— No, I don't feel like it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3LX3pZmla
— But yes, it will be fun.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfkHIuoaOX
— What's the funny thing about going to school on a day when there's no class ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtJX3qP3WW
We have one of those discussions where I try to convince him to come out. This time, I set my sights on the Halloween party that the school organizes like every year on the evening of October 31st.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCt7MzpDSF
I thought about his question for a moment. How can I make him give in this time ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyFu25JSbCQ
— The classes will be emptied of their desks. There will be entertainment, sweets… a ball.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPcmNespNN
He raises an eyebrow and makes me understand that this is not a given.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGWoNY6Xms
— Do you see me dancing ? ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqmwKzoLT07
I ignore his reply and continue mischievously : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJPVULyXQI
— We will be disguised, and you can annoy everyone who criticizes you from behind. Why else do you think I would go ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCv0NW3lwA
I can see by his expression that I have a point.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUaziK3AyOC
— Hello, Megan.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq08KTbMfvI
— Hello, Elise, are you well ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FRmoURq3S
I spend so much time with Jessy that I have become very close to Mrs. Sutter. She is always happy to see me at their place and invites me to come whenever I want. I feel a bit like home there.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFTow7d48sA
— Where will you go in disguise ? Asks Elise who heard my last sentence.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vwjK68PK9
— At the high school Halloween party.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36PmTp60k8
— Good idea ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFf4tfXy2c4
With one look, Jessy glares at his mother. Mrs. Sutter places a laundry basket on the dining room table where we are and begins to fold the clothes. I grab a T-shirt and spread it on the table to help him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgbjcOaOdh
— It will do you good to go out and have fun, you stay too cooped up here ruminating.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjaEX9NLS7
— I like to be alone with my thoughts, Jessy defends, grabbing the T-shirt I’m holding in my hands.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPJNbN3f3P
— Luckily you're here, Meg, otherwise he'd never leave his room.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8qXfD7UUL
I grab another piece of clothing and start folding it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lAGvoHq4T
— Mom, stop. It’s okay, you win, I’ll go to the damn party ! But Meg, please stop worrying about my clothes ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2xw8lrAXW
I look down at the item of clothing I'm holding : it's one of his boxers. I let go immediately, but I already feel my cheeks turning red. Jessy grabs it and hides it behind his back. His face is as red as mine.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsoypdnIjbO
— Sorry… I’m… so used to doing it… at home, I said, stuttering.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVoudTrcLF9
Mrs. Sutter bursts out laughing as she watches us.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTuCe7dbDUT
— Mission accomplished, she comes to high five me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIOY36j1eBn
— What are we going to disguise ourselves as ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjnru7WwzL
— There's no way I'm going to wear a suit ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQfQ8qZbpX5
Jessy responds quickly, looking at us in turn.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9QoIIHb2s
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaf1imODMiA
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfBo7hyrz3y
The next week, we're in the main hallway of the school during break time, talking about the Halloween party. I keep trying to convince Jessy to dress up but he remains stubborn.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYfep85ol0
— I could see you as James Dean, I think out loud as I look at him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAnfNOdmW4P
— Is it because I'm going to die young like him ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaS8DBN8Nok
Immediately, I grimace.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhqs3jMOdrl
— Stop with that ! I was thinking of James because you are handsome and sexy like him but if you prefer to see the negative side...369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdemm9IVHQt
— I was joking, he smiled. Beautiful and sexy, huh ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPW4sSdm6q
I roll my eyes, smiling as my cheeks turn red. My words came out before I could hold them back. In Jessy's presence, I feel like I'm losing my composure. It is enough for him to stare at me with those beautiful green eyes for my mouth to respond without having the approval of my brain.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bINgJ3HJt
— I’m dreaming where your cheeks are all red, he mocks, pointing to my face with his index finger.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdoP1daelB
I give him a little tap on the arm which makes him burst out laughing. I love hearing this sound. I have seen him so angry, sullen, lonely, that when he laughs I am happy.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9yihBaYJR3
— At times, you remind me of my brother. You have the same dubious humor every…369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgwFqyEGujS
I leave my sentence hanging as my smile freezes when I see Amy passing near us. She gives me an icy look and completely ignores Jessy.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0yT2kXPo5c
— Why is Amy looking at you like that ? Jessy asks me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvNfzy6lDsn
I turn to him, trying to ignore my former friend. I don't want her to realize how much her attitude hurts and disappoints me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrjQpRohK1K
— I don't know. Since I'm no longer with Chad, she doesn't speak to me anymore. To think that she was my best friend... As children, we were all together often : Chad, Amy and me. And today, I feel like I've lost a part of my past.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCOyzhgXni
