751Please respect copyright.PENANA44xWP5SUuB
751Please respect copyright.PENANAWJXsbSemnu
從前,一個養過貓的朋友告訴過我,動物都有一種天性,就是:不作死就會死。751Please respect copyright.PENANAr6WVX0UDGB
751Please respect copyright.PENANAJi6Dch7rz3
起初我對他這句話一笑置之,始終我又無養寵物,關我撚事。那個時候我所領會到的反而是另一件事,就是人類真是好撚煩的動物,為求存在感,可以捉住其他人,不管對方意願如何,都不厭其煩地說同一番話一次,一次,又一次,真係煩撚過閪。751Please respect copyright.PENANAUVb5rwOrML
751Please respect copyright.PENANAOfvXLWcurs
不過事後,我卻發現那個人所說的話是有點道理的,更驚訝是這不局限於貓,其他有智慧的動物,甚至是人,都會有這個特性。751Please respect copyright.PENANA9KiXxXMv2A
751Please respect copyright.PENANATN7DHOgn8i
最先讓我發現這一點,是在一個叫胡紹權的男人身上。雖然他是隻半人半獸的生物,也扑過小紅……751Please respect copyright.PENANASODmNkUwUB
751Please respect copyright.PENANAc0zzxeIego
說起這件事,我再次感覺到自己真的已經原諒了他,要原諒一個人確實是不容易,最大原因是因為即使你已經原諒了一個人,也忘記了,又或是根本不知道自己是怎樣原諒他。751Please respect copyright.PENANAaY75K924Wl
751Please respect copyright.PENANAAEIdEYHkIU
屌那媽,離題鳥。751Please respect copyright.PENANAnNaf5USfNX
751Please respect copyright.PENANALyDHadoB0n
說回阿權的事跡。話說是這樣的,公司有老鼠其實不是什麼祕密,也非什麼怪事,始終M記是一間餐廳,所以幾乎每間分店都會有,間中跑出一兩隻是很正常的事,為免牠們跑出店面,我們都會放三四個誘捕器而非用毒藥,要是吃了毒藥又臨時死不去,出到店面才反肚的話,可是會令我非常頭痕(雖然揹鑊的通常都是店長或一些小經理,但作為他們上頭既本人都要寫大一堆report)。751Please respect copyright.PENANAQ1FJAYpEHS
751Please respect copyright.PENANAJ1XKD8OoUd
老鼠出現的問題是不會完結的,因為牠們總是源源不絕,而且無孔不入,可幸誘捕器總能好好發揮作用,一波又一波的老鼠家族通常一來到都好快會冚家剷。751Please respect copyright.PENANAnDyc8h1Tfo
751Please respect copyright.PENANAHadKEFI6NC
但這只限於「通常」的情況下,因為有某些分店的鼠患是好鳩犀利的,可幸在我管的區裡就只有一間。751Please respect copyright.PENANA7lFdWJYBtI
751Please respect copyright.PENANAKLtu0dvLCK
老鼠的問題在這家分店一直沒有好轉,這與那裡員工的衛生程度有著好大關係,但這並非最大的問題,它的工作效率與服務態度等等都有著缺陷性的低落。751Please respect copyright.PENANAu5CgFAvABQ
751Please respect copyright.PENANAOTcKosIBhZ
低迷是源自那店店長——Eric上位後才開始的。751Please respect copyright.PENANANwO3JSrzB3
751Please respect copyright.PENANAKIRmScR4fP
Eric是個約三十幾歲的風流自走炮(花花公子),全間店都是小妹妹又或者靚女,唔係青春就大波,唔係大波就長腿,總之個撚個都好鳩正。751Please respect copyright.PENANAaiNEzzXoeU
751Please respect copyright.PENANAwWB8Shu0A7
所以保守估計,當中至少有五成員工都與他有著非一般的關係。就感覺上,我認為他請人回來是為了扑,而不是工作。751Please respect copyright.PENANAuvkJ301ahN
751Please respect copyright.PENANAqjlMbNd1S7
雖然我可以耍些小手段讓他收皮,但我沒有這樣的打算,根本沒有必要為這個蛋散出太多力。751Please respect copyright.PENANA8GVPKhuAYp
751Please respect copyright.PENANAf6btnN5Imu
