I'm a horrible person.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tP4DqNIhK
Anti-hero, my ass. If I was a person reading this, I'd think that anyone who'd support the writer of this diary would be crazy. Despicable.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJlqhUfNEQ
After all, I've ruined many lives. Broken up families. Hurt an unfathomable amount of people. There are even people that have taken their lives as a result of my actions.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dbbXmUbJO
But I don't feel anything for them.
It was fun at first, you know.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHECxFnlyj
It's nerve-wracking. Exhilarating. The echoes of screaming. Distorted faces.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ23H1QO44Dv
Projecting the faces of people I know onto the victims.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJftBC6kfTT
Seeing people beg for mercy. A power trip, you might call it.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIl7wrfP2n8
Have you ever had someone at your complete mercy? With their body under your foot, telling you to spare them at any cost. They would do anything.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GB1AKk0A3
Feeling your fist connect with someone's gut. A crowd of people watching you, yet powerless to do anything.
It was my life. I would spend most, if not all of my spare time planning how I would be able to rise up the ranks. Get more media on me. My character.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3QW5TM6ehO
I can't help but grin when I overhear people talking about me in person.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz0sVhhTZkv
When I read the comments under compilations of my appearances.
But it's tiring.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8Kb6GKBXu
The constant hate. The fear of being watched. The fear of being discovered.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHbVSgIf0n
I don't usually say much, but when we're talking about something I'm passionate about, I won't stop.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwbFkQ6hBin
Naturally, I'm grateful they put a curse on me so that I don't accidentally blabber confidential information about villains.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtHWxHNkWZ
But as heroes and villains are common topics of discussion, it's easy for me to get carried away. And after that happens, the anxiety hits.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJRRbx75Z2d
What if they figured out my identity? What if they realise how despicable I am?529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuUeXOjvje
I can't talk to them again. It's too dangerous.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJ5Beq6R2u
Call it an irrational fear, but I can't help it.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTO6MsnkX8M
Sometimes I wonder why they picked me when I knew what I was doing was wrong. Well, I guess it's better than those who flaunt their crimes.
And gradually, I numbed myself to humanity.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rITN5e6Ej
Those aren't humans. They're disgusting lumps of meat. They don't have a will of their own. Look, how they're squirming beneath my feet, promising to disown their children in order to stay alive. How one leaps in front of the other to finally die and be remembered as a hero despite living a life that can only be described as trash beforehand.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKeEzBwv7i
If I hated humans before, I came to despise them with all my being.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUecvxpKn5q
Hope for humanity? Don't be ridiculous. Heroes don't exist. They're just garbage, like you and me, parading as luxury goods, made to capitalise and give false hope.
I'm tired of all this. Of being reminded of how revolting humans are.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvWAF0g86e
Of being lonely.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0k1m78Gos
Pathetic, right? Even though I think like this, I'm lonely. It's not something I'd like to admit. I'm always alone, so you'd think I'd be accustomed to it. And in most cases, I prefer to be alone. But I can't help but feel lonely sometimes.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PKqCwO7FJ
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So I take comfort in my own world.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyQo7zdq8r
If the Organisation doesn't want me, then no one would want me.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtt8G5yvSgf
I joined hoping that I'd be of some help to society despite being a loser, only to lose what little faith I had left in the world.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4ZJvNtQT7
Truly, I deserve to be called a villain in all aspects.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SPRLKxRNx
I hope you're happy. I hope the heroes are happy. I hope the higher-ups are happy.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2cJqP4lWC
Or maybe I hope that the world ends tomorrow and we all get what we deserve.
The power of friendship, the happy life that's always being portrayed in mainstream media doesn't exist. It's all lies.
I tried, you know. I tried hard. I had perfect attendance in school. I did well in tests. In sports. But why? Why can't I bring myself to try hard for anything now? All that's left for me is to be the villain. With no one on my side my whole life.
You don't need to pity me. The families I've ruined sure don't.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRSeEGmKlo6
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I can't keep doing this forever. I'll have my memories erased, and then what? I'll just keep being unwanted. I'll barely pass my studies. Get a mediocre job that I despise. A quiet life that made no impact. I was raised to be "special", but I'm not even special to one person.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UP8Bu86sO
Why does a part of me keep screaming to be recognised?529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVl09RMrIiI
If only I could have been more dedicated. If only I could work harder. If only I had a dream.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwhIXe4vSen
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What would it be like as a hero? To have people not looking up to me from beneath my feet, but from respect and admiration? To have cheers whenever you walk by instead of when you're defeated and humiliated? But I can't even handle the expectations of my parents, much less the expectations of the whole public.
I can't even be a proper villain. A villain wouldn't have thoughts like these, right? They wouldn't even be writing something like this in the first place.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBI9rffmGKJ
I can't be a normal human being. I can't be a hero nor a villain.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Ol6gYdssz
I shouldn't even have been born.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6sU3Lj5A2i
The Organisation didn't even need to pick me; surely there are so many people out there who're better at being the villain than me.
Ah, well, whatever. It doesn't matter anyway.529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxjC2YH5ei
....529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Rb8VdoWjg
[Deleted passage]529Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBX0iso1cps
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