無驚無險,又到六時半,在不知不覺之間,我已經逛了巴別塔近五個小時之多,中途不論仆街TB,超級駭客,甚至乎飛機頭都沒有進過來接近我房間一帶的地方。989Please respect copyright.PENANA5dJEHuJl4Q
989Please respect copyright.PENANAnG1xIqcyRw
就似是上天也感受到今晚將會發生一場暴風……所以特別為我準備一段漫長平靜一樣。989Please respect copyright.PENANApX767RL7is
989Please respect copyright.PENANA2Qy1Jn5IyK
經過今次長時間的詳細巡察,我才發現巴別塔有一個重大問題,就是分區問題,目前巴別塔就只有主討論區:【巴別塔討論區】,以及其分區:【巴別塔App談天區】。989Please respect copyright.PENANAMPYiXmcC3R
989Please respect copyright.PENANA0nkSQupK1z
在區域上,我參考了埃利都的做法,就是談天區的所有帖子都能在主討論區看得到,相反談天區就只能看到自己區內的帖子,以方便會員尋帖及增加每個帖的觀看率。989Please respect copyright.PENANA06xytKSpvx
989Please respect copyright.PENANAcWIleQO8fg
細心觀察下,首先巴別塔的人流已經上升到「一個不錯的水平」,帖子變得多元化是必定的,其次帖子的流動也變得急速,因此要找到某個帖子有時也是不容易的事。989Please respect copyright.PENANA8PUWZ5xdZ6
989Please respect copyright.PENANA14yonZpUE9
毫無疑問,現在是擴展的好時機,多開幾個分區對會員來說也算是個不錯的消息。989Please respect copyright.PENANAGUss2C5QYc
989Please respect copyright.PENANACLFVuxq8nc
但過多的分區又會使會員分散,所以這個舉動我必須慎重地決定。989Please respect copyright.PENANAhSBZjUUrGO
989Please respect copyright.PENANAuboRscFDUm
989Please respect copyright.PENANAwoaIVWjZmN
想到這裡,開往香港仔的巴士已經到達,我跟著大堆社會的齒輪上到一個奸商所製的超細罐頭裡。989Please respect copyright.PENANAnqCAtxxaRt
989Please respect copyright.PENANACd3SbG4jHX
車上的人多得過份,而且非常擠逼,搞得身為堂堂巴別塔創造主的本人像條誤闖沙甸魚群的海豚一樣,真失禮。989Please respect copyright.PENANAAdvY8z25qJ
989Please respect copyright.PENANAGqrM99JYne
一上到車,所有人都各自瞬速找個位置坐下,好死不死,到我選位的時候就只剩下兩個「關愛座」……989Please respect copyright.PENANAE0gL2KYqiK
989Please respect copyright.PENANAFasHr4gnyt
不知是哪個屎忽鬼想出這種鬼主意,明明只要有心,個個都是關愛座,為什麼要搞出這種特權意味甚重的「關愛座」啊?989Please respect copyright.PENANAhRb8B8ZPO2
989Please respect copyright.PENANArhJBPVmU8z
唉……算,一句到尾,現在這個時候究竟叫我坐還是不坐好?989Please respect copyright.PENANAj1Z6AjeuBH
989Please respect copyright.PENANAcm4XT6eSsz
考慮不夠四分一秒,一個龐大的身影在我旁邊閃過,二話不說就坐落我的兩個其中一個目標上,然後以滿口鄉音的廣東話大聲說:989Please respect copyright.PENANAdPt2Vtwg1S
989Please respect copyright.PENANAza5RlsmwUj
「阿霞!依度重有位啊!」989Please respect copyright.PENANA5crgLloEH1
989Please respect copyright.PENANAEL9gUkxIsa
她說完這話,我望一望她,是一個臉部肌肉已習慣黑面的疑似師奶物體,應她的召喚,一名微胖的中年女性忽然出現,二話不說就將我撞開,一下坐到另一個「關愛座」。989Please respect copyright.PENANAKfgBBf7IEk
989Please respect copyright.PENANAe78QTEcOgC
二人半眼都沒看過我,完全把我當成透明,將搶位置的事當成理所當然一樣,愉快地開始自己的話題:989Please respect copyright.PENANAhn8lhzYLv3
989Please respect copyright.PENANA0JCWKp2YmQ
「嘩,馨姐,真係唔該哂你啊!你真係快手既姐!」989Please respect copyright.PENANAkRTTTO91iz
989Please respect copyright.PENANAcvubZzT02v
我亦無謂站著阻到後面魚貫而進的其他乘客,快快走進後面的深處找個位置站好。989Please respect copyright.PENANAZWtKAQ4qj8