— People change and evolve differently over the years. She'll come back to you one of these days.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IUC9EzxXe
— You think ? I ask him, hoping he's telling the truth.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS1nrWFOAIO
— I'm sure. Who could give up a friend like you ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbq94uGC6OT
— Yeah, a friend, I breathe with annoyance while scrutinizing him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmmXv0BGl0
I would really like him to see me as something other than his friend.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOV6QCmlfkh
— And with Chad, where are you ? He questions casually.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡITbDKB7QZx
— Nowhere. We haven't spoken in several weeks. I turned the page on him. On the other hand, I continue by staring at him. There are three other boys who asked me on a date.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtzXcariAq
Am I dreaming or has his expression suddenly changed ? He lowers his face, staring at the ground as if it holds all the answers in the universe.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQO0m62Qftm
— Did you agree to go out with them ? He whispers in a strangled voice.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqATEu1aMAO
— No, I refused. You're the only guy I want to spend time with at the moment.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJBgOJFjR2
Suddenly, he lifts his face and smiles. I observe him carefully. Maybe he doesn't really see me as a friend after all. It’s enough to make me smile again.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtIJuZqaP0
— You and Chad broke up shortly after I arrived in town, but there was one thing that struck me from the few times I saw you together.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7NoVCin5oE
— Ah good ? What ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYPnejyiwL
— The distance there was between you. I mean, you were never in each other's arms or making a move to touch each other.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPR7rak7zI
— Is that what you did with your exes ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zbOdN2tVo
I scrutinize him to read his reaction which does not take long : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DBPjdq6A6
— No, but I have never been in love.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpv8HTnvQ9I
— Maybe Chad didn’t like me that much, I shrug. Or that I'm not the type of girl that guys like to hug.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWh2jhN1yhE
— Oh yes, any man would be happy to be able to hold you against him, he says without a shadow of hesitation.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5hf6pM37bf
So why don't you do it ? ! I want to ask him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuotZYL9Ur
But suspecting that this would turn him on, I just stare at him and remain silent. However, I am happy with his admission, so I continue with a smile : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXsWN4lbka
— So for Halloween, what are we dressing up as ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlOWTCehQW
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr7oE7Pi2rC
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQLuJ9Wr4a
On Friday evening, I found my parents in the living room while waiting for Jessy to arrive. I enter the room and turn around asking them : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBX0jkhks2q
— Is my dress okay ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvHqpeUIVtY
— You are very chic, admire my father.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsISdVLBM19
For the occasion, I opted for a black Charleston— style dress, and my hairstyle is adorned with a white feather. It's not my favorite outfit, but Jessy only agreed to wear a very classy suit jacket.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMiahgVHLrb
— Megan, why do you have a mask in your hand ? Nina asks.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMz7woO3cv8
— I'll put it on when I get to school. I promised Jessy that, under cover of anonymity, he could annoy the students who criticize him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZvANBtioCM
My mother laughs.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxTNpHctSo
— That’s definitely your idea ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF2G15stjhN
— It was one of the arguments to decide him to leave his house.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IzFsxaqPd
— You two spend a lot of time together, my father comments seriously.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWABMCviFE
— Yes, he’s great ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVwy1T6AlG
— You know we love Jessy, but we're worried about you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4VhFNp92o
— We are just friends.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFT99pgk5ea
— I'm not talking about that. Losing someone close to you is difficult.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHKN9rKyBO
— I know. I know that one day he may no longer be here, but if that were to happen, I would have time to prepare for it. And he's my best friend, I can't stop seeing him, that wouldn't be fair to him or me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡchZ1rLnrAM
— Are you sure it’s just friendship ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqydUMO7Ai
My father examines my face which immediately turns purple.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVxv4BnFUiM
— I preferred Chad, my sister objects, sulking.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CBMbpQNzg
Without meaning to, Nina makes me smile again and distracts my father's attention. Admitting to myself that I'm in love with Jessy is one thing, dropping this bombshell in front of my father is another. I already know the moral lesson that would await me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxN7V7fC8v
— And I find this school rule stupid which stipulates that you have to be fifteen years old to be able to attend this evening. I would have liked to go there ! She says, crossing her arms over her chest.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGBFC6KEGG9
— Then you should have asked Chad to invite you ! I said, provoking her.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrB2ofAJzFy
In response, she taps her foot on the ground while the doorbell rings.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1QThGm9us
— I go ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ842Nt02W7
I rush to open the door to Jessy. And I literally stand there glued to the spot when I see him in his black suit with a white shirt, black tie and hat. In his hand he holds a white mask similar to mine. He exudes a particular charm that disturbs me even more than usual, which is saying something.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRsbgtCJjy
