尋死的念頭一出現,我就被自己給嚇到了。564Please respect copyright.PENANAAziWN2fzLe
564Please respect copyright.PENANAeWSvCi9F27
「妳瘋了嗎?」564Please respect copyright.PENANAWwKsTCY8wU
564Please respect copyright.PENANAULxpEkHeIx
腦裡出現兩個我,理性的那個正在發飆,狠狠咒罵另一個我。564Please respect copyright.PENANAEol5Hm5k2f
564Please respect copyright.PENANAPVk13jONlH
而被罵的那個我,只是一個勁兒地哭。564Please respect copyright.PENANAXRrUigIcR6
564Please respect copyright.PENANALFKfLJTKgm
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事,便躲進被窩,用厚厚的被子蓋住全身,連頭都包在棉被裡,不讓任何光線進來。564Please respect copyright.PENANAvCEduCzG3Y
564Please respect copyright.PENANAZZwqCASYtR
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡,我全身是汗,滿臉淚水。564Please respect copyright.PENANAqL6FbGLVPt
564Please respect copyright.PENANAY5c5V55Bt8
我側身把臉埋進枕頭,把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。564Please respect copyright.PENANAkcnu7Eo1Hp
564Please respect copyright.PENANAlVxqkFdYGn
564Please respect copyright.PENANAZs18mokVHY
我往自己的腳下看,有一片草原。564Please respect copyright.PENANAZOWWhOLgzT
564Please respect copyright.PENANAIRyOjGzNzj
面前有一條石頭道路,盡頭是顆大樹。564Please respect copyright.PENANAjdgGbTDnPX
564Please respect copyright.PENANAVq8kfrLsO3
樹下站著一個人,太遠了,我看不清他的臉。564Please respect copyright.PENANAr4FqQfCpcz
564Please respect copyright.PENANAcztwZ2mYYH
所以我走近,愈走愈近,直到我看清楚他是誰。564Please respect copyright.PENANAuofdybPWxF
564Please respect copyright.PENANA3TbmMp5iMw
站在樹下的人是英傑。564Please respect copyright.PENANAeVGcInxbXU
564Please respect copyright.PENANApgRecB1y1Z
我跑向他,勾住他的手。564Please respect copyright.PENANAROywXP8rN6
564Please respect copyright.PENANAijEJP7kxGC
他對我笑著,什麼話也沒說。564Please respect copyright.PENANAcMtErxNc9Y
564Please respect copyright.PENANAFilZpBFKfV
我像是要把這些日子以來,所有發生的事情都告訴他,開始滔滔不絕地講。564Please respect copyright.PENANANvYQxo2Vec
564Please respect copyright.PENANAWCgBLDNGuJ
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方,就停下來。564Please respect copyright.PENANAal3gnuKPB8
564Please respect copyright.PENANADmsr2j7Iz9
我還在講,他轉頭看我,伸出手揉了我的頭,就像他每次做的那樣。564Please respect copyright.PENANAfyAUca59ov
564Please respect copyright.PENANAPirxAk8ZS5
564Please respect copyright.PENANAdG0CQwgzXM
我張開眼睛,才知道自己夢見英傑了。564Please respect copyright.PENANAttJ8pm95iX
564Please respect copyright.PENANAMRA1KpwS2a
564Please respect copyright.PENANAVICOjHNjak
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。564Please respect copyright.PENANAUBL2VjkK3v
564Please respect copyright.PENANASmWQlMeQ83
是太想念英傑了,還是壓力太大需要出口?564Please respect copyright.PENANAAWSRPXbyqA
564Please respect copyright.PENANAMpxqddW8HS
或是…他真的怎麼了,才到我夢裡來?564Please respect copyright.PENANAZZvDiFg60R
564Please respect copyright.PENANAJ6b74hmQ4c
我心裡很害怕是後者,但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。564Please respect copyright.PENANAj4EVqQmozR
564Please respect copyright.PENANAI15bUdZPQn
這個夢緩解了我的情緒,也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。564Please respect copyright.PENANAIiafMBhJBN
564Please respect copyright.PENANABNWT44ycpw
不管是什麼原因,都是英傑救了我。564Please respect copyright.PENANA5G1pvNpTOK
564Please respect copyright.PENANAtbNFKzfUjg
564Please respect copyright.PENANAUX8Agnwctx
我度過了心中的那個坎,日子雖然沒有改變,但我的心態改變了。564Please respect copyright.PENANAWwJxbWmM79
564Please respect copyright.PENANA17UuuFj3L5
「沒錯,都是我選的。所以,我要更努力才行。」564Please respect copyright.PENANAAjHHeeT6HX
564Please respect copyright.PENANAyVnkyAvA6A
雖然,從那個時候開始,過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮,但我很幸運,擁有很多好朋友,如果我開口,他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我;就算我死愛面子不開口,他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢,繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。564Please respect copyright.PENANAKlbb69U5tO
564Please respect copyright.PENANANKgOk0ztvZ
高中的最後一個學期,我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學(當時已有就學貸款,但沒有考慮,只想著沒錢就去賺錢,別念書好了),但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學,硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡,要我慢慢還,要我和他們一起畢業。564Please respect copyright.PENANA7LIMnbM7B4
564Please respect copyright.PENANAfIKGtVkiPW
我沒參加考試,畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢,卻欠了好多人情債。564Please respect copyright.PENANAitywnA3gRa
564Please respect copyright.PENANAETUseeQPMZ
564Please respect copyright.PENANAS9PFHdOoDw
生活條件穩定之後,也談了戀愛,生活圈的人換了幾輪,越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。564Please respect copyright.PENANAwmPQlPFl5R
564Please respect copyright.PENANA5L3Maka2yx
我還是沒有更換手機號碼,一直抱著小小的希望,564Please respect copyright.PENANAJ1htZGBbh1
564Please respect copyright.PENANAlTQDfErvin
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。564Please respect copyright.PENANAgDc1tIVKMH
564Please respect copyright.PENANAgjdMVN37Ee
564Please respect copyright.PENANAd9FUwmrVXN
某天,我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了,找也找不到。564Please respect copyright.PENANAhuuMLCzII6
564Please respect copyright.PENANAnLIjaHXl5h
我辦了卡片掛失,心裡希望有人撿到皮夾,會願意送還給我。564Please respect copyright.PENANAMTitufDDgE
564Please respect copyright.PENANASxV0EDve4A
這時,我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片,也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。564Please respect copyright.PENANANBNJCmG3lm
564Please respect copyright.PENANATKmUIht680
564Please respect copyright.PENANArDd5hPiGYv
我的皮夾沒回來,英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。564Please respect copyright.PENANAAsA6QsPDbe
564Please respect copyright.PENANA9C3Yghmtux
有時候,我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相,便努力回想那段日子,但畫面只是越來越模糊。564Please respect copyright.PENANA39VRIuuPYr
564Please respect copyright.PENANAihv8cU9ZFH
一年、兩年、三年,當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候,我卻看見他了。564Please respect copyright.PENANAGSPn77bfxe
564Please respect copyright.PENANAbGauRhoLu0
564Please respect copyright.PENANAEpw7ax4UQE
在電視裡面。564Please respect copyright.PENANAHMhynNOuS7
564Please respect copyright.PENANAoLgGKocFL7
564Please respect copyright.PENANAxJRVtZivtD
564Please respect copyright.PENANAmef4bN4dOc
待續。
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