我經常做光怪陸離的夢。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqscRORrZaF
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8ilm3stDm
例如上一秒我可能在一大片人群以及鎂光燈下演講和嗚咽、下一秒在地鐵站中被絕種多年的肉食恐龍襲擊然後狂奔。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNriRijEEE
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHrm3YnPDSx
或者本來身處羅浮宮裡遇見Taylor Swift和她的新男友兼且歌詞藍本，一眨眼後就遠在東京的Jazz酒吧和村上春樹對賭大話骰。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPROw8xubl8
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMhtpdHO34G
當然大學二年級的我還是會做很青春期分泌主導的夢，比如與前女友或者性感的女同學在布吉的別墅瘋狂做愛。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfD6NP7kTTZ
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymAQUNpqyV
現實中莫講是別墅並不存在，布吉在疫症蔓延時根本遙不可及。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgHSjrjBh8
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43ioqRoRL7
這些夢雖然有趣，但可能因為太不真實，要區分夢境和現實並沒有太難。倒是昨天晚上，我造了一個匪夷所思但真實感極強的夢。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP0VSZXur19
在夢中我遇見了一隻黑色的貓，牠比176的我還要高一點，拿著木造的權仗，戴黃金的頸圈，像人一樣站着。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNr799YtAr5
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKAhQryw2OE
強要比喻的話，我會說牠跟古埃及文明的貓神長得有幾分像。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxN5oGgWAQ
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7sPqyerLt
「人類，你有想要實現的願望嗎？」貓神用低沉的聲線說，牠大概是一個男性。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5y7jis8mJr
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxYet07Vtba
「我啊？」我望望四周，不見有其他人類，指着自己問。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLCGV5ZQGs
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6r7eyseXd
「對。」貓神用更低沉的聲線說。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9yGnuEtEQ
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOm980q88KE
「啊…咁益我？」我有點迷惘以及搞不清狀況。平常這個時候我大概會意識到自己在發夢，但這次我居然有點覺得這個貓神是實實在在的出現在我面前。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbvURBY27hs
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxPxUUhy2h
對了！409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcm92e0MtGW
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqsm7NT8JE
大概是因為氣味。正常的夢都是沒有氣味的，但這個夢有一股強烈的味道…到底是甚麼味道？有點像小時候去西九龍中心明將壽司內會聞到的味道，腥臭卻異常吸引。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxvQij5Tl9c
「怎麼了，阿日，沒有想實現的願望嗎？」貓神問，聲音變得更更低沉了。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOesAhrcdZz
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwO1ZPhZKu
阿日是我的名字。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGdWUguLY4
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNJRpKJR07
「願望唔係無…但你係咪一定要用書面語講野？」我抓抓頭問，再一次懷疑到底這是夢境還是現實。如果是現實的話，整個設定未免太中二病了吧？還有為什麼牠會知道我的名字？409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1aTKiv1dI
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyLvrULIaA
「所以我用口語說話就是你的最大願望嗎？」貓神用百萬富翁裡陳啓泰「最後答案？」似的語氣反問我。我並沒有看過陳啓泰的百萬富翁，但「我讀drama㗎」陳芷青經典之作卻在成長過程看過上千次。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgtbK5riLyD
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhja87axts
「不是！不是！」我連忙答。怎麼我也變成了用書面語說話的怪人？409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiSx89uKPu
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUa24iwohul
「我既願望…嗯…」世界和平實在太虛偽，變成全世界最有錢這種事實在太沒挑戰性。心想事成這種願望太空泛。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8M4SxMlCzc
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7eNBzfwov8
神貓降生在我面前，我得想一個對世界有意義的願望，不然就實在是太窩囊了。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzndl1DKv5
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWdIhggzuFC
快要到聖誕節…這個節日實在太可惡。好！我決定好了！409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡISQ1H9RQEU
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHMbAe9WXE
「我聖誕節想同女神一齊過！一齊返屋企！」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RACpCWKA7
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fvNcd20qw
「很好，我可以幫你實現願望。請問你的女神是誰？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxTwtsJ6nTX
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz5AQkx4n0i
「住我屋企隔離既敏青。」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38hFeJHdaK
敏青是我高中的暗戀對象。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VTr9DuEzh
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8NoUG6Pl5
女神成績很好，公開試前一直替我補習，可惜還沒有告訴她我的心意，我們便進入了不同的大學。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dmQ8A4b6G
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVw3IpXuzHA
當然我沒有辜負她的努力幫忙，我和敏青分別進了兩大，她是中文大學的學生，我則進了香港大學持續進修學院。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ17HJKp2QUj
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDObfeiIJCd
因為是鄰居的關係，事實上我自小便認識她。我們住在元朗的小區，中學就在可步行的距離。高中前的敏青外表還是一個很普通的女生，但中四拔掉眼鏡，留黑長髮的她，加上溫柔樂天的性格，開始成為學校男生瘋狂追捧的對象。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPQwipihx6
