「世界要毀滅了,可是我喜歡你。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAbNPUfYUZgz
423Please respect copyright.PENANAJ2Xf5IHRWz
再次用那過於老舊但還堪用的懷表確認時間後,我說。423Please respect copyright.PENANAky8KGExPZd
423Please respect copyright.PENANAoUQmWees55
這樣的話語,想必不襯這春光明媚、風和日麗的下午茶宴吧。無論是傳達噩耗,更別說緊接著在那之後的表白心意,都該選擇更有那樣情調的場合才對。423Please respect copyright.PENANAic6NTorKW1
423Please respect copyright.PENANAnyEPLtCbny
像是無雲滿月的夜空下,由傾倒的大樓所構成的廢墟中,沾染塵埃,顫抖著相擁的男女主角帶著哭腔確認彼此的心意,最終步向結局——423Please respect copyright.PENANAbbtvQHvQwT
423Please respect copyright.PENANAZ04S7vKTAi
這樣的安排做為災難片的結尾應該再恰當不過。但,假如考慮到女主角的話,那果然像現在散發著愜意氛圍的午後才更合適。423Please respect copyright.PENANAXzWHAsb798
423Please respect copyright.PENANAJV2JvGpbNv
坐在對座的,是位長相清秀的少女。423Please respect copyright.PENANAvoI5EN0doJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAxyxQOHVBMp
端著純白色茶杯啜著紅茶的她,形狀姣好的嘴角無時無刻都帶著完美的微笑,像是和煦陽光下吹拂而過的微風,輕柔而舒暢。而這副樣貌就如同理所當然的適合她。423Please respect copyright.PENANAjDHLe8biQi
423Please respect copyright.PENANAVrWE8ElHrx
當然,以個人而言,還是希望她至少在我表白後,能稍稍在那抹微笑中,混入那怕些許紅霞。儘管那不可能。
423Please respect copyright.PENANA614VGkZv7M
423Please respect copyright.PENANAGnpz5ozMa7
就在昨天,世界被宣布將要毀滅。原因是什麼,我也不太清楚。423Please respect copyright.PENANAfbrx4AHgWz
423Please respect copyright.PENANAFJNgxny0JX
總之人類再也無法在地球上活下去,無論原因是隕石墜落、行星爆炸,或者外星人入侵都一樣。我沒想在世界毀滅前,還多費時間去理解就算理解也無能為力的事實。只不過在新聞報導中講解的博士,聲音既無力又悵然,大概是在困惑自己為何還得在世界末日的前一天接受採訪。僅是那副樣貌莫名讓我理解到,「啊,一切都結束了」。423Please respect copyright.PENANAYRtKMA0n4h
423Please respect copyright.PENANAgRBcWtrSAG
外面亂成了一團。前一天還平凡安穩的城市,此刻卻充塞著怒吼與哭號,槍響及鬥毆聲。不過,說實話我並不意外,或許是因為過去也曾數次接觸過這城市被掩蓋的陰暗面的緣故。423Please respect copyright.PENANAfvVLQT91Mx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAguY7uwtwYs
我想到自己的工作,然後再想到那些身為上流社會的雇主。423Please respect copyright.PENANA1a5DpMLP3b
423Please respect copyright.PENANAW0aEvwyjfu
就算世界毀滅,總還是有人能找到方法活下來。以現今人類的科技,應該能對這樣殘酷的現實作出某種程度的反抗。但那與什麼都不是的自己無關,我將與地球上其餘同樣無能為力的幾十億人一同滅亡。423Please respect copyright.PENANALk7TYeEHTq
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYiPI80p1jo
想通後的第一個反應是想哭,可真窩囊。儘管用槍用刀了結了那麼多性命都毫無感觸,但面臨不可理喻的狀況淚腺就會變得脆弱,那是我直到最後也改不過來的壞毛病。423Please respect copyright.PENANAaXWeyVzwWB
423Please respect copyright.PENANARdYsHy0dJQ
雖然事到如今也無所謂了,不過在哭之前,我想起了一件非做不可的事。423Please respect copyright.PENANA0uZFSfVIFD
423Please respect copyright.PENANAO6ZVzmqhCY
我拿起電話,撥了她的號碼。423Please respect copyright.PENANAqXiSUsdiip
423Please respect copyright.PENANAGFs09x5K21
撥號聲響了一秒,兩秒——當確切意識到壽命的界線時,就連僅僅剎那的等待都嫌浪費。等到心中默數超過十秒後,對方才終於慢悠悠地接起。423Please respect copyright.PENANAhYW5mCasDV
423Please respect copyright.PENANA1Ex4oJLqKy
「喂?」423Please respect copyright.PENANA4DKBvGVgyq
423Please respect copyright.PENANAzEFq4Apaao
通過聽筒響起的,是從數位轉成類比訊號,略帶點雜訊的她的聲音。就算在這超現實的時候,只有她的聲音一如往常的沉穩,一如往常的悅耳。423Please respect copyright.PENANAjrFsMbtmvu
423Please respect copyright.PENANAZWVaukIpcm
「我有話要對妳說。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAeUUGqb6HFv
423Please respect copyright.PENANAjrL0LJ3kCN
相較之下,我的聲音快哭出來似的又破又啞。不過,在她面前自卑也不是一天兩天的事。再說,外頭被觸動防盜警鈴的汽車響個不停,或許她也沒怎麼聽清楚。423Please respect copyright.PENANA3fEutnP8NI
423Please respect copyright.PENANA7LvZRJWDYH
「那就說吧。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA9t4JzYL5Qd
423Please respect copyright.PENANA0SCgOaAz9L
她的話語太過愜意,對於還陷在混亂中的我而言,那樣的聲音彷彿使我離現實又遠了一點。423Please respect copyright.PENANAykFuu4EMue
423Please respect copyright.PENANAT71by8CfQB
「是非得和妳見一面才能說的,很重要的事。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAcIQIWXMFyx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAMJFyYYDjiM
「我還以為你是那種效率至上,更理性點的人。怎麼了,最近看了什麼羅曼史小說嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAKgSMxijBfz
423Please respect copyright.PENANAd5mF2f1dOp
啊,果然那種無時無刻維持從容的態度令人煩躁。在別人扯著嗓子哭喊怨嘆也不奇怪的狀況下,她還能雲淡風輕的笑著,只是自顧自地活著。423Please respect copyright.PENANAr0PQ6spJm3
423Please respect copyright.PENANAlRJg24WmuX
那只能說不可思議了吧,而從前就喜歡上這樣的她的我也同樣如此。423Please respect copyright.PENANAcWqFKhmJgb
423Please respect copyright.PENANA9P3mmA06DK
我壓低聲音,或許其中還不由自主地摻進了沉痛。423Please respect copyright.PENANApKAFxh6W3R
423Please respect copyright.PENANA7AX6i6Mz8u
「……世界應該要毀滅了。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAyXnFcmbwCK
423Please respect copyright.PENANAybH9fW9UXm
「哎呀,真的?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAqELIEmK6PM
423Please respect copyright.PENANA5mFSEtSXMP
「多半是,真的。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAdSxyLwyWsK
423Please respect copyright.PENANAu1RbqsBb5T