989Please respect copyright.PENANAM8Y2AC1AXb
可是兩個阿姐的閒談響遍全車,聽來實在比地盤噪音更令人心煩:989Please respect copyright.PENANAzjCI3KRZ6j
989Please respect copyright.PENANAnXX1hSBNdW
「哎喲,唔好咁講,係喇,你知唔知之後阿蓮佢啊……」989Please respect copyright.PENANAWmsZGLbZpT
989Please respect copyright.PENANArYC8KmOHJi
「才!咪係度講埋依D野啦!」989Please respect copyright.PENANAj8XQKP0Reo
989Please respect copyright.PENANAlFxrDOkCt6
「Black top blazin', hometown fadin'989Please respect copyright.PENANAo1RhoSr0iH
Out of sight in the rear view mirror989Please respect copyright.PENANA37bNUOMT7r
Stevie Ray blasting on the radio989Please respect copyright.PENANApDArFtpoo0
As I slam it into higher gear」989Please respect copyright.PENANAausAo6l89y
989Please respect copyright.PENANAXGPU0iz6Bu
當然兩位阿姐不會忽然說起英文來,這是我為了逃避兩隻怪物噪音而戴上耳筒所聽到的歌曲。989Please respect copyright.PENANAv32jgibwfV
989Please respect copyright.PENANAR15tmbLhxe
不久,巴士也上滿人了。989Please respect copyright.PENANALwaaFL5Mrd
989Please respect copyright.PENANAOQAED9EcSJ
它立即開動,啟程將我帶到籬漫著迷離黑霧的神祕島——鴨利洲,對岸一個叫香港仔的地方。989Please respect copyright.PENANAnq7XHd6Bom
989Please respect copyright.PENANA46QCR0F5BL
989Please respect copyright.PENANAO2eE78fdsO
經過了廿幾個站的旅程,加上中間路況不算暢順,讓我花了足足近四十分鐘才到達目的地。989Please respect copyright.PENANAUFYy56180O
989Please respect copyright.PENANApUpURsp2Yp
香港仔這個地方我來過好多次,其實細妹之前也提過,就是因為我有個住鴨利洲的姑媽。989Please respect copyright.PENANADcfURyP51i
989Please respect copyright.PENANATGEjmXvC0a
姑媽,即是我老豆的家姐,相比老母那邊的超級大家族,老豆的可說是非常迷你,只有三兄弟姊妹,姑媽最大,老豆排第二,下面還有個姑姐。989Please respect copyright.PENANAtpkg4iHVwh
989Please respect copyright.PENANApkwrRPDfus
整體來說,我對這邊的親戚並沒什麼反感,至少他們都很識做,新年利是夠大封,又不會問三問四,點到即止。989Please respect copyright.PENANAw4fgwJuHV6
989Please respect copyright.PENANAgFb5rEUYBi
而老母那邊……唉,不說了,反正只是題外話,而且一個十二兄弟姊妹連帶無數表親的巨型家族,我保證當中的八卦是複雜得任何人都不想去理解的。989Please respect copyright.PENANAPxyIgeROTz
989Please respect copyright.PENANAgLqXjw9ELh
除非我是某個大集團家族的富二代,或是將前額剃光,變成某個清朝的皇族吧。989Please respect copyright.PENANAFabThfRlbH
989Please respect copyright.PENANA7Mpso4BYGC
說來有點離題了,也許我應該說回姑媽的事。989Please respect copyright.PENANAZCe22krUWb
989Please respect copyright.PENANAbvWSS0WGkO
別與老母那邊的親戚相比,單單與其他我遇過的所有人相比,姑媽肯定在我頭十個最尊敬的人當中佔一席位。989Please respect copyright.PENANAIVEuED1lh4
989Please respect copyright.PENANAz3JiOPP2wh
她是個了不起的女人,在擁有不錯的事業同時,也擁有美滿的家庭,兩個兒子在她教育下,都有著不錯的成就,而且為人大方,每年新年給我的利是都大封得很。989Please respect copyright.PENANAOjbGARmUtP
989Please respect copyright.PENANAcum3Nc6fGm
但我已經好幾年沒見過她,也沒有收到大大封的利是,原因很簡單,因為她已經病死了。989Please respect copyright.PENANAaPYQ6lQ46x
989Please respect copyright.PENANAm3nicuXm0q
