
天亮,上班。235Please respect copyright.PENANA2AoZNk6B58
235Please respect copyright.PENANAq3LFtuP0iD
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。235Please respect copyright.PENANABoDuSk5cyA
235Please respect copyright.PENANAQNtDSdlJSh
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。235Please respect copyright.PENANAFtNY5uF0pF
235Please respect copyright.PENANAYGFSptjA3p
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。235Please respect copyright.PENANAUjtm5XL00h
235Please respect copyright.PENANAWvLqSRPFQq
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。235Please respect copyright.PENANALQIO4BuXHI
235Please respect copyright.PENANA6F7NpPhh39
看不見,罷。235Please respect copyright.PENANAE2iiwHiqnT
天黑,下班。235Please respect copyright.PENANAfBerGdaXGR
235Please respect copyright.PENANAMGu8rQotaB
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。235Please respect copyright.PENANAdXlhlWQ5mM
235Please respect copyright.PENANADF67DUjAuh
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。235Please respect copyright.PENANAoRPdsCkhVz
235Please respect copyright.PENANAHFKlFRbxcu
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……235Please respect copyright.PENANA2WyTid5Y8y
235Please respect copyright.PENANAk27rMpqz7E
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。235Please respect copyright.PENANAOyXZtGOQ94
235Please respect copyright.PENANA6eAUhIoM23
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」235Please respect copyright.PENANAHCudl0mdkX
235Please respect copyright.PENANAi3i6WaNYZg
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。235Please respect copyright.PENANAPvGn3EWbCF
公司,午飯時間。235Please respect copyright.PENANAuc6ro23b0q
235Please respect copyright.PENANAMbaZHfhI0o
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……235Please respect copyright.PENANAGQ2krAkGX1
235Please respect copyright.PENANAgAvnSDpNRe
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?235Please respect copyright.PENANA90KC95oILV
235Please respect copyright.PENANAmCO5b2lOz7
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。235Please respect copyright.PENANAgeJackFikE
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。235Please respect copyright.PENANAg5nY976Wbc
235Please respect copyright.PENANAnlx022Tdw2
還是……235Please respect copyright.PENANA5ItikYe49L
235Please respect copyright.PENANACEt1KDGbM2
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!235Please respect copyright.PENANAQdtuouNKqj
公司,工作。235Please respect copyright.PENANAUzd16HBPD6
235Please respect copyright.PENANA5SQbjtfNcW
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。235Please respect copyright.PENANADggDfxwIzG
235Please respect copyright.PENANA9UbiHGBLeg
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。235Please respect copyright.PENANAHJkhOTU42H
235Please respect copyright.PENANAgNqgPs4rGm
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。235Please respect copyright.PENANAqGv4qJ36Md
235Please respect copyright.PENANA3ln084ZLgX
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。235Please respect copyright.PENANAqO9L3LIhme
235Please respect copyright.PENANAfjmBg2wpxW
快意,笑了。235Please respect copyright.PENANAbjkx9v3mTH
酒吧,喝酒。235Please respect copyright.PENANABdqFSvXpj6
235Please respect copyright.PENANAdAx3Q1dDXx
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。235Please respect copyright.PENANAalk6tt3UUC
235Please respect copyright.PENANAf4hfMT5ZCt
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。235Please respect copyright.PENANAEsqzXCjYhG
235Please respect copyright.PENANAnqIBey2Up0
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。235Please respect copyright.PENANA2NNczWfHfc
235Please respect copyright.PENANAQLYPsQLCme
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。235Please respect copyright.PENANAyumjgmwHhd
235Please respect copyright.PENANAul880N1fJa
醉倒。235Please respect copyright.PENANATYOz4Dg4W1
235Please respect copyright.PENANAKj8ZqPznm9
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……235Please respect copyright.PENANA4p7ZcRuYXR
235Please respect copyright.PENANAL1OHMSjZS3
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」235Please respect copyright.PENANAELChRyX90F
235Please respect copyright.PENANAKAmrwSjxhd
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。235Please respect copyright.PENANAsv71EWaP4Q
假期,醫院。235Please respect copyright.PENANA29oFLyqDse
235Please respect copyright.PENANAyWF6pIokmi
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。235Please respect copyright.PENANAFco2cBCTjS
235Please respect copyright.PENANAgXsvxWTovF
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。235Please respect copyright.PENANAHufWshasGv
235Please respect copyright.PENANAimylLzG5Vj
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」235Please respect copyright.PENANAA4tUYIavEJ
235Please respect copyright.PENANAg0d1tjuMIm
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。235Please respect copyright.PENANANloDiDHfUY
235Please respect copyright.PENANAUyA8pdvKcD
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。235Please respect copyright.PENANAIiz6UWSUP9
235Please respect copyright.PENANAZXFJkbv1pU
死寂。235Please respect copyright.PENANAEjEdkv1DwE
235Please respect copyright.PENANAY3dlAWjtps
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。235Please respect copyright.PENANAG3ZZ9PN9SO
回家,晚飯。235Please respect copyright.PENANAgMNdv1rQk8
235Please respect copyright.PENANABNVQeqTx1s
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。235Please respect copyright.PENANAMRn2AId8mn
235Please respect copyright.PENANAKDVQ378QpV
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」235Please respect copyright.PENANAMvZPUZ3Jvi
235Please respect copyright.PENANA6tK3JrpdDp
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。235Please respect copyright.PENANAyOlwUBISNy
235Please respect copyright.PENANAakDm5GQn4s
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?235Please respect copyright.PENANAbbLPmt4OIY