一般在這時間,她總捧著書瞧,所以這消息她大概真是首次耳聞吧。但就算如此,她的聲音也依舊像是迎接早晨陽光那般輕鬆。同時,她也明白我並不是會為了開這樣無趣玩笑就特地打擾她的人——通常這是屬於她的專利。423Please respect copyright.PENANAhoAZPYyG4n
423Please respect copyright.PENANAZ7wN51SmBb
「這樣啊……」423Please respect copyright.PENANA5YjDYIvNox
423Please respect copyright.PENANAoSciVkyDhH
話筒的另一端,聲音停了下來,而我也沉默。對話出現了空白,而這想必不是由於錯愕或震驚。423Please respect copyright.PENANAZ3YJh5aVXg
423Please respect copyright.PENANAfgyPt0bzS5
按我對她的理解——423Please respect copyright.PENANAk7OzlLa14Q
423Please respect copyright.PENANAdEnw096TmW
「那麼,久違的開個兩人的茶會吧。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAENOcKAMkBB
423Please respect copyright.PENANAUHwQtywA1W
她說。而她那漾起微笑的面容浮現腦海,宛如近在眼前般栩栩如生。423Please respect copyright.PENANAUtkpzskq63
423Please respect copyright.PENANA2MkvBKoZFR
——那恐怕只是啜飲紅茶時,理所當然產生的間隙。
423Please respect copyright.PENANATqMI4Z16Nk
423Please respect copyright.PENANAGdmv0FJ1uO
恰如三月般的柔和陽光在平等的時間內撒在每一處,而連最後的土地享受完那來自一億五千萬公里外的恩澤後,世界將會毀滅。423Please respect copyright.PENANAWDiIuASb6M
423Please respect copyright.PENANA53SbSx4lhD
體認到這事實的我與她,正在她宅邸內的花園裡舉辦僅有兩人的下午茶會。423Please respect copyright.PENANA9SI6laZdJY
423Please respect copyright.PENANAPQC6CeBEy6
花園裡種著萬紫千紅,顏色艷麗的花朵。百合、杜鵑、玫瑰、海棠、紫陽花……總之無論數量或種類,都多得嚇人。儘管經過細心的呵護及嚴格修剪,再加上獨樹一幟的規劃設計,使其華麗不失格調,可她對前一代所留下的這些不太感冒,而唯獨鍾愛一株葉片混雜著紅與黑,宛如染著乾涸的血斑似的彩葉草——至於那個它,現在就在設計古雅的法式餐桌上,點心架的一旁,宛如另一位沉默的與會者那般待著。423Please respect copyright.PENANAEkKCCS1yAo
423Please respect copyright.PENANAzpwUtXJvvj
希望她別以為我是向那株彩葉草告白就好。423Please respect copyright.PENANA7XrX2bigOy
423Please respect copyright.PENANA86QY6Sv2yL
腦袋中浮出連自己都覺得可笑的擔憂。然而我還是想找藉口:對她而言,那畢竟是做為餞別禮,意義相對特別的盆栽。雖然由送禮者的我這樣說會顯得有些自吹自擂,但她在這時還把它放在身邊,也相當程度說明了她對它的重視吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANAxi1DCWFg7l
423Please respect copyright.PENANAoGep5IjfG5
腦中不由得浮現出往事。我與她的相遇,大概只能說是奇蹟。423Please respect copyright.PENANApj7WSFgvT3
423Please respect copyright.PENANAHd00oV7u7s
當然若是鉅細靡遺的解釋,可能直到世界末日都講不完。但若把一切必然連鎖而導致的偶然撇除,單就論契機的話倒挺容易。被拋棄的垂死男孩,因為某貴族千金的心血來潮而得救——423Please respect copyright.PENANAwUvWmoN5XS
423Please respect copyright.PENANA1GznxtBhum
簡單來說,就是這樣有點老套的故事。同時,也不是個在和故事女主角告白後適合訴說的故事。423Please respect copyright.PENANAGGfXpTpFCZ
423Please respect copyright.PENANABs3JUAaIY3
她終於把茶杯放下。「喀拉」一聲,瓷器碰撞發出清脆悅耳的聲響,而她抿了抿唇,有如盛夏通透藍天的眼眸望向我。其中並沒有喜悅或不滿,更準確地說,我完全無法從那無暇的雙眼中讀出任何一點情緒。423Please respect copyright.PENANA2V42Iwpay7
423Please respect copyright.PENANA3cqg8rv7GC
「我曾認為——當然就連現在也一樣,我認為我是個消極的人。」423Please respect copyright.PENANACfU4iVud0S
423Please respect copyright.PENANAzfaUT6uNO9
她的嘴角揚起溫和的笑,接著說。423Please respect copyright.PENANAGj9OZz1ijd
423Please respect copyright.PENANAhVLie8EMdg
「雖然不想把原因全然歸咎於他人,但果然有很大部分是因為家庭因素吧。出生在名門,有著能讓我予取予求的財富,可無論什麼需求都能被滿足,那自然而然就會缺乏慾望。舉例來說就像惰性氣體,一旦滿足了就不會想再進行反應。可人還是複雜得多,只要少了,自然而然就會渴求,那是求生本能。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAMWG0AfFMwZ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAldVlYZ3NYi
從以前開始,她總是這樣。什麼也不講明,說話彎彎繞繞,可又偏偏有著穩定而自信的嗓音,令人不由得沉浸其中,就這樣忍不住聽到最後,於是才理解她所表達的意思。423Please respect copyright.PENANAgbGioGHMau
423Please respect copyright.PENANAkAZ7JWAeQM
「或許我挺中意這樣的狀況。」她說,「再過不了多久,世界就會毀滅,一切將歸於終焉。對我,對我們而言,過去活過的時間,留下的那些證明不復存在,就連這僅剩有限的時間也變得毫無意義,因為人類剩下的未來實在太短,就算完成了什麼,那也會在頃刻之間瓦解消散。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAbiA9gxULm8
423Please respect copyright.PENANAHvBEFSxk8V
說完,她的表情中沒有悵然,沒有失意,倒看起來有些像在緬懷過去。423Please respect copyright.PENANAuppvJTE6Z2
423Please respect copyright.PENANAB9A5UC9tYj
事實上,過去類似的對話不勝枚舉,而我總是站在她的對立面,反駁她的說詞——但那畢竟只屬於個人的想法,所以最終也不曾得出過彼此都認同的結果。423Please respect copyright.PENANAYFdp1qlJU9
423Please respect copyright.PENANA3EG1XvkO1r
她也不是事到如今還想對此多說什麼吧,所以我只是靜待她說出話語的下半部分。423Please respect copyright.PENANAWOUyamDcqt
423Please respect copyright.PENANAADUbie47dN
「不過,如果要說我對現在感到最滿意的理由,那肯定只有一個。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA9EqmfPW6vP
423Please respect copyright.PENANADdmF4dSrJE
那雙澄清的藍眼毫無保留地注視著我,而從其中映出的我,表情想必既陰沉又僵硬。423Please respect copyright.PENANAdpkHMo9aA1
423Please respect copyright.PENANA18u17vKPQr
「——因為只有在這未來與過去都不再重要的現在,你才會容許自己,像這樣出現在我面前。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAPh7OFQcFJX
423Please respect copyright.PENANATzZzstHL9r
從以前開始,你總是那麼頑固。423Please respect copyright.PENANAClc9SDQmd1
423Please respect copyright.PENANAyW1bHH7RNt
少女有如自言自語般悠悠低吟。對此,我完全無法否認。423Please respect copyright.PENANAtK2lc5Qj97
423Please respect copyright.PENANA6sBiDk0OFQ
「親口對我說吧:包含五年前的那起事件,和在那之後的你,以及事到如今才出現在我面前,對我表白的原因。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAcBVYojQcBL
