.
There he stood..
"Wil-" I stuttered, tears filling my eyes, "Wilbur?!" The tall man turned around to see me.
"Sam- Sammie?!" He exclaimed. I ran to the taller man and hugged him tightly. Something was different this time, though. His embrace wasn't warm like it usually was.. It was cold.. Ice cold.. "God, I missed you.. You'd be surprised, Sam- the things a decade in limbo without his lover's touch does to a man,"
I pulled away from the hug slightly, but still touched him. I refused to let him go.
"A- A decade?" I asked in shock and confusion.
"Ohhh- nobody told you, huh?" Wilbur asked. I shook my head and Wil sighed in return, "Time in limbo is much longer than time on earth,"
My eyes widened.
"So.. You were there.. For a decade?!" I almost yelled. Pain laced the tone of my voice. Wilbur nodded.
"But- but- it's okay, Sam- I'm here now," Wilbur replied. Tears began to fill my eyes.
"I- I tried, Wil- I really tried-"
"Shhh- Sam- I know- I know you did," Wilbur pulled me into another hug, petting my head, being careful as to not touch my horns.
"I lost a life today just to make sure I had another chance to see you again," I stated. Wilbur stopped petting my head and I felt his breathing come to a halt, "Wil-"
"You what?" He asked, pulling away once again. I could feel his eyes on me, but I refused to make eye contact with him. I swallowed the lump in my throat, "Sam, why-"
"They were gonna kill Dream- and- and- Dream's the only one that knows how to revive people," I quickly answered, "Dream has a revive book and.. He's the only way I could bring you back,"
Wilbur pulled me back into the hug, petting my head again.
"How many? How many are left?" He asked.
"Four,"
Wilbur let out a loud hissing sound, as if he had been punched in the gut. Only, this wasn't physical. Wilbur hearing the amount of lives I had lost hurt him mentally, emotionally. He began to lace the hair he was petting between his fingers. It seemed to comfort him more than it did me.
"Okay..." Wilbur whispered to himself. "I'll protect you.. I'll protect you.."
He spoke as if he didn't intend for me to hear it, even though I did anyway. I allowed myself to soak in the cold embrace, slowly becoming more accustomed to the coolness of Wilbur's skin. I looked up at Wilbur, staring into his honey brown eyes. He smiled slightly before leaving a small peck on my nose. I felt Wilbur turn his head to look in a different direction,
"I hear people," He stated. I listened in, my horns enhancing the noises. I could hear Ranboo, Tubbo, and Tommy conversating.
"Shit- Tommy's gonna be so pissed at me," I stated. Wilbur pulled away from me.
"Hide," He demanded, his voice no longer soft as it was just moments ago.
"What-?" I asked.
"Hide, Sam! Now!" Wilbur almost yelled. I jumped slightly at the sudden raise of his voice. I then did as the older had told me to. The only problem with end-folk is we have horrible memories and get distracted so terribly easy. So, after a few minutes of sitting there, I wandered off. I walked throughout the DSMP just looking at things. I wandered on for so long that I hadn't realized where I had ended up. Staring up at a 21 foot tall god, dazed and confused as to how I got there, I finally greeted myself.
"Foolish- hey!" I said, still confused. The god looked down at me and smiled warmly, curiosity burning in his eyes. Even though he was undoubtedly freakishly tall and could probably kill me within the snap of his fingers, his smile still made me feel welcomed. Foolish was one of the few people that knew of my insecurities of my height. I had vented to him about it one day under the stress of the wars. I was always so small and vulnerable to everyone in the DSMP and it made me feel less than all of them.
"Hey.. Sammie- uh- why are you here?" Foolish asked, tilting his head. The god knelt down so he could hear better.
"I... Don't know, actually," I replied, honestly "I was just wandering and well- my feet decided to lead me here, I guess,"202Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3J1nrt3yJ
"Well- you look under stress and honestly, a little less alive compared to the last time I saw you. The purple particles that float all around you have died down. Last time there were approximately 200 particles and now there's only 120," Foolish stated. I often wondered why the god did things like count the purple particles that surround me or pay attention to how dark the circles under people's eyes have gotten, but It felt almost like if I asked I'd be intruding the man's business. I laughed nervously.
