Some random life stories or just things I overhear 2022 edition - over the span of a few days

Seb "The devil's eggplant."

"You coulda just said dick."

Emily "It smells like lime energy drink."

"IT'S WATER."

"We made rubber porn."

Jackie "Thanks for calling me a piss baby it helped a lot."

"Mah baby!"

"Because the was a slave to Christianity and slave starts with an S."

Very Christian teacher "No. Stop being dumb."

"Tootie poopie baby."

*starts hitting head to the beat of the All Star by Smash mouth*

"He's at god level at bitchyness."

"Who needs friends when you have fictional characters?'

"Did you know there's a new girl?"

"No?"

"WELL I'M GOING TO BE HER BUDDY!"

"Thank you for groping my face."

"I would never call you a backup friend."

"He does it for attention."

"pfft school is a rip off."

"Why is she shoving tissues up her nose."

Jackie "I can't belive I burnt chocolate in the microwave."

"I like how your hair like..."

"Are you talking about a receding hairline?"

Lia "why are my subtitles in koreamn?"

"We made up your mind you are mad."

"Broccoli gives me a headache."

"THAT'S THE GUY WHO DELIVERED MY SHOPPING!"

"she sent it to me first!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"EW HE THREW UP ALL THE EGG!"

"It's sunny and raining at the same time."

"Thats so slay oh wait...it's an add."

"HIS NAME ISN'T ELTON JOHN?"

Lina "I'M FOAM JESUS!"

"OMG IT'S A RANGAAAAAAA!"

"I AM JESUSSS!"

"THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR PRETENDING TO BE ASIAN JESUS I'M SORRY!"

"YOUR KILLING ME WITH FOAM YOU BITCH!"

"Wait...what are you?"

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