所以我心生一計去解決這個問題。751Please respect copyright.PENANATWhgDOGExb
751Please respect copyright.PENANAGcEnl2upaq
首先派我手下的粗口星人阿權每幾日屌佢鑊金(想起來,其實阿權都幾做得野,又識補位,是個不錯的副手。),然後我就得閒去同佢傾下計。751Please respect copyright.PENANAyyCWSugk3L
751Please respect copyright.PENANA6UQhncjPrt
一個唱紅面,一個唱白面,好快eric的情況就有好轉,手下的娘子兵發揮正常功能,也沒有串咀與黑面,實在可喜可賀。751Please respect copyright.PENANACQPGZVk7w3
751Please respect copyright.PENANATyCHD3dLxd
但低迷時期所積下來的老鼠大軍還是沒有解決,為了解決這最後的問題,我找個朋友訂造了一組「有入無出摩天輪式誘捕器」,它的最大特式是夠大,夠舒服。751Please respect copyright.PENANAg0MeLsdO7J
751Please respect copyright.PENANANGuO2cQ7Ts
用法就是放入食之不盡的食物,讓籠裡像天國一樣,加上多個古怪的機關,使老鼠樂而忘返,引誘更多同類落搭。751Please respect copyright.PENANAiv8T8xYyGC
751Please respect copyright.PENANApQGyAyyPA6
引入這個裝置後,果然非常有效,第一日已經捉到五大隻老鼠。751Please respect copyright.PENANAFvBwdNTwux
751Please respect copyright.PENANANDWp1rSwMQ
而問題就在這個時候出現了。751Please respect copyright.PENANAWKonElOfmi
751Please respect copyright.PENANAMzIBHewRwq
當晚我和阿權親自去檢查捕鼠的戰果,一拿出籠,店裡全女班的員工一見到裡面幾隻又大又肥的老鼠,無一不被嚇得尖叫。751Please respect copyright.PENANADreSC7BBUD
751Please respect copyright.PENANA7ZH5346NJp
阿權聽到囡囡們的慘叫聲好像痴左線一樣,開始拎住個籠周圍嚇她們,隨後更玩到過鳩哂火,想捉隻出來向囡囡們展示自己的勇氣認叻。751Please respect copyright.PENANA5pwarJ844h
751Please respect copyright.PENANAGdzK8OpbBc
拎出黎唔係問題,只係佢拎住隻老鼠變撚到好似凱撒大帝咁,係咁將手上面隻野左舞右舞,之後重問班囡囡:751Please respect copyright.PENANA1KBbemtilg
751Please respect copyright.PENANAkN3FWG0DLG
「你地知唔知啊,以前我地窮起上黎捱餓果時啊,真係唔理得咁多,乜鳩野都好,有得食就食架喇!所以我以前連老鼠都食過啊。」751Please respect copyright.PENANA1fj7lZqV0c
751Please respect copyright.PENANA8wl20bDkwH
其中一個長腿妹即刻有少少驚又閪住面咁話:751Please respect copyright.PENANAVwQZXahh9u
751Please respect copyright.PENANA8Sw6g7HeTF
「我點知你係咪講真啊。」751Please respect copyright.PENANAkQv1fRsSP8
751Please respect copyright.PENANAqXz5GhVFuV
聽到依句,我就知下一秒會發生什麼事,唉屌,今次仆街鳥……751Please respect copyright.PENANAc3OBRiqnnR
751Please respect copyright.PENANAlK5xzYdN0p
果然下一秒,我就聽到「炸~~~」一聲!之後就傳出令人心寒的「吱!」一聲長嗚,隨後是一眾女人的尖叫聲。751Please respect copyright.PENANAhyfQMIYRwN
751Please respect copyright.PENANAf3eZauNzFj
屌佢老母個甩毛閪,條撚樣眼都唔眨就將隻老鼠掉鳩左落炸爐……當我走到過去想屌柒佢既時候,我聞到有陣重臭過爛屎既腐臭味。751Please respect copyright.PENANAxAG73uYV2H
751Please respect copyright.PENANA7e9N6YGlEu
再望望阿權,佢望住炸爐入面浮面的綠色泡,已經青都面埋,睇黎已經知道自己玩大左。751Please respect copyright.PENANAyZP1U8Ejhi