423Please respect copyright.PENANAKBC92QzXs4
——五年前,我離開她,獨自一人逃往遠方。說離開或許不夠精確,對她而言,那是難以諒解的背叛吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANAolr3nfaLqb
423Please respect copyright.PENANArHnAQ0nIkf
「我還以為妳早就知道一切了。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAXI3J040Iwm
423Please respect copyright.PENANAkEYCeped9E
「有些東西是非得由當事人講述才能明白的呀。將回憶化作言語,在那過程中產生的,舉例來說:情緒,也就是呈現出個人主觀意識的那些。我很期待你會說出怎樣的故事。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAErtFirYusP
423Please respect copyright.PENANAHvAjVsFxTP
「那恐怕要讓妳失望了,畢竟不是多有趣的話題……而且還得花上好一段時間。」423Please respect copyright.PENANACe1J8rP2YJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAUHjnZMz9x0
「我不介意,就讓我們奢侈的敘舊吧。對我而言,不存在比和你一同相處更具價值的時間。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAKdeFdW7VKH
423Please respect copyright.PENANA6BqQnaIef8
她的笑容中彎起一絲的甜美,而由那空靈嗓音低吟而出的話語更甚。至此我也無法再婉拒,或者是只要是出自她口中的要求,我多半都無法拒絕。423Please respect copyright.PENANAYMbmMG3fVX
423Please respect copyright.PENANATlfC6NsJyT
真傷腦筋。423Please respect copyright.PENANA2v1za0wBiU
423Please respect copyright.PENANAVkuCSFw6P7
那,從哪開始說才好?423Please respect copyright.PENANA9KdQukcI4F
423Please respect copyright.PENANAh15WxiVGsa
我在腦中構築語序,很輕易就得出了答案。423Please respect copyright.PENANAnMa2uuUil7
423Please respect copyright.PENANAN7mYbHGKBS
果然,得從一切的源頭開始解釋吧。
423Please respect copyright.PENANA7OFNmjskqK
423Please respect copyright.PENANA4MuexGuPtu
我的雙親,是當之無愧的人渣,大概在根本上就出了點甚麼問題,可以說是瘋了吧。對外還能勉強維持正常的表象,實際上裏頭早已腐爛。所以「天下無不是的父母」這句話對我而言只是笑話,非常難笑的那種。應該沒有人會在整條腿的皮膚都被剝下來後還笑得出來才對。423Please respect copyright.PENANA5RbeRDRAfF
423Please respect copyright.PENANA6PoiB1fu4J
貧窮的家裡無法提供——或者說就算有錢,它們也不願給我些正常的食物,最多就是一時興起,丟隻被活活燙死的老鼠死屍讓我吃下肚——那或許是當時從它們那得來最能被稱作食物的東西。423Please respect copyright.PENANAO6hbOCrcFq
423Please respect copyright.PENANA99owDoZDcl
直到現在,混著碎骨與毛皮的肉的腥臭氣味,偶爾還會在腦海中一閃而過。423Please respect copyright.PENANAFGy1o0wofr
423Please respect copyright.PENANArXN10Jy4QG
對於童年,實在有太多太多不願回想的難堪回憶,煩不勝數。我不想再花時間敘述,就講結果吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANArkfw6GbAcg
423Please respect copyright.PENANASf4o5C5mqj
在某天可能是終於玩膩,或者是其他理由,總之,它們盡興的對我施暴後,用個袋子把奄奄一息的我裝起來,隨便找個地方把我給扔了——畢竟在那裏,路邊的屍體並不是那麼少見的存在。423Please respect copyright.PENANAKc6fUJzYE5
423Please respect copyright.PENANA3X9Gn2YD9c
神智不清的我倒在小巷,一旁街道上的喧囂含糊地和自己越發薄弱的呼吸聲混在一起,大腦似乎再也懶得去理會理所當然的疼痛,身體只能感到無比的沉重。死神或許正站在一旁了吧,但不巧那時的我,連睜眼的能力都沒有,所以無緣見他一面。423Please respect copyright.PENANAdaQCeK0nWr
423Please respect copyright.PENANAWsvM6RtVO2
對於死亡,那時的我就見得不少。被孩童玩弄至死的雛鳥,被車撞死的狗,街弄裡長滿蛆蟲的棄屍——見到的人們厭惡,撇開視線,並露出看見穢物般的表情,抱怨那狗娘養的鬼東西觸了霉頭。423Please respect copyright.PENANAh2TuT5pXnv
423Please respect copyright.PENANACWob58ZEQS
過去我也是如此。但當自己真的觸及死亡時,感覺就不同了。423Please respect copyright.PENANAg4mY7qEgmO
423Please respect copyright.PENANA6WWmk7AzJS
四肢發麻,很冷,但身體卻無力顫抖。嘴裡發酸,五感像是融化那樣,唯一能明白的只有心臟的跳動越來越吃力。423Please respect copyright.PENANAETCrN7ra14
423Please respect copyright.PENANATWAieh6zvX
我感受不到淚水,但那時的我想必淚流滿面,因為這才確切明白,絕沒有比死更不可理喻的事物存在——但為什麼我得受這些苦?我還想活下去。就算還得繼續受凌虐,就算死可能更輕鬆,但唯獨我還不想從這世界上消逝,我不想變得跟過去自己見到的那些一樣,所以我懷抱恐懼和絕望活到了現在。為何就連這點卑微的要求都變成是奢望?我不想死,真的。我不想死。423Please respect copyright.PENANAqrOvUcZ4nx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAvsokH505l5
——況且,那兩個人還能活著。423Please respect copyright.PENANA0HzZ0Cmven
423Please respect copyright.PENANAuMHl8UHbCP
憑甚麼。423Please respect copyright.PENANA6OW6bb789t
423Please respect copyright.PENANARo6uhX3RAE
憑甚麼?423Please respect copyright.PENANAIIJJciGRk6
423Please respect copyright.PENANAIcGpWaHBRw
那強迫我降臨在這悲慘世界的存在、奪去我性命的兇手,卻還能享受自己的快樂活著。只有這點我無法忍受。423Please respect copyright.PENANA5osBKZlufQ
423Please respect copyright.PENANA74SHSdqJ8o
對它們我只有滿腹的恨意,我恨它們的笑,我恨它們的飽足,我恨它們還能自在的呼吸。只有它們的絕望才能撫慰我。只有見到它們毀滅後,我才能安息。423Please respect copyright.PENANA2GnisxSPWl
423Please respect copyright.PENANAm7s1n4bGsd
所以我不願死在這。423Please respect copyright.PENANA8a4PRiuNkD
423Please respect copyright.PENANAE42e5v5DKw
我想活下去。我想報仇,我想折磨它們,我想賜給它們痛苦,我想為那兩個喪心病狂的瘋子送上相襯的末路,我想讓它們嘗到我所經歷過百倍以上的苦難,我想要它們和現在的我一樣沉溺在對死亡的恐懼中化作無意義的肉塊——423Please respect copyright.PENANAX5Qr4nSWXH
423Please respect copyright.PENANAw9mpqSu4HX
——就是這樣的眼神啊。423Please respect copyright.PENANAvej5BNQR8N
423Please respect copyright.PENANATLuNVkz6wI
少女緬懷般的聲音響起。我不由得愣住,而她坦率地直視我的眼。423Please respect copyright.PENANANcWbb74zow
423Please respect copyright.PENANADx1v9UUuXZ
陽光再次閃耀。遠處的花香,枝頭上的鳥鳴,以及她那輕輕摩娑我臉龐,光滑而略顯冰涼的手。這一切都讓內心陰暗骯髒的情緒漸漸消散。423Please respect copyright.PENANAevT55upQmc
423Please respect copyright.PENANAKHRtVAUcLw
