjG0
哥哥沒有討厭妳。79Please respect copyright.PENANAlWDe2RE4pM
79Please respect copyright.PENANAI2UELFiOZ2
哥哥已經在贖罪了。79Please respect copyright.PENANAdBzxjcwdzB
79Please respect copyright.PENANA1F2W2P4sI3
現在所有針對茉紅梨的負面情緒早已隨著她的生命一同消逝,沒有討厭她,但曾經討厭她。79Please respect copyright.PENANApDuxMszmLy
79Please respect copyright.PENANAL2Sb1V6Skv
以一週兩次的高頻率過來參拜,在心裡頭糾結無數次懺悔,光是這樣就能稱作贖罪嗎?79Please respect copyright.PENANAuH6tWRJwAu
79Please respect copyright.PENANANTiXSKF8N4
「是不是如此……光用口頭是無法證明什麼的。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAb6EIpbfJWd
79Please respect copyright.PENANADUGnfyC6oD
得不出答案的那人無法用是與否來回應。79Please respect copyright.PENANAhafz51vVNe
79Please respect copyright.PENANA5JnfeIO3DR
獨人從春菅身旁緩步走回妹妹的墓前,就算可能再次滑倒也不畏懼,他從擺放在一旁的水桶中用木勺舀起匙水澆淋在石碑上,從平面向外四散的水染深了石塊,深色區域一路蔓延至旁邊的垂直面。79Please respect copyright.PENANAQC2mpfK8An
79Please respect copyright.PENANAYBFpelbHZC
「我親手了結茉紅梨生命的這件事是個事實,不論再怎麼悔改都無法改變事實的。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAsBBStQiZH7
79Please respect copyright.PENANAMrSZTsqZyd
「不,我沒有要苛責你的意思……」79Please respect copyright.PENANAZslNecQnhD
79Please respect copyright.PENANAh8JbLEMahc
「請不要再跟我說話了,跟成為英雄到處拯救性命的伊堂先生不同,我不只一點都不高尚,自私自利、甚至還動手殺了妹妹。這樣的我可沒資格跟你說話。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAZwJXkQFv4Z
79Please respect copyright.PENANApOp8ZEIzrd
一把將木勺扔進水桶裡發出與此靜謐之處格外不搭的吵雜聲響,獨人拉起水桶手把,提著工具準備離開。79Please respect copyright.PENANArjmU4FmRt8
79Please respect copyright.PENANAu2kA1orq5z
「剛才我滑倒的時候拉了我一把,真的很謝謝你,伊堂先生。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAhtOED8RoR4
79Please respect copyright.PENANARdbNu1ev1e
背對著如此說道的他不想對上視線,因為他不小心遷怒了。79Please respect copyright.PENANAQxPCKCCVPy
79Please respect copyright.PENANAXQ2f3eBJMm
方才春菅訴說著父母來這裡時的所作所為,這讓獨人不禁安下心來,事到如今他的家人仍願意當他的後盾,這是多麼令人動容的事。79Please respect copyright.PENANApx1ZTUUVSB
79Please respect copyright.PENANA2DUIe1A5IH
而他也差點跟著原諒自己。79Please respect copyright.PENANAWTcGjA2fyx
79Please respect copyright.PENANAikdlKanFSM
意識到可悲的逃避思想後不自覺對自己生氣。79Please respect copyright.PENANAfmj5rbpyZF
79Please respect copyright.PENANAV8Jkao3enX
「我先走了,失禮了。」79Please respect copyright.PENANAJN7HM4q9gI
79Please respect copyright.PENANAea9wvJ4Edz
最後,獨人只能帶著這份怒氣黯然離去。
79Please respect copyright.PENANAX7l82keBjt