751Please respect copyright.PENANAmnYXMJA3ny
算喇,唔鳩緊要,我本來都無諗過即場屌佢,至少佢假假地都係我條靚,係依度算係一人之下,萬人之上。751Please respect copyright.PENANAkVGqf987n6
751Please respect copyright.PENANAsKu2QTwULH
點知下一秒,我屌爆佢都母個閪!條友竟然比d屎味嚇到戇鳩鳩,亂左方寸,唔鳩小心整撚跌左個老鼠籠。751Please respect copyright.PENANAkgAhcuR7U8
751Please respect copyright.PENANAEJqd7JL8DO
「嘭!」之後,就是我的一聲怒吼:751Please respect copyright.PENANAvwZKTm7JzN
751Please respect copyright.PENANAE1T2mUYhlw
「胡紹權!我屌你老母,玩玩玩,玩乜撚野啊?」751Please respect copyright.PENANAbFjvY8pdxm
751Please respect copyright.PENANAc9m2xbKwYQ
屌你老母!但屌黎都無用,個籠一落地,四隻老鼠即刻快過支箭閃人,已經追唔鳩返。好彩當時已經關店,否則真係大撚鳩柒閪鑊。751Please respect copyright.PENANAbHxbwxhj2Y
751Please respect copyright.PENANAYFbRoKv9hz
由於之前講過,在場我最大,而阿權又係我既人,所以我屌完佢一句之後,再無人敢亂講野,然後換左缸油,求其消個毒就當無事發生過。751Please respect copyright.PENANAXI0ZbXu1c2
751Please respect copyright.PENANAmnLfxKl9NL
就這樣,屌完阿權一鑊金我在他身上真正明白到,乜野叫做「唔作死就會死」,然後才發現到,原來這樣的事每日都在自己身邊不斷重演著。751Please respect copyright.PENANAtC3MiCqrYZ
751Please respect copyright.PENANACPorI9NcVA
但我萬萬沒想到,去到今日,終於輪到自己親自奶野……751Please respect copyright.PENANA4d6jyfgyO9
751Please respect copyright.PENANAx9666Wsbae
751Please respect copyright.PENANAoPhOMza0B5
回到現在,回答完賣菜佬的問題:「In fact, I can't call this is a business. Because I am a M記 Manager.」751Please respect copyright.PENANAIg0dD9am0n
751Please respect copyright.PENANAYpD78xg4Hv
我感覺到一刻自己的心好像被抽乾一樣,下一秒心臟即時極速跳動,全身的毛管都如同人浪一樣從腳至頭,下至上豎起。751Please respect copyright.PENANAVOgplwiG1f
751Please respect copyright.PENANAcKUr9ZpBso
斜眼瞄到阿花那青綠色的咀臉,我即時將焦點抽開,然後又發現坐在對面的三人又呆著地望鳩住我。751Please respect copyright.PENANASs3QtSH65j
751Please respect copyright.PENANAavR1mS9xx0
也許我真的做了無法挽回的事呢……哈哈。751Please respect copyright.PENANAgxa5U0gpaH
751Please respect copyright.PENANAesVyay9AC0
若有人嚴刑逼供問我為什麼要這樣做的話,我大概也不能真心說出個理由,因為我就是單純想這樣做,單純想攪屎棍啊……751Please respect copyright.PENANADE4yQAm6N2
751Please respect copyright.PENANA8zRE7ymmY1
不過,深入思考一下,也許這與我坐呆了,被冷落久了有關。人無聊起來的時候,往往都會做出一些爆炸性的事來獲得存在感。而我也是個人,所以難免會這樣……751Please respect copyright.PENANA621fsZ0Ai8
751Please respect copyright.PENANAOAI0Hjfr1v
但這樣屎忽痕一下,可能會撤底地害死我……又或是已經害死了。751Please respect copyright.PENANA58eVjYlVCd
751Please respect copyright.PENANAxRxuWFLuut
下一秒,那個本來一臉冷酷的銀行佬臉色忽然變得唔對路,然後用名牌手拍抹抹額上的汗,有點緊張地問:751Please respect copyright.PENANAvMvOyFoJzU