"Well- I died again, if that helps answer some of your questions," I stated. Foolish's facial expression quickly went from chipper to concerned, his eyes drowning in curiosity.
"Again? W-okay- Well- how many are you down to?" Foolish asked.
"Four," I felt Foolish halt completely. My horns didn't detect any sign of him breathing, "Foolish-"
"Samuel- that's dangerous.. Brutally dangerous- do you even know the kind of target people have on your back?!" The god asked, slight irritation in his voice. He was trying hard not to yell; it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out.
"Well, yeah- but Foolish-" I began, Foolish immediately cutting me off.
"Get on my hand," He said, holding his hand out on the ground.
"Why?" I asked, confused. Foolish let out a quiet sigh.
"Just do it, please- I want to show you something," He replied. I didn't waste any more of the totem's time and climbed onto his hand. After the totem noticed I was comfortably sitting he stood up and began walking. We walked around the temple of undying. "Do you know how much work I've put into this temple, Sammie?"
I shook my head.
"I've spent countless days and nights, hours and hours, weeks upon weeks full of blood, sweat, and tears working on this temple," Foolish stated.
"Colour me impressed," I said. Foolish let out a sound of disapproval.
"But do you wanna know something?" Foolish asked me. I tilted my head and looked up at the totem, "none of it really means anything. I mean- it could pull a L'Manberg and get blown up and I could just rebuild it again. But do you know something that actually has meaning?"
"What?"
"You," Foolish answered. I stared at the totem, not knowing how to respond, "You, Fundy, Tommy, Tubbo, Ranboo.. You and everyone you're close with. That means something to you, doesn't it?" I looked at the totem to meet his gaze and quickly realized he was looking at the clock around my neck. I tucked the clock underneath my shirt and cleared my throat.
"Well- yeah-"
"So why aren't you protecting it? And I don't mean like- weapons and armour protection- I'm saying.." Foolish sighed and tried piecing words together, "Why do you allow bad things to happen to you, knowing it's going to damage them as well?"
I stared at the totem in shock, stunned and robbed of my own words.
"You probably think things'd be easier if you weren't here- if you didn't exist, correct?" Foolish asked me. I just barely nodded. Foolish let out another sigh, "Did you know that I witnessed people you were close to fall apart after Wilbur died all because of how you were doing? Because you cut everybody off- you cut the whole world off, Sam.. That hurt a lot of people,"
I felt tears begin to form in my eyes.
"There are a lot of people that care about you, Sam- and if you think that dying would make their lives easier- would make anybody's lives easier- you have the wrong mindset.. I think you need to re-think things and look at things from other people's viewpoints as well as yours," The god stated. I wiped my eyes and nodded. I looked up and immediately noticed that it had started to get dark out, and it seemed Foolish noticed as well. I cleared my throat,
"Well- I should probably get going- it's getting late, uh," I paused, "Thank you, Foolish. For knocking some sense into me in the most passive aggressive way possible. And um- thank you for having patience with me,"
Foolish nodded.
"We're friends, Sam- I wouldn't want anything bad happening to you," Foolish replied, "I don't like it when you come visit me and you're missing 100 more particles,"
"I'm sorry for that- I'll be more careful from now on,"
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SWITCHING POVS- 3RD PERSON
TW: toxic arguing, manipulation
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Wilbur searched.. No Sam..
He searched again.. No Sam..
So he decided to wait.. He went home- to the home him and Samuel had lived in before he died.. And he waited.. Sam hadn't come home for hours and without letting Wilbur know he was leaving, had Wilbur on edge. Wilbur was protective, possessive, jealous, and controlling. Not knowing where the lover he hadn't seen in 13 and a half years had him in a bit of a dilemma. He wanted to keep Sam safe, especially now that he was down to 4 lives. He wanted to lock him in a cage and never let him go, satisfied knowing he was keeping him safe. Safe from everybody around him that was deemed a threat. But there was one question Wil' hadn't thought about..
"Who will save Sam from himself?"
It was nearing 12:40 AM when the front door opened. Wilbur jumped up from the couch and rushed to the door. When the taller saw Sam he pulled him into a hug, and not a loose one.