隨她去世後,她的大兒子音訊全無,聽說不知去了哪裡流浪。而小兒子則娶了個日本妹,與姑丈移民到日本開始新生活,她本人就選擇了海葬,隨海水遊遍世界。989Please respect copyright.PENANAiB55fXIe8l
989Please respect copyright.PENANAZ5QICfwJ0F
所以現在留在鴨利洲的,除了一些回憶外,就只剩下他們曾住過的單位。如非南華早報的事,我接下來的人生,大概都不會再踏足這個地方。989Please respect copyright.PENANA1jATQDWFtl
989Please respect copyright.PENANAZMGiDo5Fli
在回想這些事情的期間,時間已來到下午七時五十三分,而我在南記總店大門已等了差不多十分鐘,第一個巴別塔光明會的成員終於出現在我眼前,他就是Moscow killer,對他的外表,我還是只有「平凡」兩字可說。989Please respect copyright.PENANAYhHiTNKhDe
989Please respect copyright.PENANAOScO3YIuZQ
由於大部份溝通上的工作都是由四眼仔負責,作為巴別塔創造主的本人,理所當然就只是負責決策。989Please respect copyright.PENANANju2u8HqZI
989Please respect copyright.PENANAXUf9bV2UQ1
因此,一直以來,我對於巴別塔光明會成員的溝通都只局限於「有意義」的內容,簡單點來說,我們之間其實絕少,不,應該是根本完全沒有閒談。989Please respect copyright.PENANAitHKgSS88r
989Please respect copyright.PENANAv3RGLByPXP
所以這一刻,我們見面後除了簡單打個招呼,就什麼都沒有說了,然後沉默地並站在南記的門口,等待其他成員。989Please respect copyright.PENANAWl65pwY9CH
989Please respect copyright.PENANA3KgzNvX3Qw
見一時沒事做,我打開IPhone,看看巴別塔有沒有什麼有趣的東西看看。989Please respect copyright.PENANAB8T0RAD8wF
989Please respect copyright.PENANAz50Lp5uONt
結果,馬上就找到一個覺得挺有趣的帖子,標題是『[認真非吹水]我懷疑自己個仔同菲傭發生左肉體關係』,隨帖更附上一幅X凱琪的相片,讓我非常不爭氣地笑了。989Please respect copyright.PENANAd373mAkoZG
989Please respect copyright.PENANA5dkXjqSazb
按下『reply』將帖子展開,內容如下:989Please respect copyright.PENANAeWwLEa1s95
989Please respect copyright.PENANAesWOJQitz0
「(NAME:鐵血外交官)989Please respect copyright.PENANAuCM4e2Yv2y
是咁的,由於差唔多一年前果時,我老婆又開始返工,無乜時間做屋企野,一家三口,成間屋最常出現既就得我果個十五歲半既仔。989Please respect copyright.PENANAuzFcCupzUZ
989Please respect copyright.PENANAjaXT2DoqiV
老老實實你叫佢得閒煮下飯,照顧下自己都還可以,但要個思春期既靚仔幫你做家務,我好清楚根本就係天荒夜談!989Please respect copyright.PENANAjg4fuQsdlQ
989Please respect copyright.PENANAKimXrg9Mg6
所以唯一會惦掃把既我同老婆就成日為左家務既事鬧交。989Please respect copyright.PENANArAQoQDXwV9
989Please respect copyright.PENANAGogdb6YdWg
我老婆可能因為係公司受左d壓力,所以成日返到黎見到間屋有少少亂就對住我同個仔閪口閪面,又比說話我地聽,三日唔埋兩日就鬧交,搞到成日家嘈屋閉。989Please respect copyright.PENANAzW6ZCVXbER
989Please respect copyright.PENANAxMRzkPr8jf
於是我見屋企有D錢剩,個仔成日食公仔麵又好似唔係好健康,就把心一橫請左個菲傭返黎。989Please respect copyright.PENANAjJbKFzRdZ9
989Please respect copyright.PENANAJyvl0tWHTb
可能男人天性係咸濕D,所以我下意識揀左個睇落幾大波又後生(當然唔只大波,睇紀錄知佢手腳乾淨,做野又快又熟手又勤力先揀佢架炸)既菲傭返黎。989Please respect copyright.PENANAAwV4dxgmQA
989Please respect copyright.PENANAeQoqCrvZp6
點知佢第一日黎到,我即刻眼都凸埋,屌你佢對波簡直大鳩到痴撚線,阿叔見慣唔少大場面,但都忍唔住吞左幾啖口水。989Please respect copyright.PENANA0WkTaFC8Gd
989Please respect copyright.PENANAibeuU1Fr2B
不過算,我好清楚自己唔鐘意食朱古力,見佢又勤力又有禮貌就由得佢啦(無可能因為個菲傭太大波所以炒佢架嘛),咪比次機會人囉。989Please respect copyright.PENANAtZK2Ra69ja