751Please respect copyright.PENANAtM92qiQszc
「你怎樣可以證明自己真的在M記工作?(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAGXmceeTKsK
751Please respect copyright.PENANAxM8G0wRNSZ
這個問法和語氣都非常不自然,讓我有點錯覺,以為剛剛自誇是美園電腦創辦人,冒充「鏢雞」一樣。751Please respect copyright.PENANAVDH1QQDpg4
751Please respect copyright.PENANAmyQWdfNBd4
簡單點來說,銀行佬的語氣是對一個衝大頭的人專有的質問。751Please respect copyright.PENANA9PenLL0e4W
751Please respect copyright.PENANAJg7DcoEslS
但我可只是如實回答,而且自報是個M記的經理,叫我該怎樣證明,該怎樣回答這個問題?751Please respect copyright.PENANAJKfAE6P7YR
751Please respect copyright.PENANAw6WoTScCJV
唔通要我由做兼職整包開始講起?我唔認為佢會有興趣知道。751Please respect copyright.PENANA5r3eNYlvBB
751Please respect copyright.PENANARCdOLgxTRQ
想不到緊接著這句話,一把老邁沉實的聲音卻忽然開口,似是叫住那銀行佬一樣:751Please respect copyright.PENANA129h3SuDtG
751Please respect copyright.PENANAIQ5n6BoCAz
「貝克。(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANApaCDZu7gfi
751Please respect copyright.PENANA4Cm8W7lLT1
聲音主人是跨國大企業「大貓重工」的超級高層,也是我所在這圍枱五個人裡面輩份最高,握權最大,說話最有力量的一個,先前大段時間,全枱的話題都一直圍著他作中心旋轉。751Please respect copyright.PENANAvaVm2GRYyb
751Please respect copyright.PENANAX3bGXCg34g
然後他又繼續保持著絕不含糊的語氣,緩緩說道:751Please respect copyright.PENANA4vykNCIWYm
751Please respect copyright.PENANASzcPcYEzOm
「你這樣質問我們的朋友,實在有點失禮了。Mr Bob,請原諒貝克的失禮,他只是有點不知所措才會說這樣的話來。(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANANJFk577B1F
751Please respect copyright.PENANADRE0OzfXx1
喂,我有會錯意嗎?他這是在為我解圍嗎?一個跨國企業,座擁幾十億身家的超級富豪為我解圍嗎?751Please respect copyright.PENANA8KqvXcDOMT
751Please respect copyright.PENANAclw2FLoWt3
讓我開始有懷疑,剛剛錯口介紹自己是超人或是蝙蝠俠了嗎?還是M記的經理原來擁有著與超人同樣的地位?751Please respect copyright.PENANAha4By47Rsn
751Please respect copyright.PENANA28NQ1aaTgC
不論是哪個答案都好,都是痴撚鳩線,讓人一頭霧水。751Please respect copyright.PENANAz9bSfq7wHL
751Please respect copyright.PENANAlZIf3Pp1tg
聽完大貓的一番話,沒有人敢開口說話,然後大貓又唱一口手上的酒,滿臉皺紋的他皺一皺眉,帶點善意的語氣問阿花:751Please respect copyright.PENANA2FRTVOd7DR
751Please respect copyright.PENANAeqE4Ac5Kk8
「有點唐突,Mrs Chu啊,為什麼你不好好介紹這位貴重的朋友,讓我們都差點冷落他了。(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAjr3aIPNRs4
751Please respect copyright.PENANAQecJ2yNlJT
我覺得自己應該被抬舉到一個不知名的程度了,又或是……我行走江湖多年的直覺好像帶來了另一個答案。751Please respect copyright.PENANAoDEh2ubMii
751Please respect copyright.PENANA1xMaexhSwU