「那時我從你眼中見到,內心悸動不已的,就是你現在露出的眼神。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAQ4P30wUHfW
423Please respect copyright.PENANAFHXtFPUE9E
「……妳這怪僻真該改改。」423Please respect copyright.PENANARarRfmE6Oo
423Please respect copyright.PENANAd9OYwkOSBn
我猶豫了一下,垂下了視線,移開了她的手。那不屬於自身的溫度消失,不得不說有點失落,但這才有辦法正常進行對話。423Please respect copyright.PENANAQeCS4lWtC5
423Please respect copyright.PENANA4kQfRZLBir
「我喜歡光彩奪目的東西。就像在夏日沙灘上熠熠生輝的玻璃珠,或是在靜謐月光下散發皎潔螢光的水晶——抽象的說,人們為了目標或理想努力,或者是對生的渴望,對我而言,那美的幾乎讓人窒息。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAZy4u9fbcZ4
423Please respect copyright.PENANA0XxoqDCgOo
「怪人。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAEBM6k4XxDY
423Please respect copyright.PENANA5PL0Lteim7
「別那樣說自己心儀的對象嘛。而且也得慶幸那時你碰上的是我這樣的怪人,你才有辦法活下來不是嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANA6UvaAB6mPi
423Please respect copyright.PENANAAtj4456PBY
我啞口無言,畢竟那是無可否認的事實。她遇上了我,並施以援手,最後甚至還得以存活。再說一次,這果然只能用奇蹟來形容吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANA7BUOOyEeGD
423Please respect copyright.PENANAN4evZKRtPN
「不過,這下就搞懂你為甚麼會做出那樣驚人的事情了呢。當初搜查事件的警官,可都被規定得自備嘔吐袋才可以進入現場。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAXMmTtLJgVJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAgt89AbI9dg
「……是嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAx17iJA4HQc
423Please respect copyright.PENANA9tnwyg9l3Y
她聳聳肩。423Please respect copyright.PENANAkwen7tQa1U
423Please respect copyright.PENANAx0hMKLRw7P
「玩笑而已啦。當時我還沉浸在某人不告而別的悲傷中,壓根沒想過那起事件與你有關哪。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA6gBRPCsrby
423Please respect copyright.PENANAOYYXP9kxds
她笑著,但其中卻能看出顯而易見的不悅。423Please respect copyright.PENANAlOCtfkQT1M
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYVjj4Tkg4C
「抱歉。」423Please respect copyright.PENANANWtRS5LCDz
423Please respect copyright.PENANAxpHFgvTQr0
「嗯?你是為了什麼道歉?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAxYYgwKT0Vb
423Please respect copyright.PENANAsLi5vfOGUU
「大概,全部。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAS76ePDUUVX
423Please respect copyright.PENANAdeYMGN4HtN
「這樣也太狡猾了,以前你偷吃我的點心還裝作沒事的事情我還沒找你算帳耶!」423Please respect copyright.PENANAKszmMLRnlB
423Please respect copyright.PENANAXwV6tCdnQU
「……還要再加上我完全忘記有這回事,抱歉。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAgRv2fORdvc
423Please respect copyright.PENANATdRTc3CUPq
「……原諒你。畢竟那只是我胡謅的。不如說偷吃點心的是我才對。但那不是重點,不許岔開話題。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAlu0f4Xlt54
423Please respect copyright.PENANAqAsN8kPRSF
「……抱歉。」423Please respect copyright.PENANASXZvxYwvlS
423Please respect copyright.PENANAj3KFcMiGqD
「告訴我,為甚麼離開了?你應該明白,以我的身分,替你處理掉可能有的麻煩,並不是件難事吧?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAKz8pyAYNqz
423Please respect copyright.PENANAss9YWaxPt1
「當然,我明白。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAQjbJxFIcDI
423Please respect copyright.PENANAbeSVGEBQvn
這裡的法律對於權貴相當「通情達理」。加上事件出在貧民窟,要不是屍體的狀況太過慘烈,甚至都不會被當成案件處理吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANAXOG1OR0Fq5
423Please respect copyright.PENANAOpwW1LwjDm
所以,我想逃離的並不是刑罰,而是自己。
423Please respect copyright.PENANADVZe0MFbm8
423Please respect copyright.PENANAK2j5bGtMl4
那天夜晚,我潛入它們的住所,制伏後打暈。423Please respect copyright.PENANAHGV6CcS0Rc
423Please respect copyright.PENANAHyICvd2ub5
塞住嘴,綁在椅子上,接著用針撬開它們的指甲。423Please respect copyright.PENANAdewkK9dfjB
423Please respect copyright.PENANAy7cRhgiwu8
它們一下子就痛醒了過來,但嘴被堵住,只能嗚嗚的叫著,我沒理會,只是依序,左手,右手,左腳,右腳,把一片片那塞滿污垢的指甲剝下來。423Please respect copyright.PENANAiYK5CzIoMx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYGbHueOLrv
再來是頭髮。用的是沸水。423Please respect copyright.PENANACYW6pngrZs
423Please respect copyright.PENANA9GVWm04Ibm
再來是牙。用的是鉗子。423Please respect copyright.PENANASayL4vSWDu
423Please respect copyright.PENANAQ8FYWikeAq
再來……423Please respect copyright.PENANAbgWoihwMpK
423Please respect copyright.PENANAkoXEBilvjx
對它們的凌遲持續到日出。女人在兩個小時前就被男人殺死了,而男人活著,但也僅是還沒嚥下最後一口氣而已。腐朽的木製地板,斑駁的牆,早已涼掉寒酸的湯,這個室內所見一切,幾乎都被血與肉末塗上鮮紅的漆。我也不例外吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANAcyIXPtpPCk
423Please respect copyright.PENANAqEwEYbq1q8
靜靜的我望著倒臥在地的屍首。男人連著眼皮的眼珠落在地上沾染灰塵,被刨去血肉的半張臉,被火灼燒而焦黑的手,碎裂腿骨裸露出的粉色骨髓——終於,我忍不住反胃,吐了出來。423Please respect copyright.PENANAD8nLQdFOmx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAMBsGyLHZIt
「確實,我恨它們,更恨不得它們死。從我活下來的那天起,復仇就成為我繼續活著的唯一目的。而我也有覺悟,要親手將那兩人推入絕望的深淵。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAXpUN8UnqEb
423Please respect copyright.PENANASAUMWePbJi