After a few seconds of examining each other, he leans towards me to hang a white rose on the strap of my dress.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ168bM5FtbX
— How pretty you are, he whispered to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNWZq7VLgq9
His hands brush the skin of my shoulder and I feel myself melting. I take a deep breath to force myself to pull myself together.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHSYVCWX8P
— Isn't that okay ? He asks me, visibly worried.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkAIp5cY8zy
I can't tell him the truth. He was very clear with me when I let myself kiss him. And even though he hasn't spoken to me about it again, I still feel a burning shame. Since then I have restrained my actions and am content to be the friend he needs so much.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo91XebCPvn
— Yes, it's going very well. It’s just that it’s hot in the house and cold outside, the contrast struck me. Come on, just a minute, I'll get my coat.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9png7vQV7P
He nods and follows me to the living room where he politely greets my family as usual.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FzvH0822F
— Wow, Jessy ! This costume suits you really well ! Launches my mother.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkpXjc3Fv6
— Thank you, Mrs. Crawfords. Nina, I thought of you, I brought you a little thing to console you for not being able to come to the party.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMuH2sHJiG
He takes a rose similar to mine out of his pocket and hands it to my sister, who is speechless for a few seconds.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXUG0SkxKyI
— Thank you, Jessy, she finally said. Then looking at us, she adds : I take back everything I said earlier, it’s Jessy, my favorite ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9mr5LWcx4
We burst out laughing.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPna8jXwoCV
— Well done, Jessy, you managed to dethrone Chad ! My father is joking.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSNUGAaPGpY
— It wasn’t won though, smiled the young man. — Here we go ? I ask him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNk5KvpcUy
Jessy makes a hesitant face and answers me without much enthusiasm : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrb6FwallOV
— I would have done without it, but since I have to… let’s go ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLU0YRWRIk
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHevg5WOeE
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Two hours later, I see that Jessy is having a good evening. We took the route of anxiety : a walk in the middle of the corridors of the high school which, for the occasion, were decorated as a house of horror with skeletons suddenly appearing in front of us, vampires thirsty for blood who throw themselves on those who dare to approach them or even werewolves who run after us in the feigned hope of devouring us. There are many activities, but Jessy doesn't forget his little revenge either. When we pass a tall dark guy dressed as Dracula, whom my companion immediately recognizes as one of his persecutors, he puts on his mask, approaches slowly and manages to drop off without anyone, except me, noticing. has a large rubber tarantula on his shoulder. A moment later, we hear a scream echo through the classroom as the guy in question squirms in every direction to escape the spider. Jessy and I walk out of the room laughing until we cry.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykQ9SDBZn6
— I admit, he said to me shortly after in one of the corridors, when we caught our breath, that just for that, it was worth coming ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTVJAHHf3aC
— See, I told you we’d have fun ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOsSOZT71Q
— You were right, thank you for forcing my hand. (He takes off his mask before staring at me.) Of all the people I know, you are always there for me, no matter what. For what ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIltkuzike
He is suddenly serious.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmw0uOoSnNR
Can't you see that I'm in love with you, idiot ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLrnXAwAVuo
I want to tell him, but I hold back.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYJRpXqTAT
Instead, I answer him : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0nl7C1khow
— Why not ? You're my friend, right ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLoLWF378hZ
He nods, and his green eyes shine with a strange light.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxGSi31iWB
— Oh, Jessy, come ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAK021JInOP
Without waiting for a response, I grab him by the sleeve of his suit and force him to follow me into one of the classes that says : Come discover your future through cards.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYBfqyNkkIO
For the occasion, the room, deliberately darkened, was divided into three parts by curtains, thus constituting cabins where clairvoyants sit. We approach one of them.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACZJOMtAxq
— Can we ? I said, pointing to the seats in front of her.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWIwMYuWRD
— Of course, my children, come. Sit down.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5nrRVxvaCK
She is a small woman with brown hair, with a fairly fleshy build, who inspires confidence at first glance.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK454BJ3gtR
— Who wants to start ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsMU0iw6Iy
Jessy and I exchange a look.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEEG84rrxKj
"Iron, Meg."369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt5DaCLJjau
— OK, draw seven cards from the fan in front of you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcn1QlVane9
She turns the cards over one after the other, arranging them in a sort of large cross.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp1irhHI5Mr
— You are a nice girl, a little too serious at times, she said to me. You are always there for the people you love. This card, which designates the Empress, tells me that you are good at studies. I can assure you that you will go to university and study for a long time. A great job awaits you at the end.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhv5quc3FEe
I'm happy, studies are very important to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYhTk0xKc5i
