
天亮,上班。280Please respect copyright.PENANAjrCXrsB9z3
280Please respect copyright.PENANAPpm3BVJNPF
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。280Please respect copyright.PENANAk0PpMZNWZw
280Please respect copyright.PENANAr9Rlrz094C
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。280Please respect copyright.PENANAVXsavZF4uK
280Please respect copyright.PENANAwtC24Rofgo
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。280Please respect copyright.PENANARhrDF9JihA
280Please respect copyright.PENANAXKXU7tMz7m
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。280Please respect copyright.PENANAXQJb1n2COq
280Please respect copyright.PENANAjapQHj0bXH
看不見,罷。280Please respect copyright.PENANAbCiW8UIheI
天黑,下班。280Please respect copyright.PENANAs6apqBw6Gd
280Please respect copyright.PENANAtXk9B1OgN1
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。280Please respect copyright.PENANAAvLLl6a9op
280Please respect copyright.PENANAQIF6G6HnfL
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。280Please respect copyright.PENANAjJhBPrj4Sr
280Please respect copyright.PENANAd3VZChAmmL
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……280Please respect copyright.PENANAKKxV4soj88
280Please respect copyright.PENANAw68bXLbH4I
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。280Please respect copyright.PENANAx3B7IF69Dc
280Please respect copyright.PENANAS5sUlYogJc
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」280Please respect copyright.PENANAxJAzP2P0S4
280Please respect copyright.PENANAKOok7V30cC
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。280Please respect copyright.PENANA30m1HomMui
公司,午飯時間。280Please respect copyright.PENANANXaOPOmNYh
280Please respect copyright.PENANASmj5xi6F7O
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……280Please respect copyright.PENANAmOMRVYSSRu
280Please respect copyright.PENANAvQpNpPmeNB
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?280Please respect copyright.PENANAhEZDLxCpRE
280Please respect copyright.PENANAtijeHK04mG
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。280Please respect copyright.PENANAltJx0WJxMk
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。280Please respect copyright.PENANAvJAhNlkRCg
280Please respect copyright.PENANA1LZVmOzbfj
還是……280Please respect copyright.PENANAtdoABWw9iQ
280Please respect copyright.PENANAc3b8eMiPIz
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!280Please respect copyright.PENANAc8poGglLoh
公司,工作。280Please respect copyright.PENANAQuvdml07sV
280Please respect copyright.PENANAz9ahGFaSoN
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。280Please respect copyright.PENANAtzYymaOw8P
280Please respect copyright.PENANAb4UwOEYVb7
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。280Please respect copyright.PENANAoJBhP0TBz0
280Please respect copyright.PENANA91DuXk1Obq
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。280Please respect copyright.PENANANXdUoBiZTP
280Please respect copyright.PENANAwKMNHLceo3
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。280Please respect copyright.PENANAi6ludocYmJ
280Please respect copyright.PENANAcbqWU332m5
快意,笑了。280Please respect copyright.PENANA6IdsnadkUA
酒吧,喝酒。280Please respect copyright.PENANAA16PO9eVgs
280Please respect copyright.PENANAL2UQtG17xM
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。280Please respect copyright.PENANAEEKUfgcUTQ
280Please respect copyright.PENANACWcJOPYeGU
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。280Please respect copyright.PENANALsSbRa67FH
280Please respect copyright.PENANAJqxZYaem2U
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。280Please respect copyright.PENANAqRODXAVEBq
280Please respect copyright.PENANAYsGL9rx9tN
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。280Please respect copyright.PENANANII1rqEUKu
280Please respect copyright.PENANAKdLM7dD4t8
醉倒。280Please respect copyright.PENANARhOeoFXMB9
280Please respect copyright.PENANAlubHUnKhIO
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……280Please respect copyright.PENANAvp8KLPmmDR
280Please respect copyright.PENANA8UIy9seie2
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」280Please respect copyright.PENANANdq8txGejX
280Please respect copyright.PENANArl1iy490Bs
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。280Please respect copyright.PENANAr3vWqhzvsw
假期,醫院。280Please respect copyright.PENANAAwi5Lhmzsz
280Please respect copyright.PENANAbD48OsuJY3
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。280Please respect copyright.PENANAIVbfI0jGDt
280Please respect copyright.PENANAC1ji1GmY6u
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。280Please respect copyright.PENANAtkIEgcNn57
280Please respect copyright.PENANAdRaCQfPiIm
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」280Please respect copyright.PENANAPsXPPMYqQr
280Please respect copyright.PENANAQrmijcwgmG
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。280Please respect copyright.PENANAZvQj5rDvJf
280Please respect copyright.PENANAJAsmY7qUTW
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。280Please respect copyright.PENANAGrdcSC4TKX
280Please respect copyright.PENANAomQnc4inIS
死寂。280Please respect copyright.PENANARb4f28PILb
280Please respect copyright.PENANA7PJpg2Azsg
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。280Please respect copyright.PENANATi2mZjUPVc
回家,晚飯。280Please respect copyright.PENANAjTHvPmya6i
280Please respect copyright.PENANABCJgfCvsTe
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。280Please respect copyright.PENANATNQChGyvk7
280Please respect copyright.PENANAY0iZAbC9Vu
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」280Please respect copyright.PENANAY5Hx9EKEKN
280Please respect copyright.PENANAoxZMztnAjv
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。280Please respect copyright.PENANAMF3v7iXhby
280Please respect copyright.PENANAX5oatxyf5c
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?280Please respect copyright.PENANAoEOsUKdlYK
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。280Please respect copyright.PENANAdWHtB68UpH