「可實際下手後,它們的痛苦卻不如想像中的甘美,他們的哭喊聽了也只想把耳朵緊緊摀起——但就算察覺了,理性卻無法順利地讓身體停下。它反倒像樂在其中似的,用盡一切方法去折磨無力反抗的那兩人。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAMBfE0gLNzT
423Please respect copyright.PENANAkUueicngaE
最終,復仇帶來的只有空虛與罪孽。而犯下這番暴行的我,又與它們有何不同?423Please respect copyright.PENANASZ460zatKq
423Please respect copyright.PENANAq1syU7fWUW
「所以我逃跑了。已經無異於禽獸的我,怎麼有資格待在妳身邊,又怎麼有資格像甚麼也沒發生過那般享受幸福?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAiyEGIo15Tk
423Please respect copyright.PENANAvDr2pIUWBb
或許當時我該讓法律制裁更好。但若是如此,我十之八九會被貴族出身,不願浪費寶貴時間在貧民窟案件的法官大人,草率的宣判死刑吧。這麼說,我的離開在某種程度上確實是因為刑罰沒錯。423Please respect copyright.PENANA42E9yR6HLZ
423Please respect copyright.PENANA8PdpFf9IIf
我希望受到公正的處罰,但這國家的法律無法做到這點。我想贖罪,但卻毫無頭緒。不知如何是好的我,最終懦弱的拋下少女獨自一人,孤身逃向遠方的城市,並在陰影中躲藏著生存。423Please respect copyright.PENANAjInM3eMdVA
423Please respect copyright.PENANAguY36WCqE7
這想必無法稱作懲罰,可那時我只覺得無路可走,只好選擇了這樣宛如自我滿足般的做法。423Please respect copyright.PENANAcQuGQJwUXm
423Please respect copyright.PENANAmOVP3JLCiE
「總之,這就是全部了。無趣而令人生厭吧。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA5VoOChtBsx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAhHuAf5ncm1
我往後靠向椅背,長長地嘆出一口氣。而少女依舊是不知在想些甚麼的表情看著我,開口。423Please respect copyright.PENANANQYwgXyMxU
423Please respect copyright.PENANAT7PSaPEBjs
「……我居然是因為這樣的理由才被甩了呀。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAd1DS8fD3gG
423Please respect copyright.PENANADD1VRgvsWN
「……抱歉。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAuiaxRlXawE
423Please respect copyright.PENANAnbm1LqmkZw
也是,肯定難以接受吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANAtwTz9LOnez
423Please respect copyright.PENANAlYhnQJIgGI
若是這份情感在五年前向她傳達,那一切,包含至今為止的人生,肯定會大大的不同。423Please respect copyright.PENANAvcJ9wCvXyX
423Please respect copyright.PENANA9f0RqxxOlP
假如重來,五年前的自己,是否會放下仇恨,而選擇追求眼前的幸福?423Please respect copyright.PENANAkpZrU47W2W
423Please respect copyright.PENANALd0xjroX6R
說實話,我不確定。畢竟復仇絕非光鮮亮麗的夢想或目標,在那前方有的只是地獄。423Please respect copyright.PENANAZWnb9MJEau
423Please respect copyright.PENANAZRYYVgzeks
但若說放棄,那滿腔的恨意又該何去何從?原諒它們?靜待時間消化?不,絕無可能。果然最後我也只能吐出這樣表面的道歉。423Please respect copyright.PENANAYRCYAQD7vC
423Please respect copyright.PENANAB7O8ZRPWrG
而她搖頭,笑容少見的有些苦澀。423Please respect copyright.PENANAnS2jiOVqGF
423Please respect copyright.PENANAFE1km4KHS9
「我明白的。本來我的期待,在收到這株彩葉草時就該破滅了。那再明顯不過的意涵,怎麼可能沒有察覺?可奇怪的是,我卻遲遲無法死心,明明就只是那樣消極的人呀。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAMfLBbhC1UR
423Please respect copyright.PENANAqb60yx8lMj
她拿起茶杯,沒有啜飲,而是望著杯底殘留,早涼了的紅茶。423Please respect copyright.PENANAdJfGgMV3CX
423Please respect copyright.PENANAafo0bCal7g
「那是我的生日——更是我父母去世的那時候。為甚麼非得選在那時拋下我離開?該不會你出乎意料地恨我吧?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAmmzNZCFNQw
423Please respect copyright.PENANAAElz1xhYpK
「……沒有這回事。」不如說,截然相反。「我喜歡妳,和妳相處的時光真的很快樂,甚至足以動搖我復仇的念頭。但正因為如此,我必須在對妳的喜歡還沒壓過仇恨的時候下手……」423Please respect copyright.PENANAdIoO7Z3P7N
423Please respect copyright.PENANATLO9GMzuzM
「我不會問,那為何還要堅持復仇。因為那沒有意義。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAczZa1TVgHE
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYgnss9Wp21
她「碰」地放下茶杯,打斷我的解釋。深紅的液體從杯內撒出,濺在少女的衣襬上,而她的語調既快又急。423Please respect copyright.PENANAM9dgjRwwaD
423Please respect copyright.PENANA2qPU9NTAaT
「但既然如此,過去對這些隻字未提的你,事到如今又為何還來向我坦白?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAIqgK6EeAMK
423Please respect copyright.PENANAU1ajdAkB5r
少女清澈的雙眼,此刻散發過去從未見過強烈而不容我逃避的意念。在那眼神的注視下,我差點承受不住別過眼去。但原本正午熾熱耀眼的陽光,隨時間經過一秒比一秒衰弱。已經不再有我軟弱猶豫的餘地。423Please respect copyright.PENANAXshIxaLgI3
423Please respect copyright.PENANAb5VakSZlsN
更何況,我正是為此而來。423Please respect copyright.PENANAPCGcT5tEKx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAS68pnnfBBz
對象就在面前,覺悟也已足夠,也沒有臨陣脫逃的藉口。423Please respect copyright.PENANAONSWXswPgL
423Please respect copyright.PENANAUlyFdauYuI
我深吸一口氣,終於下定決心開口。423Please respect copyright.PENANAWTFUzieAwz
423Please respect copyright.PENANArwPxRLwJKz
「我一直都在思考。就連和妳通完電話前往這裡的路上,和妳見面的前一刻,我都在想,是否該打消向妳告白的念頭。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAhkWMX7XcyC
423Please respect copyright.PENANAFCGHnBX0N3
「是啊,畢竟在世界毀滅的前一天才表白心意,無論被接受還是拒絕,又能改變什麼呢。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAV7lCnbuirX
423Please respect copyright.PENANA4ad4x25SNB
「或許妳說得沒錯。但我是個卑鄙自私的人啊,想法既頑固又利己,甚至為了可笑的自我滿足,連喜歡的女孩子都傷害了,老實說就是個十足的人渣。但就算是我這樣的討厭鬼,果然在世界末日之前,還是會想做點甚麼,讓自己沒那麼混帳啊。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAOtww4iCbS7
423Please respect copyright.PENANAv5hGTg9U76