989Please respect copyright.PENANAr5EU9rkL2W
咁佢做到而家一直都無乜問題,老婆又煩少左,日日返到屋企有飯食,就結果黎講都幾完滿啊。989Please respect copyright.PENANAxeCqnB6hcK
989Please respect copyright.PENANAnGV9ewd0Jk
點知我琴晚半夜屙尿既時候發現有個Condom係馬桶入面,應該係上一手無留意沖唔走。989Please respect copyright.PENANA3bGWm4S4Wp
989Please respect copyright.PENANAw6BQtesvqk
全間屋得兩個男人,咪話我先入為主,我有無扑過野我自己最清楚啦。989Please respect copyright.PENANAUTNRXqyKSO
989Please respect copyright.PENANArzDIa1ZT7Y
咁係我好肯定自己無扑過野既前題下,你話個Condom係邊個留低既,無論如果我都只諗到一個人,就係個衰仔……989Please respect copyright.PENANAI7nWzDgMZu
989Please respect copyright.PENANAPUO6RNfjot
雖然鐵證如山,但我依然選擇呃自己其實琴晚係發夢,不過今朝食早餐既時候我先發現原來阿仔份早餐大份過我(明明我得一隻蛋,但佢有兩隻),佢又成日對住個菲傭笑笑口,舊朱古力又同佢打左個眼色,好明顯就有路啦!989Please respect copyright.PENANAbdBPqjNzSO
989Please respect copyright.PENANApvPb0uOgNv
各位巴打你地話而家點算好?我應該唔聲唔聲炒左個菲傭定點?」989Please respect copyright.PENANAnwniOR1asc
989Please respect copyright.PENANAcytnFw156C
看罷我第一個感覺是,這篇帖主要是發泄對老婆不滿多於關心阿仔同菲傭有沒有扑野,不過他確實寫得真的幾新奇又過癮,加上標題也吸引人的眼球,所以得到不少回覆:989Please respect copyright.PENANAghKtA3Ksje
989Please respect copyright.PENANAeo4x5usWuB
「或者你個仔戴Condom打飛機呢?唔洗緊張喎。(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAHuSQ6eL4wh
989Please respect copyright.PENANAjnPIk7VwOm
「應該係你第二個人格好撚鐘意食朱古力,所以偷偷地襯你訓著走去搞鳩阿菲傭姐姐啊(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAZg5gS8yfrl
989Please respect copyright.PENANAqltfytPPGy
「Fight Club!(NAME:快樂殺人狂)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAXfMBvNfVUs
989Please respect copyright.PENANAr1D3JjLnjr
「其實呢……無圖好難討論既,我識面相,可以幫你睇下佢個樣有無扑過野既跡象。(NAME:蘇民鋒)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAvbdiLvAsF3
989Please respect copyright.PENANAcQ1bmrUHJQ
「屌你老母仆街仔,賓妹都岩?(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANA86VyIh9RKX
989Please respect copyright.PENANA2fD1vbB6jU
「其實賓妹真係好熱情,又乜撚都玩得,打真軍又得,後花園又玩得,識玩一定玩賓妹(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANA2JFnbrW0dj
989Please respect copyright.PENANAZW3smK9leX
「賓妹都有打手!?(NAME:K.Leo)」989Please respect copyright.PENANApufVqxuQCA
989Please respect copyright.PENANALMR0Mob0YG
「我覺得依條友應該真係屌過囉(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANA0XwGBbgNLb
989Please respect copyright.PENANAMx1bRDboIO
「樓主有無考慮過同個仔玩3P?(NAME:龍王哥)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAFQ0EQplt17
989Please respect copyright.PENANADQg4zRHB01
「賓妹唔係人啊?賓妹對波唔係波啊?圖呢!仆街!(NAME:簫風)」989Please respect copyright.PENANABLNX2Rc9vu
989Please respect copyright.PENANAxkd5n2WX62
「簫風巴打真係痴撚線,連賓妹都唔放過,果然係我地戒J界既典範(NAME:無各)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAzfUOqY4nx2