— This card, she continues, showing me the Lover, — tells me that you are hesitating between two boys. One has the key to your heart and the other relationship is more controlled by your reason, the first boy completely capsizes you, the second rather symbolizes security.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9mh5Ei18yT
I feel myself blushing from head to toe and, silently, I thank the heavens that the room is just lit by candles. Jessy and Chad ! Only I'm not in love with Chad and I'm banking on love... I feel Jessy's gaze weighing on me, but I don't dare respond.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TFfjmDG87
— I can't tell you more, it will be up to you to choose between these two men, she places her hand on mine.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzA8n5j4uB
— Thanks.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuSaAH8bzI
— Your turn, young man, announces the woman, shuffling her cards before spreading them again on the table.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrBXRBwa3l
As I did, Jessy takes out seven cards from the deck and turns them over as she goes.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMy3VM1EtsN
— You are a kind boy, very sensitive, who has suffered a lot, but you do everything to keep it from showing. You play tough to hide your heart of gold. You are gifted in studies, but this card, it points to the Moon, leads me to believe that you are especially gifted in the arts. The drawing ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡupAzXlSz80
— I painted a lot, but I stopped for a while.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTKPgN7wPiT
— You should start again. You are an anxious boy, and this would calm you down.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAO7ChiZ5Wc
She turns over another card : the Hermit.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNPgmebQPJx
— This one tells me that you tend to run away from others. You like to be alone and, at the same time, you experience this solitude as if you were afraid of the world around you. Yet you are not alone... There is someone in your life that you love, but, for I don't know what reasons, you seem to be running away from this love that life offers you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMC1IWeleo
I see Jessy growing nervous next to me as he stares intently at the cards.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSn3lJHH5Vl
The clairvoyant turns over the penultimate card : the Nameless Arcana. Despite myself, I flinch.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlCFTGAte4
— Don't worry, the lady is reassuring, this card is scary with the skeleton reaping it represents, but it rarely means physical death. Above all, it is a sign of change in life. Your existence will be turned upside down, you will succeed in overcoming your fears to fully live your destiny.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINLegYmMU7
She turns over the last card : the World.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4WQC8YJWT
— In the coming months, you are going to be very happy young man, much more than you imagine, but for that, you must open your heart to accept the gift that is being given to you, said the clairvoyant, looking Jessie.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUigAfNCZ4
— Thank you, Madam, he stammers, visibly embarrassed.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqH1IWvoycr
— One last thing : Concerning your health, just live day to day without worrying too much. Destiny is destiny, you cannot change what will happen.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd6Redy7WIj
Jessy nods, looking serious, even though my heart is pounding. Has she just confirmed his imminent death ? His words are enigmatic to me but not to369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmS6yZy7Zk
Jessy who gets up quickly and leaves the room, I follow suit.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpD499NvHFS
— Jessy, are you okay ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbr7zAuCcCh
— Yes, very good.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ65SQV2muMe
— I'm sorry. It was a stupid idea to go see a psychic.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPstn3BlYB
He stops and turns to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3oQxYq193
— Don't worry, she told us an ending that you and I already know.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3fN6f1KVfi
— It wasn't that clear to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXe8W965HZo
— Yes, but you are always overly optimistic while I…369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrWUbxtYkP
— You are disarmingly pessimistic.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXyoOAEmqIi
My reply makes Jessy laugh.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDCbn2EEy7
— It's true. Between the two of us, we have the perfect balance.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCcCi8UrEru
I smile in turn, thinking about how we complement each other perfectly.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡthrLksiAd4
— Seriously, are you sure you’re okay ? If you want, can we go back ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirPgTNG3mc
— No, we're having fun. Come on, come on ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRahIJNs8k
He gives me a reassuring wink. For the first time, he takes my hand, which suddenly makes me feverish, and guides me towards the gymnasium which has been transformed into a ballroom. Black and orange garlands cascade from the ceiling, paper pumpkins have been installed on the tables where soft drinks are served. In the four corners of the room, plastic skeletons held by wires move like puppets. In the center of the room, students wiggle to the rhythm of a wild Rolling Stones song.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnuXf0LShyu
— You are thirsty ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaSOWkypeV
I nod with a nod. Jessy leaves me to go get two cups. I look around the room. In a corner, I see Chad dressed as a vampire, and his friends. Apparently they are the ones responsible for leading the anxiety journey. Then a tall blonde girl comes and kisses him full on the mouth. Despite her Marilyn Monroe disguise, I recognized Amy immediately. That's why she's been running away from me since we broke up, she did everything to seduce him and it worked. Chad quickly forgot me and her, that traitor ! Jessy returns with the cups. I drink mine dry.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRiRyluwDxI
— What do you have ? He asked in front of my furious face.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH0jLUBNDeW
I nod and show him Chad and Amy.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDJ4sI7zQC
— Oops, is the only sound that comes out of his mouth.
