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It's very inspiring. I'll rate it 9/10!
So, I suggested an edit but there are a few lines I don't understand so I cannot edit them. For example:
-They talked and talked. The stars were disappeared in the firmament. When the sky was floated gold, it was time to say goodbye.
-The boy left with wind.
By the way, loved the story~ 😄
I was interested in this story, and I wanted to see where it went. The English is not bad, but not good either (needs improvement). It was admittedly a decent read for me.
There are issues, like...the ending. Was that your intention, because it just left me hanging like..."that's it?"
Overall, I'm giving this story 7/10.
EDIT: So I suggested edits. It won't fix 100% of the issues, but most are dealt with. Also, here are some things to point out:
1. When the master holds the girl out of the window, he says that "your friend is died now, come and save her."
....
She's dead. She can't be saved lol.
2. In the part when the girl finds the fallen crow prince, it says "she found the boy lied down in a red not far away".
...
What is a "red" and also, it's "she found the boy laid down"
I might have to forgive the tenses, mhm....
1. Yes.
2. Well, when you say it as "red", it makes it too vague. I wouldn't get what you mean when you say red. I thought at first it was a word that was misspelled. Calling it "blood' would make sense.
Also, I am forgiving the tenses because even I kind of don't get those at times, but since this story is written in the past tense (Makes sense, it did happen a long time ago)..
just confusing. Just why I said "forgive the tenses".
Did the sentences i change come from quotes or sentences? Because in my view, it depends on which tenses to change.
sorry, I am confused and such. ^^;