這是我發自內心的實話,但少女聽著微微皺起了眉頭,表情是顯而易見的不滿意。423Please respect copyright.PENANAC5SMU41TjK
423Please respect copyright.PENANADTtZ1vmgmp
「……別開玩笑了。你至今為止堅持的,只是那麼不堪一擊的事物嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAFZpWSGPWTV
423Please respect copyright.PENANA11OARJW2Te
「不是。但在死亡面前,我終於認清,對我而言還有遠比那要更重要的事物。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAVOSMUryTrs
423Please respect copyright.PENANAAJRbxEMT7r
「我不明白你的意思。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAgbxevzxenJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAuSEO0D2AH3
她直直地盯著我,我張嘴,而本該出口的話語卻不由自主地停下。423Please respect copyright.PENANA5TSJLHpBJw
423Please respect copyright.PENANAZfWW23dSQw
要解釋的話,可得把自己那些幼稚的想法全攤在她面前。說實話,只有難以啟齒能形容。423Please respect copyright.PENANAQEP96qtNtk
423Please respect copyright.PENANAue8lIKMQmr
她會看不起我吧,唾棄那些任意妄為的念頭,甚至對我失望透頂也有可能。423Please respect copyright.PENANAHfVUAnWIJw
423Please respect copyright.PENANA1FEcbWuyRl
「我沒辦法放棄對妳的喜歡啊。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAnVd0dSw1m2
423Please respect copyright.PENANA0iOPfViLOO
不過,我還是說了。更忍不住低下頭,隱瞞羞恥而泛起的潮紅。但我沒有停下,而是一股腦地繼續傾訴言語。423Please respect copyright.PENANAtdNtgWWTcF
423Please respect copyright.PENANAmQqqojlam1
「我喜歡妳。從過去到現在一直。我本以為會好好地把那秘密帶進墳墓,不過我似乎沒有堅強到在見到妳以後,還能忍受這份情感無人知曉,就這樣化為塵土的痛苦。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAtB0rm354SL
423Please respect copyright.PENANATc2QTbhHYU
「但我可不記得自己喜歡上的是這樣沒有原則的笨蛋。」423Please respect copyright.PENANArcoPXYlCLZ
423Please respect copyright.PENANANWZqz5fKc5
雙手沾滿鮮血,斷送了無可計數的人的命及希望。這樣罪無可赦的我還妄圖追求幸福,實在是恬不知恥吧,果然自己還是十足的混帳,完全沒有反省。423Please respect copyright.PENANAh5r532jFId
423Please respect copyright.PENANA3li1X6oB5n
「我也以為我要更死板點,看樣子自己是比想像中更不要臉。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA8SVocCk8gY
423Please respect copyright.PENANA3iFPt8XfS0
「那麼,你的自責,你過去認為需要償還的罪呢?」423Please respect copyright.PENANA0DstIhMknx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAOMPxuMc1h5
「就先賒下來,等死後交給神來審判,下了地獄後再還吧。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA5ySMTORNsE
423Please respect copyright.PENANAVknzPFfFra
「……你甚麼時候開始對莫名其妙的宗教感興趣了?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAz4qJ3Rn4z1
423Please respect copyright.PENANAOSLtqKYymo
「剛才。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAETqDp8t9J8
423Please respect copyright.PENANAhaqQFdEBDk
不過是教義亂七八糟,只為了貪圖方便而利己的信仰。這樣看來,不如稱其為褻瀆要更貼切點。423Please respect copyright.PENANAItRnhtPUIb
423Please respect copyright.PENANAX9PhONHtYr
「真蠢。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA5Fiygn8ci0
423Please respect copyright.PENANAecnwmcVquP
「抱歉。」我深吸一口氣,「但我果然還是喜歡妳。」423Please respect copyright.PENANABCBFIMWoxV
423Please respect copyright.PENANAntEaIOn1S2
腦袋雜七雜八的念頭混在一起,說出口的句子也凌亂破碎,邏輯更是破綻百出,胡言亂語也該有個限度。但她沒有恥笑,或者對我冷嘲熱諷,而依舊擺著那副毫無波動,難以理解的表情,沉默地看著我。423Please respect copyright.PENANAnuZxAoEVfy
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYgvXlPhnMT
就這樣對視了十來秒。她像是認輸般的撇過頭去嘆氣,就像沉思似地看向飄著雲的藍天。423Please respect copyright.PENANAV8RPFlBNcV
423Please respect copyright.PENANAg4lajAIgCw
然後,她接著回答。423Please respect copyright.PENANAZkRpA6wvtO
423Please respect copyright.PENANAIafoccSzyj
「我也是呀。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAjgtFQ5n3Zn
423Please respect copyright.PENANAH57eUE3vQE
就只是那短短四個字,讓我感到心臟猛烈確實的跳動。423Please respect copyright.PENANAiSOlzWkg5Z
423Please respect copyright.PENANAklP7smRfsP
滾燙的血液運送氧氣及幸福感,使四肢充滿活力,我費了好大的工夫才忍住歡呼的衝動——但她的反應卻與我截然相反。423Please respect copyright.PENANAVToTEuHLxI
423Please respect copyright.PENANAeKIO3oPCn6
少女只是靠向椅背,右手托腮,冷冷地遙望天空,沒有再開口。423Please respect copyright.PENANAw2O0fDm0BY
423Please respect copyright.PENANAc8YLWX2E4c
許久。至少對於僅存的時間而言,足夠久的時間裡,我抬起頭來,安靜望著她,而她望著天。那側臉上的表情有些虛幻。423Please respect copyright.PENANAlvDupH2dE7
423Please respect copyright.PENANA7FgdQCWZOU
……那樣就好了吧。423Please respect copyright.PENANAoVK8XL1TwU
423Please respect copyright.PENANAAX6RuQNWZ6
我這麼想,不再拿出懷錶。因為無論結果如何,我也已經了結了自己最後的心願——423Please respect copyright.PENANAz8TbLWKnxM
423Please respect copyright.PENANAjYqxifj3oD
但是——宛若低喃,輕如微風的話語從她口中訴出。但是,彷彿接續我未完成的句子。423Please respect copyright.PENANAgGds95Dq96
423Please respect copyright.PENANAi5xYFLeSpc
我沒有漏看一絲她表情的變化。也因為如此,我目睹了那與世界末日足夠相襯的那個瞬間。423Please respect copyright.PENANA0I89tAVfwh
423Please respect copyright.PENANAeWgxR0nJXM
「啊啊,這果然只能帶來痛苦,不是嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAxlYg8PhQ2g
423Please respect copyright.PENANARi6J2Q7X86
——她的聲音明顯地顫抖著。423Please respect copyright.PENANAF7lMN3S2KL