Jessy looks over to the corner where Chad and Amy are watching us, seeming to be watching for my reaction.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO3j2ZfeGrp
— Come Dance.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfHzk0L1ppn
He takes my hand again, which has the effect of calming me down immediately.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lfAhWd3u3
— I thought you didn't dance ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgrrhbKYnE
— I never said that.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWeCCk93Dk
His smile completely melts me. I let myself be guided to the dance floor. The music starts with a soft song. Like every time I'm in contact with Jessy, my heart starts racing. Without thinking, I put my arms around his neck, while he places his hands on my waist. Soon my head is resting on his shoulder. I breathe in its sweet and intoxicating scent, a mixture of flower soaps and aftershave. I feel wonderful, everything is so natural with him. But he stops abruptly. His gaze is focused on a girl, small in stature, with bobbed red hair, who turns her back to us and is chatting with friends a few steps from us.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHo8mMpmGD
Jessy doesn't take his eyes off her as I feel his shoulders tense.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvE3g7gXF3
— What is…369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeGfttPp27
The girl turns around, revealing her face to us. Jessy takes a deep breath before turning his attention back to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnFskrJ0tCt
— I need to get some fresh air, he tells me, white as a sheet.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGicEe2C3s4
We push through the crowd to the parking lot where he takes a deep breath. A cold wind rose, carrying with it the dead leaves from the trees to our feet.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsHg04ejWQe
We lean against a car.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxPUh9WIBd
— Why are you shaking ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzS6xSRVfv
I question him timidly.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSgmRCYVXr
— I don't really want to talk about it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡipoQI5wwtr
— But you are livid ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qpjDHgNFx
— I don't want to talk about it. Let's forget that, okay ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJSzTpXuLuK
— Agree as you like.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUke0cBXfG1
He raises a questioning eyebrow at my resolve. It's not like me to give up so quickly. Usually, I insist that he talks to me, but now, I'm afraid to know the truth.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeOeZFEGX1
— Shall we go back ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5a6wPt6m2
— Yeah, I think it's better after all that.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46FMkuKizb
We set off. The high school is only a few blocks from our homes.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0s2IZ4G2eR
— All that ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgiHxIydIE
— Between the clairvoyant, Chad and Amy…369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGcFKedFAf
— And your latest conquest, I tell him, not being able to contain the feeling of jealousy that has invaded me since he saw this girl.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSpO1z6X1dM
Jessy turns to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jfGGjKx6m
— It's not what you think. I thought it was Haley... The girl who gave me AIDS.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpb8GpFVnh
— Every time you talked to me about the virus, you told me you were handling it all. But after seeing your reaction tonight, I think you're handling things the wrong way. You didn't solve the problem with her. I think you should see her again, or at least talk to her.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRkW1qJOswY
— I don't see how that would help me. You know, it was just an adventure, but one that I will regret for the rest of my life... — Think about it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdG1OORd6qJ
He nods silently.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡid7M0mZ6WV
I don't add anything. It's his story, and only he knows whether he wants to look straight ahead after settling his scores, or stay immersed in a past that gnaws at him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXz4hG3Yn2
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GO0CrSnp5
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDYXMJvgWyw
The next day is Sunday; dressed in my coat, a scarf and my gloves, I leave my house, determined to face the morning cold which has suddenly fallen on the region.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ75JpFS2efl
A black car stops next to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFJ9TRSM3ZH
— Hey, a familiar voice calls out to me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMOedPxV0H
— Hi. Jessy, do you have a car ? ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfeopoVCOY
— Eh yes ! I've been talking to my mom about it for a while, and this morning she came back with it. She was so happy to see me out of the house ! You come ? I'll take you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXicowSnZ2j
He starts and, quickly, I see that he is heading towards the highway ramp.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJE7iDEQka
— Where are we going ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhiGixXxbI
— It's coming ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dDSoYP9i6
— At the cinema ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybkvCBQLrb
— Non. 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK5Qy2AERSQ
— Take a walk in the forest ? No, that's not the road. So, maybe visit a museum ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxcfQimNHN
— No. You'll see, it's a surprise, and he gives me a big, innocent smile.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxI86hwvNl
— OK, anyway, wherever it is, I'm up for it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUNEx4BmN1
— Your parents won't be worried ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKitrKTkPgV
— I told them I was going to see you. They suspect that I'm going to spend the day with you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9TCbuUSNeo
— And that's going to be the case, because we're not going very close. I don't think we'll be back until tonight.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsqVcQ2cKLQ
Still want to come ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmw1Au8g587
He gets onto the highway.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡur1tg604Lq
— Totally ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn8S0xGL1yr
— I want to show you Allentown. Today, we are going to walk in the footsteps of my past...369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuW8hGiSw1
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4EOLBlbvk
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJhIzmFP9h
After driving for almost three hours, Jessy parks in a small suburban street that seems very nice. All the houses are undoubtedly owned by wealthy people.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdGHislSmH7
— We have arrived, he declares, getting out of the car.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPdo38ZmFQ
