尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkjD5Il6xP9
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBrQAXakf4o
「妳瘋了嗎？」535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgsrllv8nE
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD9p91CSWek
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡluORgXcJnE
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFR3mfg1eY
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2X1vtbWia1
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnrAvCzAiW
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyrBmAooCO
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9asGvSOGBy
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUCzedh3faS
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡET1566YqeS
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO3FygGHWxl
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbY8hRdolg
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1foI78Raa
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQTUqKnCrj
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpCK0hkatKb
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEuEiljydaI
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU01uWHL0ea
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbRnW2L7mU
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFiXkQCbjrJ
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbWoFNXpiGb
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgmb1f3xpxN
站在樹下的人是英傑。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZk1TvlHBVp
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusuLx5SExH
我跑向他，勾住他的手。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSWI9lrwSIt
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJa9rCchnQ9
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkO0RaSqhDy
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJUgEvL1ns
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq9dLJjzI5v
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2wnEwxIAzT
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWQ6Xh6Ub9J
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVS2TTzUgHx
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYd6K2IKkm8
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgcExWCwG4b
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYknBnYwxT
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNOPoN68Of
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKHipHYNgO
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9wC33giAY
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrXtMqrvq2A
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkMvPCNtKe
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvo48pqr1bs
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUEAY0qnHS
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBmdaUMu14T
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyMhx0LiLl
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡASOHrWwLft
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1MNhCLT51
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXloYuxKckL
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWErG1P0m0Z
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVd0cnb4FC
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ZyqGm85uM
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmnASaSiaeC
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0RCErXvsJ
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLAD6G0kIl
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuHzxaIWxi
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJTZNGwnLyq
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7NFEUx9bWi
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLfutOKCsi
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4CiJwrRZw
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxYQBbqYx2
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGalOkE3z6
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOp26XbjaXF
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhwPnVSUl7o
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJl1r9B1h1w
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQOLlRlue3
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXtSt5sfe6l
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32itHOVZgi
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm98TAPC7oQ
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGdmYmvO6o
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoVSkZxUKoH
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8866YjEq4c
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwOyBGB2SXs
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFOg3kLq79
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtu8hym6fbc
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tOKtRrCcg
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqO6h4JgRnI
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCkxWYCzh43
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Gsjjim8tG
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnU9pP9U94
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYjtUoLAbs
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohwFqNGBei
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWykb8Fdu5M
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dcb1179Uv
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlDzxZTArI6
在電視裡面。535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHn9n3hcz5x
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6Uawvu9dU
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowxbi63vP8
535Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEVB8R5IlR
待續。
ns216.73.216.30da2
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