423Please respect copyright.PENANAmsbyijtKei
彷彿真的覺得困擾般,她細長的眉皺起,緊緊抿住的嘴角不再上揚,取而代之一雙眼泛起淚光的她,轉過頭來面對我說。423Please respect copyright.PENANAiGZMCdFtHT
423Please respect copyright.PENANALAsjGNL6xs
「為甚麼不把那感情藏到最後一刻?吶,就當作是騙我吧。說你喜歡我只是個玩笑,只是在世界完結前心血來潮的惡作劇——為甚麼要讓我朝思暮想的美夢成真?為甚麼到最後才害我喜歡上那所剩無幾的生命?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAc1jsHynCNL
423Please respect copyright.PENANAu73Hs6yYZg
她緊緊揪住胸口,我一句話也說不出來。只是想著——果然我罪該萬死。423Please respect copyright.PENANARRnJhehoLr
423Please respect copyright.PENANAY1x2BGYTOT
晶瑩的淚珠劃過少女白淨的臉龐,午後柔和的日光灑在她金燦的髮絲上,而同樣溼了眼眶的我的眼中映出的她,宛如散發著光輝,顯得耀眼,顯得聖潔。423Please respect copyright.PENANA7mVZnulVPq
423Please respect copyright.PENANA13g4QUEdOM
但是,這肯定不是那麼美好的東西。畢竟其中包含的是對死的恐懼、對即將逝去的生的不捨,與對剛開始就得完結的戀情的悲嘆。423Please respect copyright.PENANABqi8gEncEP
423Please respect copyright.PENANAwXFb8qqmkB
無論她表現得多麼雲淡風輕,終究還是個正值青春年華的少女。面臨突如其來的死,面臨一切瓦解殆盡的末日,怎麼可能不受影響。423Please respect copyright.PENANAvYdOf9n3FS
423Please respect copyright.PENANAMWqoUwGTjH
「本來還能欺騙自己的。在世界結束的前一刻還能再見到你,光是這樣就已經足夠,就能帶著真的只是那麼一點的遺憾結束。真的已經做好這樣的心理準備。但被一直喜歡著的人告白後,怎麼還可能做到!」423Please respect copyright.PENANA2daI5YRiKQ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAAiWvIL1Wdm
她不停地落著淚,而過分甜美的哭腔令人動容。423Please respect copyright.PENANAYRycezM3Bt
423Please respect copyright.PENANAGTE21itbUR
方才的喜悅已不見蹤影,我看著那樣的她,心如刀割,可大腦卻只想得出廉價的安慰。光憑那些蒼白無力的話語,又怎能止住她的淚水?423Please respect copyright.PENANAAC0AKOy2HB
423Please respect copyright.PENANAjNYlFawf6G
如果可以,我多想現在將她擁入懷中,替她拭去淚水,成為她的助力。但她流淚的起因是我一廂情願的話語,若再做出那樣像是置身事外的舉動,連我自己都無法原諒。423Please respect copyright.PENANA3JoQipOJKJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAMABKRWBx0R
難道我又錯了嗎?423Please respect copyright.PENANAlTfulPaEOe
423Please respect copyright.PENANA73n32hyyhK
這樣的念頭在腦中一閃而過。423Please respect copyright.PENANAVX2wc1axSn
423Please respect copyright.PENANAZrK4QzN7rC
——當初如果放棄復仇就好了。423Please respect copyright.PENANAyjyV7XSg9L
423Please respect copyright.PENANABmvtAppAxY
當初再更厚臉皮一點就好了。或者,自己只需要好好放下這份情感,今天別來和她見面就好了。這樣一切都不會改變。甚麼也不會產生,也就甚麼都不會消失,少女更不會在這最後一幕,流下悲傷的眼淚。一切會如日出日落那般理所當然地迎來終結——正如過去我們所預想的那樣。423Please respect copyright.PENANAChkNio3req
423Please respect copyright.PENANAvUfUIFaclq
但是。我搖搖頭,將那些毫無幫助的想法從腦中驅逐。423Please respect copyright.PENANAiFoNIQjUOf
423Please respect copyright.PENANAXQmf5EuL0d
是啊。或許過去自己真的錯了。但追求幸福不該是錯誤。無論何時,傳達心意也並不是件會讓人痛苦的事。我是這麼認為的,而我也希望少女那麼想。423Please respect copyright.PENANA5mcQBOMWf6
423Please respect copyright.PENANAqRt3LrUpIT
所以自己果然既自我中心又卑劣。但就算這樣的我,她也對我說了喜歡,那這樣就好。423Please respect copyright.PENANAywToH3s8j1
423Please respect copyright.PENANAA91MoMEJoI
接下來該做的就是拚盡一切,為了讓少女能再次展露笑顏。423Please respect copyright.PENANAlHbcn9XMV6
423Please respect copyright.PENANAh7b5V9JvUh
「確實啊。才剛實現的戀情瞬間就要破滅,而且還是因為世界末日這種難以接受的原因,當然很痛苦。但就算如此,我果然還是認為,能在最後向妳傳達心意,真的是太好了。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAHhqD8w9mWL
423Please respect copyright.PENANAQVYG3Fg9I0
愚鈍又無知的我,無法堆砌華麗的文藻,也講不出能打動人心的名言佳句。自己更不是正向熱血的主角,沒有必須打倒的邪惡魔王,也阻止不了即將到來的末日。我唯一能做的,只有將心中認為正確的事物,盡其所能準確地轉化為言語傳達給她。423Please respect copyright.PENANA0udaSB99od
423Please respect copyright.PENANAi3XMCEWlQb
「一點都不好!能聽見你親口說喜歡我很開心,可那不夠啊。想一直和你在一起,想牽著手出門,還有更多,更多……但那些再也做不到了!既然這樣,還不如甚麼也不要開始更好不是嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAgGYQiMw5E5
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYgFlAlFESv
淚水濕濡化著淡妝的臉,而姣好的臉龐上表情扭曲。她就像淹溺於絕望中那般向我呼喊著。423Please respect copyright.PENANAPFxi0HbgZB
423Please respect copyright.PENANAcmwJRUlEZa
——不是這樣的。我否認。423Please respect copyright.PENANAyn0z9XfS7E
423Please respect copyright.PENANALsknGDeb28
「比起一無所有。就算必須承擔失去的痛苦,就算只是稍縱即逝,我還是認為感受過幸福的人生更加美好——人終究是活在當下。就算餘下的未來只剩不到半天,那怕感受到的喜悅只是剎那,但在心中誕生的感觸,閃亮耀眼的某些東西,都該有所價值才對。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAPFABHnvih8
423Please respect copyright.PENANADtBpbtFoCT
「……那只是你的想法吧。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAjIJXvYRGRu
423Please respect copyright.PENANADPENDjWc5b
「妳說得沒錯,那只是我的想法。價值觀並不是能強加給誰,或者由他人定奪、評判對錯的東西。就像過去我們所談論過的那樣。」我起身走到她的身旁,蹲下。423Please respect copyright.PENANAhtXydm2PDa
423Please respect copyright.PENANAlao1plOTTe
「所以我沒辦法說妳錯。但——」423Please respect copyright.PENANADWqjEetBUk
423Please respect copyright.PENANAv58L3PFYsu
千萬人有千萬種幸福的定義,追求的方式也不盡相同。但畏懼失去而駐足不前,那樣並不算是幸福。423Please respect copyright.PENANAh6bncVpgn0
423Please respect copyright.PENANAv7m4zmuibB
「——比起哭泣,果然能讓人笑著的那方更棒,不是嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAkgxlh1QVet
423Please respect copyright.PENANAq5mPqUybK2
