Hmm, something tells me The Gray Law isn't going to just give up on a potential client that easy. That, or Hale is going to realize that she needs way more help than she originally thought. Guess we'll see.
Great first chapter. The chess pieces are being placed, and a picture of what kind of crazy chaos is going to happen is beginning to take shape. Let's see where this train takes us.
As for critiques, I would say that they're pretty much the same as the ones I had for the Prologue. The biggest issue being the past/present tense inconsistencies. Once again, though, these are easy fixes. Just a little more proofreading should do the trick.
Keep up the great work! I'll be back for chapter two. :)
Great first chapter. The chess pieces are being placed, and a picture of what kind of crazy chaos is going to happen is beginning to take shape. Let's see where this train takes us.
As for critiques, I would say that they're pretty much the same as the ones I had for the Prologue. The biggest issue being the past/present tense inconsistencies. Once again, though, these are easy fixes. Just a little more proofreading should do the trick.
Keep up the great work! I'll be back for chapter two. :)
One day I need to use that line in an email.