280Please respect copyright.PENANAKjL9G7uIuO
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。280Please respect copyright.PENANAxdTelvydPf
280Please respect copyright.PENANALSKmTgi6um
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。280Please respect copyright.PENANAx3yvBYGtxY
280Please respect copyright.PENANAOqdGA4jdMp
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。280Please respect copyright.PENANAorsDmdm7nP
男友家,床上。280Please respect copyright.PENANABITpLJ2EOh
280Please respect copyright.PENANAVn6qfPbGmR
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。280Please respect copyright.PENANAEmUhkyqN0G
280Please respect copyright.PENANAJXqfVijObh
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。280Please respect copyright.PENANARygndRA9Ai
280Please respect copyright.PENANAGGgRVHNFDK
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」280Please respect copyright.PENANAXgjLER2xiE
280Please respect copyright.PENANANfhjl7WcFC
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……280Please respect copyright.PENANA25qJknbt9B
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。280Please respect copyright.PENANADL82ZyQUO9
280Please respect copyright.PENANAOiaqbmiugP
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。280Please respect copyright.PENANAvsyyRMz6aD
280Please respect copyright.PENANAgbCmHnZKHc
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。280Please respect copyright.PENANAb6sCN6uYVY
280Please respect copyright.PENANAElWd0bAdQi
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。280Please respect copyright.PENANAYOTEAHcQQc
280Please respect copyright.PENANAXR72l5UGWC
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。280Please respect copyright.PENANAUp2KKE7M1s
280Please respect copyright.PENANAXqlSooIkP5
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。280Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9S8OfKZzD
280Please respect copyright.PENANApVnPNlP8DE
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。280Please respect copyright.PENANAJgxdwnvtRG
280Please respect copyright.PENANAgBn2bnHF7u
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。280Please respect copyright.PENANAHrtbpJr6Hx
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。280Please respect copyright.PENANABmPqHxerdY
280Please respect copyright.PENANADlC5w4Bfh5
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」280Please respect copyright.PENANAsE48jhEGs8
280Please respect copyright.PENANAbyUTlMb4ZT
「在你體內。」280Please respect copyright.PENANAFvVg1Mhwd9
280Please respect copyright.PENANAdJyJppwAgn
「甚麼?」280Please respect copyright.PENANAFnpPxBL4Xm
280Please respect copyright.PENANAumjt8dLzh0
「蟻。」280Please respect copyright.PENANAO81xeYHQB3
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。280Please respect copyright.PENANAoSK4Si2nLD
280Please respect copyright.PENANAKn9aELulSR
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!280Please respect copyright.PENANAcRtG2k7EF0
280Please respect copyright.PENANA6LOoeAe7O3
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。280Please respect copyright.PENANAuGhhNJhFuN
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。280Please respect copyright.PENANAjVb4z7hdDM
280Please respect copyright.PENANAV6ZtwdpK4m
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。280Please respect copyright.PENANAmb5QhWfSXQ
280Please respect copyright.PENANAgPWoQch9kj
「誰?」另一聲音反問。280Please respect copyright.PENANAHTNqnbyz04
280Please respect copyright.PENANA3Fhr6A4eD3
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」280Please respect copyright.PENANAWd0VLUOgUj
280Please respect copyright.PENANABczmeGnCLe
靜。280Please respect copyright.PENANAwbrRo5cEEI
280Please respect copyright.PENANAPaYE0TLEfA
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。280Please respect copyright.PENANAhdUwPDOZf0
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」280Please respect copyright.PENANAR1Z4dV8STZ
280Please respect copyright.PENANA230tnxi0V2
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」280Please respect copyright.PENANAYv317et7TI
280Please respect copyright.PENANAgK23jRMEI4
我:「我有精神病?」280Please respect copyright.PENANA9oSShzTyVy
280Please respect copyright.PENANAQFifT9HTLV
醫:「是情緒病。」280Please respect copyright.PENANAGl6AEZinGL
280Please respect copyright.PENANAAb5GD2iCjp
我:「怎麼辦?」280Please respect copyright.PENANA3oogkixiWh
280Please respect copyright.PENANAYQy9o4FGho
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」280Please respect copyright.PENANA7jUemREsRu
280Please respect copyright.PENANAJAcTzHO1vU
我:「謝謝醫生。」280Please respect copyright.PENANAi1s6kP7cmw
280Please respect copyright.PENANAOQImLAjFqD
醫:「不用謝。」280Please respect copyright.PENANA1nMIcnppOm
280Please respect copyright.PENANAehPTrgGxrp
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。280Please respect copyright.PENANAG9B87BCzoj
280Please respect copyright.PENANAXa5VDkiYVX
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。280Please respect copyright.PENANASfHszJ58bn
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?280Please respect copyright.PENANA3NC02B5d6Z
280Please respect copyright.PENANAqriQBQqf5S
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;280Please respect copyright.PENANA09EHZnxsj6
280Please respect copyright.PENANAGTyYADf1a4
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;280Please respect copyright.PENANA6izn5UVMXu
280Please respect copyright.PENANA4F3h25uEqN
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;280Please respect copyright.PENANAx9BQbcBgsA
280Please respect copyright.PENANAtLx8pI7DlS
……280Please respect copyright.PENANAJDCkUCXjPK
280Please respect copyright.PENANAKvhOTlBtRJ
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。280Please respect copyright.PENANA6gvN6rmDZq
280Please respect copyright.PENANAdkmU9ENDjI
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……
註:此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規,煩請創挑主通知,願刪文。280Please respect copyright.PENANA9W8vDjZnZk