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想請求一些簡單的評論 - 寫作交流討論 | Penana
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想請求一些簡單的評論
石苫籽
#1
我對我最近的小說一直很在意,我覺得我在更新這篇小說的時候,似乎在下半篇有點太倉促了,所以寫的時候感覺很草率。我一直很在意這個問題,想說要找時間再把下半篇拆三集寫詳細一點,不知道大家有什麼想法……
詳細故事在這裡:penana.com/story/85894/%E7%95%B0%E5%9E%8B%E7%A9%BA%E9%96%93-%E4%B8%8B%E9%99%8D%E8%A1%8C%E5%8B%95/issue/1
希望能收到大家的回饋,謝謝。
2 years ago
Reply
極簡·女皇
#2
個人淺見:重點在於您要自行斟酌何處該細寫?何處該輕描淡寫?所謂「繁簡得宜」,彈性調整拿捏好分寸,不是一個法則用到底。
2 years ago
Reply
石苫籽
我覺得有很多地方都應該要細寫欸,我覺得我下半篇的感覺更像是電影解說的影片稿而不是真的小說。
2 years ago
Reply
森羽
#3
一章有點過長,建議改成一章幾節這樣
(雖然以前把一章放到1萬字的好像沒資格說😂😂
2 years ago
Reply
石苫籽
其實一開始是分三集的,但是因為第三集太倉促,所以乾脆全集中在一集,然後在思考再擴充什麼。
2 years ago
Reply
極簡·女皇
#4
個人覺得妳的小說寫得蠻好的,並無交待不清楚的問題。不過,有一些地方有贅詞,建議妳整個自行檢視一遍,稍作調整,還有,請注意邏輯詞(連接詞)的使用,連接詞在創作表現上非常重要。
2 years ago
Reply
石苫籽
好喔謝謝,我再思考要怎麼校稿。
2 years ago
Reply
蕗舟Lunoe
#5
我覺得一章放全文有點容易勸退,因為有些人可能沒耐心或沒時間一口氣看完,就像影片直接放1小時跟拆成10分鐘6集,後者會比較容易讓人接受,建議拆成好幾章去發佈,一章可以抓2000~4000字之間
2 years ago
Reply
石苫籽
其實一開始是分三集的,但是因為第三集太倉促,所以乾脆全集中在一集,然後在思考再擴充什麼。
2 years ago
Reply
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詳細故事在這裡:penana.com/story/85894/%E7%95%B0%E5%9E%8B%E7%A9%BA%E9%96%93-%E4%B8%8B%E9%99%8D%E8%A1%8C%E5%8B%95/issue/1
希望能收到大家的回饋,謝謝。
(雖然以前把一章放到1萬字的好像沒資格說😂😂