Three years.
Three years with Nova Rae Blackwell—the only woman I ever wanted to be something better for.
The one girl who made me want to slow down, fix the broken parts, be a man worth holding onto.
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But man, the pressure?
It’s like carrying a weight made of glass.
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Every day, I try to be perfect for her—perfect in the way she deserves.
Not the angry, broken guy she met.
The guy who snaps, who pushes, who’s got all these scars she never asked to see.
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But the harder I try, the more it feels like I’m just digging myself deeper.
Like there’s this voice in my head whispering: You’ll never be enough.
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I started lying to her.
Little lies at first—late nights at work, meetings that never happened.
Then the big ones.
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The first time coke touched my lips, it felt like control. Like a way to silence the noise inside my head—the expectations, the fear, the self-doubt.
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It was a mistake.
A dark, twisting mistake.
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But the harder I fought, the more I fell.
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And the cheating… God, the cheating was worse.
Not because I didn’t love Nova—because I do. More than anything.
But because I was broken, and I didn’t know how to say it.
So I ran.
Ran into someone who didn’t know the weight I carried.
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The nights I came home late, smelling like sin and regret, I watched her from across the room.
Trying to convince myself she’d never see the cracks forming in the man I was supposed to be.
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She deserved better.
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I deserved better.
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But right now?
I’m just a man lost in the chaos of trying to hold it all together.
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And I’m scared that when the truth comes out—when she finally sees what I’ve done—it’ll all be gone.
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The love.
The trust.
The us.
She walked in too quiet.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtK35cmjwFi
Too steady.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOF7erhTjtU
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Nova’s never been the silent type—unless she’s loading a bullet behind her eyes.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzucJd64AX6
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She didn’t sit. Didn’t yell.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQNQDX67aO
Just stood there in front of me, her jaw locked like she was keeping herself from screaming.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRn2yWauiI
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She placed her phone on the table between us, screen-down.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡysSEyeMGN4
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“You been cheating on me, Saint?”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8G96GXsFu
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I leaned back on the couch, like that could put space between me and what I already knew was coming.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBjAt84Ppi
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“What?” I let out a low laugh. “Nova, c’mon. You really believe that?”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8gxSRsHOS
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She didn’t blink.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVprbdlJHK
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“Tell me again.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uV7EEl6m9
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“I’m not cheating. You’re being insecure.” I shrugged. “You overthink everything, and now you’re dragging this sh*t up outta nowhere.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9U1ez2h0v
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She slid the phone across the table and tapped the screen.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNAuInsIe3
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“Play that.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEe49z1PI5H
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I hesitated.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpvYduxylv
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“Play. It.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqrCEEBgPg
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I picked it up. Tapped the audio file.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBI05g3VYS
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And there it was—my voice. Clear as day.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSvhxzaVnvc
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“She’s wild, but I like it. Keeps things interesting. Like, she’s beautiful, sure—but it’s the chaos that makes it exciting.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhme72XG5Il
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Then laughter.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3NJWHInFY
A woman’s voice, smug and flirty.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOk8bNrAToU
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“So you stay with her ‘cause she’s crazy?”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRct2D9SNkK
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And me again.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOT198FTt1
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“She needs me. That’s the thing. Girls like her always crash eventually—and I’ll be the one she runs back to.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbv0vvbR2Tu
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I locked eyes with Nova. My heart hit the floor.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowkUOFGWJ5
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“It wasn’t like that,” I started, throat dry.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuEq7pBtb3
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“No?” she asked, voice shaking. “Then what was it like, Saint?”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcKEZLSwSlA
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“I was just… talking. Trying to get her to leave me alone. You know how people twist things—”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPz8rSP91VM
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“Those were your exact words. I didn’t twist a damn thing.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1JcPjStD4
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I stood, hands clenched. “You’re overreacting—”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjx2gXol7V1
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“No, I’m reacting exactly how I should.” Her voice cut like glass. “You let another woman lie next to you and feed off pieces of me—our relationship. You didn’t just cheat. You degraded me.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡijSCjwpsvB
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I stepped closer. “Nova, please. You know that’s not what I meant—”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRv2HnVv3u
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“But it’s what you said.” Her eyes were glassy, but not from tears—just restrained fire.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2TOofStMuy
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“You called me wild. Broken. Chaotic.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5L3JQQgMfR
She paused. “And you said you liked it. Like I was some kind of pet project that makes you feel alive when your own soul is dead.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9NFeiRq8Vv
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I shook my head, heat rising to my ears. “I messed up. I know that. But you don’t get to paint me as a villain for one slip-up—”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKAzMnrBHAj
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“Slip-up?” she whispered, stepping in close.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3FH9od8ZJ
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“You don’t get to tell the world I’m a beautiful disaster and expect me to still hold you like you’re my peace.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXZXZe4NIQW
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“I love you, Nova.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWNxZRdecB
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She flinched. Just a little. Then:48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsRQZpuSh0l
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“No. You love the control. You love the idea of me needing you.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlOnqmCk07M
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I reached for her wrist. She pulled away.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT95JqcxzQY
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“I loved you like you were oxygen. You loved me like I was fire—you liked the burn, but never wanted to get too close.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv8mukxHBn5
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The silence hit harder than any slap.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftwhAtZTH4
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She turned to leave, but stopped at the door.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlbhJBtnmCT
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“Next time you lie to someone about me, Saint—make sure they don’t record it.”48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5GED3EZN6
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Door slammed.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMWfrsAKsx
And I was left with her voice echoing in my head.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfc4AzyDh3
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Not the one on the tape.48Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7POIIH1owR
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The one that finally decided she was done.
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