989Please respect copyright.PENANAOP2biOZTyT
「依個Post好明顯係黑暗戒J界既陰謀,想引一眾巴打一展龍威……989Please respect copyright.PENANAKhda36PzJy
Btw睇完篇野硬左,我係咪唔正常?(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAjpGxguepFL
989Please respect copyright.PENANANufiMl9NPv
「認真既巴打,我覺得你應該同老婆商量下先,依個係一個好嚴重既問題。(NAME:無名)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAE4Nc5JgBsM
989Please respect copyright.PENANANf40zrgy7e
「大波賓妹,嘔(NAME:津巴布偉富豪)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAPYwhFlAvel
989Please respect copyright.PENANA1qANETW0Yh
「成班大驚小怪,同賓妹扑野成撚日都會有架啦,我勸樓主咪鳩搞得太大啊,一陣比佢告鳩你個仔強姦你就仆街喇(NAME:VitoCorleone)」989Please respect copyright.PENANAo6fnWRSFO5
989Please respect copyright.PENANAW572JllkYD
「其實咁既,我覺得係你份人比較小氣加埋有幻覺姐,最可以幫到你既係醫生,而唔係巴別塔啊。(NAME:叉雞飯)」989Please respect copyright.PENANANq6Mscakaz
989Please respect copyright.PENANA4HNgweNoxx
「首先我無可能貼一個同自己個仔扑過野既菲傭上黎,其次,我唔係痴左線,我好肯定真係親眼見到個Condom……」989Please respect copyright.PENANAM3l3mnG4PH
989Please respect copyright.PENANAYjWu2NZCBo
看這個來自樓主的回覆不到一半,我即被現實世界的一把聲音打斷:989Please respect copyright.PENANAmokWnexZhc
989Please respect copyright.PENANALOAStvWnXo
「Hay,ABC,得你兩個炸?」989Please respect copyright.PENANAuAwg6ZAbDp
989Please respect copyright.PENANALoUcYvOICp
是四眼仔,望都不用望,單憑聲音就知道,看看時間,現在剛好是八時正,非常符合他準時的風格。989Please respect copyright.PENANAUby3YVPWgG
989Please respect copyright.PENANA8U3f1X5uIk
我抬頭望向他,淡淡地回應:989Please respect copyright.PENANAsLdK7yNdBv
989Please respect copyright.PENANAeDkv78xjUh
「係啊,佢地都唔知有無時間觀念既。」989Please respect copyright.PENANA6qXSy5ognd
989Please respect copyright.PENANAsleL09OOM4
Moscow killer則繼續保持沉默,觀望住我與四眼仔的對話。989Please respect copyright.PENANAwxR6aDddii
989Please respect copyright.PENANAttVP2MqA08
四眼仔聽到我的回應,馬上看看自己的手提電話,打開whatsapp重新確認資訊,再回答我的問題:989Please respect copyright.PENANA8FphYJIAjJ
989Please respect copyright.PENANAe0if63Iz7M
「唔係啊,佢地話一早到左等緊你地喎。」989Please respect copyright.PENANAvZixARkAm8
989Please respect copyright.PENANA95iKyecD0p
我左望右望,都不見其他人,垃圾筒裡都完全不見超級駭客的蹤影,於是反問四眼仔:989Please respect copyright.PENANA16VpngZ4wm
989Please respect copyright.PENANAjMCT1anZDl
「下?咁佢地而家係邊?」989Please respect copyright.PENANAXF45G3rITG
989Please respect copyright.PENANAz5hJTtuQLN
這個時候,Moscow killer居然主動插話:「唔通……」989Please respect copyright.PENANAG8Rfw0sheq
989Please respect copyright.PENANAY6HawuwnhU
989Please respect copyright.PENANAXileCEPn0v
我與四眼仔立即望向他,期待一個不可思議的答案……989Please respect copyright.PENANA7wgQerbypn
989Please respect copyright.PENANAiWLXPMTFpp
989Please respect copyright.PENANA2ho3tfN6xJ