一個人忽然客客氣氣,離不開只有兩個原因,一是示弱,二是保持鎮定。751Please respect copyright.PENANAlsIlcHr4ZQ
751Please respect copyright.PENANAwYWgC4Ogs9
兩個情況都大多在講數時會見到。751Please respect copyright.PENANA1rCG3O5XKj
751Please respect copyright.PENANA7sBmaysm9c
前者就是當其中一方被鏈住春袋的時候,反應離不開,不是發神經,就是表現得好客氣。751Please respect copyright.PENANAvfZFEzqxk3
751Please respect copyright.PENANAiLWnmSxGpw
後者就是其中一方被另一方無意拋疾時,往往都會變得稍微客氣一點,保持鎮定觀望大勢,以冷靜應對。751Please respect copyright.PENANAxGlqggC48B
751Please respect copyright.PENANA49YKyxDfbM
大貓應該就是後者了。751Please respect copyright.PENANAXxG7BZ4scN
751Please respect copyright.PENANABFjPElkR5T
阿花被這樣一問,也能保持鎮定,大方微笑地回答,不愧是個在大陸黃業打滾了十幾廿年的老江湖:751Please respect copyright.PENANA7mltA7rBVy
751Please respect copyright.PENANAuvOZR4D5uy
「啊,抱歉,Bob不太常與我談討工作上的事情,而且我也不清楚他是否願意表明自己的身份呢。(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAdF7GIuURxP
751Please respect copyright.PENANALB7CEOmhaI
這是經過思考所得出的客觀,而且合理的答案。751Please respect copyright.PENANAyV7erWcV6U
751Please respect copyright.PENANAL8YFbv36Pj
大貓點點頭,扶一扶自己的金絲眼鏡,將焦點轉到我身上,繼續保持著善意詢問:751Please respect copyright.PENANAvK6Oi8OUwD
751Please respect copyright.PENANAUGXFAJBhJ6
「來了位難得的朋友,實在使我久違地有點興奮呢。Mr Bob,可以讓我先問一個問題嗎?(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAav18MVP7cQ
751Please respect copyright.PENANA5yb7bLVvo7
估計沒有錯,他明顯企圖試探我的底細,當然我也沒有拒絕的理由,必先搞清楚是什麼原因讓他不得不保持謹慎。751Please respect copyright.PENANAKLpIUqhwTr
751Please respect copyright.PENANAKXYatMCDya
「Oh…Why not?」我隱悔微笑,大方地答允。751Please respect copyright.PENANAb1RUo48GBx
751Please respect copyright.PENANAfJtiU0fXFo
然後,他單刀直入地試探我的個人立場以及意願:「你今天是以個人身份來的嗎?(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAXE20A9OOEe
751Please respect copyright.PENANAIqgCQ2B88G
這樣問,很大原因是他希望得知我有沒有代表什麼組織來到今天的聚會,看來答案已經呼之欲出。751Please respect copyright.PENANA0UvbhQLNXo
751Please respect copyright.PENANAGdV34fdKb9
M記就是他們所避忌的。751Please respect copyright.PENANAdECQFednsv
751Please respect copyright.PENANAmeiAGQryYU
這是個必須慎重回答的問題,假如我表示自己是以個人身份出席,即可解讀成阿花將我這個重要人物邀請來,而我就變成了M記的暫時代理人。751Please respect copyright.PENANAU18Kjbgz6X
751Please respect copyright.PENANAChxMdRVkpr
在這個場合亂認代理人,可不會發生什麼好事,否認才是正確的答案:751Please respect copyright.PENANAXXZt7P8W7a
751Please respect copyright.PENANA8xRNt50mwp
