「你今個星期日有沒有時間來我家?」張雅己在訊息裡說。96Please respect copyright.PENANArWpTXvwOa9
96Please respect copyright.PENANAIlSCthZf5X
「為什麼?」我吃驚地問。96Please respect copyright.PENANAc4PvmbdOH1
96Please respect copyright.PENANAjt1yrEec2R
「不是你說我們要在學校保持距離嗎?我想跟你繼續討論,你不願意的話,要不我到你家去。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAJZhudermIS
96Please respect copyright.PENANAyuN8gP8NYb
「不,不,還是我到你家吧。」我手忙腳亂,不知所措。96Please respect copyright.PENANA40QPmYTZKV
96Please respect copyright.PENANAQKiTgzBWaP
「可以帶薛丁格一起嗎?我想看看牠。」96Please respect copyright.PENANACGHEH8hrMb
2008年12月7日星期日,96Please respect copyright.PENANAzgXkS07mJj
我背著裝住薛丁格的貓背囊,來到張雅己的家門前。96Please respect copyright.PENANAxN7AhtTzBN
96Please respect copyright.PENANAaO2mIx68rx
緊張的按下門鐘,出來應門的是張雅己的母親,她很有禮貌地向我打招呼。96Please respect copyright.PENANA0pQDjkufdC
96Please respect copyright.PENANA2oSycjydRf
「雅己很少帶朋友回家的,特別是男孩子。」她笑咪咪,邀請我進屋,後面傳來張雅己的聲音。96Please respect copyright.PENANA2pbvQG9Gj8
96Please respect copyright.PENANAL2ESYQcgzn
「你到了,快些進來吧。」張雅己催促我進去她房間。96Please respect copyright.PENANAgDkZsfmIKN
96Please respect copyright.PENANAuL3XXQCQ6O
「要不要喝果汁?要不要吃零食?雪櫃裡有蛋糕。」96Please respect copyright.PENANA2RF6yO1SXy
96Please respect copyright.PENANAbPDE00n018
她媽媽繼續在我們身後說著客氣話,直至張雅己用力關上房門。96Please respect copyright.PENANABNUkzlDKc2
96Please respect copyright.PENANAt6tgApaAGT
她房間裡比我想像還要整潔,而且香。96Please respect copyright.PENANAo4tKkimEPN
96Please respect copyright.PENANAm12rWlUKej
最重要是我第一次看見張雅己穿便服的樣子。96Please respect copyright.PENANAqTlVPNL1eK
96Please respect copyright.PENANAG6BdsonUIv
我從背囊捧出薛丁格,牠不太熟悉周圍環境,在地板上縮成一團,張雅己抱起牠。96Please respect copyright.PENANAx2t4yHglon
96Please respect copyright.PENANAqkYKDt0BTE
「為什麼你主人會改你叫薛丁格這種古怪名字,他到底在想什麼。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAZLGvZDAkuI
96Please respect copyright.PENANAOzShDEx9n9
她用比平時更可愛,像小朋友的說話方式,對著牠說。96Please respect copyright.PENANApJdV8HJvC0
96Please respect copyright.PENANABMZjhQylsR
「牠好像比我第一次見牠時健康了。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAIyKnDS3326
96Please respect copyright.PENANAa1tGUn65vu
「還胖了很多,我父母每天也買貴價貓糧給牠,快要寵壞牠。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAxLLlbHlW2m
96Please respect copyright.PENANAbBXJIkWWV0
「真好,我很羨慕你有幸福的家庭。」她說。96Please respect copyright.PENANAjICa5XUqB6
96Please respect copyright.PENANAYlVXsbcLHi
我腦裡閃過在警署時,她母親那哀傷的神情。96Please respect copyright.PENANA2lmQjRa3uy
薛丁格掙扎著從她手中逃開了。96Please respect copyright.PENANAAM60AhOmJQ
96Please respect copyright.PENANA2N2aVEbsvw
她不知哪裡找來一個貓玩具,高大的她趴在地上,一直逗著薛丁格玩。96Please respect copyright.PENANAC8yB4iJj73
96Please respect copyright.PENANAZDgL2ATUyR