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwzJYvMigCU
我也在差不多的時候為她著迷，甚至有點後悔沒有及早追求她。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5hQbkWaN2R
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5BMryuyJQh
以我所知，中學時期因為學業和家規，她基本上都拒絕了這些狂蜂浪蝶的追求，亦乖乖的在十時前回家，十二時前睡覺。但進了大學後，喜歡她的人就更多了，聽說有追求者成功了，女神也已經變成別人的女朋友。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6aONvpk1nE
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgFYovq8S7x
「很好，你的願望就是『聖誕節與敏青一起過，然後一同回家。』，對吧？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHc4cJKP3lZ
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftebZSZUJa
貓神刻意低沉的聲音有點像老虎低吟，把我拉回現實（或者夢境）。我想起自己小時候還沒有長喉核時，為了不讓別人覺得我是女生，花了很多時間學習聲線壓低的方法。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5fKsPyaJj
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnJsvDv3nW4
「等等！」我叫。「如果只係聖誕咁未得一日？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4gkbhNy7x
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAV55AhUXX1
「是的。」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTPs23ZEEd
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8kSuahU8C
「咁除夕倒數呢咁？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2pfUdSdDBM
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XQmhELBa1
「你的願望不能確保。」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ZDY60w8Gt
「咁唔得，咁我改一下…我想願望係『聖誕與敏青一同回家，然後每日與敏青一起過。』」我說。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA0SV0cgNS8
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHPqdK1VnnR
「很好，讓我改一下咒語。『聖誕與…』」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1BTVlsMSgV
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa7YeY6yGRF
「等等等，如果我個願望咁樣咪即係好似迫女神鍾意我同埋同我一齊咁樣？我唔想強迫佢嘅意願…」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgy1kJ2vUJA
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzId5hkmuQJ
「的確是強迫啊。」貓神說，這次沒有那麼低沉。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRyGzKGAUgc
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2LVP3UKi2
「咁我改一下我個願望。我個願望係想女神都鍾意我，咁樣咪唔係強迫囉！」我沾沾自喜。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZJn9awgsA
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ73Y7yqaO9D
「好。最後答案？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqz5Fk3Xv2
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ThDRdyYsm
「無錯…」我有點猶豫。「啊！等陣！」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNH5qNmanVS
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtUztEYZjY
「又點呀！！！」貓神暴怒地呼叫，聲調卻變得高起來，看來牠也像青春期的我一樣在刻意壓低聲線。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZAvqOxdirI
「原來你識講口語…」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYXKnO9wWP
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVdqnugFza
「改夠未呀煩膠？」貓神大力用權杖撞落地上，我感覺到地面澎澎作響。我有點出奇貓神也懂得「煩膠」這個用語，貓界也有兩登嗎？409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8tsNDNVTA
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp38tCyq7iv
「今次真係最後…」我說，「如果你個咒語搞到我變咗女仔，咁我去咗女神屋企咪英雄無用武之地，所以我繼續要係男仔，而且每晚都要同女神一齊瞓！」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwD0EXDmzB
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCcpdFKEtWG
「『煩膠阿日由聖誕開始將會與女神敏青同居、同睡。其間敏青將會視阿日為最愛，而阿日將保持雄性身份。』，此乃第一個願望，未許之願還剩兩個。貓貓貓貓貓貓貓貓貓貓…」貓神再次壓低聲線，用力念着咒語。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoT2snVdNF
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfQZ4eY5UOQ
「貓貓貓貓貓貓？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Vbf3jxPNL
「雄性？點解係用雄性呢個字唔係用男仔？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrZsanyOaM
「原來仲有兩個願望？」409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAzy06bictu
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5eB8x2TiM
很多問題浮在我的腦海，我嘗試大聲叫出來，卻有如黑洞一樣的力量在拉扯着我的身體以及腦袋，然後把我的聲線完全給進無底深潭內。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZXR6W7wZRj
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4PrKJ9Vmi
四肢好像沒有辦法發力一樣，心臟停止跳動，身體各個器官都出現前所未見的劇痛，感覺就像貓神走進了我的身體內，然後用權仗把我的世界劃破再重新裝坎。就像遇見了死神一樣，卻又突然被賦予重生的感覺。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIuY2BVZ5A
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2KnTOAasi
如果還有兩個願望的話，我寧願不許，也絕對不想再經歷兩次這種痛楚…409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSNr1z40iFZ
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsspHYlxjvK
我在睡夢中醒來。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAtqzjeUc3m
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOFzw2zPy91
我突然想起，那股在剛才那個夢境以及名將壽司中出現過的香味是什麼。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1PeteNLJW
409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYBWugcSNY
是過期罐頭裏的吞拿魚。409Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUDHRnkeSpO
然後按「加至主畫面」