「Ah, no, I'm just as Mrs Chu's companion to attend tonight's dinner .」751Please respect copyright.PENANAHm1QPjxDn2
751Please respect copyright.PENANA0JNfzJaxs3
當然大貓也沒有因此鬆一口氣,為下一步更探的鑽探做好準備:751Please respect copyright.PENANAoKJ4J7F4zF
751Please respect copyright.PENANAzByrKNNEYr
「噢,那就真的太可惜了。若給貴公司知道Mr Bob你來到了今晚的聚會,大概會做成什麼不便吧?(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAvSukxzUB3J
751Please respect copyright.PENANA6lZKr9EpCs
「No problem.」我爽快地回答。751Please respect copyright.PENANAy7PzH73Mv1
大貓這隻老狐狸即是低調地笑一下,應該認為我是M記派來的斥候。他自覺得已經掌握到一定程度的情報,就稍微安心下來,就說兩句客套話:751Please respect copyright.PENANAYOf8ipK8hm
751Please respect copyright.PENANAtaJaGRX1Xq
「多年來我都對貴公司所知不多……今天卻難得與你見面,實在難免勾起了一點好奇心呢。(英語)」751Please respect copyright.PENANAfk12nnlvSD
751Please respect copyright.PENANAdLk4GMAwtt
為免被進一步質問更多自己不知道的問題,也考慮到他們對M記好像保持著尊重又害怕的謹慎態度,我開始摸索到自己掌握著多大的權力,就決定大膽斬斷他的發問權:751Please respect copyright.PENANAOZQpqLH2Pm
751Please respect copyright.PENANATBflC5vkDP
「I will like to join your conversation, but you should also know about my belongs enterprises, so I can not say more about this.」751Please respect copyright.PENANA7hMV5DFCHM
751Please respect copyright.PENANA5DsTkcqSok
說話當中,我盡量保持善意,留個好印象給他們,讓等等可以有機會隨意插話。751Please respect copyright.PENANAuwgBJPOYN8
751Please respect copyright.PENANAwsm2S03LD5
我開始感受到M記就似是為我套上一身肌肉一樣,令我有本錢在今晚為所欲為,而且得到大大的尊重。751Please respect copyright.PENANAHz4udOMKX2
751Please respect copyright.PENANAD28dFEgtTA
可能阿花也注定到這一點,就在此時發言:751Please respect copyright.PENANASvMF5mrVjz
751Please respect copyright.PENANAZJmeTMrxrE
「也對,我們可不是來這裡談公事的,讓我們繼續放鬆放鬆,但抱歉,我們先失陪一會兒。」751Please respect copyright.PENANAy6R8WWv8s3
751Please respect copyright.PENANAuLVomo9enT
從阿花的眼神,我知道她腦裡面已經盤算著大輪利用我M記經理身份找優勢的計劃,大貓點一點頭,我與她隨即離席。751Please respect copyright.PENANALkZ0uoKAAW
751Please respect copyright.PENANAe5cu4eoxvE
離開大廳的時候,我微微回頭,才發現原來不只是我們所在的一枱,旁邊幾枱的人們眼光,都有意無意注視在我身上。751Please respect copyright.PENANAMcxbSRAlwx
751Please respect copyright.PENANAAqkrXq8vWB
看來M記應該有些不可告人的驚人祕密,但拜此所賜,令我這個M記區域經理都可以係共濟會有頭有面……實在係痴撚線!751Please respect copyright.PENANAIoaxXBUEep
751Please respect copyright.PENANArzUvRXbDj8
751Please respect copyright.PENANA5cJVRddMb4
頂你個肺!捱左咁多年,總算捱出頭喇!今次我實有風駛盡利,惦鳩硬喇!!
751Please respect copyright.PENANA13OiRIa8D6
751Please respect copyright.PENANAv4mYWccqxC