這種劇情發展怎麼跟日本毒撚動漫十分相似，突然有個陌生女子在家中出現，然後同居。這種既異想天開又陳腔濫調的劇情，連我在講故台看到都會唾棄。若是毒撚甚至是一般男生絕對會點首答允，這樁美事發生十個男生九個都嚮往，剩下一個應該是同性戀。不好意思，我是第十一個。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDX7smFK9o
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作為一名A0毒撚當然想盡快交女朋友擺脫這個稱號，但論到同居我絕不同意。先撇開她是一個不知從何而來的陌生人，與女生同居這種事沒你想像中那麼美好。為何我知道?全因我之前與家姐同住十幾年，徹底了解與女生這種生物在同一屋簷下是甚麼狀況。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHbB1VzJY7
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2pN2RpPRnk
女生與你老媽不同，她們不是照顧你忍讓你的角色，早上搶洗手間，晚上搶電視，半夜在床上與男朋友講電話使你無法入睡，還沒算上其他破壞形象的行為。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMuu7S7uBCE
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMJMyien0P
可能你會說家姐是有血緣關係無法與其他女生相提並論，起初我也是這樣以為，但實際例子往往是最好的論證。有一年暑假，家姐的同學來了我家住了幾星期。家姐的同學長得非常可愛，但這個印象僅維持了幾天，往後的日子仿如多了另一位家姐一樣，我平日遇到的痛苦乘以雙倍。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIoZTQciul
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV86s2Fykal
因此我對與女生同居一事只有一個看法，女生的形象率先崩壞，然後你的生活亦隨之崩壞。可能是我太偏激，抑或是我對上述女生本身沒有多餘的遐想。即使今天要與我同居的女生是岑月寧，我還是會拒絕，我怕會破壞她在我心目中的形象。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKAn2e1GWIY
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「你傻架?你話係度住我就會俾你住架啦?就算我肯，我老母都唔肯啦。」我將老媽二字搬出來。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBwoV0pANHX
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5akPE89fkC
「即係你阿媽肯俾我係度住，你就肯?」她抓我說話的漏洞。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk98CJCFpST
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCMztUBHx3j
我心裡想著老媽怎麼可能答允，我就放長雙眼看她怎麼垂頭喪氣的離開。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWF7kale288
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwJ3f2ELXD
「睇下我老母點應你囉。」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZHWpipXk7K
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBhp34g2f5
我跟她說老媽在上班，要十二點才回來，讓她在客廳等。我趕緊換回衣服，然後自顧的走到廚房從櫃中拿出杯麵，打開杯麵提起熱水壺倒水進去。我提著杯麵進房間，打算邊吃邊看伍公子的公子玩walking dead。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1P4MMZwDcE
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想不到她跟著我進房間，我回頭望向她，只見她望著我手上的杯麵嚥口水…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuMFz5hTGG
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「又點啊?想食啊?」我問。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmpuouZftkQ
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她按著肚輕輕點頭。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JSwPXYhRH
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRCoFxRcuru
「又話自己係仙子，乜仙子會肚餓架咩?」我嘲諷著說。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMMZCW7n2n
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBcY4tUiQ6
「唔食咪唔食囉，好叻咩!」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJoRafbm35t
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOGvBakuFg
想不到她是如此倔強，我沒理會她繼續享用杯麵及公子玩。吃完後打算扔垃圾走出房間時，發現她坐在沙發一邊按著肚一邊怒視著我。她的眼神兇悍得猶如我是她仇人一樣，我怕了她，把垃圾扔掉後，便從櫃子裡拿出另一個杯麵，還注滿熱水送到她面前。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLDBIYH1nX1
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkmK73WgzpO
「嗱，食啦，廢事你好似隻餓鬼咁啤實我。」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6hmQFLKLQ
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyYzT6WhIl6
「邊個話我肚餓。」她口嫌體正直，雙手已經捧著杯麵。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN73TMK6Fnz
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmImpnKwX0c
看著她這種反差意外地帶點可愛。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8CNEwdlFS9
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她打開杯麵用鼻吸了一口問:255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6Vp7qVBSQ
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「辣架?」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1rMdNi9B6
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我家的杯麵一向由我包辦，而我只會吃合味道的香辣海鮮味，要在我家找到別的口味是不可能的。我看她神情驟變便說:255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTqgIenOz73
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3KB9G3O98
「唔食得辣啊?咁唔好食囉。」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBwEIJYjIi
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqnTpq7gOH
她聽到後反而大口的把麵條吸入，看她吃得滿頭大汗就覺得有點好笑。這種杯麵的辣連譚仔十小辣都不如，居然有人會吃到出汗。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZsNb0rzpn
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG72R26AWLh
我看她雙唇變得紅彤微腫，便倒了杯水給她，她接過水杯說:255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4tIz5MGH2
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「唔該。」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyc0sRqcLe
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「唔駛，我唔該你就真，俾我發現原來有人咁渣，連合味道嘅辣都頂唔住。」我笑著說。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxEGFppBPZe
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiVZI7a2Q4b
「好好笑咩!?」她突然怒吼。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBjWcP4ZJO
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIAaXF4iDSz