「我把之前說的那套電影帶了過來,或者有參考的地方,你有dvd播放器嗎?」我問。96Please respect copyright.PENANAOnp1zGkGUO
96Please respect copyright.PENANAq4GjUAPtt0
「可以用電腦。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAFLgCIVbL2w
96Please respect copyright.PENANALy5FRK0LtI
我們坐在地板上,靠著她的床,電腦螢幕很細,我們必須擠在一起看,肩碰肩。96Please respect copyright.PENANAVYXXTz3BKJ
96Please respect copyright.PENANA1JOuQifNgm
若撇除了我坐在這裡的原因,是為調查她是誰的幻想,還有她是個自殺了5次還死不去的女生,我們現在這個模樣,不過是兩個平常少年少女坐在一起看電影然而。96Please respect copyright.PENANAaLWnwXQnmQ
96Please respect copyright.PENANAxhaaUf8PxK
薛丁格走過來鑽進她膀胳,她溫柔的抱牠入懷,在牠脖子的毛皮上親吻。96Please respect copyright.PENANAGhmpDaacHU
96Please respect copyright.PENANA8wUrHa3S9S
我想她的吻該是甜蜜又溫暖。96Please respect copyright.PENANAJFu8i7e6Gv
「沒有人希望自己死去,不幸地我們都難逃一劫。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAJmRtk1r6Lm
96Please respect copyright.PENANAFP8CuVzDnS
「終有一天,你會死。可能在銀行心臟病發、可能被薄荷珠嗆死、或者在你度假時罹患不治之症。你會死,你必定會死,即使你逃避了這次,也有其他原因導致你的死亡,而且我可以保證不會像她寫的那樣有詩意和充滿意義。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAhaQ5ONdmw1
96Please respect copyright.PENANAIuffxhDKdZ
戲中其中一個角色對男主角說。96Please respect copyright.PENANA9qsZW0wlU8
96Please respect copyright.PENANAhnFyfAmiCv
我偷望身邊的她,她看得入神,我看到她眼紅紅鼻子也紅紅,一顆眼淚隨她眼睛輕眨,滑落到她的面頰。96Please respect copyright.PENANAaVgpLO7z1A
96Please respect copyright.PENANAzhvhyV9g2Z
我不敢哼出半點聲音,不自覺減輕呼吸,假裝沒有發現她在哭。96Please respect copyright.PENANAVAGauILxOw
96Please respect copyright.PENANA34id0VYApy
電影完結,她立刻站起來背著我,我知道她正用手擦拭眼淚。96Please respect copyright.PENANAf3XOKVfVS2
「電影很好看。」張雅己咽哽著。96Please respect copyright.PENANA6OsQs6o53f
96Please respect copyright.PENANA9iQA7uMlAl
「嗯,但好像沒有什麼值得參考的地方。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAYFWM3QGqfY
96Please respect copyright.PENANA562AUpQnVq
我看著她的背影,終於按奈不住,鼓起勇氣問我一直想知道的問題。96Please respect copyright.PENANAm3Vtl9pZLc
96Please respect copyright.PENANAiYnDzNlyUA
「你可以告訴我你自殺的理由嗎?」96Please respect copyright.PENANARS7SWU1pO2
96Please respect copyright.PENANAnuORGCxciU
她沒有回答,依然站在原地背向著我,我聽到她因為哭過,急促的氣喘聲。96Please respect copyright.PENANAzjJWR2H6v7
96Please respect copyright.PENANAMlFmGLlOQn
「我不想說。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAmLRNFTrpm3
96Please respect copyright.PENANAXL1bq0Mgm7
「可能是其中一個線索⋯⋯」96Please respect copyright.PENANAN6Gdsi1zbC
96Please respect copyright.PENANAvNyqZtg5Sx
「我不想說。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAi8RVGbgXlH
96Please respect copyright.PENANA4U5S4zZhIk
「可能對事情會有幫肋⋯⋯」96Please respect copyright.PENANAFN0FXuuuQ9
96Please respect copyright.PENANASq9igcBpnx
「我說了我不想說!」96Please respect copyright.PENANA6xwCcQ0sT4
96Please respect copyright.PENANArNeOEb0MpD