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。235Please respect copyright.PENANAdrt7qPSYOB
235Please respect copyright.PENANAGIiyvoDjZq
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。235Please respect copyright.PENANAV2DIrkPamA
235Please respect copyright.PENANAf97ohVBB2B
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。235Please respect copyright.PENANAq0gJcvm41E
235Please respect copyright.PENANAibHGWBoGRW
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。235Please respect copyright.PENANAHmg007cppd
男友家,床上。235Please respect copyright.PENANAggnzGVNQ1X
235Please respect copyright.PENANAp30ikFsSDI
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。235Please respect copyright.PENANA92xbQpdHJ0
235Please respect copyright.PENANAm0YFGnzJyQ
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。235Please respect copyright.PENANAO5RDWTGlKV
235Please respect copyright.PENANACq6kpF3AAF
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」235Please respect copyright.PENANATbVbJ1NeAa
235Please respect copyright.PENANAiX3EhjX7ac
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……235Please respect copyright.PENANA9Qe44kWTK7
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。235Please respect copyright.PENANAfY2REsmHst
235Please respect copyright.PENANAthugmUKz2R
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。235Please respect copyright.PENANAy7AZiSTBKY
235Please respect copyright.PENANA4cVZ9WlXNv
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。235Please respect copyright.PENANAqZjgGk6h0i
235Please respect copyright.PENANAZkUgA06MT4
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。235Please respect copyright.PENANAWzGf4VNruW
235Please respect copyright.PENANATtm5VpKssg
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。235Please respect copyright.PENANAamOJUOEzxn
235Please respect copyright.PENANACePUU2mnBv
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。235Please respect copyright.PENANAA9QIzd50Ti
235Please respect copyright.PENANAEoacLORRZz
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。235Please respect copyright.PENANAoLF8bpgulk
235Please respect copyright.PENANAPKZEIcIRd7
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。235Please respect copyright.PENANA2OYE7Em58M
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。235Please respect copyright.PENANALqSUgbccdt
235Please respect copyright.PENANA1OOiRjwhdK
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」235Please respect copyright.PENANA0v4aN4eKoX
235Please respect copyright.PENANAeMyD9HY62s
「在你體內。」235Please respect copyright.PENANAOXtxm78GkI
235Please respect copyright.PENANA5oDASJiLtr
「甚麼?」235Please respect copyright.PENANArm2jJAEMeo
235Please respect copyright.PENANAjhGEtWpgZx
「蟻。」235Please respect copyright.PENANA7cn6deU09u
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。235Please respect copyright.PENANAtjwspFEmtI
235Please respect copyright.PENANA2r5GAWMH9y
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!235Please respect copyright.PENANAZy6U0sCUyf
235Please respect copyright.PENANAECJEcZ6msm
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。235Please respect copyright.PENANAp4zWOoZlL3
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。235Please respect copyright.PENANAK9c0mRlmAe
235Please respect copyright.PENANAMoIxTKIN8H
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。235Please respect copyright.PENANAqcdSKxGY3M
235Please respect copyright.PENANAqXWmI9zjdT
「誰?」另一聲音反問。235Please respect copyright.PENANAyXXCHxs8Zc
235Please respect copyright.PENANAqrQcG4cgeg
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」235Please respect copyright.PENANA9kxQOc6RSC
235Please respect copyright.PENANAwF2Bk2V1ja
靜。235Please respect copyright.PENANAIuIGAMQgPU
235Please respect copyright.PENANAUtmqVWKJS6
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。235Please respect copyright.PENANAOISpeife9q
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」235Please respect copyright.PENANAfAPK1J01Ne
235Please respect copyright.PENANAtcI4kTBelp
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」235Please respect copyright.PENANAyMM8ftnFMU
235Please respect copyright.PENANAazhfz8FJyP
我:「我有精神病?」235Please respect copyright.PENANAiemyPaJS1u
235Please respect copyright.PENANASHW3OEexjk
醫:「是情緒病。」235Please respect copyright.PENANAIm8uIWn7jB
235Please respect copyright.PENANAutfc9PVsh8
我:「怎麼辦?」235Please respect copyright.PENANA2meswJrKkr
235Please respect copyright.PENANAmrtsnukmuu
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」235Please respect copyright.PENANAhdIOTxxU2d
235Please respect copyright.PENANA6jClexGPtQ
我:「謝謝醫生。」235Please respect copyright.PENANAuIm1jwlIaN
235Please respect copyright.PENANArST4OXAEkf
醫:「不用謝。」235Please respect copyright.PENANADTQ5WE3q7x
235Please respect copyright.PENANAT1WRb0BWvH
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。235Please respect copyright.PENANAC04mrdl3UJ
235Please respect copyright.PENANAc9CkMs6nsk
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。235Please respect copyright.PENANAT4M2lwe9Wv
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?235Please respect copyright.PENANAKpw32NbuiW
235Please respect copyright.PENANAtSsZ4oS29x
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;235Please respect copyright.PENANA51JOkPWhzv
235Please respect copyright.PENANAgeWACKfS0C
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;235Please respect copyright.PENANA8OJYnSwquz
235Please respect copyright.PENANAZSpFwTWJgN
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;235Please respect copyright.PENANAsbB0Fjz5fv
235Please respect copyright.PENANAD47IL6VVmZ
……235Please respect copyright.PENANASZ8mYtu0ri
235Please respect copyright.PENANAYkaeAs2Psb
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。235Please respect copyright.PENANAEgg7GBzB0S
235Please respect copyright.PENANANijsaqDfJu
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……
註:此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規,煩請創挑主通知,願刪文。235Please respect copyright.PENANAGad0xScmUP