我被她的神情嚇一跳，收起了嬉笑的嘴臉…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHb7Vy74LHP
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1uzf8IL02
「你咁嘅態度對女仔，睇死你一定冇女朋友啦。」她噴出一句。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtp3pIfYfZM
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡelE1RJnBH0
她這一句完全是我的致命傷，我不知如何反駁。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJls0pIl8Cb
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBM7kYsVIti
「唔出聲即係我講中啦。」她接連的攻勢讓我快招架不住。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0CKfdLzlwp
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLM5lR7K5l6
被她說穿事實，我無法裝腔作勢…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zCJpRWOF1
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARnzfv0bEh
「係啦係啦，你啱晒啦得未，我無拍過拖就係原罪，你地有拖拍嘅咪即管笑囉!」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIynwEfW6Hl
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc587YaqyLd
我突然想起今早韓信他們也攻擊我這一點，說完我垂頭回到房間裡再沒跟她講話。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBv3fZsbIl
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJczbgou3LI
尷尬的氣氛維持良久，直到聽到開門聲，老媽終於回來…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6kVbKnofNS
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXp3nCT7X5X
老媽回來便看到那位女生，問我:255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcoT7hBg9sv
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbkieQZ3JXx
「阿仔，呢位邊個嚟?」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxCMniVnJJN
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62EtGNnyUw
「你問我?你不如問下你帶返嚟個茶…」我說到一半嘴巴一隻手被捂著。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECppK3d2E0
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ842P3z4ETm
是她阻止了我，然後她把我老媽拉到廚房小聲的密談，我站在客廳聽不到對話內容。片刻後她們出來，我老媽對著我說:255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0ZThG3mvJ
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFL1fRmlD7
「仔，之後曦…啊唔係，呢位茶小姐會係度住一排。」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡljR2imGNet
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBTl44D9IEE
WTF!?老媽你搞甚麼?居然會讓她住下來?255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpCwIav67zZ
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZVxGv4Px2
「吓!?點解啊?三唔識七點解要俾佢住?邊有咁多地方俾佢瞓?」我愕然的問。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlg3oN65ZlX
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrdw1KN80cD
「你咪理咁多啦，同埋你執返上格床啲野佢瞓返你家姐張床咪得囉。」老媽四兩撥千斤的化解我的問題。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxKoQxbG5qi
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tU9KbFhPF
現在同居還不夠，還要同房是嗎?我完全無法接受，顯然我的抗議無法撼動我老媽，我便抓了那女生到一旁…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7ki5cOonD
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzE3NjmOc1g
「喂!你好講做左啲咩搞到我老母咁順攤?」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHWEUHIK3o
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsR9KHtcx2
「我都話左我係茶碗仙子，呢啲野難唔到我，係你唔信我咋嘛。」她囂張的道。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScHHm5uk9U
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8NHuTQbR3
「仲有我唔係叫喂，叫我做茶小姐!」她接著說。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTs9WcWS14
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ77w2HMNZy
「茶你老…」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahYpnHyNue
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「阿仔，今晚你瞓廳啦，俾人地女仔瞓房啊，聽日返嚟要執好上格床啊。」老媽打斷我的同時下了不人道的命令。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdcBHA0gkr6
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJRwt1ejB3
我不解為何要讓出我的床，怎麼說都應該是她睡在客廳吧…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCFE89nAKP
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnIWKuafDnz
「瞓廳啦你。」她擺出欠打的表情說。255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIWqbdMItr
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZLuZnI86F
「你都痴線，我今晚老虎蟹都瞓房。」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5b6UYncOQ
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW9rkKzgn4I
我絕不退讓，可是強硬姿態敵不過她下一句…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cL96htTOz
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9WpRBqvJH
「今晚想同我同床瞓啊?咸濕仔…」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa4SqZg57H8
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOhY4ReImJT
我不知道她是故意挑逗還是隨口說，換著別人恐怕早就把她吃掉，可是我在這方面是個廢物，面對這種事情就當機不懂反應，她看我呆掉便說:255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0j6EOqsb89
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrQeUGppIQN
「你唔係真係想啊嘛?發夢啦你，同我死出廳瞓!」255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBe5DJ7cM5
255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4q5UeNDwOD
砰!房門大力關上，就這樣我與我的床相隔一道門，只好認命的睡在沙發。唉，我究竟做錯了甚麼落得如此下場，果然與女生同居就不會有好日子過…255Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvjAYJBrTh
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