我輕輕替她抹去淚水,一面扯出了不熟悉而僵硬,甚至還有點扭曲,但總之確實存在的微笑。423Please respect copyright.PENANAwTe9cm2yYg
423Please respect copyright.PENANAjEQYqlslW3
儘管是像我這樣又遜又不入流的傢伙,還是希望能讓喜歡的女孩子不再流淚,並能露出幸福的笑容。423Please respect copyright.PENANAl3PavSsB7F
423Please respect copyright.PENANAq9DrvYDmLX
「這也……太犯規了!」423Please respect copyright.PENANAkexAGcVWjx
423Please respect copyright.PENANAulBAUT6XdS
她淚如泉湧地喊著。並像要毆打我那般撞進我的懷中。423Please respect copyright.PENANAG68BdjDbZd
423Please respect copyright.PENANAmWrNcFww3l
結果而言,她沒有停下哭泣,反倒更進一步,宛如孩童似地嚎啕大哭。她泣不成聲地說著抱怨與罵人的話,對象有大半是對我,而剩下的因為聲音哽咽與嘶啞而無法辨別。我摟住她,感受懷裡的溫度,以及肩頭上落下更加炙熱的淚水,然後拍著她的背,就這樣直到夕陽沉沒,夜幕降臨。423Please respect copyright.PENANAVfIRl7QZd7
423Please respect copyright.PENANANYrzPMhFYG
在那之後我們換了位子,是兩人位的長椅,我們倆並肩相依而坐。藍紫色的夜空依稀可見點點星光,而皎潔皓白的月高掛在上頭。周遭響著蟲鳴,以及青蛙清脆的歌聲,營造出鄉村似悠閒的氛圍。423Please respect copyright.PENANAVod11g4ibO
423Please respect copyright.PENANAE1MY5YeAkv
一旁立燈散發昏黃且溫暖的橙光,照亮這畝地。許多被吸引的小蟲正繞著那飛舞。423Please respect copyright.PENANAeAAGLEPwZ4
423Please respect copyright.PENANA4GuZ6ZGbGE
印象中她對蟲沒有好感,無論色彩豔麗的蝴蝶或是蛾。不過,現在也不是在意那個的時候。423Please respect copyright.PENANAnUTpuzJxVW
423Please respect copyright.PENANAoeM8qcMS8k
「好久沒那樣哭過了……大概有記憶以來這還是第一次。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAxuqOGn16Vd
423Please respect copyright.PENANAgU6cX7ijKL
她的頭靠在我的肩膀上,聲音還有些低啞。423Please respect copyright.PENANAD818F4ba9n
423Please respect copyright.PENANAYa7AV4qBL2
「大概也是最後一次了。」423Please respect copyright.PENANABSQhYdqrDC
423Please respect copyright.PENANAwr4wIgrlZk
「住口。你是想害我繼續哭嗎?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAfnaIVthIl2
423Please respect copyright.PENANAombjxqvuYr
我搖搖頭。423Please respect copyright.PENANAWHOxidySm3
423Please respect copyright.PENANAr7fWIg9QMF
「我的意思是,從現在開始,我會盡可能地努力,為了讓妳不再哭泣。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAVaFbnZHldJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANACpmXFUYHqZ
「呼,哈哈。所以這些台詞都是從哪本愛情小說上看來的啊?」423Please respect copyright.PENANAiYVb2Zd31L
423Please respect copyright.PENANAayNB1AQ3SM
她笑出聲來,伸出白皙而纖細的手指,戳了戳我的臉。423Please respect copyright.PENANAWQJ8N8ywol
423Please respect copyright.PENANAihI2gL6BTn
「少囉嗦。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAlrqZOdIgfm
423Please respect copyright.PENANAUBxWDJ9fgy
……果然那種裝模作樣的話不適合我啊。423Please respect copyright.PENANA7FgmSM5ZwI
423Please respect copyright.PENANAHuQOPev1Oo
銀鈴般的笑聲響起,和諧地融入夜色。直到總算滿足後,她稍微縮起身子,握住了我的手。423Please respect copyright.PENANARkzHaWogp0
423Please respect copyright.PENANATtCgN9rel8
她的手細嫩又柔軟,和長滿厚繭的我的手截然相反,而我毫不在意地輕輕回握。423Please respect copyright.PENANAhoHGMslxnU
423Please respect copyright.PENANAUCwFtOmQrs
「嗯,感情真是奇妙的東西。」她閉起眼,嘴角牽起一抹輕笑。423Please respect copyright.PENANAKxWQ3xW3Nd
423Please respect copyright.PENANAdvWqZRwtOO
「像這樣碰觸著你就能感到幸福,但滿足的同時,內心卻又呼喊著要索求更多……」423Please respect copyright.PENANAHSUwlw7eW7
423Please respect copyright.PENANAO9hGFifGi6
她的細語宛如夢囈,身體更加靠了上來。胸膛能感受到她心臟的跳動,而鼻頭能感受到她吐息的吹拂。423Please respect copyright.PENANAI94IF8REMV
423Please respect copyright.PENANAHNIE32IcEm
她跨坐在我身上,距離近的讓我眼中只容得下她。蔚藍的雙眼殘留哭過的痕跡,但其中卻散發耀眼的光彩;而那頭柔順的金髮在月光照拂下閃著銀色的光輝,此刻的她就宛如湖中的妖精那樣魅人。423Please respect copyright.PENANA66oD2EmD0S
423Please respect copyright.PENANASISKgTA2Xe
「所以,更加地滿足我吧。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAfpbmRMmf6M
423Please respect copyright.PENANA8JvZEja584
「……悉聽尊便。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAQ7iu7NCUyi
423Please respect copyright.PENANA3hnodBQV4a
「然後,別再離開我。」423Please respect copyright.PENANA6hGRW86MtO
423Please respect copyright.PENANAw844vmX7vF
「我哪裡都不會去。」423Please respect copyright.PENANArmODOx6Agw
423Please respect copyright.PENANAS0OmZxD5wd
「謝謝。我愛你啊。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAw7DpYe7STd
423Please respect copyright.PENANAwlslyEw8UU
「我也愛妳。」423Please respect copyright.PENANAV8OxiwemhJ
423Please respect copyright.PENANAmy0o8qJG9M
聽完,她笑了。希望那不是台詞太過肉麻的緣故。423Please respect copyright.PENANAC5COClGlFo
423Please respect copyright.PENANAx2HGsVlydB
嘴失去了說話的作用,因此刻有比言語更能準確傳達心意的方法。423Please respect copyright.PENANAiigwjDtQym
423Please respect copyright.PENANAoZ2SaTZEBt
而老舊的懷表盡其所能的拖緩指針的步伐,每一度都轉得艱辛。那模樣宛如要替主人多爭取一點時間似的,充滿徒勞卻美好的意象。423Please respect copyright.PENANAVXyPCfSmDu
423Please respect copyright.PENANA7kp1GfYf4N
然後,指針重合——423Please respect copyright.PENANAXStqslcYoR
423Please respect copyright.PENANAFEs9BOhHEq
一天就這樣結束了。
423Please respect copyright.PENANAcMKr2578Yz
(世界要毀滅了,可是我喜歡你。)
423Please respect copyright.PENANAEiDR9B0bt0