I'm happy that he trusts me enough to show me the places that mattered to him. I get out and look at the house we are parked in front of. It is a single storey white villa with a well kept lawn. Large bay windows let the sun shine through, and a solid oak door welcomes visitors via a small path which splits the lawn into two parts.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasf0L3Lns0
— Is this where you lived ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvW0EdWbDs
Jessy has an enigmatic smile.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI7SmZRv6xi
— No, it’s not my place. We're at Haley's.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg7Cvhy8nFw
He gestures with his chin towards the beautiful house. I suddenly have a pit in my stomach.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaBhEImARSP
— What ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojQ2JcHz69
— I found her, it was very easy, actually. She told me her name and what neighborhood she lived in, a call to telephone information was enough.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNqChMvZFW
He leans back in his car, staring at the house like he can see through the walls. Little by little, his enthusiasm seems to diminish. His face turns pale...369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaaMzYe9aiz
Suddenly, Jessy comes around the car and announces to me : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRb5hwWZzTF
— Come on, let’s go.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNXBe8scjF
I remain stunned.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESYJvp5b4i
— Oh no, we didn’t come all this way to leave now. You need to go talk to him ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQeqLQCP5H
He stares at me, his face frozen.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGklFb8up7p
— I am scared.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRTH4MVQ0J
— I know, but if you don't go, you'll be left with everything that's on your heart for a long time to come. You need to move forward Jessy, you can't stay stuck with all these emotions.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSH9cgjfMM
He nods and, taking a deep breath, heads towards the house. I see him approaching the door, taking the small gravel path. I'm afraid for him. It rings and only waits a few seconds before the door opens. Jessy enters. I'm not really thrilled that he's seeing one of his ex girlfriends again. What if he fell back into her arms ? This scares me as much as imagining him screaming horrors at him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyumNmfqJRv
After all, she is HIV positive, he could perfectly well have a real relationship with her. Not just a friendship like with me. Now I'm almost wishing I was sick, my God, I'm really going crazy ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZsLciNfdx
During his absence, I also wonder about his behavior. Just the day before, when we talked about the clairvoyant's words, he repeated to me that he had nothing to offer a woman who, in any case, would quickly tire of only being able to kiss him. I managed to tell him that some relationships go beyond that. But he remained firm in his positions. Lost in my thoughts, I don't see him coming back. I jump when he opens the driver's side door and slides behind the wheel. I see right away that it's not going well. He is even paler than when he went to ring the bell, and his hands are clinging to the steering wheel as if his life depended on it. His whole body is shaking. I feel him at the end of his nerves even though he tries to control himself. I ask him half— heartedly : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfwunPvzimu
— Did it go wrong ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOE8dn61v6E
— It was his mother who opened the door to me...369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqNym1xin8M
His face expresses such hatred that I immediately think of the evening on the bridge when he was hanging above the void, screaming. I would bet that at this very moment, he would let himself fall under the wheels of vehicles rather than live another minute on this Earth. He struggles to speak, but I don't do anything to rush him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcSoGHLHjc
— Haley died five months ago.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡijyLLkz9rG
I immediately understand the dark thoughts going through his head at that precise moment.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsEDmXt4RV
— Is that all his mother told you ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡguCMgcfdaQ
— Oh no, he gets angry. She told me she is sorry that her child infected me ! She also gave me a letter that Haley wrote to me before she died. We're getting out of here ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqVMDPuMO9A
He starts off with a bang and rushes through the streets which, apparently, hold no secrets for him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQ7o94EvsG
— Jessy, please slow down a little, you’re scaring me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDbRiV3w2qZ
He doesn't respond, but I notice that he raises his foot. He drives like this for several minutes, in silence. We enter downtown Allentown. He takes the main artery then branches off several times before stopping abruptly in a small street. On either side, tall buildings block out most of the daylight. Along the buildings with their gray walls, rusty iron fire escapes make the place even more sinister.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2iYNlfKqb
Jessy gets out of the car and slams the door. I'm. I am so afraid that he will try to end his life. He walks to the center of the street, where metal garbage containers are piled up, and hits them with all his might several times.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZpRDYYT3I
— Jessy, please calm down, I’m begging you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahpy72MW7d
— For what ? Can you tell me what all this is for ? What's the point of living ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eqypRXcPt
— Stopped. (I place myself between him and the trash can on which he pours all his anger.) You are alive ! You hear me ? Are you still alive ! And by the time the disease breaks out, perhaps doctors will have found a treatment. But the force you put into hitting this container, you have to put into fighting yourself.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1cL8gCsul
— But why ? What is keeping me on this planet ? Don't you understand that I'm going to end up like Haley ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxzSQEzivKx
He pushes me away with one arm before knocking again.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLV7jRqviW
Soon his fist is bloody.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eS6Q79rVN
— But why are you hitting this trash can ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ81ERhkB7U1
— Because I'm angry, and even then, angry is an understatement for what I feel.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjouDYWo6u1
— For what ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCECzD9Gri
He, usually so secretive, finally decides to confide in me while now kicking the poor trash can.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9az1J7HaGU
— This is the place where my life changed, he said to me, out of breath.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡASPfYjLkfJ
He stops knocking and points to a spot near the right wall, a little further away.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9QVhJZLm0