我第一次聽到張雅己這麼大聲說話,房間裡像迴盪住她的聲音。96Please respect copyright.PENANAqEniomnoHV
96Please respect copyright.PENANAXWhQkHV7XT
薛丁格嚇壞了,躲在我腳邊,我抱起牠,把牠放進貓背囊。96Please respect copyright.PENANAeWQ773nGoh
96Please respect copyright.PENANAgx7dYr3VFK
「對不起,我想我該離開了。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAlFNosscv4r
96Please respect copyright.PENANA6cqYhGpKP2
我轉身開門離去,張雅己也沒有回頭,我看到她的背影在微微顫抖。96Please respect copyright.PENANAq63GfQNnd6
張雅己的媽媽在門外聽到她大聲說話,以為我們吵架。96Please respect copyright.PENANAsTr3KjoHOw
96Please respect copyright.PENANAi6O0fp0EBD
「對不起。」她不知為何,跟我道歉起上來。96Please respect copyright.PENANAXO15x3js02
96Please respect copyright.PENANAa1SkL1O6R0
「不,是我不好。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAdqxAoFcIlO
96Please respect copyright.PENANA8XUiTfJn0t
「她小時候,是一個很乖很親切的小孩。自從她爸爸過世後,我就不太懂她在想什麼。」96Please respect copyright.PENANA4deF4PU9mh
96Please respect copyright.PENANASiqirSdaaw
她看著客廳牆上的照片說。96Please respect copyright.PENANA1cGOJ3FMdd
96Please respect copyright.PENANABJhi6tgLQC
「如果她爸爸還在這裡就好。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAgGE1ajALKC
96Please respect copyright.PENANAqfqvUjph2l
我走近,想看看張雅己的爸爸。96Please respect copyright.PENANAVHNzkupd1U
96Please respect copyright.PENANAcoIjixSdGj
那是一張家庭合照,她媽媽年輕時更像張雅己。她抱住還是嬰兒的張雅己,坐在沙發上,旁邊站了一個高大的男人,應是她爸爸。96Please respect copyright.PENANAYJhyjGx0aF
96Please respect copyright.PENANAJ2iXN0xBLM
「不好意思,我可以問張雅己的爸爸是何時過生嗎?」96Please respect copyright.PENANAKMqPDM5MYO
96Please respect copyright.PENANAAViCCLHHYW
「嗯,是張雅己4歲的時候。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAREJbTUFiLu
96Please respect copyright.PENANAgAEVXQi9wE
家庭合照的右上方,貼了另一張照片,大概是她爸爸年輕時跟朋友登山的合照。照片中有4人,前排是兩個女生跪在地上,高大的張雅己爸爸則站在後面,親蜜地用手搭著身邊另一個男人的肩膀。96Please respect copyright.PENANAsOJIenqpAD
96Please respect copyright.PENANAlJT6oeSn9o
「這張照片是?」96Please respect copyright.PENANA1B4d9dEXpB
96Please respect copyright.PENANAhCCjvO2Hwj
「那是她爸爸大學時期參加登山社拍的,我們當時還未認識對方。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAbfs6jADRfk
96Please respect copyright.PENANA2ytvsBWM5a
我總覺得她爸爸身邊的那個男人很眼熟,好像在哪裡見過他。96Please respect copyright.PENANAGRa8E2yNLU
96Please respect copyright.PENANAmiaeMkoDpv
這時候,廚房的水壺響起來。96Please respect copyright.PENANATsTjmg92OJ
96Please respect copyright.PENANAc8AD0u6cuC
我趁著張雅己媽媽跑到廚房關火,趕快用手機拍下家庭合照和那張登山照,然後匆匆離開了。96Please respect copyright.PENANAJJBlRYDOnX
「對不起,我不應該發脾氣⋯⋯」她訊息裡說。96Please respect copyright.PENANAc0GAXYGZq2
96Please respect copyright.PENANA7zdIUdiDEc
「不,是我不對,我明白你不想說,我不應該追問。」96Please respect copyright.PENANAwviH1FLX7Q
我回覆。
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