尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAziWN2fzLe
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWSvCi9F27
「妳瘋了嗎？」564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWwKsTCY8wU
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡULxpEkHeIx
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEol5Hm5k2f
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVk13jONlH
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRrUigIcR6
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFKfLJTKgm
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCEduCzG3Y
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZwqCASYtR
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqL6FbGLVPt
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5c5V55Bt8
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkcnu7Eo1Hp
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVxqkFdYGn
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZs18mokVHY
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZOWWhOLgzT
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIRyOjGzNzj
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjdgGbTDnPX
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVq8kfrLsO3
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4FqQfCpcz
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcztwZ2mYYH
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuofdybPWxF
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3TbmMp5iMw
站在樹下的人是英傑。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVGcInxbXU
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgRecB1y1Z
我跑向他，勾住他的手。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡROywXP8rN6
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡijEJP7kxGC
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMtErxNc9Y
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFilZpBFKfV
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNvYQxo2Vec
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCgBLDNGuJ
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡal3gnuKPB8
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmsr2j7Iz9
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyAUca59ov
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPirxAk8ZS5
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdG0CQwgzXM
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttJ8pm95iX
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRA1KpwS2a
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVICOjHNjak
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUBL2VjkK3v
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmWQlMeQ83
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWSRPXbyqA
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMpxqddW8HS
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZvDiFg60R
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6b74hmQ4c
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj4EVqQmozR
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI15bUdZPQn
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiafMBhJBN
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBNWT44ycpw
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5G1pvNpTOK
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbNFKzfUjg
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUX8Agnwctx
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWwJxbWmM79
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ17UuuFj3L5
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjHHeeT6HX
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyVnkyAvA6A
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKlbb69U5tO
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKgOk0ztvZ
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LIMnbM7B4
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfIKGtVkiPW
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitywnA3gRa
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡETUseeQPMZ
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9PFHdOoDw
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmPQlPFl5R
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5L3Maka2yx
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1htZGBbh1
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTQDfErvin
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDc1tIVKMH
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjdMVN37Ee
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9FUwmrVXN
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuuMLCzII6
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLIjaHXl5h
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTitufDDgE
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxV0EDve4A
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBNJCmG3lm
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTKmUIht680
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrDd5hPiGYv
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAsA6QsPDbe
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9C3Yghmtux
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39VRIuuPYr
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡihv8cU9ZFH
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSPn77bfxe
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGauRhoLu0
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpw7ax4UQE
在電視裡面。564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHMhynNOuS7
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLgGKocFL7
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJRVtZivtD
564Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmef4bN4dOc
待續。
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