— Do you see there ? This is the place where my father, my real father, died. He was killed by a local gang who wanted to steal his money, they dragged him here before shooting him. When I was little, I was terrified of losing my parents. I don’t know where this anxiety came from, it was unreasonable, it woke me up at night. My father reassured me, constantly telling me that he would always be there to protect me, and when I was five, suddenly, he was no longer there. He let me down. He didn't protect me ! Things would have been very different if he were still here. And now Haley is gone ! And it pisses me off because, even if it’s wrong, I would have liked to scream at him with all the rage I have in my heart ! And all I have instead is this damn letter ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOCR3kFjo7c
He takes the missive out of his coat pocket and shakes it in the air, as if he wants to get rid of it but is unable to.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeVgwueX8h
— I understand that well ! But when you calm down, you will want to know what she had to say to you. Your father didn't get to say goodbye to you, Haley did it through these words in this envelope.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEX0TCfpQGH
My voice is choked with sadness. Jessy looks at me, searching in my eyes for the reason for my sudden emotion.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXQwOJUpMyl
— You’re right, he whispers, looking at the letter still in his hand. I must not condemn her, she was not the only one responsible for what happened that evening, he said more calmly.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpinL8I9zP3
— It's true. She didn't know she was sick at the time. But on the other hand, I can't help but feel relieved that you didn't see her again. I know, it’s awful to think that ! 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfOxpm6NBg
I turn away, I don't dare look at him anymore. I just told him about the fear that filled me the first time he mentioned Haley. Even though she infected him, he had a history with her, he was closer to her than he will ever be to me, and it breaks my heart to admit that.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGvOOaThaF
Jessy stands in front of me and examines my face.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEUD1zfpdG
— Why do you feel relieved ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyVcdPfrKI
There is no longer any trace of anger in his voice, just curiosity.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIjiG4fMZkA
— For nothing, forget it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvtTFgXe9N
— Yes, tell me, he breathes softly. I hesitate, watching his piercing gaze.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl2K7trYMU1
— Because I was afraid you would get back together with her.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWr1eeIBnkt
He looks at me, incredulous.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8CbTnuQOZ
— I know..., I continue but I quickly interrupt myself, no longer knowing how to continue without admitting my feelings.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMl3NejYGjV
Jessy stares at me for a moment that seems to last forever.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Lsu47nl2I
— When you were with Chad, I said to myself : "Nothing will ever happen between us while he can do anything for her. "369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpIJc5R4j0L
I remain in shock, did he just tell me that he is dying to be with me or was I dreaming ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ019qrCRoNY
— I'm not going back with Chad.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡig5QN0th1F
— It's true ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDVBQjfCuWH
I nod, grabbing the lapel of his coat.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBssIoZYBWa
— Chad has never been an obstacle between us. He's not the one I want to be with.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2azsH2nP8r
He wipes his forehead where beads of sweat appear and looks at his damaged hand.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DenemzFqy
— Actually, I mainly thought that it would scare you to be with me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuBm9D8CcV
— Maybe you should have asked me ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXdPfq8O2z
I fiddle with a button on his coat.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZBFOupNYnb
— It's true.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadgECK23yP
He purses his lips and says : 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJRTV5GAVd
— Do you want to go out with me ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqoPUmhp0sf
Finally you decide ! I smile. Of course I want to be with you, that’s all I’ve thought about since we met.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuGMSeLsKZ
Jessy gives me a big smile.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNb6utZMS4b
— I don't know how long I'll stay alive.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsNkRu52dKE
— We'll see. We're going to make every day count.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONOFaznf9V
— And with Chad, is it definitely over ? Are you sure ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQqWokoBhQ
— Jessy, Chad and I broke up because you came into my life and offered another horizon to my future. When I met you, I realized I never really loved him. He's just a friend. That’s the real reason… At least for me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnUSHeC6cjF
I hand him some tissues which he wraps around his scratched hand, which has already stopped bleeding. Then he puts his arm around my shoulders, kisses my forehead and leads me towards the car, putting the letter in his coat pocket.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyBrIbdbd2C
— I suspected that I was somewhat responsible for this story, he said, winking at me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjxw559Kxm
Suddenly, he hands me the car keys.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FN7zIP3kr
— I don't feel like driving after all this, would you like it ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKbSnusgSJ
Too happy to be able to get behind the wheel, I eagerly grab the keys.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4WVy6MuXLx
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmxNdNHHXxF
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGRbb5qMY4
We enter Millisky, the town is deserted at this hour, only the street lights give a semblance of life to the streets. I glance at Jessy, lost in thought. Suddenly, instead of heading towards his house, I change direction and head towards the hill. I can't let him go home like this. Having reached the top, I stop the car. Jessy snaps out of his thoughts and looks around, surprised. He doesn't know this corner of the city where I myself rarely go.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRyNfmuRlTp
— Where are we ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyfLWWwAzoH
— Come with me.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAMzXdRuyQ
We are on a small dirt road bordered by a security fence. Tall grass protrudes from the slope overlooking the town. Jessy joins me in front of the car, I take his hand and lead him past one of the sumptuous mansions, which offers a perfect view of the sleeping city.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6KcnT5QqJ