"God, Sam... I was so worried.." Wilbur said in relief, the frustration and worry fading, but only for a moment before he spoke next. He pulled away from the hug, "where the fuck were you?!"
"I was wandering, Wil'- I didn't even notice I left the DSMP until-"
"YOU LEFT THE DSMP?!" Wilbur yelled, earning a flinch from Sam.
"W-Wil.." Sam said quietly. Wilbur sighed in irritation and paced back and forth, "I saw Foolish- nothing happened to me,"
"But something could have happened, Sam!" Wilbur insisted, "I can't have you just- just leaving my side without warning! I need you to tell me if you plan on going somewhere!"
"I'm sorry-"
"God, Sam- you don't get it, do you?! I was dead for THIRTEEN YEARS! Thirteen years without my lover! And then I come back to find out that he's lost a life and is down to FOUR when he started his life with FUCKING TEN!" Wilbur continued, "Sam- I'd go INSANE if you died! I'd tear this whole fucking world apart for you! Do you get that?! Do you WANT that?!"
Sam looked down and shook his head.
"I didn't fucking think so.." Wilbur said, pausing a moment to think, "If you gave up so much- if you tried so fucking hard just to bring me back, why are you so quick to just fuck everything up? Why are you trying to fuck everything up?!"
"I'M NOT!" Sam finally yelled back.
"THEN FUCKING SHOW IT, GODDAMNIT! SHOW IT!" Wilbur yelled back. The two were screaming at each other so loudly that you'd think they could be heard all the way from Snowchester.
"IT HASN'T EVEN BEEN A DAY, WIL'! NOT EVEN A DAY! 'SHOW IT'? DON'T YOU THINK I FUCKING TRIED THAT WHEN THE FIRST THING I DID AFTER WAKING UP FROM MY 6TH DEATH THROUGHOUT THE 28 YEARS I'VE LIVED WAS RUN TO FUCKING SEE YOU?! TO MAKE SURE THAT I WAS THE FIRST FUCKING PERSON YOU SPOKE TO?!" Sam screamed.
"WELL THAT WASN'T ENOUGH,"
"WHAT WILL BE ENOUGH FOR YOU, WILBUR? HUH?! CAN YOU TELL ME THAT? BECAUSE NOTHING IS EVER ENOUGH! NOT WITH YOU IT ISN'T!" The tears falling from Sam's eyes burned his skin, "I DIE FOR YOU, TWICE?! AND THIS IS HOW YOU REACT ALL BECAUSE I SAW A FUCKING FRIEND? ALL BECAUSE I DIDN'T TELL YOU WHERE I WENT?! I'M NOT FIVE FUCKING YEARS OLD, WILBUR! I'M 28!"
Wilbur had no response. All of the words in his vocabulary had been stolen from him.
"Did you even know-" Sam began again, choking on his words, "Did you even know that I lose particles every time I die? That my skin gets paler and the bags under my eyes get heavier? Did you know that over time, the tears burning into my skin get less painful as I get more used to it from crying so fucking much? All over you.. It's always over you, Wil'-"
Wilbur just sat there in silence, not saying a word.
"Really? No, 'I'm sorry'? No apology? No 'I'm sorry I lashed out and SCREAMED at you, even though I know you're sensitive to loud noise'?!" Sam asked. He wasn't necessarily looking for a direct apology- hell not even an apology at all. Just something. Maybe an 'I love you', or an 'I missed you'. Wilbur still left no response, which in return earned a scoff from the shorter, "I'm going to bed,"
"Sam- no- stay here-"
"And do what?! Argue with you some more?! Scream at you some more!? My throat HURTS, Wil! My voice is fucking hoarse- can you not hear it breaking?!" Sam yelled.
"You don't need to talk just.. Stay with me for a bit.. Please.." Wilbur tried once more. Sam scoffed again.
"Not even an 'I love you'.." Sam's voice began to break once again, as tears began to burn against his skin even more as his crying grew worse, "Goodnight,"
And then he walked to his room. He laid down in bed and fell asleep.
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Was that angsty enough for ya? Well- here's to saddening chapters. I hope you all enjoyed the two chapters I've released at the same time- I spent a lot of time trying to write them. Unsure of where to go with it all for a while, I finally figured it out. Thank you for reading- I really do hope you all stay for the following chapters.
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