— I know you’re not in good spirits and I understand perfectly why, I assure him. I also know that you're waiting until you're alone to read Haley's letter. But I'm not going to let you do it, I don't want you to be upset, alone, in your corner while I'm worrying about you. Please, Jessy, do this for me. I'm not asking you to read it, I just want you to read it in my presence because whatever you think about it, you're going to need support afterwards and I want to be the one to hug you to make sure that everything will be alright.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRrR7aHPHNf
With tears in his eyes, he nods.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhtS2peJgCQ
I move a few steps away to give him his privacy. He takes out the envelope, hesitates for a few seconds then opens it. From the first words he reads, I perceive the change in his expression, he seems to be decomposing. Quickly, I see tears rolling down his cheeks while I hold myself back from going to join him because I feel so bad for him. A few seconds later, he stops reading, leans over to lean on the safety barrier as a loud sob escapes him. I can no longer resist and will hug him. My arms are around his neck, my face on his shoulder.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZhBBMgAvu0
I'm here, Jessy, I'm here, I whisper in his ear.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMQcSCblru
He stands up, turns around and hugs me as if I were the only thing holding him back on earth.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWM2gVP1pO
— Here, he said, handing me the letter.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhxXeDk8Bfa
— No, it’s meant for you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7N7fNzI391
— I don't want to hide anything from you about Haley, not after what you admitted to me earlier.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cG7mPk1d6
Although it bothers me, I grab the paper.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IkBdcd1u1
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wt6LzlKig
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1qbwLPzUuN
Jessy, 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MIVwfLwmb
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvoqDYDnyj
If you are reading this it is because I will no longer be here to speak to you in person. It’s also that you are looking for answers to your questions, explanations. I will try to answer it.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFJoupESEi
First of all, I wanted to tell you that I am deeply sorry for having infected you. If I had known that I was carrying this virus, I would never have hit on you that evening. As I told you during that famous evening, I wasn't looking for anything serious, yet when I saw you, I liked you straight away. If I left so quickly once we slept together, it was because I could have had feelings for you and coming out of a difficult relationship, I didn't want that.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9YntoZh3y
If you are wondering how I became HIV positive, it was precisely this ex that I had such a hard time forgetting who infected me after cheating on me. He didn't know he was sick either.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FauHpOX2e
As I write these words to you, I am in the hospital. I don't think I'll get through it. I'm not telling you this to inspire pity, but to tell you that I pray that you never experience the same thing. I sincerely hope that medicine finds a cure before the virus manifests itself. In no case did I want to condemn you to live in this hell, neither you nor the two other boys whom I also infected.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hah1PMfht
I'm going to leave consumed with guilt. I pray that God forgives me, that you will be able to forgive me one day.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4SFAdpYgem
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl6J0KwqFBD
Haley 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvHXfz3pM3g
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHfEHFJmEwa
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8pmiqbnFES
These words upset me because they seem so sincere to me. I turn to Jessy who has wiped his eyes but still seems disturbed.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAohcG5s7Li
— How are you feeling ? I ask him.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOiWSLcRWoy
— Sad and relieved at the same time. In fact, I feel like life will never give me any gifts and that every one of my hopes will be disappointed.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPFfgXbtxVH
— You are wrong, Jessy. You see that ? I point to Millisky lit up in front of us. This is your life today. It is no longer a dark alley in Allentown, nor even a state of the art residence in which many misfortunes hide. No, your life is here now. As for your future, I don't know what it will be like, just as I don't know my future, but there is one thing I am certain of : I will be with you.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkfZqBg5ZA
He leans towards me, I kiss him full on the mouth. This time he kisses me back forcefully. His body presses against mine, making me shiver. From my lips, he lets his mouth slide slowly down to my neck. I savor this kiss, this desire that pushes me to want him ever closer to me. Then he takes my mouth again with a mixture of tenderness and eagerness. With the tip of his tongue, he parts my lips, his tongue caresses mine while he sucks in my breath. No boy, no even Chad has never kissed me like that. I feel faint in his arms, my legs have difficulty supporting me. He moves slightly away from me, staring at me. I can read in his eyes that I won this first battle, he regained faith in life, in my love for him. For the first time since I've known him, he's happy.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQBZ52Oufwx
Behind us, in the house, the group Divinyls can be heard with their songI’m on your side. 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJvdb5wDQ6
— Miss Crawfords, will you give me this dance ? 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE4Yurfgmz1
He holds out his hand to me. 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0g8yCPAp1
— With pleasure.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ802CUMIAWy
« I’m on your side 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLg7Vom8Ta
You know I’m not the enemy. » 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ODV15BQ9M
It's not hot tonight, but sheltered in Jessy's arms, I'm not cold.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK998sFoiKt
« I love you, babe » rises in the silence of the night.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHKw2pqUgx
Jessy moves back a few inches and looks at me with a mischievous smile.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3XcxSvMAv
— So in the end, who won ? The heart or the reason ? He asks me, quoting the words of the clairvoyant.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrC8YY0sthB
– You are the heart, you always have been, I answer him forcefully.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiw3jJamOdV
« I’ll hold on to you. » 369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKccRIgcmN
This is how, snuggled in each other’s arms, the music rocks us.369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQxayBiCfM
« I love you babe, I love you babe, I’m on your side. »369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhePwFDauTV
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